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Writing as a Form of Self Healing

Writing as a Form of Self Healing

As a self employed writer, I am certainly able to attest to the fact that the written word has the power to heal. However, you don’t have to be an experienced or eloquent writer to receive the self healing benefits that writing has to offer. All that is required is that you channel your emotions honestly and that you write solely on emotion and not reasoning. The beauty of writing as a form of self healing is that it allows you to release your feelings and come to terms with the problems but does not hurt anyone else because you are writing for yourself and do not have to show the writing to anyone else.

The following are a few brief examples of when writing can be used as a form of self healing.

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  1. Writing a letter, that you have no intention of sending, to a person from your past that has done something you perceive as wrong and hurtful to you. In this letter you are free to express your true feelings and can “tell” the person how their words or actions hurt you.
  2. Writing a poem or short story that illustrates your pain can help you to heal by providing you an outlet for your feelings. The poem or short story can be a wonderful work of art or simply a piece that is true to your feelings. Either way it serves the purpose of providing you with an emotional outlet.
  3. Even writing a list of words that describe your feelings can help you to heal. Just taking the time to put these words on paper allows you to feel as though the pain that you feel is leaving you as you write.

When you write as a form of self healing the focus should be on expressing your emotions. Writing in a way that is grammatically correct or has proper sentence structure and use of punctuation is not as important as writing words that adequately express your emotions. Self healing stems from honesty and expression of emotion and if you stifle or censor yourself while you write, you will not heal during the process. Below are some helpful guidelines for writing in a way that is also healing.

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  • Set aside time to write as a way of healing. Provide yourself with at least twenty to thirty minutes of uninterrupted time to write. Allowing adequate time in a quiet space that is free of interruptions will enable you to concentrate on your feelings.
  • Writing freely is also very important. It is important to remember that you are just writing for yourself and no one else will see your words so you do not have to worry that your words are too harsh.
  • The style of your writing is also not important. It doesn’t matter whether you write a poem, a letter, a play or any form of writing that you choose as long as the words are genuine expressions of your feelings.
  • Grammar, sentence structure and punctuation are not important so while you are writing as a form of self healing, don’t worry about editing your writing. Just keep going until you feel the pain subsiding and you feel as though your writing is complete. There is no need to go back and edit your work unless you want to do so.
  • Sometimes it is helpful to read your words aloud after you have finished writing. If you are in a secure location where your words won’t be overheard and you feel comfortable doing so, it might be helpful to read your piece out loud. This gives a voice to your writing and may be beneficial in the healing process.
  • Finally, it is advisable to destroy your writing either through burning or some other method of destruction when you have completed your writing. This puts a definitive end to the situation and helps to create closure. It also eliminates the possibility that your words will be read by someone that they might offend or hurt.

I certainly understand the value of writing as a form of healing. However, as a writer by trade, I don’t necessarily have an advantage over those who work in other industries. This is because writing for the purpose of healing, isn’t even remotely close to writing for publication. When you write to heal, you are free to write whatever you want with no restrictions or restraints. Grammar and punctuation go out the window and all that matters is the emotion behind the words.

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Last Updated on January 18, 2019

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

1. Limit the time you spend with them.

First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

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In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

2. Speak up for yourself.

Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

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But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

Why else would they be sharing this with you?

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5. Change the subject.

When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

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You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

7. Leave them behind.

Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

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