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What’s Stopping You from Getting Started (and What to Do About It)

What’s Stopping You from Getting Started (and What to Do About It)
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If you’re like most people, you have a lot of projects on your back burner that you hope to get to someday but aren’t quite ready for. Writers call this a “one-day novel” — as in “one day I’m going to write that novel.” Of course, that one magical day never comes.

Perhaps too there are a few things on your list that have been sitting there, gnawing at you, forever, but just seem like to big a deal to get going on. You never seem to have enough time, enough energy, or enough who-knows-what to sit down and start working on them.

A lot of advice about motivation and reaching your goals applies more to the middle part of a project, where you’ve burned up all your initial enthusiasm ad now have to go through the daily routine of moving it forward to completion. But getting started can be just as hard, and even harder — especially when you’re looking at something that will make a major change in your life, like starting a business or writing a novel.

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Here are ten things that keep us from getting started, and some suggestions about how to deal with each.

  1. Lack of financial security: Money problems are a big killer of dreams; it can be hard to figure out how you can afford to launch a big project if you’re worried about how you’re going to pay the bills — not to mention the psychological issue of trying to focus when just keeping afloat from month to month is a major task.

    It’s a good idea to have a 3- or 6-month reserve fund, but what if you don’t? Does that mean you have to sit on your dreams until you can save up enough to stop worrying?

    To get going when money is tight, you need to address both the financial situation and the attention it steals from you. Tim Ferriss and Guy Kawasaki both have some interesting ideas about “bootstrapping”, getting a business going using minimal resources and re-investing early returns to help the business grow. The idea is to make your ventures pay for themselves. Consider if there are ways of making money from your project, or of starting with little investment.

    Another option is a trade-off — finding expenses you can cut out to pay for your new project. If a financial investment is absolutely necessary, you’ll need to practice frugality to make ends meet.

    But for most projects, it’s not the money we need to spend on them that’s an issue, it’s the need to work and the worries over money that steal our time and energy, making it difficult to focus on a new project — especially one that doesn’t have any immediate financial return.

    Time management and focus are what’s needed. Just as a financial trade-off might be needed, a time trade-off is in order. Consider things you do that could be sacrificed for your new project — an hour of TV watching swapped for an hour of writing, for example. Make the same trade-off with your attention — just as your TV watching is a way of relaxing and escaping the day-to-day worries about money, let your passion make your new project an escape.

  2. Lack of confidence in your plan: A lot of time we make a plan that seems perfect, but for some reason we hesitate to take action. One of two things is responsible for this: 1) we haven’t broken our project down to actionable items — we have “get investors” instead of “research 5 potential investors and contact them”. The other stumbling block is that, on some level, we just don’t really believe our plan will work. Usually this is because we’ve made “best case” assumptions, without planning for what to do if those assumptions don’t pan out. Go through your plan and ask yourself what you’re assuming at each step, and what you’ll do if those assumptions turn out to be wrong. What if you can only raise $10,000 instead of the $50,000 you feel you need? What if you aren’t happy with a main element of your novel’s plot? What if your first clients aren’t willing to give you recommendations for your website? Having a contingency plan can help you build up the confidence to get started.
  3. Lack of confidence in yourself: Maybe your plan is good and you’re financially ready, but you really don’t believe you’re good enough to pull it off. You might need to build up your skills, but that’s another topic — what if you know how, you just don’t know you know how.

    Building up your confidence can be a project in itself, but in the meantime, give yourself permission to fail. Assuming your life and livelihood aren’t on the line, failing is rarely as dramatic as we fear — and can teach of the lessons we need to succeed in the end. Writer Anne Lamott talks about writing “sucky first drafts” (actually, she uses a somewhat harsher and less family-friendly adjective), just letting yourself put down whatever comes to mind and telling yourself you can fix it later, and this idea can be applied to most projects aside from writing, too. Give up your desire for perfection and just concentrate on getting something — anything! — done, no matter how poorly.

  4. Too much on your plate already: One problem people face is that they clutter their days with so many meaningless tasks that there’s no room to work on anything else, no matter how important. If you find yourself putting off projects that are important to you because you just don’t have time, you probably aren’t facing the facts about your schedule. Sit down and figure out what you can eliminate, and what can wait until your project is done — put on the back burner the tasks that legitimately belong there, not the things that are important to you right now. Until you’ve committed the time to get started on your project, you haven’t really committed to the project itself.
  5. Can’t seem to focus: If you have set aside time to work on your project but just can’t seem to focus, one of two things may be wrong: either you haven’t clearly delineated your time and space to make a distraction-free space for your work, or there’s something inside you that’s working hard to keep you from getting started (for example, lack of confidence, in your plan or in yourself, as above). A lot of my tips for creating a distraction-free space for writing can apply to non-writing projects as well. Also, make sure you’ve explained to your family, friends, and whoever else might have a claim on your time how important your project is to you and what you need from them to get it done.
  6. Don’t know how to do it: Thinking of something you want to do can be easy; knowing how to get it done can be a lot harder. If you find yourself stalling, you may need to add classes, a trip to the library, or contacting an expert mentor to your plan. There’s no shame in not knowing how to do something; there is shame in letting your dreams fade because you aren’t willing to go out and learn how to make them real.
  7. Don’t know where to begin: If you’re not sure how to get started, you need to go back to your plan and make sure it’s detailed enough. One good trick is backwards planning: start with your objective, and figure out what the last step would be, then the step before that, and so on until you reach a step that’s in your immediate power.
  8. Lack of resources: In some cases, not having the things you need to get started is a financial problem, which we’ve already discussed. In other cases, it’s a matter of not knowing what you need, which we’ve also discussed. But it can often be a matter of planning, of not including the tools we need in our plans as a first step.
  9. Lack of emotional support: If your family and friends aren’t behind you, taking the time to work on your own projects can be a problem. Even under the best of circumstances, taking time for ourselves can feel selfish; this is made worse when the people around us don’t believe in us. Again, you need to explain how important this is to you, but also share your plan and involve the people close to you as much as possible. Also, be sure to pay some extra attention to them when you’re not working on your project. If you want the people around you to invest their support in you, you have to be willing to invest some attention in them.

    If the people around you are completely unwilling or unable to support you, the hard truth is, you’ve got to replace those people, or minimize their affect on you. You can’t get rid of your parents or children, so you need to make sure they’re criticism can’t affect you; everyone else needs to know that if they can’t support you, they can’t be a part of your life. This means making some hard choices, to be sure; it also means taking a good hard look at your own life to see why you’ve surrounded yourself with people who offer you only negativity.

  10. Fear of success: You’re afraid you might actually pull this off, and then what? Maybe you’re not prepared for the life that completing your project will create. For example, if you write a best-selling novel, you’ll be an “author”, and people will treat you differently. Or maybe you’re worried because the project might seem frivolous or out-of-character to your friends, family, or colleagues — what if someone at your law firm finds out you run a comic book business on the side? Or you might fear having to follow-up — if you make a brilliant short documentary, people will expect you to make more brilliant documentaries.

    The fear of success can be just as paralyzing as the fear of failure, and even worse, because a part of us knows it’s irrational. But undertaking any large project means accepting that our lives after might (or even “should”) be different than our lives now, and whether we like our lives now or not, it’s the life we know as opposed to the unknown life we might be creating.

    This is the trickiest issue on this list, because it’s so hard to wrap our heads around. Visualization might help — imagine your life after, the good things and the bad things that might happen if you complete your big project, and rework your plan to minimize the bad things. Rationally, we know most of the bad things won’t come about, but this is not really a rational fear, so knowing that doesn’t help. Instead, you need to reassure your irrational self that you’re taking measure to make sure the bad stuff can be avoided.

We live in a “Just Do It!” society, where the inability to get started is often seen as a moral failure — as laziness or stupidity. The danger of this is that when we find ourselves unable to get started on a project, we assume that it’s because something is wrong with us, and either give up or make excuses to protect our sense of self.

The reality is, moral failure usually has nothing to do with our inability to get a project off the ground. But because we’ve learned to see inability in moral terms, we rarely look clearly at what exactly we need to do to fix the things holding us back.

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Don’t fall into this trap. If you’ve been planning something that you just can’t seem to get moving, ask if one of the above problems applies to you, and fix it. Or, if you’re getting ready to start your planning, keep them in mind and make sure to consider all of them in the creation of your plan. Don’t put yourself into the situations above in the first place.

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Last Updated on October 30, 2018

How to Motivate Yourself: 13 Simple Ways You Can Try Right Now

How to Motivate Yourself: 13 Simple Ways You Can Try Right Now

Who needs Tony Robbins when you can motivate yourself? Overcoming the emotional hurdle to get stuff done when you’d rather sit on the couch isn’t always easy. But unless calling in sick and waking up at noon have no consequences for you, it’s often a must.

For those of you who never procrastinate, distract yourself or drag your feet when you should be doing something important, well done so far! But for the rest of you, it’s good to have a library of motivational boosters to move along.

Whether you’re starting a buisiness, trying to los weight or breaking a bad habit, you’ll learn how to motivate yourself with different techniques in this article.

13 Simple Ways to Motivate Yourself Right Now

Despite your best efforts, passion, habits and a flow-producing environment can fail. In that case, it’s time to find whatever emotional pump-up you can use to get started:

1. Go back to “why”

Focusing on a dull task doesn’t make it any more attractive. Zooming out and asking yourself why you are bothering in the first place will make it more appealing.

If you can’t figure out why, then there’s a good chance you shouldn’t bother with it in the first place.

2. Go for five

Start working for five minutes. Often that little push will be enough to get you going.

3. Move around

Get your body moving as you would if you were extremely motivated to do something. This ‘faking it’ approach to motivation may seem silly or crude but it works.

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4. Find the next step

If it seems impossible to work on a project for you, you can try to focus on the next immediate step.

Fighting an amorphous blob of work will only cause procrastination. Chunk it up so that it becomes manageable. Learn how to stop procrastinating in this guide.

5. Find your itch

What is keeping you from working? Don’t let the itch continue without isolating it and removing the problem.

Are you unmotivated because you feel overwhelmed, tired, afraid, bored, restless or angry? Maybe it is because you aren’t sure you have time or delegated tasks haven’t been finished yet?

6. Deconstruct your fears

I’m sure you don’t have a phobia about getting stuff done. But at the same time, hidden fears or anxieties can keep you from getting real work completed.

Isolate the unknowns and make yourself confident, you can handle the worst case scenario.

7. Get a partner

Find someone who will motivate you when you’re feeling lazy. I have a friend I go to the gym with. Besides spotting weight, having a friend can help motivate you to work hard when you’d normally quit.

8. Kickstart your day

Plan out tomorrow. Get up early and place all the important things early in the morning. Building momentum early in the day can usually carry you forward far later.

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Having a morning routine is a good idea for you to stay motivated!

9. Read books

Read not just self-help or motivational books but any book that has new ideas. New ideas get your mental gears turning and can build motivation. Here’re more reasons to read every day.

Learning new ideas puts your brain in motion so it requires less time to speed up to your tasks.

10. Get the right tools

Your environment can have a profound effect on your enthusiasm. Computers that are too slow, inefficient applications or a vehicle that breaks down constantly can kill your motivation.

Building motivation is almost as important as avoiding the traps that can stop it.

11. Be careful with the small problems

The worst killer of motivation is facing a seemingly small problem that creates endless frustration.

Reframe little problems that must be fixed as bigger ones or they will kill any drive you have.

12. Develop a mantra

Find a few statements that focus your mind and motivate you. It doesn’t matter whether they are pulled from a tacky motivational poster or just a few words to tell you what to do.

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If you aren’t sure where to start, a good personal mantra is “Do it now!” You can find more here too: 7 Empowering Affirmations That Will Help You Be Mentally Strong

13. Build on success

Success creates success. When you’ve just won, it is easy to feel motivated about almost anything. Emotions tend not to be situation specific, so a small win, whether it is a compliment from a colleague or finishing two thirds of your tasks before noon can turn you into a juggernaut.

There are many ways you can place small successes earlier on to spur motivation later. Structuring your to-do lists, placing straightforward tasks such as exercising early in the day or giving yourself an affirmation can do the trick.

How to Stay Motivated Forever (Without Motivation Tricks)

The best way to motivate yourself is to organize your life so you don’t have to. If work is a constant battle for you, perhaps it is time to start thinking about a new job. The idea is that explicit motivational techniques should be a backup, not your regular routine.

Here are some other things to consider making work flow more naturally:

Passion

Do things you have a passion for. We all have to do things we don’t want to. But if life has become a chronic source of dull chores, you’ve got a big problem that needs fixing.

Not sure what your passion is to get you motivated? This will help you:

How to Get Motivated and Be Happy Every Day When You Wake Up

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Habits

You can’t put everything on autopilot. I’ve found putting a few core habits in place creates a structure for the day.

Waking up at the same time, working at the same times and having a similar productive routine makes it easier to do the next day.

This guide will be useful for you if you’re looking to build good habits:

Understand Your Habits to Control Them 100%

Flow

Flow is the state where your mind is completely focused on the task at hand. While there are many factors that go into producing this state, having the right challenge level is a big part.

Find ways to tweak your tasks so they hover in that sweet spot between boredom and maddening frustration.

Easily distracted and hard to focus? Here’s your solution.

Final Thoughts

With all these tips I’ve shared with you, now you know what to do when you’re feeling unmotivated.

Find your passion and develop a positive mantra so when the next time negativity hits you again, you know how to stay positive and motivated!

Featured photo credit: Pexels via pexels.com

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