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8 Good Reasons to Be a Lousy Musician

8 Good Reasons to Be a Lousy Musician

8 Goo Reasons to Be a Crappy Musician

    I’m a crappy guitarist. In the 20 years that I’ve been playing, I can’t once remember playing scales, and I’ve never sat down to "practice". I still have trouble with F-chords, I have awful right-hand technique, and my tempo has been known to swing from too fast to too slow without ever hitting "just right".

    I wouldn’t give it up for the world.

    See, I realized a long time ago that I wasn’t going to be a Famous Rock Star, or even a semi-locally-famous folky. That dream I have where Ronnie’s down for the count and I have to fill in on-stage with the Rolling Stones — and we’re going on in 5 minutes! — would always be just a dream (thankfully).

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    That realization freed me to stop trying to be cool and to just enjoy playing, and to this day my guitar is the one thing I own that I would consider going into a burning building for. Playing guitar has stopped being something I do for everyone else (even if they weren’t listening) and has become one of the few things I do simply for the sheer enjoyment of it.

    You, too, should be a lousy musician

    Everyone should have at least one thing in their life that they do for no other reason than that they enjoy it. As it turns out, though, it’s harder to do things for their own sake than it would seem! Collectors dream about the Big Find that will make them rich, writers dream of the best selling novel that will get them on Oprah, crafters and handy types think about how much money they’re saving on gifts and household necessities — and musicians dream about their big break with the Rolling Stones.

    To be able to revel in an activity that you’re not all that good at and that you don’t care that you’re not all that good at, to strive for and embrace mediocrity in some area of our lives, that’s a hard thing for a lot of us to do.

    But it’s worth it. Here are eight things I get out of being a crappy guitarist:

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    C) There’s no pressure.

    If i never get even the tiniest bit better than I am right now, it won’t matter. Nobody’s life, freedom, or even happiness depends on how well (or poorly) I play "Rocky Raccoon". Whether I improve or don’t improve is totally irrelevant to anything or anyone but me.

    D) It creates a social bond between myself and others.

    I’ve met thousands of other crappy guitarists over the course of my life, and a few great ones. Being a guitarist myself creates a connection between us, gives us something to talk about. Guitarists are always giving each other little gifts — showing each other how to play a tricky part of a song, teaching each other new chords or new ways to make old chords, sharing licks and riffs with each other.

    And, of course, non-musicians are always interested in the fact that I play. It gives them something to talk to me about (apparently my knowledge of early Cold War government sponsorship of social scientific research doesn’t give them much to hold onto!) and, of course, it is mildly entertaining for them to hear me play.

    E) It creates a social bond between other people.

    I carried an acoustic guitar with me all over Europe for a year, keeping it under my bed in hostel after hostel, carting it in it’s heavy reinforced case from town to town on busses and trains, dragging it through the streets of Paris, Prague, Budapest, and Amsterdam. And I’m glad I did.

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    Not just because playing in hostels and on park benches helped me make friends, but because it helped the people around me make friends. Once a roomful of travelers have sung "American Pie" at the top of their lungs together (badly), the ice is pretty much broken. People start interacting, because nothing can make them feel any more self-conscious.

    F) I get immediate gratification.

    I pick up a guitar, finger a chord, and strum, and music comes out. What could be more rewarding? I play, music happens. Instantly.

    And if I try something tricky, I can hear on the spot whether it worked or not. If I’m trying to figure out a song, I’ll try all manner of different things, until suddenly I hit the strings a few times and the song I’m trying to learn starts coming out.

    G) I’ve developed a new appreciation of music. 

    Because I’m always listening to music with an ear towards learning how to play it, I’ve become adept at working out how the different pieces fit together, and what makes each of them work, apart and together.

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    Aside from the increased formal appreciation of usic, I’ve also become much more appreciative of the work that a musician has to do to make a song work. Songs I might have — heck, <em>did</em> — totally dismissed at one point I listen to quite seriously today, because I know how difficult it is to make even a bad song.

    A) Playing music creates mindfulness.

    Guitar playing is, for me, a kind of meditation. There have been too many time to count when, looking for a moment’s distraction, I’ve ended up playing for hours. When you’re playing, your attention is (usually) focused entirely on the here and now, the unfolding of notes and chords into melodies and, ultimately, songs. This kind of mindfulness means I’m living entirely in the present, even if  just for a few moments — a skill that most of us, with our crazy lives and hectic schedules, have a hard time cultivating.

    B) It’s relaxing.

    Just listening to music is often enough to help ease the stress of our day-to-day lives; making music is a thousand times more effective (as long as you’re not worrying about how you’ll deal with your groupies after you’ve broken big on MTV). The combination of mindfulness and almost willful mediocrity lets me ease up on myself and just be for a little while, clearing my head and soothing the tensions that build up over the course of the day.

    C) It’s just for me.

    Finally, playing music is something that I do solely because it makes me happy. While I can and do share my playing with others, in the end I play for entirely selfish reasons: because I feel like it.

    What are you lousy at?

    I think everyone should be lousy at something they love. What do you do that you simply don’t care if you ever get any better at it, that you do just because it pleases you to do it? Let us know!

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    Last Updated on September 17, 2018

    Why Do I Have Bad Luck? 2 Simple Things to Change Your Destiny

    Why Do I Have Bad Luck? 2 Simple Things to Change Your Destiny

    Are you one of those people who are always suffering setbacks? Does little ever seem to go right for you? Do you sometimes feel that the universe is out to get you? Do you wonder:

    Why do I have bad luck?

    Let me let you into a secret:

    Your luck is no worse—and no better—than anyone else’s. It just feels that way. Better still, there are two simple things you can do which will reverse your feelings of being unlucky.

    1. Stop believing that what happens in your life is down to the vagaries of luck, destiny, supernatural forces, malevolent other people, or anything else outside your self.

    Psychologists call this “external locus of control.” It’s a kind of fatalism, where people believe that they can do little or nothing personally to change their lives.

    Because of this, they either merely hope for the best, focus on trying to change their luck by various kinds of superstition, or submit passively to whatever comes—while complaining that it doesn’t match their hopes.

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    Most successful people take the opposite view. They have “internal locus of control.” They believe that what happens in their life is nearly all down to them; and that even when chance events occur, what is important is not the event itself, but how you respond to it.

    This makes them pro-active, engaged, ready to try new things, and keen to find the means to change whatever in their lives they don’t like.

    They aren’t fatalistic and they don’t blame bad luck for what isn’t right in their world. They look for a way to make things better.

    Are they luckier than the others? Of course not.

    Luck is random—that’s what chance means—so they are just as likely to suffer setbacks as anyone else.

    What’s different is their response. When things go wrong, they quickly look for ways to put them right. They don’t whine, pity themselves, or complain about “bad luck.” They try to learn from what happened to avoid or correct it next time and get on with living their life as best they can.

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    No one is habitually luckier or unluckier than anyone else. It may seem so, over the short term (Random events often come in groups, just as random numbers often lie close together for several instances—which is why gamblers tend to see patterns where none exist).

    When you take a longer perspective, random chance is just . . . random. Yet those who feel that they are less lucky, typically pay far more attention to short-term instances of bad luck, convincing themselves of the correctness of their belief.

    Your locus of control isn’t genetic. You learned it somehow. If it isn’t working for you, change it.

    2. Remember that whatever you pay attention to grows in your mind.

    If you focus on what’s going wrong in your life—especially if you see it as “bad luck” you can do nothing about—it will seem blacker and more malevolent.

    In a short time, you’ll become so convinced that everything is against you that you’ll notice more and more instances where this appears to be true. As a result, you will almost certainly stop trying, convinced that nothing you can do will improve your prospects.

    Fatalism feeds on itself until people become passive “victims” of life’s blows. The “losers” in life are those who are convinced they will fail before they start anything; sure that their “bad luck” will ruin any prospects of success.

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    They rarely notice that the true reasons for their failure are ignorance, laziness, lack of skill, lack of forethought, or just plain foolishness—all of which they could do something to correct, if only they would stop blaming other people or “bad luck” for their personal deficiencies.

    Your attention is under your control. Send it where you want it to go. Starve the negative thoughts until they die.

    To improve your fortune, first decide that what happens is nearly always down to you; then try focusing on what works and what turns out well, not the bad stuff.

    Your “fate” really does depend on the choices that you make. When random events happen, as they always will, do you choose to try to turn them to your advantage or just complain about them?

    Thomas Jefferson is said to have used these words:

    “I’m a great believer in luck and I find the harder I work, the more I have of it.”

    Ralph Waldo Emerson said:

    “Shallow men believe in luck. Strong men believe in cause and effect.”

    Your luck, in the end, is pretty much what you choose it to be.

    Featured photo credit: LoboStudio Hamburg via unsplash.com

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