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Powerboost Your Speech With One Simple Trick

Powerboost Your Speech With One Simple Trick

When we meet a person, our first impression is based on their body language and their speech. When someone goes up on a stage, or gives a presentation at a business meeting, many pairs of eyes will be following and judging this person. If you are up there and talking, you want to give your best impression.

While many workshops and online videos focus on teaching us how to adjust our body language to come across as confident and convince others of our message, less attention is given to how we phrase things. Speech should flow, but there is this one little bad habit most of us have; one that builds a dam in our flowing sentences. This habit makes our message sound as if we are building our foundations on quicksand.

Do you know which bad habit I mean?

It is the habit of using that not-even-a-word in too many sentences. It is the habit of saying “uhm”—something we generally are not even aware of. When we let this habit slip into our speech, it weakens our message, and our audience and clients will be less convinced of our claims.

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Make a pledge today: drop the “uhm”.

The nasty thing about “uhm” is that it’s often too tiny to even notice. It has become part of our expressions and virtually everybody does it, therefore, it takes practice and effort to unlearn stuffing our sentences with it.

To get a hold of your bad habit of using “uhm”, you can try the following exercises:

1. Record your speech when you prepare.

To go from using “uhm” without even noticing it, to awareness of this bad habit is the first step to making a change. When you prepare for a presentation, make sure to record yourself.

Ideally, you can use a videocamera on a tripod to record your speech and body language. Most of us, however, prepare presentations by sitting in front of the computer screen and talking through the slides to see if we meet the time requirements. If you prepare in this way, simply use a voice recorder.

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After recording your speech, listen to it. Pay close attention, and mark down on a sheet of paper the number of times you said “uhm”. You might be unpleasantly surprised.

2. Write out your entire speech beforehand.

We use “uhm” when we know the contents and message that we want to get across to our audience, but not the exact sentences and formulations to actually deliver our ideas, so the best way to prepare for a speech and to distill our message into crystal-clear sentences is by writing out the entire speech beforehand.

This practice might seem too much work. You should remember though that 1 minute of public speaking requires 1 hour of preparation time, as Wayne Burgraff famously stated.

If you are serious about delivering your best and getting your message through in the very best way, then spend enough time on writing out your speech and improving it time and time again.

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3. Center and focus.

Before addressing a client or an audience, take a moment to center yourself. You can take a few deep breaths, and a 5-minute body scan, in which you pay attention to tension in your shoulders, how you clench your jaw, or any tension you feel in your neck.

Then, take half a minute to set your mind to your goal. Simply remind yourself of the main purpose of your speech or meeting.

You are ready to go now. Give it your best shot, enjoy the ride and don’t judge yourself while you are talking—it will only distract you. Be in the moment. Be your message and your goal.

4. Pay attention when you talk to friends.

Your practice does not end when you leave the stage or your job. Even when you talk to friends or strangers, pay attention to your exact formulations, and cut down on the “uhm”-ing.

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One way of actively paying attention and correcting your habit, is by wearing an elastic band around your wrist during your leisure time. Whenever you catch yourself on saying “uhm”, simply shift the elastic band to your other wrist. This practice trains your mind to notice your use of “uhm”, and eventually omit it.

5. Slow down.

If you have a bad case of the “uhm”s, then train yourself in speaking a little more slowly. Teach yourself to leave a few seconds of air in between your sentences. The purpose of slowing down is to align your mind with your speech, so you give your mind the time to clearly define what you want to say, before actually speaking.

With these tools, you are ready to make a more coherent, decisive and calm impression on your audience, your clients, your friends and random strangers. Radiating with a more composed attitude will not only improve your speech, but will eventually increase the respect others show towards you.

 

 

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Last Updated on January 18, 2019

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

1. Limit the time you spend with them.

First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

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In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

2. Speak up for yourself.

Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

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But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

Why else would they be sharing this with you?

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5. Change the subject.

When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

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You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

7. Leave them behind.

Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

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