Advertising

Why It’s So Important to Know the Difference Between Self-Help and Personal Growth

Why It’s So Important to Know the Difference Between Self-Help and Personal Growth
Advertising
    Photo credit: Jesper Sachmann (CC BY-NC-SA 2.0)

    To many of us the terms “self-help” and “personal growth”  are interchangeable. But while they may give the external appearance of having twin meanings, in the external perception they are more akin to those tiny figures that we would see perched on the shoulders of a character on television. If you can, visualize the angel on one shoulder and the devil on the other and you’ll get my meaning.

    One is a near obsession with fixing some innate flaws, either real or imagined, which are a blemish on our existence. We just know that if we could fix ourselves, life would be pure bliss. Or would it?

    The other is based on the belief that we are fine the way we are, though not perfect, we are good enough already. But that we are a work in progress and there is a desire to expand in some way, through gaining knowledge, through improving our skill or through cultivating healthier or more positive behaviors.

    Advertising

    Though I may be splitting hairs over textbook definitions, the true difference is in how the perception of the journey affects both our attitude and our actions. We resist change when we feel bad about ourselves; condemned, criticized and judged (usually we are the ones offering up our own judgment.) We embrace change when it elicits happy feelings of fulfillment and accomplishment.

    A few examples to illustrate my theory…

    Weight/Health issue

    Self-Help Perspective: I can’t fit into my jeans. I need to lose 20…30…50 pounds, then I’ll be happier. What is wrong with me? I’ve tried so many diets. I just need to exercise more. Ugh

    Advertising

    Personal Growth Perspective: I want to be healthy and have more energy to allow me to live the life I love. This is the only body I have and I choose to nurture it by making healthier food choices and moving to keep my heart and muscles strong and fit.

    Organization issue

    Self-Help Perspective: I have got to get it together. My house (car, office) is always a mess. I can’t find anything. I never seem to get anything done. I just need to find the right system. Or maybe I could hire someone to come in and clean it all up.

    Personal Growth Perspective: I set my priorities. I won’t accumulate things I don’t need. I’ll ask for help from someone who can offer effective strategies on how to better manage my life, my home or my work. I acknowledge that external disorganization is a symptom of lack of internal focus. I need to be clear about what I want.

    Advertising

    Money issue

    Self-Help Perspective: I need a better “get out of debt” plan. But the book said if I just followed the guidelines, I could be a millionaire…I need a job that pays more money.

    Personal Growth Perspective: I work toward my debt and savings goals consistently. I understand that it can be a slow process. I treat money with respect and gratitude. I am grateful to have a job. I invest in myself and my career by improving my marketable skills.

    You get the idea. Though this may be an exaggeration to illustrate a point, I think the difference in perception and attitude is readily apparent. And while the actions taken may actually be the same, the results will differ greatly, because the intention is different.

    Advertising

    We instinctively push back against the idea that we are lacking and “should” fix ourselves. We are drawn to the idea that we are wonderful and getting better all the time.

    Which way of thinking sounds more enticing to you? Which strategy do you think has better long term results? Which perception do you think contributes more to your happiness in life?

    More by this author

    Royale Scuderi

    A creative strategist, consultant and writer who specializes in cultivating human potential for happiness, health and fulfillment.

    The Best Way to Create a Vision for the Life You Want 3 Simple Ways to Invest in Yourself and Change Your Life 50 Unique and Really Fun Date Ideas for Couples Why You Need to Say No! More Often How to Fall Asleep Fast and Have a Restful Sleep (The Definitive Guide)

    Trending in Lifehack

    1 Lifehack Reviews: 50 Best Life Hacks for Your Life 2 Best Life Hack Sites – 100 Most Useful Websites on The Internet 3 80 How-To Sites Worth Bookmarking 4 20 Unusual Uses for Coca-Cola That You’ve Never Considered 5 A Review of the Book “The Art of Learning”

    Read Next

    Advertising
    Advertising

    Last Updated on July 12, 2021

    Lifehack Reviews: 50 Best Life Hacks for Your Life

    Lifehack Reviews: 50 Best Life Hacks for Your Life
    Advertising

    Do you want to be as productive as many of us, but missed a lot of actions at lifehack.org during the year? We’ve selected the best 50 life hacks, based on their popularity and contents in different categories. Invest your time – read them. Bookmark this page and mark reading them as one of your new year resolutions.

    Communication, Writing, Studying

    1. My Best Presentation Tricks
    2. The Business Card Game
    3. Persuasive Writing for Students, Webmasters, Bloggers, and Everyone Else
    4. 7 tips of handling your Emails without feeling overwhelmed
    5. Writing as a Form of Self Healing
    6. Advice for students: Writing by hand
    7. Yes, But Do People Like You?
    8. Writing – Just do it!
    9. A good place to study
    10. Blog your way through Writer’s Block
    11. 14 Tips for Communicating Ideas

    Productivity, Creativity, Motivation

    1. 9 Top Secrets of Naturally Born Organizers
    2. Fight The Flab!
    3. More Fight The Flab!
    4. Limit Creativity, Get Innovation
    5. Precious Moments
    6. 5 Ways to Improve Your Productivity in the Office
    7. A Geek’s Best Lifehack
    8. What Kind of Paranoid Are You?
    9. Being A Creative
    10. There’s No Time!
    11. The Mysteries Behind Motivation and How To Manipulate Them
    12. Time Management: Handling Disruptions in Daily Schedules
    13. Productivity Hack: Write Mini Process Flows
    14. Design an Online Workflow

    Management, Self-Management, Entrepreneurship

    1. Bare Bones Project Hacks
    2. The 10 Beliefs of Great Managers
    3. The Simplest Path to Success
    4. Letting Things Go
    5. Closet Entrepreneur
    6. Time To Discard The Portmanteau
    7. 5 Important Keys to Bootstrap Your Entrepreneurship
    8. The Most Underutilized Tool for Effective Communication
    9. Everyday Performance Reviews
    10. Meetings, @&!!$*@ Meetings!
    11. What Are You Worried About?
    12. How to Ruin Your Career In Five Easy Steps

    Procrastination, Goal Settings, Life

    1. 9 Steps to Define your Goal Destination and Devise a Plan to Get There
    2. Pro-Active Steps to Prevent Procrastination
    3. Improve Your Life By Following A Schedule
    4. The Causes of Procrastination And How To Conquer Them
    5. How To Make Resolutions You’ll Keep
    6. Literal Life Hack: Cut your window of time in half
    7. New Year’s Resolutions and Deficit Thinking
    8. 6 Sleep Tips
    9. Risks versus Rewards Worksheet
    10. 5 Tips for Getting Out of Debt (and Why)
    11. Deep Breathing: A Great Health Trick
    12. 8 Expenses to Cut and How
    13. Desk-side Fitness

    Are there any lifehacks that you’ve learned over the past year?

    Advertising

    Featured photo credit: Rainier Ridao via unsplash.com

    Advertising

    Advertising

    Read Next