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Sharing Travel Plans: Can It Help You?

Sharing Travel Plans: Can It Help You?

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    When I plan a trip, I make arrangements to meet up with people. I email anyone I know might be in area, announce my itinerary on Twitter and even add a trip to Dopplr. My efforts have paid off: I’ve met people I had already become fast friends with online in person. I’ve expanded the scope of projects by taking a few minutes away from my vacation to meet with a client. I’ve even managed to meet entirely new people by tagging along to meetups of various kinds. Sharing your travel plans can pay off.

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    Quick Payoffs

    Unless you’re planning a trip with the sole purpose of getting away from everything in your day-to-day life, I’m willing to argue that there’s a big payoff to sharing your travel plans. Right now, thousands of people are planning to converge on Austin, Texas for SXSW. Pretty much every social media site I’m active on is buzzing with what attendees are planning: some are making arrangements to share cab rides or even hotel rooms on the basis of shared travel plans. Others are making arrangements to finally meet people they’ve been talking to online for years. Still others are planning how to best take advantage of the fact that they’ll have a whole list of people they’ll want to talk to once they get to Austin.

    Sure, SXSW is at least partially about networking. But the same holds true even if you’re doing nothing more than taking a weekend getaway to the next state over. You don’t have to spend every hour of your trip with people, but think about the benefits of telling people you’ll be in town:

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    • You can connect with others in your field, maybe learning something that can come in handy when you get back to the office on Monday.
    • You can make a new connection with a company you’re hoping to work with — or for — in the future.
    • You can reconnect with old friends and see how they’re doing.
    • You can make some new friends and have some fun, rather than spending an evening in a hotel with a television for company.

    Share Your Plans

    Before you can take advantage of those connections that sharing your travel itinerary creates, you first have to actually share it. I’m a big fan of making mention of my plans on the sites that I most commonly frequent, such as Twitter. There are a few sites that actually specialize in sharing travel plans, though. Dopplr and TripIt are the two that I’ve seen most commonly used. Whether or not these sites are the best, the fact that they have quite a few members is crucial: the more people that are on a site, the more likely that you’ll be able to share your plans with someone you’re actually interested in seeing.

    TripIt can create an automatic itinerary for you if you forward the confirmation emails you receive for booking a hotel room or a flight. Dopplr allows you to enter your travel plans yourself. Either option can be good — although contacting people you know live in your intended destination can guarantee a better response when you ask to meet in person. It can also be worth checking out what’s actually going on in the area, through sites like Meetup, in order to find out if all the cool kids will be in one place on a particular date.

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    Privacy and Travel

    I remember my grandmother planning for a trip when I was a kid. She bought a timer for the lights in her living room, setting them to turn off and on as if she was home. She made arrangements for her newspaper and her mail to be held until she returned, so that neither a stack of papers on her porch nor an overflowing mailbox would give away the fact that she wasn’t home. My grandmother went to some lengths to make sure no one knew she was out of town until after her return.

    In contrast, I post my travel plans on Twitter, Facebook and even on Dopplr. I do take a few measures to keep my home safe when I’m out of town, but pretty much anyone who wants to discover where in the world I am can do so.

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    I know that one of my grandmother’s big concerns about whether people knew she was traveling focused on the fact that someone might be able to take advantage of her absence. Coming home to a break in was definitely a concern of hers. I’m not about to say that it wasn’t a valid concern, either. I lock up my place whenever I’m gone and I make arrangements for someone to keep an eye on it while I’m gone.

    But, for a long list of reasons, I don’t feel the need to take the same approach to protecting my privacy when I travel that my grandmother did. I think that there are some serious safety concerns that go along with broadcasting your whereabouts through any social media site and I don’t think that there are fewer reasons to be concerned about leaving your home empty. In part, I mitigate those facts by not sharing my home address with anywhere near the frequency that I share my personal location. Someone set on finding out where I live could do it, but not casually.

    There’s not a perfect solution if you have any interest in sharing your travel plans online, but many people seem comfortable taking those risks.

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    Last Updated on May 21, 2019

    How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

    How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

    For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

    If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

    Example 1

    You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

    You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

    In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

    Example 2

    You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

    People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

    You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

    Example 3

    You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

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    The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

    Example 4

    You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

    Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

    If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

    Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

    • Understand your own communication style
    • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
    • Communicate with precision and care
    • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

    1. Understand Your Communication Style

    To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

    In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

    Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

    2. Learn Others Communication Styles

    Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

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    If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

    “How do you prefer to receive information?”

    This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

    To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

    3. Exercise Precision and Care

    A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

    On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

    Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

    I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

    I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

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    In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

    The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

    Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

    4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

    Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

    In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

    “Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

    Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

    Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

    It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

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    It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

    It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

    Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

    Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

    The Bottom Line

    When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

    I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

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    Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

    Reference

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