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Why Using This Common Excuse is a Perfect Way to Protect Your Time

Why Using This Common Excuse is a Perfect Way to Protect Your Time

Robert was stressed. He had too much on his plate.

He was asked to join different activities all the time, but he had hard time of saying “no” to those requests.

At the same time, he was trying to build his online business and his goal was to be able to resign from his current day job in the near future. Unfortunately, the frequent requests to join various activities were burning him out and made his online business plans virtually impossible.

He felt sad that he didn’t have the time necessary to focus on his business, since the other, non-essential stuff was taking up his time.

Eventually, he sat down and started to figure out his situation a little bit closer.  Quite soon he realized that there was only one way that could help in this situation – even if it sounded like the worst excuse ever.

Still, he decided to give it a try.

Are you saying “yes” too easily?

You’ll recognize Robert – there is probably someone like him in your friends or in your colleagues. Heck, even you could be “Robert,” suffering from the same issues he has with his time.

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His problem was saying “yes”too easily to requests. This way he can keep his “good guy” status alive and he doesn’t have to ponder what others think of him.

However, this “good guy” status has its price, as he is not able to focus on his own personal projects. Instead, he is letting others to dictate his time. And although unselfishness is a good trait in a person, too much is just too much.

So, saying “yes” is a double-sided sword and it can stress you down for good.

Now, I’m not saying that saying “no” is any easier, because it always isn’t. But when you start to feel burdened with far too many activities which are not really related to your personal vision, then you have to reconsider the commitments you engage with.

It’s clearly a time to change your strategy.

Yes, you are the nice guy

If I look at my own experiences in this situation, I can identify two core reasons for doing so (saying “yes” to requests):

  • Not trying to hurt other’s feelings
  • I’m too unselfish

In the first point (when I say “yes”), I don’t have to ponder what others think of me (just like Robert).

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However, it’s a different story if I said “no.” I would probably spend time on thinking what the other person is thinking of me if I said no.

But the bigger reason is that I’m too unselfish. Now, I don’t know about you, but many times you hear how you should help others when they ask your help and that’s totally fine.

However, when I’m too unselfish, I have found myself in situations and activities I don’t like. I feel like I’m obligated to say “yes” – even though I know that my time is wasted.

But is there a way to become a bit more self-centered and protect your time from requests that are not serving your anyway?

Yes…there is!

Are you ready to use a cliché?

Remember that I just said that sometimes I’m almost obligated to say “yes” to something I don’t want to?

Well, just some time ago I got a phone call from salesperson, who was at first trying to get me to donate money for charity. I managed to decline this request by just saying “no,” since I felt that this charity didn’t resonate with me that much.

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However, the other question the seller woman asked me came unexpectedly: “Would I like to order a magazine related to this very charity?”

I tried to find an excuse to get out of the situation and at last I ended up saying, “I don’t have enough time to read that magazine.”

Personally I hate that particular sentence, because in most of the cases it’s just an excuse of avoiding something.

But then the light bulb went on inside my head: saying this sentence wasn’t an excuse after all. I honestly didn’t have time to purchase a magazine subscription and read a magazine that I wasn’t interested in.

In fact, what I did was that I was protecting my time from something that didn’t resonate with me at all.

Like Robert, I’m building my online business on the side and I also want to spend time with my family – as much as possible.

Because of that, saying this common excuse was a perfect way to protect my time.

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Maybe you should try it too?

How to say this common phrase without sounding an excuse?

Here is how to say the “excuse” as easily as possible:

  1. Evaluate the request. You don’t want to decline a request right away. Instead, listen what the person has to say first and then start your decision process.
  2. Use the “excuses” if necessary. If the commitment isn’t supporting your goals or your vision, say “I don’t have time” or “I’m busy.” In fact, I used this very same reason when I was asked to become a president in our local computer club. I said “I don’t have time,” because I had some other activities already going on.
  3. Be honest. Honesty will pay off. If you say that you’re busy or that you don’t have enough time, you should truly mean it. In my situation, I want to dedicate time for my family and for building my online business, so that’s a valid reason for not joining any new commitments. However, if I feel that if the commitment supports my goals or vision somehow, then I’m ready to reconsider.
  4. Feel proud of your vision or goal. When you protect your time, you are also valuing yourself. And if you have a personal vision that you want to fulfill or an important goal to reach, feel proud of them and don’t let external forces steer you wrong. Sometimes finding enough time for your valuable activities may be difficult, so a good way to block the time snatchers is to use common phrases or “excuses” to set the boundaries. This way you are not compromising on executing your vision or delaying reaching your goals.
  5. Say “yes” selectively. No matter what, sometimes you may have to accept a request. This is especially true if a family member or a close relative asks you to do something. Naturally, you want to help you family members (or close relatives) in that situation, but here applies the same rule as in any other situation: too much is too much. You just have to use your judgment on a case-by-case basis if you want to be helpful or not. Remember, it’s perfectly fine to use the “excuses” in this context too. Then again, be honest about your situation and truly mean what you say.

In conclusion

Saying “yes” to too many commitments can very easily burn you down, thus making your stressed since you don’t have enough time for your own activities.

Because of this, you should use phrases like “I don’t have time” or “I’m busy,” if your situation is really like that.

Also, when you use the phrases, you are protecting your time from external forces that are trying to take your valuable time away from you.

Over to you: How do you protect your time?

Featured photo credit:  making excuses via Shutterstock

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Timo Kiander

Productivity Author and Founder of Productive Superdad

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Last Updated on March 25, 2020

How to Crush Your Lack of Motivation and Always Stay Motivated

How to Crush Your Lack of Motivation and Always Stay Motivated

How many times have you not achieved your goals and let yourself down due to your lack of motivation? When you’re not wallowing in sadness and self-pity, you are too busy procrastinating till you can’t anymore and before you know it, you are part of vicious cycle of anxiety and stress.

Whether it’s losing weight or bringing your business to fruition – motivation is essential for growth and success in every sphere of our lives.

That said, it is not easy staying motivated. In order to constantly stay motivated, you need to take ownership of your life and consciously make efforts in that direction.

Well, it’s never too late to take matters in your hands and change the course of your life. Here are 11 effective ways to crush your lack of motivation and always stay motivated:

1. Write Your Goals

The power of writing goals down has always been underestimated. Why write when you can remember, right? Wrong.

Our thoughts are all over the place and the first step to achieve your goals is to organize your thoughts. So, write your goals down, however big or small they might be. Make them as specific as possible and assign deadlines to each of them.

As you write them down and revisit them regularly, they get further drilled in your head, taking you closer to your goals. Doing this small exercise helps you to remain focused, motivated and lets you track your progress with ease.

Start today – take to your laptop or a diary and get down to writing what you wish to achieve in life.

2. Beat Procrastination

Your lack of motivation and procrastination go hand in hand. Every time you procrastinate, your motivation levels take a greater hit. The only way to bring an end to this loop is to stop procrastinating.

Next time you find yourself putting off something for ‘later’, stop and assess the reasons behind it. Get to the root of the cause and eliminate it in order to overcome this poor habit of procrastinating which is sabotaging your life and mental health.

Take a look at this guide and learn how to beat procrastination:

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What Is Procrastination (And the Complete Guide to Stop Procrastinating)

When you finally overcome procrastination, you will realize the positive impact it has on your mood and motivation levels.

3. Celebrate Small Wins

In the quest to achieve the bigger goals in life, we often forget to celebrate the smaller wins along the way. An achievement is an achievement – be it big or small, it deserves to be acknowledged and celebrated.

Finished a project on time? Reward yourself. Managed to run on the treadmill for a good one hour? Pat yourself on the back. Found time to meditate? Celebrate it.

It is these small achievements that reinstate that we are on the right path and take us one step closer to the bigger goals.

So, get into the habit of recognizing and appreciating small wins. You will be surprised to see how this practice helps you stay motivated.

4. Practice Gratitude

It’s easier to whine about what we don’t have rather than counting our blessings. Isn’t it?

Making gratefulness a part of your life is a very important step to retain high motivational levels. It revitalizes our spirits and renews our enthusiasm for life.

So, how do you practice gratitude? For starters, keep a gratitude journal to jot down what you are grateful for, express your gratitude to people you love and spread positivity wherever you go. If you need some inspiration to be thankful for, here it is:

60 Things To Be Thankful For In Life

By doing so, you begin to focus more on what you have rather than what you don’t and that is a great start to stay motivated.

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5. Be Optimistic

Life is not always hunky dory. There will be bad days when things aren’t going in your favor, when you feel lost and all you want to do is give up.

At such times, instead of letting negativity take over your life, adopt an optimistic approach to life. Quit overthinking, ask the right questions and focus on finding solutions.

Yes, there will be hurdles along the way but if you hang on to positive affirmations and hopes, the journey will be a lot smoother. So, with every passing day, sow the seeds of positivity and you are sure to build a positive environment around you.

6. Don’t Dwell on the Past

A lot of times, our lack of motivation stems from the habit of dwelling on the past. This gives rise to fear and regrets, preventing us from making progress in the present day.

Dwelling on the past is nothing but a waste of time. Understand that the past is long gone, and you cannot do anything to change that.

What you can do is make your present day worthwhile. Instead of looking back and having regrets, learn from your mistakes, forgive yourself and move on.

So, the next time you find your mind wandering off to the past, be determined to change the way you think and consciously concentrate on living in the present. This guide can help you:

10 Simple Steps To Let Go Of The Past

7. Face your Fears

You can never find motivation where there is fear. Identify the fear that is pulling you back and tackle it.

If you don’t face your fear head on, you cannot expect to conquer it and renew your motivation.

Ask yourself: What is stopping you? What are you scared of?

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Once you accept your fear, you can work on an action plan and think of solutions to overcome it. This article will give you some effective tips on conquering your fears:

How to Overcome Your Irrational Fears (That Stop You from Succeeding)

Seek external help if required but don’t choose to turn a blind eye over your fears – it will only aggravate matters.

8. Visualize your Success

You must have heard the famous quote, ‘see it to believe it’. That is exactly what visualization is about.

One of the most effective self-motivation techniques, visualizing the process to your desired outcome helps you move in a positive direction and achieve your goal.

Close your eyes and focus all your energies on the minutest of details that will take you where you want to reach. Doing this exercise everyday inspires you to keep going and not lose hope. The vision of attaining success will drive you to do better while instilling belief and confidence.

9. Find Inspiration

Can’t seem to find inspiration inwards? Don’t panic. There are plenty of external sources to gain inspiration from.

From motivational books and quotes to speeches, films and apps – it is a good idea to take help from motivational material to rekindle your spirits and regain your motivation.

Everyone is wired differently. For instance, a self-help book might work for your friend, but it might do nothing to move you. So, find what inspires you and turn to it when you are in desperate need for motivation.

Finding inspiration externally fills you with hope and sometimes that is all you need.

10. Enjoy Downtime

You are clearly exhausted with all the running you’re doing in life. So much, that you don’t even have time to stop and think what’s causing you so much unhappiness. All you know is that you are lacking motivation and everyday seems to have become a struggle.

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Now, that’s certainly not how you should live the rest of your life.

You need to schedule downtime for yourself, relax and give your mind and body some rest. Take a vacation, indulge in hobbies, meet some friends, put your hair down and stop with all the overthinking. It is important to do things that make you happy in order to think clearly and stay motivated.

11. Meditate Regularly

Meditation lets you take control of your mind. It improves focus and concentration while helping you relax.

Whenever you have had a tough day or find your thoughts going places, the best way to calm yourself down is by closing your eyes and meditating. It helps you to remove all the unnecessary frills in life and keeps you on the right track.

Include meditation in your daily schedule and you are sure to see an improvement in your productivity and motivation.

The Bottom Line

Practicing these simple exercises isn’t the tough part, what’s tough is religiously doing them every day.

However, don’t expect to get rid of your lack of motivation overnight. There will still be days when you will be low on energy but by making these conscious efforts to stay motivated, you are sure to see a vast change in your perspective and your response to bad days.

So, start today and be committed to making a positive change in your life.

More Tips About Staying Motivated

Featured photo credit: Sonnie Hiles via unsplash.com

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