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How to Get Gutsy

How to Get Gutsy
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    “If you wanna run with the big dogs, you’ve gotta get off the porch.” This was the sage advice given to me some years ago as I considered my first entrepreneurial venture. You’ve got to take risks. Be gutsy. All of which led me to wonder what guts really is. And, more importantly, if you don’t have it, can you get it?

    What is “gutsyness?”

    According to the American Heritage Dictionary, Guts (in our context) is…

    1. Courage; fortitude.
    2. Nerve; audacity.

    To me, “guts” translates to a willingness and ability to embrace risk. What kind of risk?

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    • Risk of trying and failing
    • Risk of exposing your true-self and being judged
    • Risk of losing status, time and money
    • Risk of injury or death, and
    • Risk of…succeeding at whatever it is you are attempting

    Looking at the above list, it’s pretty clear there are activities that require you to take risks that, addressed and embraced, are constructive and have the potential to add to your life. These would include turning a deep interest into a profession, introducing yourself to a potential mentor, client, partner or lover, writing a book or creating a painting for public display.

    Other activities, though, are substantially more likely to require risks that are likely to take away from the quality of your life. Those would be actions that place you in peril. And, while, occasionally justified by extreme circumstances, my focus is more on the willingness to take the day-to-day risks with the potential to enhance your life.

    Guts and genes

    Who hasn’t been in a scenario where you wished you had the guts to do something, but just couldn’t get it together to try? We tend to blame ourselves for “wimping out,” but interestingly enough, a solid chunk of gutsyness is not learned or conditioned, it’s genetic.

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    According to Jungian theory, we all have innate personality preferences or types. If you have kids or know anyone with kids, this is readily apparent. Two kids from the same parents literally come out of the womb with radically different personalities, temperaments and preferences.

    Seeking to create a usable tool to identify genetic personality preferences some 60-years ago, Katharine Cook Briggs and Isabel Briggs Myers created their Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI®). This tool allows you to determine your innate personality preferences. Indeed, you can even take variations of the MBTI® test online today. Give it a shot, it’ll only take 10 minutes. Then, see how close the results come to revealing your deep, dark secret personality traits.

    I was blown away when I took mine. Part of my profile reveals a strong tendency toward introversion, which, for those who have known me for years, is not surprising. But, for those who know me only through business, it’s pretty shocking, since I make my living largely in the public eye.

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    So, genetics plays a strong role in your preference to take the various risk involved in being gutsy. And, according to most, there’s not a whole lot we can do to change that. But, another chunk of gustiness is actually not inherited, but learned.

    Guts and environment

    While we arrive on this planet with a certain attitudes about risk, our interactions, relationships and experiences as we go through life also play a major role in molding just how gutsy we are. The more we risk stepping out of our genetic comfort zones, the more opportunities we have to “learn” about the benefits of being gutsier and then “choose” to take those same actions again in an attempt to get those same feelings that came from our adventure in gutsyland.

    Which begs the question…

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    If you didn’t inherit the gutsy-gene, what can you do about it?

    First, you’ve got to ask yourself, “if I’m not too gutsy, do I really need to change?” The short answer is, it depends. A certain aversion to the risk of injury or death is natural and good. It stops you from being reckless.

    But, if you have an irrational fear of injury, death, judgment, failure or embarrassment or simply an aversion to risk that stops you from participating in the everyday joys of life, that needs attention. Similarly, a certain amount of caution in social situations is fine, but when it engenders a level of fear that stops you from doing things that would add genuine joy to your life, it’s time to do something about it.

    Here’s a three-step approach that’s gone a long way toward moving me past my natural tendency toward introversion and contemplation to regularly taking fairly major risks, both personal and business.

    1. Visualize gutsy action and success. Twice a day, visualize engaging in the activity that would require guts and then succeeding wildly. Make it as vivid and detailed as possible. Use all of your senses. Over time, this really helps to alleviate the anxiety/fear that holds you back. Through repetition, you tend to desensitize your fears and anxieties, while simultaneously reinforcing your belief that, should you take a gutsy action, you will succeed.
    2. Take incremental action. Pick a situation that gives you the opportunity to confront one of your fear-inducers in a controlled, supported, incremental and gentle manner. For example, if you have a fear of speaking in front of people, commit to a small weekly gathering of friends and begin speaking up, rather than scheduling a 20-minute presentation in front of your entire company. Then, begin to commit to events/actions that will allow you to confront your fear in increasingly more exposed situations. This process lets you experience serial success, builds confidence and gets you “incrementally gutsy” over time.
    3. Rinse and repeat. The more-often you engage in this process and succeed, the more you’ll believe in your ability to succeed and the more willing you’ll become to step out of your box.

    Share your experiences, stories and other techniques to help make the transition from gutless to gutsy.

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    Last Updated on January 2, 2019

    7 Steps For Making a New Year’s Resolution and Keeping It

    7 Steps For Making a New Year’s Resolution and Keeping It

    Are you keen to reinvent yourself this year? Or at least use the new year as a long overdue excuse to get rid of bad habits or pick up new ones?

    Yes, it’s that time of year again. The time of year when we feel as if we have to turn over a new leaf. The time when we misguidedly imagine that the arrival of a new year will magically provide the catalyst, motivation and persistence we need to reinvent ourselves.

    Traditionally, New Year’s Day is styled as the ideal time to kick start a new phase in your life and the time when you must make your all important new year’s resolution. Unfortunately, the beginning of the year is also one of the worst times to make a major change in your habits because it’s often a relatively stressful time, right in the middle of the party and vacation season.

    Don’t set yourself up for failure this year by vowing to make huge changes that will be hard to keep. Instead follow these seven steps for successfully making a new year’s resolution you can stick to for good.

    1. Just pick one thing

    If you want to change your life or your lifestyle don’t try to change the whole thing at once. It won’t work. Instead pick one area of your life to change to begin with.

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    Make it something concrete so you know exactly what change you’re planning to make. If you’re successful with the first change you can go ahead and make another change after a month or so. By making small changes one after the other, you still have the chance to be a whole new you at the end of the year and it’s a much more realistic way of doing it.

    Don’t pick a New Year’s resolution that’s bound to fail either, like running a marathon if you’re 40lbs overweight and get out of breath walking upstairs. If that’s the case resolve to walk every day. When you’ve got that habit down pat you can graduate to running in short bursts, constant running by March or April and a marathon at the end of the year. What’s the one habit you most want to change?

    2. Plan ahead

    To ensure success you need to research the change you’re making and plan ahead so you have the resources available when you need them. Here are a few things you should do to prepare and get all the systems in place ready to make your change.

    Read up on it – Go to the library and get books on the subject. Whether it’s quitting smoking, taking up running or yoga or becoming vegan there are books to help you prepare for it. Or use the Internet. If you do enough research you should even be looking forward to making the change.

    Plan for success – Get everything ready so things will run smoothly. If you’re taking up running make sure you have the trainers, clothes, hat, glasses, ipod loaded with energetic sounds at the ready. Then there can be no excuses.

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    3. Anticipate problems

    There will be problems so make a list of what they’ll be. If you think about it, you’ll be able to anticipate problems at certain times of the day, with specific people or in special situations. Once you’ve identified the times that will probably be hard work out ways to cope with them when they inevitably crop up.

    4. Pick a start date

    You don’t have to make these changes on New Year’s Day. That’s the conventional wisdom, but if you truly want to make changes then pick a day when you know you’ll be well-rested, enthusiastic and surrounded by positive people. I’ll be waiting until my kids go back to school in February.

    Sometimes picking a date doesn’t work. It’s better to wait until your whole mind and body are fully ready to take on the challenge. You’ll know when it is when the time comes.

    5. Go for it

    On the big day go for it 100%. Make a commitment and write it down on a card. You just need one short phrase you can carry in your wallet. Or keep it in your car, by your bed and on your bathroom mirror too for an extra dose of positive reinforcement.

    Your commitment card will say something like:

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    • I enjoy a clean, smoke-free life.
    • I stay calm and in control even under times of stress.
    • I’m committed to learning how to run my own business.
    • I meditate daily.

    6. Accept failure

    If you do fail and sneak a cigarette, miss a walk or shout at the kids one morning don’t hate yourself for it. Make a note of the triggers that caused this set back and vow to learn a lesson from them.

    If you know that alcohol makes you crave cigarettes and oversleep the next day cut back on it. If you know the morning rush before school makes you shout then get up earlier or prepare things the night before to make it easier on you.

    Perseverance is the key to success. Try again, keep trying and you will succeed.

    7. Plan rewards

    Small rewards are great encouragement to keep you going during the hardest first days. After that you can probably reward yourself once a week with a magazine, a long-distance call to a supportive friend, a siesta, a trip to the movies or whatever makes you tick.

    Later you can change the rewards to monthly and then at the end of the year you can pick an anniversary reward. Something that you’ll look forward to. You deserve it and you’ll have earned it.

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    Whatever your plans and goals are for this year, I’d do wish you luck with them but remember, it’s your life and you make your own luck.

    Decide what you want to do this year, plan how to get it and go for it. I’ll definitely be cheering you on.

    Are you planning to make a New Year’s resolution? What is it and is it something you’ve tried to do before or something new?

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