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How to Fail at Practically Anything

How to Fail at Practically Anything
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How to Fail at Practically Anything

    I say, fail a lot. Push yourself to the limits of your talents, endurance, and common sense, and then go one step further and fall down, spectacularly if possible. Failure is one of life’s great forces; it’s driven far more innovation than talent, creativity, or necessity combined. Plus, its stories are better.

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    Most people, of course, avoid failure. Or, at least, they try to, as much as possible. Or, even worse, they deny having failed and push on steadily against increasing odds just to show ‘em they mean business. What good comes of that? What lessons has success ever taught?

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    Pick a skill, any skill: let’s say, tightrope walking. Imagine the first time you approach the cable stretched taught out in front of you, you close your eyes, stick out your hands, and walk to the other side. The next time, same thing. And the next. You are, it seems, amazingly gifted at walking across thin cables suspended high above the ground. How’s that make you feel? Have you learned anything? Should I admire you? Do you even admire yourself? Or are you bored, having found tight-rope walking to be as easy (easier, in fact) as falling down? And where do you go from there?

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    No, it’s the failures we face, large and small — and the way we face them — that make us who we are and give us the opportunity to make ourselves better. How we fail is at least as important as how we succeed. With that in mind, here are a few thoughts on failing, drawn from my own vast experience:

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    • Fail with grace. There’s no point failing if you’re going to go screaming and crying into the night. When failure is imminent, cut your losses; don’t fool yourself into thinking everything’s fine, or that you have to “see things through to the bitter end”. Don’t pull others down with you– and that means, don’t waste time pointing fingers. Own your failure. Take responsibility for the mess you’ve made, and for cleaning it up.
    • Have a Plan B. When their first attempts to contact the governments of Earth failed, did the aliens of Space Station 7 go down with their saucers? No, they pulled out Plan 9 and entered movie-making history! No plan is failure-proof; embracing failure means accepting the risks you’re taking and being prepared for the worst.
    • Forgive and relive. Review the events that led up to failure. What did you miss? What could you have done differently? While blaming others is hardly productive, if your trust in others was misplaced, consider what led you to put your trust in them in the first place.
    • Get perspective. Tell an outsider your story, someone you trust to tell you what a knee-biter you are. Ask what they would have done differently, and what advice they’d give you if you were just setting out on your failure.
    • Stop doing that! My dad used to tell me, “Insanity is when you do the same thing over and over, hoping for different results.” Once you’ve identified your mistakes, make an effort to avoid them in the future. I know this sounds like plain common sense, but like they say, common sense isn’t common. Think of all the times you’ve seen someone go through an awful breakup only to take up with a new boyfriend or girlfriend with the same faults as the one they just dumped.
    • Do something. Fail actively; don’t give up and stand like a deer in the road, vacant-eyed, watching the headlights overtake you.

    Failure is the most important learning tool we humans have at our disposal. But if we merely accept failure and move on, we may as well not have failed at all. Instead, we should embrace our failures, milking them for everything they’re worth. Ask yourself what you can take away from your failures, what you’re being given by them.

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    In the end, it is only by embracing failure that we achieve success. In many cases, not to fail is, in itself, a failure. Did I just blow your mind? Or have I failed?

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    Last Updated on November 18, 2020

    15 Tips to Restart the Exercise Habit (and How to Keep It)

    15 Tips to Restart the Exercise Habit (and How to Keep It)
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    It’s okay, you can finally admit it. It’s been two months since you’ve seen the inside of the gym. Getting sick, family crisis, overtime at work and school papers that needed to get finished all kept you for exercising. Now, the question is: how do you start again?
    Once you have an exercise habit, it becomes automatic. You just go to the gym, there is no force involved. But after a month, two months or possibly a year off, it can be hard to get started again. Here are some tips to climb back on that treadmill after you’ve fallen off.

    1. Don’t Break the Habit – The easiest way to keep things going is simply not to stop. Avoid long breaks in exercising or rebuilding the habit will take some effort. This may be advice a little too late for some people. But if you have an exercise habit going, don’t drop it at the first sign of trouble.
    2. Reward Showing Up – Woody Allen once said that, “Half of life is showing up.” I’d argue that 90% of making a habit is just making the effort to get there. You can worry about your weight, amount of laps you run or the amount you can bench press later.
    3. Commit for Thirty Days – Make a commitment to go every day (even just for 20 minutes) for one month. This will solidify the exercise habit. By making a commitment you also take pressure off yourself in the first weeks back of deciding whether to go.
    4. Make it Fun – If you don’t enjoy yourself at the gym, it is going to be hard to keep it a habit. There are thousands of ways you can move your body and exercise, so don’t give up if you’ve decided lifting weights or doing crunches isn’t for you. Many large fitness centers will offer a range of programs that can suit your tastes.
    5. Schedule During Quiet Hours – Don’t put exercise time in a place where it will easily be pushed aside by something more important. Right after work or first thing in the morning are often good places to put it. Lunch-hour workouts might be too easy to skip if work demands start mounting.
    6. Get a Buddy – Grab a friend to join you. Having a social aspect to exercising can boost your commitment to the exercise habit.
    7. X Your Calendar – One person I know has the habit of drawing a red “X” through any day on the calendar he goes to the gym. The benefit of this is it quickly shows how long it has been since you’ve gone to the gym. Keeping a steady amount of X’s on your calendar is an easy way to motivate yourself.
    8. Enjoyment Before Effort – After you finish any work out, ask yourself what parts you enjoyed and what parts you did not. As a rule, the enjoyable aspects of your workout will get done and the rest will be avoided. By focusing on how you can make workouts more enjoyable, you can make sure you want to keep going to the gym.
    9. Create a Ritual – Your workout routine should become so ingrained that it becomes a ritual. This means that the time of day, place or cue automatically starts you towards grabbing your bag and heading out. If your workout times are completely random, it will be harder to benefit from the momentum of a ritual.
    10. Stress Relief – What do you do when your stressed? Chances are it isn’t running. But exercise can be a great way to relieve stress, releasing endorphin which will improve your mood. The next time you feel stressed or tired, try doing an exercise you enjoy. When stress relief is linked to exercise, it is easy to regain the habit even after a leave of absence.
    11. Measure Fitness – Weight isn’t always the best number to track. Increase in muscle can offset decreases in fat so the scale doesn’t change even if your body is. But fitness improvements are a great way to stay motivated. Recording simple numbers such as the number of push-ups, sit-ups or speed you can run can help you see that the exercise is making you stronger and faster.
    12. Habits First, Equipment Later – Fancy equipment doesn’t create a habit for exercise. Despite this, some people still believe that buying a thousand dollar machine will make up for their inactivity. It won’t. Start building the exercise habit first, only afterwards should you worry about having a personal gym.
    13. Isolate Your Weakness – If falling off the exercise wagon is a common occurrence for you, find out why. Do you not enjoy exercising? Is it a lack of time? Is it feeling self-conscious at the gym? Is it a lack of fitness know-how? As soon as you can isolate your weakness, you can make steps to improve the situation.
    14. Start Small – Trying to run fifteen miles your first workout isn’t a good way to build a habit. Work below your capacity for the first few weeks to build the habit. Otherwise you might scare yourself off after a brutal workout.
    15. Go for Yourself, Not to Impress – Going to the gym with the only goal of looking great is like starting a business with only the goal to make money. The effort can’t justify the results. But if you go to the gym to push yourself, gain energy and have a good time, then you can keep going even when results are slow.

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