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10 Simple Steps To Helping Your Child Cultivate A Joyful Life

10 Simple Steps To Helping Your Child Cultivate A Joyful Life

Being a kid is serious business nowadays. Times have changed and kids today can be almost as stressed out as their working parents.

In this day and age, many people would give anything to have a child that was not stressed out, but wouldn’t it be great if you could help your child cultivate a joyful life? Is it possible?

Yes, it is!  So much of life is about learning. Kids watch us and emulate us even when we are not at our best. Kids do learn to be stressed and unhappy so the truth is they can learn to create joy for themselves and others.

Here are 10 simple steps to set your child up so that he or she can cultivate a joyful life.

1. Be joyful yourself.

On My God! Is that what I really said? So much easier said than done right?

The fact is that children do learn from us. They learn which objects, people, attitudes and viewpoints are important in life by watching how we react. If you are stressed out, they become stressed out and it never dawns on them that there can be another way of dealing with the situations that cause stress.

You, yourself living a stressed out life can cause them to believe that being stressed out is normal and that this is the way you have to be to be an adult. In order to give a child a good example of how to deal with life, you have to handle and reduce your stress to manageable levels.

The first step you must take on the road to managing your stress is to realize that some stress is a normal part of life but if you are stressed out all the time, that is not normal and something must change. You must handle your lifestyle and make the necessary changes.

If you are stressed out, sit down and figure out the exact reason why. If it is your job, what can you do to change the situation? If you have tried to change it and found that you could not, look for a transfer or look for another job. So many people have a huge fear of changing jobs. But if your job is stressing you out, what better lesson to teach your child than to have the confidence in yourself to make the changes in your life to make it better?

Being in a situation that creates stress in you affects your confidence insidiously and in a very negative way. If you are afraid of changing, chances are that the stress has worked heavily on your confidence, and how you feel about your true abilities is NOT reality.

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In every situation in life, you have made it through somehow. Have confidence that whatever happens, you will find your way.

Many times, stress in our lives stem from the people in our lives. This brings me to my next point.

2. Teach your child to detect and avoid negative people.

I cannot put too much emphasis on this statement because in life, the biggest cause of unhappiness is being around or intimate with negative people. Negativity is a cancer that permeates a family or a group. I am sure you can think of a time you were perfectly happy and until you were around a negative person. You left either angry, sad, or feeling some other negative emotion didn’t you? That is what happens.

Children, unfortunately do not have a lot of choice in who they spend time with. Make sure that they are not forced to spend time with negative people and whatever you do, do not allow a negative person to take care of your child.

In general, negative people tend to be more irresponsible and when things go awry, tend to blame others. If your child is unfortunate enough to have a negative person as one of his or her teachers, ask for a transfer. If your daycare provider is a negative person, get a new one. Go through your list of the people with whom you associate and identify the negative ones. Then, eliminate or severely limit any association with these people for yourself and your child.

Part of your duty as a parent is to safeguard your child’s environment. His environment includes the people around him or her. If you can’t get the negative people to stop being negative, get them out of your life. Just this simple step alone, though sometimes difficult, can smooth out the roughest and most stressful life.

It is worth taking the time to do this step thoroughly. Do not allow yourself to be made guilty and manipulated by these people either. Many of them are great at making you feel  guilty but realize that they have a choice in life. They can continue to be negative and harmful or they can turn around. It is up to them, but you and your child should not be around this type of person if they refuse to change. The damage they inflict on the unsuspecting is very great.

This goes for anyone negative in your environment, relatives, teachers, doctors, anybody. There are good people everywhere. They are easy to find. Seek those people out and cultivate friendships with them. You will all be happier, and being around happy and successful people makes you more happy and successful.

3. Teach your child to help others.

Helping others is one of the purest joys in life. There is no joy like watching a person become really happy and knowing we did something to make that happen. Even the littlest children will bring you gifts just for the privilege of seeing you smile.

When I was a kid, I used to stop at a tree on the side of the road on my way home from school. Every day I would pick up an autumn leaf. I would look and look until I found the prettiest one, then I would pick it up and take it to my mom. She would stick them on the fridge and we would be sad when they dried out and fell apart.

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One day I came home and found that she had taken sheets of wax paper and ironed the leaves between them preserving the leaves forever in time.

I was so happy because I knew that those leaves were so special to her that she wanted to keep them. Even though I was a small child, I realized that I had given her a great gift just as she had given me one by taking the care to preserve them. It didn’t take long before our fridge was so covered in wax paper and leaves that I had trouble opening it.

4. Show your child the beauty in every day things.

Everywhere in this world, there is beauty. Perhaps we don’t notice it as much any more but I am sure there was a time when you woke up and could not wait to get outside, or a time when you stopped to admire a beautiful view.

As I have gotten older, I have never stopped looking at the autumn leaves. The trees can be so beautiful when they are dressed up in their autumn best. Sometimes, I will take walk and look at people’s gardens. Did it ever occur to you that people plant gardens in their front yard just for you to see and enjoy? Point this out to your child. It may be a new idea to him that someone would work so hard to give joy to strangers.

Everywhere you look people create beauty and wonderful effects. There is music all around us. There are funny people whose joy in life is making others laugh. There are people who dress up every day with the idea that they are going to give everyone who looks at them a treat for the eyes.

Notice these things and point them out to your child. If he sees that they are important to you, he will decide that they are important to him. He will create a habit of noticing the things that make life so precious.

5. For Gosh Sakes Don’t be soooo serious!

Find things every day to laugh about! Get an hilarious movie and laugh yourself silly! Get out the crayons and draw really goofy things! Let your imagination go wild! Laughter and joy go hand in hand. If you develop a serious side, you are robbing yourself and your child of joy. It is true that we cannot be joyful all the time but I really do believe that we take the serious thing way too far.

I have found that I get a lot more productive when I am having fun than when I am serious.

When was the last time you took out a coloring book and a fresh box of crayons, you know the new ones that have points on them and are all in one piece? I teach music to kids and we use crayons daily.

A few days ago I bought myself a new big box of crayons! I opened it up and smelled it. Remember when the smell of new Crayons was a big deal? Now all I needed was a really good coloring  book and I was all set! Yes, I am a grown up! You want to come over and color with me? It’ll be FUN! Bring the kids!

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6. Teach your child that a day of honest work feels GOOD!

Kids naturally want to contribute to the betterment of everyone around them.

Teach them some basic skills they can use to help you and let them do it. They will be happier! Every so often you can teach them a new skill.

I am sure that kids think that food sort of magically cooks itself. How would it be for them to know how to make something simple like toast or a grilled cheese sandwich? Teach them safety and keep an eye on them but let them go at it!

7. Teach your child that working to get things is way more satisfying than having them given to you.

I had a nice chat with one of my wonderful friends yesterday and she told me about a friend she had when she was growing up. This friend was always beautiful and received a lot of attention from men. She had married three times and each time the man in her life had given her everything she wanted, cars, furs, jewels, everything and each time she had divorced them. These were good men but the mistake they made was contributing to someone without expecting something in return.

That contribution does not have to be a material thing, it can be love, nice meals, a clean and comfy house, music played when he is relaxing, anything that makes someone’s life better.

When a person only receives and never gives, he or she is miserable and they don’t know why.

My friend told me that his was a lesson for her early in her life. She knew that it was not the receiving of items that gave her joy, it was the fact that she had worked for them and made them happen.

Think about it. Was there something that you worked hard for and finally achieved? Wasn’t that victory extra sweet? I have found over and over again that things given to us that we did not work for, are just not as cherished as those we really worked to try and get. Creating this mind set in your child will make his life joyful.

I have known many people who suffer greatly because they have a mindset that makes them firmly believe that they should be given things that they have not worked for. They have no idea that, in order to be happy, they must contribute in some way back to the person who has contributed to them.

This is just how life works. If we take and never give, we are miserable. On the other hand, if we look for ways of giving to and serving others, we are happy. Those who do this are the happiest people I know.

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Those who don’t will never know the feeling of achieving a goal that they have set for themselves and worked hard to realize. And sooner or later, other people get tired of giving without receiving anything in return. Ultimately our success or failure starts and ends with us. There is no one that can give it to us and the happiest people I know fully realize that and embrace it.

8. Help your child adopt a pet and teach him how to care for it.

Having a pet is one of the big joys in life. Knowing that there is a living thing that depends on you for its survival is very empowering and it fosters compassion in a child. Make sure your child knows how to care for his pet and always double check the food and water dishes because good habits take time to create and you don’t want your child to learn the hard way that pets die when they are not cared for. Teach your child but have his back!

9. Take time off!

Your obligations will be there when you return. Get someone to cover for you and take some time off to spend with your child. Better yet, make time every day where you just enjoy each other. Some of the most fun times I had was playing Candyland over and over again while my son beat the pants off me at it. (Honestly how many times can a person land on Mr. Plumpy? Are those dice rigged?)

I also loved having my kids, fresh out of the tub and in their jammies sitting with me on the couch as we watched 101 Dalmatians for the millionth time.

10. Hug your kids wherever and whenever you can.

While they are little, our kids hug warmly and with abandon. When my littlest was young he hung on me all the time. Everywhere I went, he was there in my arms or holding my hand. I look back and see photos of us everywhere, arms entwined and smiling. I took it for granted. Who knew that simply being in constant physical contact was the cause of so much happiness?

Before long, the hugs became more reserved and we no longer hold hands or wrap our arms around one another. I no longer ruffle his hair as he passes and he no longer lays in my lap begging for a back rub. He is a man now, not a little boy.

I miss it a lot. I would give anything to rock him in my lap all bundled up and smelling like baby shampoo just one more time.

Take these hugs and this love given so freely and without any inhibition. Kids learn all too soon that affection given so generously can result  in broken hearts. Perhaps our unconditional acceptance of this love and these hugs can in some way form a protective barrier for our children from life’s most unforgiving realities.

This love and these hugs we receive from them are gifts far beyond any gift we will ever receive. Take them, cherish them and give them back. You and your child are a loving team and many times, in this life of hard edges and sometimes harsh realities, you need to come back together and rebuild the strength that comes from your closeness with each other.

I hope I have given you some helpful information. Above all else, your child loves you devotedly. Don’t turn your back on this gift or minimize it in any way. It is the most important thing in your life. It is your greatest source of joy.

XO Chris

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Chris Ellis

Successful Author, Life Coach and Musician

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Last Updated on October 14, 2020

How to Be Confident: 51 Proven Ways to Build Self-Confidence

How to Be Confident: 51 Proven Ways to Build Self-Confidence

When you learn how to be confident, you can use it in your everyday life to tackle all of your goals and challenges. However, not many people realize that learning how to gain self-confidence is like building a muscle—it grows in response to the level of performance required of it.

Here I will give you 51 proven ways to overcome a lack of self-confidence and achieve more.

1. Learn Something New

Sign up for that evening class and enjoy it. Alternatively, read a book (or take an online course) on a topic you’ve always wanted to learn more about.

Learning new things stretches your abilities, keeps your mind active, and most definitely improves your confidence in your ability to do new things.

2. Ask Your Partner or a Friend What You Can Do For Them

This can be something as easy as helping them with a chore they don’t like or have little time for. Through helping them, you’ll find that you feel better about yourself.

3. Hit the Gym

The physiological effects of going to the gym will leave you feeling great.

Countless studies have shown that regular workouts at the gym can boost not only your sense of well-being, but can increase your self-esteem, too[1].

4. Go to a Networking Event

Rather than being nervous about your own stuff, focus on how to help others. Instead of going along with the aim of trying to sell yourself to others, why not change your approach and simply go along to see how you can help the people you meet?

By doing this, you’ll come across as calm, confident, and someone that people will want to turn to again and again.

5. Get Clear on the Things That Matter to You

If these things are not in your life, you’ll need to bring them in.

For example, if your daily work routine is currently as dull as dishwater—but you’d like it to be fun—then do something about it. Turn data entry into personal speed contests, paper filing into “screen-free” time, and interactions with your colleagues into enjoyable conversations.

6. Remove Negativity From Your Life

Write a list of the things you’re tolerating and putting up with in your life, then write down how you can remove, minimize, or diminish each one.

I personally like to do this with pen and paper as it feels just a little more real and definite than on screen. It’s also a good idea to put the priority items at the top of your list, so you can begin resolving these first.

7. Celebrate Your Big and Small Wins

Look at the big or small goals you’ve completed, and give yourself credit for your part in it.

Recognizing your achievements is not egotistical, it’s healthy.

8. Converse With New People

Go and have a conversation with someone you don’t know. By doing this, you may be pleasantly surprised by what—or who—you’ll discover.

You can also extend this trait by breaking outside of your normal social situations at your workplace. This will do wonders when learning how to be confident.

9. Do Something You Would Normally Say No to

Next time you talk yourself out of doing something (a party invite, a challenging project, etc.), go and do it anyway. This is a great way to boost personal development.

10. Do One Thing Each Day That Makes You Smile

This could be something as simple as sending a thank you email to a colleague that has been helpful to you, or leaving a surprise present for your partner that they’ll discover when they wake up.

Life shouldn’t be drudgery, and we all need to make the effort to keep it light, loving, and fun.

11. Give Yourself Good Advice

Look for the patterns of thought that take you to a place where you start second-guessing or overthinking.

Now imagine that your best friend went through exactly the same thought process and ended up holding themselves back—what would you want to say to them?

This is known as Soloman’s Paradox—we’re often quite good at solving others’ problems but not our own. Challenge this and take your own good advice next time[2].

12. Ask Someone on a Date

If you’re single and have met someone that you’re definitely attracted to—go ahead and ask them out.

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Even if they turn you down, it will help you learn how to be confident through the fact that you were decisive and made an effort. What’s the best thing that could happen? They might just say yes!

13. Write Down 20 Things That Make You Feel Good

Think of this as a gratitude list. Typical things you might include are: your partner, your kids, your parents, your pets, etc.

I recommend writing this list at least once a month. And most importantly—make sure you’re giving the 20 things plenty of room in your life.

14. Stop Playing Different Roles

Stop playing different roles and squeezing yourself into boxes based on what you think people expect of you.

Be your authentic self, the one who knows what to do and loves what they do. It’s easy to find this part of yourself as it’s inherent in your hobbies and your close friendships.

If you can bring this authenticity into your work life, you’ll be surprised at how positively others will react to you.

15. Cultivate a Positive Mindset

Learn to catch yourself every time you tell yourself that you can’t have, won’t get, or aren’t good enough to get what you want[3].

Talk yourself up when learning how to be confident.

    Instead, tell yourself that you can have, will get, and are good enough to get what you want. Mindset is everything. Make sure yours is positive and dynamic.

    16. Take Yourself off Auto-Pilot

    Make deliberate decisions on what really matters to you.

    For instance, if you normally work 9 to 5 but find yourself spending hours getting to and from work, why not negotiate with your boss to mix your hours up a bit?

    You might also suggest a day or two working from home. Sell this to your boss by reminding them that the time and stress lost to commuting can be neatly transferred to productive work hours.

    17. Listen Carefully to What You Tell Yourself

    Next time you come up against a risk or a challenge, listen to what you tell yourself, and look for a way to improve your inner dialogue.

    If you normally find that your inner dialogue is negative, then break out of this by asking yourself questions such as:

    • What would make this easier?
    • Is there a different way of doing this?
    • Could research help?

    18. Laugh at Yourself

    Scared of looking silly? It’s no biggie, so don’t let it stop you.

    Whenever we try something new, there’s a fair chance that we’ll make fools of ourselves. But you’d be a bigger fool to let that stop you. Instead, laugh at your baby steps and watch your confidence soar as you begin to master your chosen activity.

    19. Listen to Your Doubts

    Sometimes your doubts are there to let you know what you need to prepare for, so you can use them to your benefit as you move forwards. Other times, they are just doubts.

    The trick is to quickly determine if your doubts have validity. If they do, use them to shape your decisions.

    To illustrate this, imagine that you’ve had an enticing job offer, but you doubt whether you’re capable of doing the job. Spend a little time analyzing your doubts to see whether they reflect reality, or whether they are just negative thoughts that are trying to hold you back.

    20. Recall a Time When You Did a Great Job

    Think of a time when it felt like a whole bank of switches in your head flicked to the on position, and you were firing on all cylinders. What were you doing, and what’s the reason it felt so great? Can you emulate that passion and drive that you had?

    21. Tear up Your Rule Book

    You may not know it, but you’ve almost certainly got a whole bunch of outdated rules that determine what you do and don’t do. These rules limit your thinking and your behavior.

    It’s time to change them. Tear up this subconscious rule book and toss it in the fire. Once you’ve done this, you’ll immediately notice how free you feel to make challenging and exciting decisions.

    22. Ask Yourself What You Have Gained When You Lose

    Do you get annoyed with yourself because you didn’t make the most of something or stepped back from an opportunity?

    Firstly, don’t beat yourself up because that’s just going to make you feel worse. Instead, be brutally honest and ask yourself what you gained from the situation and what you lost out on.

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    Based on this win/lose balance, what’s a different choice you can make next time?

    23. Don’t Let People Put You Down

    If there’s someone in your life who puts you down or makes you feel small, you owe it to yourself to let them know that you expect something different from now on. 

    Trust me, once you’ve told them, they’ll change, and you will, too. Inevitably, you’ll boost both your confidence and happiness by taking control of your life in this way.

    Learn how to get out of toxic relationships in this article.

    24. Reveal a Little Bit of the Real You

    Relationships can be difficult. They can also lose their zest and become stale. If this happens in your relationship, then it’s time to add some magic to the mix.

    Try revealing something interesting about yourself or your past that your partner doesn’t currently know when learning how to be confident. Perhaps you never mentioned to them that you used to play in a rock band—and you still have the recordings to prove it!

    By adding new things to your relationship, you’ll deepen the bond and keep the spark alive.

    25. Be Your Own Hero

    Recognize that you’re more than a match for any situation you might find yourself in—no matter how tough the going gets.

    We all love movies like Die Hard where ordinary people are driven to super-ordinary feats. But here’s the rub: you can be your own action hero.

    Whatever the situation, meet it head on and overcome it. Keep in mind the classic phrase: “Where there’s a will, there’s a way.”

    26. Don’t Give in to the Instant Pay-off

    If I was to offer you $100 now for a day’s work tomorrow or $110 for the same work, but I won’t pay you for a week, which would you choose? Well, I can’t read your mind, but I do know that studies using a similar question to this have found that most people choose the instant, smaller payment over the latter, bigger payment. It seems that we’re hardwired for instant gratification.

    However, if you want to be a success in life, always look at the bigger picture. In the example above, if you could have only waited seven more days, you would have been $10 richer!

    27. Instead of Yelling “I Deserve Better,” Say “I Can Be Better”

    Too often I hear people complaining about their personal circumstances but refusing to do anything about it. Don’t be like them.

    If things aren’t going your way, find solutions and implement them. Your boldness and decisiveness will boost your confidence and help you rapidly climb the ladder of success.

    28. Admit You’re Wrong

    It may not be easy, but you should always be prepared to hold your hands up and change your mind if things are going south. Not every idea you have will be a winning one. The trick is to know when things are clearly not working out.

    You can either attempt to get them back on track or kill them off completely (sometimes that’s the best way).

    29. Trust Your Instincts

    We all have our gut feelings and intuitions, but many people choose to ignore them and rely only on facts, facts, and more facts! While this may work for many scenarios, there will be other times when you’ll need to rely on your instincts.

    30. Imagine Your Confident Future Self

    Imagine you’re visited by a successful, confident, attractive, and vibrant version of you from the future, a version of you who’s everything you hope to be. What do they want to tell you?

    They might praise your efforts, but they may also criticize your lack of planning and weak goals.

    Luckily, if you listen closely to what they tell you, you’ll be able to rapidly shift gears in your life and become the you of the future!

    31. Ask for Help

    This is a common issue. We take on way too many responsibilities and end up either burning ourselves out or just doing a bad job!

    The secret is to put the vast majority of your energy and efforts into what you do well. Give the stuff you don’t do well to others who have a gift for it. Sometimes the most confident and effective thing to do is ask for help.

    32. Be Around People Who Make You Feel Like You

    Do this by spending more time with the people who support and encourage you and less time with those who undermine you.

    At work, don’t be ruined by negative, petty people. Instead, make sure you surround yourself with colleagues who make you laugh and feel good about yourself.

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    33. Participate in the World Around You

    Ask yourself this question: “What can I participate in that’s important to me?”

    Typically, this could be your church, a sports club, or even just a weekly get together with your best friend.

    34. Develop Skills to Work on Things That Matter to You

    What can you practice that would radically improve your chances of winning?

    If you want to climb the corporate ladder, for example, then develop the skills needed to do this. These might include: effective project management skills, powerful presentation abilities, and superb goal setting skills.

    Of course, don’t forget that emulating those who have already achieved your goal is one of the quickest and most reliable ways for you to achieve your aims, too.

    35. Act Until You Make It

    The body is a mirror for the mind, so shifting your body language into a confident state can have surprising results.

    This is all about acting. If you want to come across as tough, act tough. If you want to come across as successful, act successful. And if you want to come across as confident, act confident.

    Try doing these things, and you’ll be amazed by the results.

    36. Push Through When You Want to Give up

    Don’t get disheartened or demotivated when you get to 90% with something you’re working on. Push through, and you’ll see that the last 10% is where the magic happens.

    37. Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

    Keep comparing yourself to others? Stop it. If you want to learn how to be confident, don’t try to validate yourself through comparison—you’re just peachy as you are.

    Social media often makes this difficult. Try stepping away from your Facebook page for a few days and reconnect with the great things in your own life.

    You can get started with this guide.

    38. Speak up When You Can Make a Difference

    Speak up if there’s something you think could be improved or if you have an idea you think has legs.

    Have you noticed that quiet people at work rarely get the promotions? It’s not that they are incapable or lacking talent, but their abilities are usually overlooked as they don’t know how to engage with others or how to sell themselves.

    Step out of your comfort zone and be sure that you’re an active player. Speak up in meetings by suggesting ideas and offering constructive criticism.

    39. Stop Struggling and Start Accepting

    If there’s something you’ve been struggling to understand for a while, stop trying to understand it. Accept it just as it is, fully and wholly.

    Life offers endless mysteries. If you try to resolve them all you’ll drive yourself insane. Instead, let some mysteries remain, and keep your mind focused on your goals and dreams.

    40. It’s Okay to Be Shy

    There’s nothing wrong with being shy, and it doesn’t mean you’re not a confident person.

    If you suffer from shyness, you might think it’s a major weakness of yours. However, introverted people have the edge in many ways, such as: they’re first-rate listeners, they have excellent observational skills, and they’re easier to trust[4].

    41. Clean up Your Environment

    Your environment directly impacts your self-perception. So, if you’re surrounded by clutter, paperwork, and rubbish, put a morning aside to clean up your stuff and get organized.

    42. Write a List of Things You Would Love to Do

    Write yourself a list of the amazing things you’d love to do in your life, and make a start by simply looking into the first one or two things that leap out at you. This will help you get started as you learn how to be confident

    Even if you don’t currently have the means to live your dreams, you can, at the very least, make a start. The best way to do this is to write out the things you’d love to do. These may include cool stuff, such as travelling the world, learning a new language, or climbing a mountain.

    Once you’ve added the items to your list, don’t stop there. Begin researching and preparing ways to turn your dreams into realities.

    43. Make Your Self-Worth Independent From Others’ Validation

    Don’t make your happiness or self-worth dependent on being in a relationship or being validated by someone else.

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    While it’s difficult to admit it, we often find ourselves rating our self-esteem by the value other people put on us.

    For instance, you may have a super-positive boss who is always encouraging and supportive. They make you feel upbeat and confident at all times.

    However, imagine if they left and your new boss was the complete opposite. They constantly look for faults in your work and regularly criticize you. Would you still feel confident in those circumstances?

    If you’ve answered no, then you need to reappraise your self-worth, as it shouldn’t be dependent on the validation of others.

    44. Use Your Strengths

    We all have our weaknesses, but they only undermine your confidence if you let them.

    For instance, are you aware that Virgin’s founder Richard Branson suffers from dyslexia? He never let this hold him back or destroy his confidence. Today, he is one of the world’s most successful men, with a net worth of approximately $5 billion[5].

    45. Complete a To-Do List

    The longer you leave that big thing on your to-do list, the more it’ll drain you, and the bigger it’ll seem. Get it done and free yourself up.

    If you have a big goal, break it down into smaller tasks. For instance, instead of trying to write a whole chapter of your book in one go, how about just writing the opening paragraph?

    46. Treat Your Body Well

    When learning how to be confident, our body image does matter, because if you have a bad relationship with your body, you won’t feel confident in yourself.

    What’s one of the first things most of us do when we get up in the morning? We look in the mirror. If we don’t like what we see there, then our day starts off with negative self-talk. If, on the other hand, we look in the mirror and feel proud of our appearance, then we start the day off in an upbeat, positive way.

    If you’re unhappy with your body and looks, do something to improve them. Exercise, diet, and styling are common ways of improving your body image—and your confidence.

    47. Learn to Say No

    Don’t say yes to taking on a task simply because you don’t want to rock the boat. You can politely decline requests you can’t meet without needing to create excuses.

    While saying yes to everything that comes your way might feel like you’re being helpful and in demand, in the long run, you’ll burn yourself out.

    48. Learn From Confident People

    Look at the people you respect who seem confident. Don’t copy them, but identify what it is they do differently that conveys confidence and what you can learn from it.

    People-watching is not only fun, but it can be informative, too. Look closely at successful people you know, or those being interviewed on TV, and over time you’ll begin to notice common traits, beliefs, and behaviors that they exhibit.

    49. Follow Through on Your Plans

    Most people find it easy to write plans. The hard part, of course, is seeing them through. To stand out from the crowd, make sure that you know exactly how to complete your plans.

    If you need to, write down a step-by-step guide and begin following it. Not only will this drive you towards the completion of your plans—but experiencing the progress will also give you a continuous boost to your self-esteem.

    50. Shift Your Focus When You Doubt Yourself

    When you feel yourself focusing inwards and becoming paralyzed with doubt or fear, switch to focusing outwards at what you can engage and interact with.

    I remember one of my writing tutors telling me that when the words stop flowing, it’s time to take a break— preferably a walk in the park. It’s sound advice as it’s very easy to get caught up with our thoughts and emotions and be unable to make progress.

    51. Never Beat Yourself up for Failing

    Life is guaranteed to not always be a barrel of laughs. Instead, it’s much more like a roller coaster. There will be ups and downs, so ride them out.

    The art of living is to know how to handle whatever comes you way. The best way to achieve this is by developing an iron core that is unhindered by the topsy-turvy outside world.

    Final Thoughts

    Here I’ve given you 51 different ways to start building self-confidence Take action on the ways that you’re drawn to.

    It’s not enough to read about them. For them to work, you must adopt them into your daily life. Do this, and you’ll start to feel your confidence soar.

    More on How to Be Confident

    Featured photo credit: Matheus Ferrero via unsplash.com

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