Advertising
Advertising

The Next Time You Travel…Travel With Fear

The Next Time You Travel…Travel With Fear
    Photo by Carolucyjones

    I was reading a Chinese travel book recently, by the Editor-in-Chief of the Chinese edition of Business Weekly and a FT Contributor, Xu Zhiyuan. In his preface, he quoted Albert Camus’ The Notebooks, on what travel meant:

    “What gives value to travel is fear. It is the fact that, at a certain moment, when we are so far from our own country we are seized by a vague fear, and an instinctive desire to go back to the protection of old habits. This is the most obvious benefit of travel. At that moment we are feverish but also porous, so that the slightest touch makes us quiver to the depths of our being. We come across a cascade of light, and there is eternity.”

    This struck a chord with me. I’ve lived and worked in 6 countries, whilst travelling to visit over 150 cities in the world. Yet, I don’t remember all of it; the travelling that had the most profound effect on me were also the ones filled with fear. It might not have been a jungle exploration or coming close to being eaten by a lion on the African safari, but more so, the sense of insecurity I had felt when meshed in unfamiliar geographies.

    Advertising

    The instinctual response to fear is to get rid of it. The web is loaded with articles on how to get rid of fear. I agree that unnecessary fear inhibits the mind, but I advocate that we embrace the fear within us and transform it into fuel.

    Every time I had travelled or moved to a different country since I can remember, I was wrought with fear. Fear for the uncertainty, the language barrier, security, or simply, where can I buy breakfast. Every bit of travelling expended mental energy. Sometimes, I was so exhausted from trying to explain myself in frantic gestures in order to get a bottle of water from the corner shop because I couldn’t utter the local language, that I’d prefer to go thirsty. Other times, I was just afraid people would laugh at my strange accent.

    The fear made me feel uncomfortable, and embarrassed. Indeed, the reaction was to go home to what I was familiar with, or to go travelling only to a place I had been before and knew my way around. However, the fear also made me more alert to my surroundings.

    Advertising

    A few years back, as I sat at Angkor Wat, breathing in the majesty of the ancient architecture and the spirituality of the construction, I also noticed little children dressed in rags, running around selling cold water for USD1. Their joyful little faces for having sold a bottle touched my heart. I could not understand why they were so happy, and that I was filled with void and emptiness for making many more times that money at my job. They had no food, and I had gourmet cuisine at my fingertips. The Cambodians only recently experienced some of the most traumatizing genocide and human tragedies in their history. I had never seen a war. I was overwhelmed with compassion for the less fortunate around me. Surely, poverty existed also in my hometown, and yet I had never noticed it before. I had also, not had the time to slow down and think about the life I was living, fooling myself that I was enjoying it, and allowing my pride to over bolster my ego.

    Travelling brought me out of my comfort zone. I questioned myself: my life, my plans, and the community around me. I asked what I could do better for me and for others. I searched within my soul for the darkness and ugly side of me that I needed to confront. I was shaken with fear not only for burglars and unclean food in a city I had not been in, but for fear of what my life’s purpose was in the bigger picture and what I might discover of myself. I fear for what I might unveil about myself on the journey, because old habits were easier to indulge in.

    Since that fateful day in Siem Reap, I had been planning my exit from a corporate job, and also started taking part in more charity work for children wherever I might be based. Life took a different course than I had planned with my illness 2 years ago but that’s a different story for another day.

    Advertising

    Fear became a friend, and taught me to become sensitive to my inner voices, and empathetic to others. Fear brought about my self-awareness.

    Every time I travel, there is a nervous anticipation to what I might discover on the trip. Sunbathing on a beach or visiting the local museum alike, I let my senses open up to what the universe is trying to tell me.

    And so I urge you, the next time you travel to a foreign city, and you are scared of talking to a stranger, or how to get cash, allow the fear to consume you. Embrace the fear and let it open your eyes to things you did not think you would see.

    Advertising

    Travel with sensitivity. Fear can be your friend. Be not afraid of it. 

    More by this author

    10 Ways You Can Be Mean to Yourself (and Prevent Your Own Happiness) Guard Against “It Doesn’t Matter” The Next Time You Travel…Travel With Fear

    Trending in Lifehack

    1 5 Steps To Move Out Of Stagnancy In Life 2 How to Break Out of Your Comfort Zone 3 Why Do I Procrastinate? 5 Root Causes & How To Tackle Them 4 How Setting Personal Goals Makes You a Greater Achiever 5 The Lifehack Show: Overcoming Anxiety Through Personal Agency with Dr. Paul Napper

    Read Next

    Advertising
    Advertising
    Advertising

    Last Updated on January 21, 2020

    5 Steps To Move Out Of Stagnancy In Life

    5 Steps To Move Out Of Stagnancy In Life

    In the journey of growth, there are times when we grow and excel. We are endlessly driven and hyped up, motivated to get our goals.

    Then there are times when we stagnate. We feel uninspired and unmotivated. We keep procrastinating on our plans. More often than not, we get out of a rut only to get back into another one.

    How do you know if you are stagnating? Here are some tell-tale signs:

    • If you have been experiencing chronic procrastination on your goals
    • If you don’t ever feel like doing anything
    • If you keep turning to sleep, eating, games, mindless activities and entertainment for comfort
    • If you know you should be doing something, but yet you keep avoiding it
    • If you have not achieved anything new or significant now relative to 1 month, 2 months or 3 months ago
    • If you have a deep sense of feeling that you are living under your potential

    When we face stagnation in life, it’s a sign of deeper issues. Stagnancy in life, just like procrastination, is a symptom of a problem. It’s easy to beat ourselves over it, but this approach is not going to help.

    Here, I will share 5 steps to help you move out of this stagnation. They won’t magically transform your life in 1 night (such changes are never permanent because the foundations are not built), but they will help you get the momentum going and help you get back on track.

    Advertising

    1. Realize You’re Not Alone

    Everyone stagnates at some point or another. You are not alone in this and more importantly, it’s normal. In fact, it’s amazing how many of my clients actually face the same predicament, even though all of them come from different walks of life, are of different ages, and have never crossed paths.

    Realizing you are not alone in this will make it much easier to deal with this period. By trying to “fight it”, you’re only fighting yourself. Accept this situation, acknowledge it, and tell yourself it’s okay. That way, you can then focus on the constructive steps that will really help you.

    2. Find What Inspires You

    Stagnation comes because there isn’t anything that excites you enough to take action. If you don’t have a habit of setting goals, and instead just leave yourself to daily mundanes, it’s not surprising you are experiencing stagnation.

    What do you want to do if there are no limitations? If you can have whatever you want, what will it be? The answers to these questions will provide the fuel that will drive you forward.

    On the other hand, even if you are an experienced goal setter, there are times when the goals you set in the past lose their appeal now. It’s normal and it happens to me too. Sometimes we lose touch with our goals, since we are in a different emotional state compared to when we first set them. Sometimes our priorities change and we no longer want to work on those goals anymore. However, we don’t consciously realize this, and what happens is we procrastinate on our goals until it compounds into a serious problem.

    Advertising

    If that’s the case for you, it’s time to relook into your goals. There’s no point in pursuing goals that no longer inspire you. Trash away your old goals (or just put them aside) and ask yourself what you really want now. Then go for them.

    3. Give Yourself a Break

    When’s the last time you took a real break for yourself? 3 months? 6 months? 1 year? Never? Perhaps it’s time to take a time-out. Prolonged working can cause someone to become disillusioned as they lose sight of who they are and what they want.

    Go take some extended leave from work. A few days at bare minimum; a few weeks or months will be great. Some of my ex-colleagues have quit their jobs and took months out to do some self-reflection. Of course, some of us might not have that luxury, so we can stick to a few weeks of leave.

    Go on a trip elsewhere and get away from your work and your life. Use this chance to get a renewed perspective of life. Think about your life purpose, what you want and what you want to create for your life in the future.

    These are big questions that require deep thinking over them. It’s not about finding the answers at one go, but about taking the first step to finding the answers.

    Advertising

    4. Shake up Your Routines

    Being in the same environment, doing the same things over and over again and meeting the same people can make us stagnant. This is especially if the people you spend the most time with are stagnant themselves.

    Change things around. Start with simple things, like taking a different route to work and eating something different for breakfast. Have your lunch with different colleagues, colleagues you never talked much with. Work in a different cubicle if your work has free and easy seating. Do something different than your usual for weekday evenings and weekends. Cultivate different habits, like exercising every day, listening to a new series of podcasts every morning to work, reading a book, etc (here’re 6 Proven Ways To Make New Habits Stick). The different contexts will give you different stimulus, which will trigger off different thoughts and actions in you.

    When I’m in a state of stagnancy, I’ll get a sense of what’s making me stagnate. Sometimes it’s the environment I’m in, sometimes it’s the people I’ve been hanging out with, sometimes it’s my lifestyle. Most of the times it’s a combination of all these. Changing them up helps to stir myself out of the stagnant mode.

    5. Start with a Small Step

    Stagnation also comes from being frozen in fear. Maybe you do want this certain goal, but you aren’t taking action. Are you overwhelmed by the amount of work needed? Are you afraid you will make mistakes? Is the perfectionist in you taking over and paralyzing you?

    Let go of the belief that it has to be perfect. Such a belief is a bane, not a boon. It’s precisely from being open to mistakes and errors that you move forward.

    Advertising

    Break down what’s before you into very very small steps, then take those small steps, a little step at a time. I had a client who had been stagnating for a long period because he was afraid of failing. He didn’t want to make another move where he would make a mistake. However, not wanting to make a mistake has led him to do absolutely nothing for 2-3 years.

    On the other hand, by doing just something, you would already be making progress, whether it’s a mistake or not. Even if you make a supposed “mistake”,  you get feedback to do things differently in the next step. That’s something you would never have known if you never made a move.

    More to Help You Get Unstuck

    Featured photo credit: Anubhav Saxena via unsplash.com

    Read Next