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Positive Peer Pressure Can Propel You Forward

Positive Peer Pressure Can Propel You Forward

Have you been warned of peer pressure?

Like a monstrous storm put a mighty ship to wreck, peer pressure can destroy your life and leave you in shambles. Peer pressure has always been viewed as a negative force targeting the youth. There’s been a lot of research about peer pressure by behavioral scientists and many interesting conclusions drawn.

Let me not trouble you with the intricate details of how neurotransmitter levels in our brains can influence how we act and feel. In simpler terms, peer pressure is a powerful force that compels people to do something or act in a way that would make them feel accepted among their peers. And why so? Because, human beings are social animals. We live in groups, groups of closely knit individuals, and we regularly depend on each other. We all have this strong inner desire to be loved, to be cared for, and to be accepted by our friends, our peers. I would like to quote Mother Teresa who had beautifully summed up the innermost need of every human being alive.

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“The most terrible poverty is loneliness, and the feeling of being unloved.”
― Mother Teresa

And so, peer pressure has an influence on any human being, not just the young. Sometimes this influence is too strong and negative that it can lead to a downfall. However, as much negative impact it is feared to produce, so much so, the positive influence it can have on people is astonishing.

So how do we create a positive peer pressure that can push people to higher limits of personal excellence and help keep the momentum? Here are the bare essentials:

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Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much. Helen Keller

     Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much. Helen Keller

    1. Build self-esteem

    Though there is a natural tendency to seek acceptance by the people around, you need some healthy self-esteem also to back you up. Self-esteem is the way you feel about yourself. Self-esteem should be the core around which acceptance and praise by people around should be the icing. A strong but humble self-esteem will help you at times when people around you change. Further, it will help you motivate others when the team spirit crumbles.

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    How to develop this self-esteem? Your self-esteem may be low because of some of your childhood experiences or non-acceptance within your previous gang. Reassure yourself. No matter what you feel about yourself, you are unique and have been gifted with talents to be put to use for the betterment of the world. So make a list of things you are good at, make a list of compliments you’d received from people, and keep in touch with those who care about you and take time to encourage you.

    2. Positive peers

    Find people who beam with a positive attitude and are bubbling with enthusiasm and determination to rise above. Stay close to them. Or even better, bring positive pressure into the gang you are already in. Inspire people around to put their efforts into personal excellence. Your friends may already be victims of negative peer pressure, so make them feel accepted. You can easily form a group of people with similar interests who share similar enthusiasm.

    It was not considered cool to study hard and hang out with books in the college where I studied. A small group of friends and I joined together and read a lot together, which helped us with good grades in the tough medical school and beyond. We did have parties on weekends, watched movies together, and laughed a lot, but we also kept excelling in our studies. We kept away from drugs and other bad influences.

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    3. No envy!

    Once you set yourself in a positive peer group and soon start to soar, keep up the spirit. Keep challenging yourself and rise more. By doing that, you’d contribute to the positive peer pressure. Never compare yourself with others. Never become jealous of your peers. Encourage them no matter what. You’ll soon realize that as people excel in their individual lives, they would bring momentum to the group they belong to. But jealousy and comparison would tear it down. Help foster a healthy competitive spirit in the gang you belong.

    Positive peer pressure is just like team work, except that here, each one works on his/her own personal excellence and the success in turn provides the fuel for further propulsion.

    Do watch this short one minute commercial about positive peer pressure from Values.com. You’ll sure appreciate how beautifully peer pressure can transform someone.

    Do the right thing. Pass it on.

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    Last Updated on November 15, 2018

    Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

    Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

    What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

    As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

    The Success Mindset

    Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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    The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

    The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

    The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

    How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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    How To Create a Success Mindset

    People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

    1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

    How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

    A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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    There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

    2. Look For The Successes

    It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

    3. Eliminate Negativity

    You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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    When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

    4. Create a Vision

    Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

    If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

    An Inspirational Story…

    For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

    What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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