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These 8 Good Things Will Happen When You Start Writing Diaries

These 8 Good Things Will Happen When You Start Writing Diaries

Writing to yourself is an important means of self expression. Whether you call it a diary or refer to it as a journal, having a place to write down your thoughts, feelings, memories and personal impressions about life can be healing and teach you to know yourself better. It can also unlock the power of your creativity, and inspire you to manifest dreams that might otherwise stay hidden. If you don’t keep a diary already, here are 8 good things that will happen when you start writing diaries.

1. You’ll Know Yourself better

History tells us that the Greek philosopher Socrates, often credited as the source for the famous adage Know Thyself, used a method of teaching which involved dialogues, questions and answers between individuals going back and forth that whittled an issue down to its deepest level of truth. When writing a diary, it is very common for us to engage in similar forms of inquiry on paper, writing out questions about life and then answering them ourselves.

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Whether you come to a final truth in the end is less important than the actual process of giving voice to your own inner reasoning and various points of view. This process of allowing more than one point of view to emerge encourages you to witness your own self, even when it may be fragmented, unsure, or expressing emotions that contradict each other. It allows you to see and acknowledge your true complexity. Witnessing the richness of your human experience and being able to see it on paper truly helps you to, as the great philosopher said, know thyself.

2. You’ll Express Yourself

Expressing yourself is another important aspect of keeping a diary. Beyond simply offering a means of self expression through the written word, often diaries are full of doodles and drawings that accentuate the actual text of what is being written. These doodles can be as simple as the butterflies drawn by a child who is joyful, or the tornadoes on the edge of the paper created by a teenager who is disturbed.

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Regardless of the actual content, this mirror of expression allows you to say what otherwise might be too challenging to say and give voice to emotions that may otherwise be repressed. It allows you to rehearse difficult conversations on paper as well. Having the blank page to fill up is in many ways an analogy to life, seeing yourself be expressed one letter and one doodle at a time.

3. You’ll Work Through Hard Choices

When life sends you any kind of challenge, you can work through those options in your diary, noting the moral implications as well as the emotional pains of decisions that are difficult to make. As an extreme example, here is a link to a famous diary entry of a Patrick Breen, a member of the ill fated Donner party group of pioneers who were trapped in the Sierra Nevada mountains in the winter of 1846-1847, some of whom resorted to cannibalism

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4. You’ll Develop Emotional Intimacy

Keeping a diary is a process not only of self expression but also self reflection. As you read what you have written, whether it is a recent entry or one from many months or years ago, it becomes a means of listening to yourself and uncovering the emotional landscape of who you truly are. By developing this sense of intimacy with yourself, it opens the possibility for greater emotional intimacy with others.

5. You’ll Feel Better as You Put Your Thoughts and Feelings on Paper

Often, a diary is that safe place where we can unleash thoughts or emotions that might be too uncomfortable to express in a more public setting. Whether it is venting anger, writing about a romantic crush, or being the important place to grieve the loss of a loved one, having a safe place to release your thoughts and emotions usually makes you feel better as a whole by providing an outlet for thoughts and feelings that otherwise could otherwise get bottled up inside of you.

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6. You’ll Build Memories on Paper

Sometimes even the smallest details of events in our past are items we grow to cherish as we get older. By keeping a detailed diary you are documenting those moments in your life that are worth writing about.

7. You’ll Brainstorm New Ideas

Having the opportunity to brainstorm and toss out ideas without being attached to an outcome is a diary tool used by some of the worlds greatest artistic geniuses. Here is an example of how film director Stanley Kubrick used this technique to arrive at the title of one of his most famous films.

8. You’ll Create a Map That Holds Secrets to Your Own Evolution

A diary reveals far more about a person than simply the details of what is written inside of it. You don’t have to hold a college degree in the science of Graphology (handwriting analysis) to see how your own handwriting reveals secrets about your psychological state of being. Noticing how your handwriting changes as you grow older, when it is bold and confident versus when it small and timid, is just one of the interesting benefits of keeping a diary over a long period of time.

These 8 reasons to start a diary will hopefully get you started.

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Last Updated on October 17, 2019

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

You see your partner every single day. They are the first person you talk to in the morning and the last person you kiss goodnight.

But does seeing each other day in and day out equal a healthy relationship? Not necessarily.

Spending quality time with your partner is the best way to ensure your relationship stays healthy and strong. This means going above and beyond sitting together while you watch Netflix or going out for the occasional dinner. You deserve more from your relationship – and so does your spouse!

What does quality time mean? It means spending time with your spouse without interruption. It’s a chance for you to come together and talk. Communication will build emotional intimacy and trust.

Quality time is also about expressing love in a physical way. Not sex, necessarily (but that’s great, too!) but through hand-holding, cuddling, caressing, and tickling. Studies show that these displays of affection will boost partner satisfaction.[1]

So how do you spend quality time with your partner? Here are 13 relationship tips on making the most out of your time with your partner.

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1. Recognize the Signs

If you want a healthy relationship, you have to learn how to recognize the signs that you need to spend more quality time together.

Some telltale signs include:

  • You’re always on your phones.
  • You value friendships or hobbies over quality time with your spouse.
  • You aren’t together during important events.
  • You are arguing more often or lack connection.
  • You don’t make plans or date nights.
  • You’re not happy.

If you are experiencing any of these relationship symptoms, know that quality time together can reverse the negative effects of the signs above.

2. Try New Things Together

Have you ever wanted to learn how to play an instrument or speak another language? How about skydive or ballroom dance?

Instead of viewing these as solo hobbies and interests, why not involve your partner?

Trying new activities together builds healthy relationships because it encourages spouses to rely on one another for emotional and physical support.

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Shared hobbies also promote marital friendship, and the Journal of Happiness Studies found that marital satisfaction was twice as high for couples who viewed each other as best friends.[2]

3. Schedule in Tech-Free Time

Your phone is a great way to listen to music, watch videos, and keep up-to-date with friends and family. But is your phone good for your relationship?

Many couples phone snub, or ‘phub’, one another. Studies show that phubbing can lower relationship satisfaction and increase one’s chances of depression.[3]

Reduce those chances by removing distractions when spending quality time together and showing your partner they have your full attention.

4. Hit the Gym as a Couple

One way you can spend more time together as a couple is by becoming workout partners. Studies show that couples are more likely to stay with their exercise routine if they work out together.[4] Couples also work out harder than they would solo. One study found that 95 percent of couples who work out together maintained weight loss compares to the 66 percent of singles who did.[5]

Join a gym, do at-home couples’ workouts, try couples yoga, hit the hiking trails, or get your bikes out. No matter which way you choose to exercise, these healthy activities can promote a healthy relationship.

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5. Cook Meals Together

Pop open a bottle of wine or put some romantic music on while you get busy – in the kitchen, of course!

One of the best relationship tips for spending quality time together when you both have busy schedules is to cook meals together.[6]

Spice things up and try and prepare a four-course meal or a fancy French dish together. Not only is this a fun way to spend your time together, but it also promotes teamwork.

If all goes well, you’ll have a romantic date night meal at home that you prepared with your four hands. And if the food didn’t turn out the way you’d hoped, you are guaranteed to have a laugh and create new memories together.

6. Have a Regular Date Night

Couples experience a greater sense of happiness and less stress when they are spending quality time together.[7] One of the biggest relationship tips for a healthy partnership is to include a date night in your weekly routine.

The National Marriage Project found that having a weekly date night can make your relationship seem more exciting and helps prevent relationship boredom.[8] It also lowers the probability of divorce, improves your sex life, and increases healthy communication.

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Some great ideas for what to do on your date night include:

  • Have a movie marathon – Gather up your favorite flicks and cuddle up on the couch.
  • Play games together – Cards, board games, video games, and other creative outlets are a fun way to spend quality time together.
  • Recreate your first date – Go back to that restaurant and order the same meal you did when you first got together. You can spice up your evening by pretending you’re strangers meeting for the first time and see how sexy the night gets.
  • Plan a weekend getaway – There’s nothing better than traveling with the one you love.
  • Dinner and a movie – A classic!
  • Try a new restaurant – Make it your mission to rate and try all of the Mexican restaurants/Irish pubs/Italian trattorias in your area.
  • Have a long sex session – Intimacy promotes the release of the oxytocin hormone which is responsible for a myriad of great feelings.[9]

Here’re even more date night ideas for your reference: 50 Unique and Really Fun Date Ideas for Couples

Final Thoughts

The benefits of spending quality time together are endless. Here are just some of the ways it can contribute to a healthy relationship:

  • Improves emotional and physical intimacy
  • Lowers divorce rates
  • Improves communication
  • Reduces marital boredom
  • Bonds couples closer
  • Improves friendship
  • Boosts health
  • Reduces stress

These are all excellent reasons to start making date night a regular part of your week.

It’s easy to have a healthy relationship when you set aside dedicated time to share with your spouse. Try new things together, make your spouse your workout buddy, and look for innovative ways to be close and connected.

These relationship tips will bring great benefits to your marriage.

Featured photo credit: Allen Taylor via unsplash.com

Reference

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