Advertising
Advertising

Powerboost Your Speech With One Simple Trick

Powerboost Your Speech With One Simple Trick

When we meet a person, our first impression is based on their body language and their speech. When someone goes up on a stage, or gives a presentation at a business meeting, many pairs of eyes will be following and judging this person. If you are up there and talking, you want to give your best impression.

While many workshops and online videos focus on teaching us how to adjust our body language to come across as confident and convince others of our message, less attention is given to how we phrase things. Speech should flow, but there is this one little bad habit most of us have; one that builds a dam in our flowing sentences. This habit makes our message sound as if we are building our foundations on quicksand.

Do you know which bad habit I mean?

It is the habit of using that not-even-a-word in too many sentences. It is the habit of saying “uhm”—something we generally are not even aware of. When we let this habit slip into our speech, it weakens our message, and our audience and clients will be less convinced of our claims.

Advertising

Make a pledge today: drop the “uhm”.

The nasty thing about “uhm” is that it’s often too tiny to even notice. It has become part of our expressions and virtually everybody does it, therefore, it takes practice and effort to unlearn stuffing our sentences with it.

To get a hold of your bad habit of using “uhm”, you can try the following exercises:

1. Record your speech when you prepare.

To go from using “uhm” without even noticing it, to awareness of this bad habit is the first step to making a change. When you prepare for a presentation, make sure to record yourself.

Ideally, you can use a videocamera on a tripod to record your speech and body language. Most of us, however, prepare presentations by sitting in front of the computer screen and talking through the slides to see if we meet the time requirements. If you prepare in this way, simply use a voice recorder.

Advertising

After recording your speech, listen to it. Pay close attention, and mark down on a sheet of paper the number of times you said “uhm”. You might be unpleasantly surprised.

2. Write out your entire speech beforehand.

We use “uhm” when we know the contents and message that we want to get across to our audience, but not the exact sentences and formulations to actually deliver our ideas, so the best way to prepare for a speech and to distill our message into crystal-clear sentences is by writing out the entire speech beforehand.

This practice might seem too much work. You should remember though that 1 minute of public speaking requires 1 hour of preparation time, as Wayne Burgraff famously stated.

If you are serious about delivering your best and getting your message through in the very best way, then spend enough time on writing out your speech and improving it time and time again.

Advertising

3. Center and focus.

Before addressing a client or an audience, take a moment to center yourself. You can take a few deep breaths, and a 5-minute body scan, in which you pay attention to tension in your shoulders, how you clench your jaw, or any tension you feel in your neck.

Then, take half a minute to set your mind to your goal. Simply remind yourself of the main purpose of your speech or meeting.

You are ready to go now. Give it your best shot, enjoy the ride and don’t judge yourself while you are talking—it will only distract you. Be in the moment. Be your message and your goal.

4. Pay attention when you talk to friends.

Your practice does not end when you leave the stage or your job. Even when you talk to friends or strangers, pay attention to your exact formulations, and cut down on the “uhm”-ing.

Advertising

One way of actively paying attention and correcting your habit, is by wearing an elastic band around your wrist during your leisure time. Whenever you catch yourself on saying “uhm”, simply shift the elastic band to your other wrist. This practice trains your mind to notice your use of “uhm”, and eventually omit it.

5. Slow down.

If you have a bad case of the “uhm”s, then train yourself in speaking a little more slowly. Teach yourself to leave a few seconds of air in between your sentences. The purpose of slowing down is to align your mind with your speech, so you give your mind the time to clearly define what you want to say, before actually speaking.

With these tools, you are ready to make a more coherent, decisive and calm impression on your audience, your clients, your friends and random strangers. Radiating with a more composed attitude will not only improve your speech, but will eventually increase the respect others show towards you.

 

 

More by this author

Eva Lantsoght

Eva is a university professor and a professional structural engineer. She writes about achieving excellence and success in life on Lifehack.

20 Ways to Strive for Excellence in Life 11 Ways Busy People Make Time To Read Why Working Too Hard Could Be Bad For Your Career 10 Ways to Instantly Reduce Stress at Work Little Things You Do Can Keep You In A Good Mood All The Time

Trending in Communication

1 How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner 2 12 Surprising Benefits of Learning a New Language 3 5 Powerful Ways for Building Fulfilling Relationships 4 How a Lack of Communication Can Cost Your Career 5 What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on October 17, 2019

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

You see your partner every single day. They are the first person you talk to in the morning and the last person you kiss goodnight.

But does seeing each other day in and day out equal a healthy relationship? Not necessarily.

Spending quality time with your partner is the best way to ensure your relationship stays healthy and strong. This means going above and beyond sitting together while you watch Netflix or going out for the occasional dinner. You deserve more from your relationship – and so does your spouse!

What does quality time mean? It means spending time with your spouse without interruption. It’s a chance for you to come together and talk. Communication will build emotional intimacy and trust.

Quality time is also about expressing love in a physical way. Not sex, necessarily (but that’s great, too!) but through hand-holding, cuddling, caressing, and tickling. Studies show that these displays of affection will boost partner satisfaction.[1]

So how do you spend quality time with your partner? Here are 13 relationship tips on making the most out of your time with your partner.

Advertising

1. Recognize the Signs

If you want a healthy relationship, you have to learn how to recognize the signs that you need to spend more quality time together.

Some telltale signs include:

  • You’re always on your phones.
  • You value friendships or hobbies over quality time with your spouse.
  • You aren’t together during important events.
  • You are arguing more often or lack connection.
  • You don’t make plans or date nights.
  • You’re not happy.

If you are experiencing any of these relationship symptoms, know that quality time together can reverse the negative effects of the signs above.

2. Try New Things Together

Have you ever wanted to learn how to play an instrument or speak another language? How about skydive or ballroom dance?

Instead of viewing these as solo hobbies and interests, why not involve your partner?

Trying new activities together builds healthy relationships because it encourages spouses to rely on one another for emotional and physical support.

Advertising

Shared hobbies also promote marital friendship, and the Journal of Happiness Studies found that marital satisfaction was twice as high for couples who viewed each other as best friends.[2]

3. Schedule in Tech-Free Time

Your phone is a great way to listen to music, watch videos, and keep up-to-date with friends and family. But is your phone good for your relationship?

Many couples phone snub, or ‘phub’, one another. Studies show that phubbing can lower relationship satisfaction and increase one’s chances of depression.[3]

Reduce those chances by removing distractions when spending quality time together and showing your partner they have your full attention.

4. Hit the Gym as a Couple

One way you can spend more time together as a couple is by becoming workout partners. Studies show that couples are more likely to stay with their exercise routine if they work out together.[4] Couples also work out harder than they would solo. One study found that 95 percent of couples who work out together maintained weight loss compares to the 66 percent of singles who did.[5]

Join a gym, do at-home couples’ workouts, try couples yoga, hit the hiking trails, or get your bikes out. No matter which way you choose to exercise, these healthy activities can promote a healthy relationship.

Advertising

5. Cook Meals Together

Pop open a bottle of wine or put some romantic music on while you get busy – in the kitchen, of course!

One of the best relationship tips for spending quality time together when you both have busy schedules is to cook meals together.[6]

Spice things up and try and prepare a four-course meal or a fancy French dish together. Not only is this a fun way to spend your time together, but it also promotes teamwork.

If all goes well, you’ll have a romantic date night meal at home that you prepared with your four hands. And if the food didn’t turn out the way you’d hoped, you are guaranteed to have a laugh and create new memories together.

6. Have a Regular Date Night

Couples experience a greater sense of happiness and less stress when they are spending quality time together.[7] One of the biggest relationship tips for a healthy partnership is to include a date night in your weekly routine.

The National Marriage Project found that having a weekly date night can make your relationship seem more exciting and helps prevent relationship boredom.[8] It also lowers the probability of divorce, improves your sex life, and increases healthy communication.

Advertising

Some great ideas for what to do on your date night include:

  • Have a movie marathon – Gather up your favorite flicks and cuddle up on the couch.
  • Play games together – Cards, board games, video games, and other creative outlets are a fun way to spend quality time together.
  • Recreate your first date – Go back to that restaurant and order the same meal you did when you first got together. You can spice up your evening by pretending you’re strangers meeting for the first time and see how sexy the night gets.
  • Plan a weekend getaway – There’s nothing better than traveling with the one you love.
  • Dinner and a movie – A classic!
  • Try a new restaurant – Make it your mission to rate and try all of the Mexican restaurants/Irish pubs/Italian trattorias in your area.
  • Have a long sex session – Intimacy promotes the release of the oxytocin hormone which is responsible for a myriad of great feelings.[9]

Here’re even more date night ideas for your reference: 50 Unique and Really Fun Date Ideas for Couples

Final Thoughts

The benefits of spending quality time together are endless. Here are just some of the ways it can contribute to a healthy relationship:

  • Improves emotional and physical intimacy
  • Lowers divorce rates
  • Improves communication
  • Reduces marital boredom
  • Bonds couples closer
  • Improves friendship
  • Boosts health
  • Reduces stress

These are all excellent reasons to start making date night a regular part of your week.

It’s easy to have a healthy relationship when you set aside dedicated time to share with your spouse. Try new things together, make your spouse your workout buddy, and look for innovative ways to be close and connected.

These relationship tips will bring great benefits to your marriage.

Featured photo credit: Allen Taylor via unsplash.com

Reference

Read Next