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Why Readers Make Better Lovers

Why Readers Make Better Lovers

Unlucky in love? Maybe you should try your local bookstore. Here are 10 reasons why readers make fantastic lovers.

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    1. Readers are smart and intelligence is undoubtedly sexy.

    In the hit viral video from his Teen Choice Awards acceptance speech, Ashton Kutcher recently proclaimed that, “The sexiest thing in the entire world is being really smart.” Ashton is not alone in this sentiment—studies show that intelligence is ranked as one of the most attractive qualities in a mate.

    Reading makes you smarter and that’s a fact. People who read often not only have higher GPAs and test scores, but a greater overall knowledge on a variety of topics. Furthermore, making reading a lifelong habit can help delay dementia by keeping the mind sharp and active.

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    2. Bibliophiles are able to think quickly on their feet and their active imaginations help them find creative solutions.

    Readers are awesome to have in sticky situations. Individuals who spend more time reading have better analytical skills and are able to evaluate a problem quickly and skillfully to come up with a proper solution. Additionally, being exposed to different worlds, peoples, and ideas in their novels will make a reader’s mind wonderfully imaginative. Their creativity will inevitably keep your life, conversations and (ahem) bedroom interesting. After all, with a reader, you will never know what to expect.

    3. No more forgotten anniversaries—readers have better memories.

    With every character, setting, and plot twist that a reader absorbs, his or her brain is in overdrive building new and strengthening old neuron brain connections. As a result, they generally have better recall of day-to-day matters.

    james dean

      4. Bookworms are less stressed.

      Reading is a comforting pastime and avid readers can always turn to a book when they are looking to unwind, relax, and reduce stress. This is good news for their partners because stress can seriously lower libido and stressed couples tend to avoid intimacy and fight more often.

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      5. With an impressive vocabulary and flair for storytelling, readers make wonderful conversationalists.

      Nothing’s worse than stilted conversation on a date. Frequent readers, on the other hand, have a broader vocabulary and are better spoken than those that rarely crack open a book. As a result, your conversations will be much more colorful and engaging. Readers often think about life in unique and deeper ways that will spark challenging and exciting discussions.

      6. Your reading admirer will be culturally and artistically aware.

      Good readers are more than three times as likely to make art and go to concerts and museums as opposed to their non-reading counterparts. Can you say, “Awesome date nights?”

      ben

        7. Readers are more likely to succeed in their careers and have well-paying jobs.

        According to employers, a lack of reading and writing skills is one of the top shortcomings in new hires, giving proficient readers a better shot at getting hired. Moreover, they have a higher chance of being in a management position and, to top it all off, generally have higher salaries.

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        8. Readers are more likely to fulfill their civic duty.

        Active readers are not only more likely to vote in elections, but are over two times as likely to do volunteer work. Not only does altruism make you more attractive, but couples that do charity work together are often more intimate and emotionally connected.

        matthew goode

          9. Readers are more understanding and empathetic.

          Studies show that frequent fiction readers demonstrate a better ability to empathize with others and understand other people’s thoughts, feelings, and world view. Empathy is crucial in relationships—it is linked to shorter, less intense arguments as well as happier and longer relationships overall.

          10. Readers are passionate, vibrant, clever and complex.

          If you are with a reader, consider yourself lucky. With an incredible mind, imagination, wit and heart, they will challenge you quite unlike anyone else has before. They have lived many lives through the written word and will happily share those lives with you. They will want you to be a part of all of their worlds, all of their stories. Together, you will travel to fantastical lands across space and time and all the while will write a wonderful story of your own. I promise you this: every plot twist and character flaw, every afternoon spent in a bookstore and late night discussion over haphazard stacks of books will absolutely and undoubtedly be worth it!

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            The Gentle Art of Saying No

            The Gentle Art of Saying No

            No!

            It’s a simple fact that you can never be productive if you take on too many commitments — you simply spread yourself too thin and will not be able to get anything done, at least not well or on time.

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            But requests for your time are coming in all the time — through phone, email, IM or in person. To stay productive, and minimize stress, you have to learn the Gentle Art of Saying No — an art that many people have problems with.

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            What’s so hard about saying no? Well, to start with, it can hurt, anger or disappoint the person you’re saying “no” to, and that’s not usually a fun task. Second, if you hope to work with that person in the future, you’ll want to continue to have a good relationship with that person, and saying “no” in the wrong way can jeopardize that.

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            But it doesn’t have to be difficult or hard on your relationship. Here are the Top 10 tips for learning the Gentle Art of Saying No:

            1. Value your time. Know your commitments, and how valuable your precious time is. Then, when someone asks you to dedicate some of your time to a new commitment, you’ll know that you simply cannot do it. And tell them that: “I just can’t right now … my plate is overloaded as it is.”
            2. Know your priorities. Even if you do have some extra time (which for many of us is rare), is this new commitment really the way you want to spend that time? For myself, I know that more commitments means less time with my wife and kids, who are more important to me than anything.
            3. Practice saying no. Practice makes perfect. Saying “no” as often as you can is a great way to get better at it and more comfortable with saying the word. And sometimes, repeating the word is the only way to get a message through to extremely persistent people. When they keep insisting, just keep saying no. Eventually, they’ll get the message.
            4. Don’t apologize. A common way to start out is “I’m sorry but …” as people think that it sounds more polite. While politeness is important, apologizing just makes it sound weaker. You need to be firm, and unapologetic about guarding your time.
            5. Stop being nice. Again, it’s important to be polite, but being nice by saying yes all the time only hurts you. When you make it easy for people to grab your time (or money), they will continue to do it. But if you erect a wall, they will look for easier targets. Show them that your time is well guarded by being firm and turning down as many requests (that are not on your top priority list) as possible.
            6. Say no to your boss. Sometimes we feel that we have to say yes to our boss — they’re our boss, right? And if we say “no” then we look like we can’t handle the work — at least, that’s the common reasoning. But in fact, it’s the opposite — explain to your boss that by taking on too many commitments, you are weakening your productivity and jeopardizing your existing commitments. If your boss insists that you take on the project, go over your project or task list and ask him/her to re-prioritize, explaining that there’s only so much you can take on at one time.
            7. Pre-empting. It’s often much easier to pre-empt requests than to say “no” to them after the request has been made. If you know that requests are likely to be made, perhaps in a meeting, just say to everyone as soon as you come into the meeting, “Look guys, just to let you know, my week is booked full with some urgent projects and I won’t be able to take on any new requests.”
            8. Get back to you. Instead of providing an answer then and there, it’s often better to tell the person you’ll give their request some thought and get back to them. This will allow you to give it some consideration, and check your commitments and priorities. Then, if you can’t take on the request, simply tell them: “After giving this some thought, and checking my commitments, I won’t be able to accommodate the request at this time.” At least you gave it some consideration.
            9. Maybe later. If this is an option that you’d like to keep open, instead of just shutting the door on the person, it’s often better to just say, “This sounds like an interesting opportunity, but I just don’t have the time at the moment. Perhaps you could check back with me in [give a time frame].” Next time, when they check back with you, you might have some free time on your hands.
            10. It’s not you, it’s me. This classic dating rejection can work in other situations. Don’t be insincere about it, though. Often the person or project is a good one, but it’s just not right for you, at least not at this time. Simply say so — you can compliment the idea, the project, the person, the organization … but say that it’s not the right fit, or it’s not what you’re looking for at this time. Only say this if it’s true — people can sense insincerity.

            Featured photo credit: Pexels via pexels.com

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