Today’s post is not so much a personal development ‘lesson’ as it is a discussion and exploration into how men and women are wired; a look at something which interests me. As always, I don’t have all the answers but I do have plenty of questions and thoughts. Being as I’m not a female (mostly), I may be completely off track… so feel free to enlighten me, ladies.
As a scientist, personal development bloke and fascinated observer of people, I love to see what people do (and don’t do) and then try to figure why they do (or don’t do) whatever it is that they’re doing. Or not doing. As the case may be. Or not be. If you know what I mean. Hey, don’t you complain… I’m confused and I’m writing it!
Anyway, there’s two interesting observations I’ve made lately.
In most of my open-to-the-public workshops (as opposed to my corporate gigs) the vast majority of my audience is typically women. The weekend just past we ran a ‘Renovate Your Life’ workshop and over eighty percent of the attendees were of the more attractive and sweeter smelling gender. A couple of weeks ago I gave an open-to-the-public keynote presentation (health, fitness, lifestyle, psychology stuff) in a large fitness centre and nearly ninety percent(!) of the audience were women. These kinds of percentages are pretty common for my presentations. Now, if I was a young, good-looking, stud-muffin with a six-pack and a severe case of Brad-Pitt-itis that might give us some insight into the skewed numbers, but clearly I’m not, and clearly, people are coming along for the information, the motivation and the education. Even when I do a presentation where many of the people in the audience don’t really know who I am, we still have a much higher percentage of women book in and attend.
The vast majority of commentors on personal development sites are women. While it varies a little from article to article, the ratio of female to male contributors is quite amazing. Recently I took a stroll through some of my past posts and the percentage of female commentors is regularly up around the ninety percent mark.
So the obvious question is, “why does this happen and what does it tell us?”
You’re right; that’s actually two questions.
Well, I’m not really sure but I’ll throw around a few possibilities…
- All the men are out hunting.
- Only a very small percentage of men can read and write.
- What I write or speak about isn’t applicable to the males of the species.
- I’m not manly enough to connect with the blokes.
- Women need more help than men.
- I don’t write enough articles about monster trucks or cage fighting.
Naaah, probably not.
- A higher percentage of blokes (higher than ten percent that is) actually read my stuff but they are not as comfortable commenting as the ladies.
- Growing up, blokes are not ‘trained’ to talk about relationships, feelings, emotions, fears, weaknesses, problems.. etc.
- Perhaps some guys consider having a need for ‘personal development’ to be a sign of weakness (which would make me… pathetic).
- Blokes don’t have the same level of emotional intelligence or awareness as the girls. Or maybe they just don’t show it.
- Women are simply more aware and more in touch with their emotional selves.
- Women are more prepared to admit (and deal with) flaws, weaknesses and destructive habits and behaviours.
- Women are more proactive (about creating positive change) while blokes are more reactive – they wait for the catastrophe to happen and then slip into their Superman outfit.
- One of my (female) staff suggested that women ‘search’ more because overall they’re not as happy as men. Don’t yell at me – a woman told me that.
- The way I communicate resonates more with women.
- Perhaps the site needs less photos of sunsets and more images of blokes and their power tools.
- Women just like talking.
A final thought…
Maybe some of us alpha-male-warriors need to climb down from the security of our monster trucks and go and see Sex and the City tonight.
Or perhaps give another bloke a hug.
Help a confused male out; let me know your thoughts on this perplexing issue.
I’m off to hunt.
Er, I mean do Yoga.