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An Interview with Your Favorite Person – Yourself

An Interview with Your Favorite Person – Yourself
Mirror - Interview

    When was the last time you had a good conversation with yourself? I mean a full-on, I’m a crazy person, talking out loud, discussion with yourself?

    You actually talk to yourself all the time. Most of it is subconscious, and a lot of it is negative and cautionary. But what about taking the time to really ask yourself some serious questions?

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    The Interview

    It’s our very nature to think of ourselves first. Often, we do for others, but it’s important to look out for our own dreams and goals.

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    Good interviewers ask basic questions. Great interviewers ask poignant questions, those that get to the real soul of the person. We usually think we know ourselves pretty well. To really get to know yourself – your hopes, dreams, fears – you have to ask. I know it sounds crazy, but it works.

    Set aside some time when you won’t be disturbed. Put on some music – something calming. Get out some paper and a pen, and begin interviewing yourself. You can also use a voice recorder, but a computer may hinder the process. It may be too tempting to fire up your browser or IM client in the middle of the discussion. I mean, you’re talking to yourself, and you don’t mind. But stick to paper and pen or a recorder.

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    Then just start asking and answering questions – out loud. This is why you should be alone. You don’t want someone calling the asylum on you. You’re going to feel stupid and you’re going to feel weird. That’s okay and natural.

    Just ask and answer – really do it right. Think of it as for a podcast or TV morning show. The better the questions, the more reflective you get, and the more insightful the answers.

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    The subject can be specific, or all over the place. This is your interview and the ultimate goal is to really get to know who you are today. It’s too common to assume we are the same person we were a year ago, or 10 years ago.

    By taking some time to talk to yourself, you can move through blocks that hinder your productivity, financial situation, and outlook. It’s one of the best ways to get to know the person closest to you – the real you.

    Tony D. Clark writes, draws cartoons, designs software and websites, and spends a lot of time talking others into working from home, being creative, and doing what they love. His blog Success from the Nest helps people to design and run a home-based business that is in line with their unique gifts, values, personality, and world-view – all served up with humor and cartoons.

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    Last Updated on September 17, 2018

    Why Do I Have Bad Luck? 2 Simple Things to Change Your Destiny

    Why Do I Have Bad Luck? 2 Simple Things to Change Your Destiny

    Are you one of those people who are always suffering setbacks? Does little ever seem to go right for you? Do you sometimes feel that the universe is out to get you? Do you wonder:

    Why do I have bad luck?

    Let me let you into a secret:

    Your luck is no worse—and no better—than anyone else’s. It just feels that way. Better still, there are two simple things you can do which will reverse your feelings of being unlucky.

    1. Stop believing that what happens in your life is down to the vagaries of luck, destiny, supernatural forces, malevolent other people, or anything else outside your self.

    Psychologists call this “external locus of control.” It’s a kind of fatalism, where people believe that they can do little or nothing personally to change their lives.

    Because of this, they either merely hope for the best, focus on trying to change their luck by various kinds of superstition, or submit passively to whatever comes—while complaining that it doesn’t match their hopes.

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    Most successful people take the opposite view. They have “internal locus of control.” They believe that what happens in their life is nearly all down to them; and that even when chance events occur, what is important is not the event itself, but how you respond to it.

    This makes them pro-active, engaged, ready to try new things, and keen to find the means to change whatever in their lives they don’t like.

    They aren’t fatalistic and they don’t blame bad luck for what isn’t right in their world. They look for a way to make things better.

    Are they luckier than the others? Of course not.

    Luck is random—that’s what chance means—so they are just as likely to suffer setbacks as anyone else.

    What’s different is their response. When things go wrong, they quickly look for ways to put them right. They don’t whine, pity themselves, or complain about “bad luck.” They try to learn from what happened to avoid or correct it next time and get on with living their life as best they can.

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    No one is habitually luckier or unluckier than anyone else. It may seem so, over the short term (Random events often come in groups, just as random numbers often lie close together for several instances—which is why gamblers tend to see patterns where none exist).

    When you take a longer perspective, random chance is just . . . random. Yet those who feel that they are less lucky, typically pay far more attention to short-term instances of bad luck, convincing themselves of the correctness of their belief.

    Your locus of control isn’t genetic. You learned it somehow. If it isn’t working for you, change it.

    2. Remember that whatever you pay attention to grows in your mind.

    If you focus on what’s going wrong in your life—especially if you see it as “bad luck” you can do nothing about—it will seem blacker and more malevolent.

    In a short time, you’ll become so convinced that everything is against you that you’ll notice more and more instances where this appears to be true. As a result, you will almost certainly stop trying, convinced that nothing you can do will improve your prospects.

    Fatalism feeds on itself until people become passive “victims” of life’s blows. The “losers” in life are those who are convinced they will fail before they start anything; sure that their “bad luck” will ruin any prospects of success.

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    They rarely notice that the true reasons for their failure are ignorance, laziness, lack of skill, lack of forethought, or just plain foolishness—all of which they could do something to correct, if only they would stop blaming other people or “bad luck” for their personal deficiencies.

    Your attention is under your control. Send it where you want it to go. Starve the negative thoughts until they die.

    To improve your fortune, first decide that what happens is nearly always down to you; then try focusing on what works and what turns out well, not the bad stuff.

    Your “fate” really does depend on the choices that you make. When random events happen, as they always will, do you choose to try to turn them to your advantage or just complain about them?

    Thomas Jefferson is said to have used these words:

    “I’m a great believer in luck and I find the harder I work, the more I have of it.”

    Ralph Waldo Emerson said:

    “Shallow men believe in luck. Strong men believe in cause and effect.”

    Your luck, in the end, is pretty much what you choose it to be.

    Featured photo credit: LoboStudio Hamburg via unsplash.com

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