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Readers Respond: Your Stumbling Blocks

Readers Respond: Your Stumbling Blocks
Your Stumbling Blocks

About 10 days ago, I accidentally posted a question I had meant to schedule for later this month, and as I’m coming to expect, your responses really got me thinking. The question was simple: What one big productivity block do you most struggle to overcome? But the issue it raises — how can we keep ourselves on track? — is really complex, and speaks directly to why a site like lifehack.org exists and continues to attract a daily readership in the six figures.

We talk a lot about goals, motivation, and self-development. All of these things share a common root: desire. The desire to fulfill our destinies, maybe, or to attain for ourselves something that’s missing, whether that’s security, luxury, meaning, or even just a sense of completion and closure.

Planning our own absence

But things get in the way of us attaining the things we desire. Sometimes those things are external factors — a harsh government, a poor economy, bad business choices by our employers. But much of the time, what keeps us from fulfilling our desires is internal. Some things we have no control over — health problems, for instance. Boris left a particularly touching comment last week:

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I do a very good job at managing most activities related to my business. However, no matter how well I planned… I have chronic health problems that get in the way very often.

I don’t have chronic health problems, but even something as simple as a cold or a toothache can derail all my planning and send me into a tailspin of depression and self-doubt — I can only imagine what it must be like to experience that on a regular basis.

The thing with health issues is that, although we can work really hard to keep ourselves fit, we are always under the threat of a sudden flare-up, whether of a chronic illness or a new infection or injury. No matter how much we tell ourselves that we are captains of our own destinies, our bodies can betray us, laying us low in a matter of moments.

The answer to this lies, I think, in planning. I’ve been strongly inspired by Tim Ferriss’ book The 4-Hour Work Week. Ferriss devotes a large part of the book to describing systems that continue to work even when we’re not there to run them. The point, for Ferriss, is to allow us the time to gallivant around the globe in search of tango lessons or extreme sporting events (or, I suppose, enlightenment), but the lesson applies to those of us worried about a sudden illness knocking us out of commission for a week, a month, or a year. Set up systems that require as little attention as possible, so you can commit your time to activities that serve your self — whether that means spending six months seeking the latest thrill or six months recovering from an injury.

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Strengths, Focus, and Vision

There are also internal forces that act as stumbling blocks that we do have some degree of control over, or that are within our power to change. Tom Gray says his biggest stumbling block is not playing to his own strengths:

I spend too much time working on things that would be better delegated or farmed out and not enough time in activities where I shine.

Kevin X says he struggles to maintain focus, keeping his attention on the things he’s doing instead of the things he wants to do when he’s done:

When I am on one project, I start to think about another. When I move on to a new part of the day, I find myself thinking about something in the past. Even when I am trying to sleep (the best time of the day) my mind wanders so much and I think of great new ideas (which I have to quickly write down) or of the past day and the next day.

And gstar writes of the importance — and difficulty — of keeping one’s vision in mind:

maintaining the “big picture” of where you are ultimately trying to go. I’ve heard it said, “Take care of the details, and the rest will take care of itself” – How do you narrow down what those details are, while not losing track of the overall goal?

What these three things have in common is a lack of self-reflection — taking the time to sit down with one’s self and really thinking about who one is and what one should be doing. This is, I realize, a tall order, and one that Western society, at least, doesn’t make much space for.

Which is why it’s so crucial that we make that space ourselves, that we insist on the time to explore our own needs and desires. This isn’t touchy-feely, hippie stuff — this is what it takes for us to realize our fullest potential, and in that light, it’s what makes us human. We need time to figure out what are strengths are and how best to develop and use them, time to make sure that the things we are doing are really the best use of our time, and time to see our lives in the big-picture view so we can work out where we’re headed and why we’re headed that way.

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I think it’s telling that virtually every productivity guru, every organization coach, and every successful leader advocates some sort of ritualized self-awareness time, whether that’s a yearly retreat, daily quiet time, or a weekly review. What they don’t tend to say is how hard it is to really think about this stuff! To discover your strengths it’s necessary also to think about your weaknesses, about ways you can improve, about things you’ve done wrong and things you need to do better. To think about your vision it’s necessary to escape all the myriad demands on us to perform, produce, and prepare. To really focus we need to have something worth focusing on — and finding that special thing can be a lifelong calling.

Instead, we procrastinate. Marina says, “[My stumbling block] is always waiting until a “better” time to write that book/blog post, launch that program, etc.” Brian Yuong says, “Any time I hit a complex section of a project my mind tells me I could be more productive if I shift to another project that has been on the back burner for awhile.” Tracey says, “I put off things that I find unpleasant, such as returning phone calls, and in doing so make tasks much more difficult than if I’d just done them in a timely manner…” And on and on.

Why are so many of us working on things that either don’t make best use of our strengths, don’t engage us enough to hold our attention, or don’t advance us towards any vision of what our lives should be like? I realize there are things we have to do to pay the bills, take care of our responsibilities to family, friends, and society, or just get through from day to day, but they shouldn’t be the majority of our actions!

We need to take these moments of hesitation, these “procrastinable” tasks, as warning signs that we’re running off-track — or, worse, stalled out. And when too much of our lives is pushed to the “back burner”, we need to see that for what it is: as a sign that change is necessary.

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For most of us, that doesn’t mean shaving our heads and running off to Angola to herd sheep. It means making time — not finding it, but making it — to recapture our strengths, focus, and vision. Figure out one thing that needs to change, and change it. Repeat as necessary, until life is on the front burner.

More by this author

Becoming Self-Taught (The How-To Guide) The Science of Setting Goals (And Its Effect on Your Brain) Is Procrastination Bad? The Truth About Procrastination Revealed How to Take Notes: 3 Effective Note-Taking Techniques Back to Basics: Capture Your Ideas

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1 8 Steps to Continuous Self Motivation Even During the Difficult Times 2 Why Being A Perfectionist May Not Be So Perfect 3 Becoming Self-Taught (The How-To Guide) 4 How to Break Out of Your Comfort Zone 5 The Science of Setting Goals (And Its Effect on Your Brain)

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Last Updated on May 12, 2020

8 Steps to Continuous Self Motivation Even During the Difficult Times

8 Steps to Continuous Self Motivation Even During the Difficult Times

Many of us find ourselves in motivational slumps that we have to work to get out of. Sometimes it’s like a continuous cycle where we are motivated for a period of time, fall out and then have to build things back up again.

There is nothing more powerful for self-motivation than the right attitude. You can’t choose or control your circumstance, but you can choose your attitude towards your circumstances.

How I see this working is while you’re developing these mental steps, and utilizing them regularly, self-motivation will come naturally when you need it.

The key, for me, is hitting the final step to Share With Others. It can be somewhat addictive and self-motivating when you help others who are having trouble.

A good way to have self motivation continuously is to implement something like these 8 steps from Ian McKenzie.[1] I enjoyed Ian’s article but thought it could use some definition when it comes to trying to build a continuous drive of motivation. Here is a new list on how to self motivate:

1. Start Simple

Keep motivators around your work area – things that give you that initial spark to get going.

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These motivators will be the Triggers that remind you to get going.

2. Keep Good Company

Make more regular encounters with positive and motivated people. This could be as simple as IM chats with peers or a quick discussion with a friend who likes sharing ideas.

Positive and motivated people are very different from the negative ones. They will help you grow and see opportunities during tough times.

Here’re more reasons why you should avoid negative people: 10 Reasons Why You Should Avoid Negative People

3. Keep Learning

Read and try to take in everything you can. The more you learn, the more confident you become in starting projects.

You can train yourself to crave lifelong learning with these tips: How to Develop a Lifelong Learning Habit

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4. See the Good in Bad

When encountering obstacles or challenging goals, you want to be in the habit of finding what works to get over them.

Here are 10 tips to make positive thinking easy.

5. Stop Thinking

Just do. If you find motivation for a particular project lacking, try getting started on something else. Something trivial even, then you’ll develop the momentum to begin the more important stuff.

When you’re thinking and worrying about it too much, you’re just wasting time. These tried worry busting techniques can help you.

6. Know Yourself

Keep notes on when your motivation sucks and when you feel like a superstar. There will be a pattern that, once you are aware of, you can work around and develop.

Read for yourself how the magic of marking down your mood works.

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7. Track Your Progress

Keep a tally or a progress bar for ongoing projects. When you see something growing, you will always want to nurture it.

Take a look at these 4 simple ways to track your progress so you have motivation to achieve your goals.

8. Help Others

Share your ideas and help friends get motivated. Seeing others do well will motivate you to do the same. Write about your success and get feedback from readers.

Helping others actually helps yourself, here’s why.

What I would hope happens here is you will gradually develop certain skills that become motivational habits.

Once you get to the stage where you are regularly helping others keep motivated – be it with a blog or talking with peers – you’ll find the cycle continuing where each facet of staying motivated is refined and developed.

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Too Many Steps?

If you could only take one step? Just do it!

Once you get started on something, you’ll almost always just get into it and keep going. There will be times when you have to do things you really don’t want to: that’s where the other steps and tips from other writers come in handy.

However, the most important thing, that I think is worth repeating, is to just get started.

Get that momentum going and then when you need to, take Ian’s Step 7 and Take A Break. No one wants to work all the time!

More Tips for Boosting Motivation

Featured photo credit: Japheth Mast via unsplash.com

Reference

[1] Ian McKenzie: 8 mental steps to self-motivation

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