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Not Leading a Life of Passion? You Will After Reading This

Not Leading a Life of Passion? You Will After Reading This

Passion is: a “strong and barely controllable emotion.”

Passion is believing that you are one-of-a-kind and were born for a reason.

Passion is taking steps everyday to move towards your life purpose.

Passion is believing that every negative experience is part of the journey of the evolution of your soul.

Passion is contagious. Others will be drawn to you like bees to honey.

Conversely, lack of passion will drive others away. You’ll end up lonely and die with regrets.

Find your passions and pursue them to live a good life.

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1. Know yourself and then you can find your passion.

What do you like to do? What lights you up? What do you love to talk about every chance you get? If you weren’t afraid and if you didn’t care what others will thought of you, what would you be doing that you are not doing right now? “I’d quit my job and start my own business.”

If you are afraid quitting will put you in financial distress, what baby steps can you take to move one step towards a more passionate life? “I can research and read books about entrepreneurship so that I can prepare myself to quit my job.”

Enthusiasm for your next step is contagious and attractive. Others can help make your dreams a reality. When you mentally challenge yourself and go beyond the edges of your comfort zone, it can produce a state of flow that is bliss.

Just take the next step.

2. Figure out why you were born.

“The two most important days of your life are #1: the day you were born and #2: the day you discovered why you were born.” –Les Brown, motivational speaker.

“Your Dream Is Possible” It is your duty to figure out why you were born through making “lemonade” out of the “lemons” of your negative experiences. Combine this lemonade with your passions and you’ll find the lightening rod that will jolt you out of bed in the morning.

3. Don’t take your passions and talents for granted.

What comes easily to you does not come easily to others.

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I became a Success and Happiness Catalyst through connecting the dots of my life looking backwards. My negative experiences, pharmaceutical career, my passions in nutrition, self-image psychology, and Law of Attraction created my life’s calling to help others go from good to great and achieve success and happiness.

Jason, my 21-year-old son, took his electronic music composing and producing talents for granted until he realized he was one of the most talented musicians at Tufts University. The Universe gave him these talents so he can make a difference through music. How are you using the talents you were given to entertain or help others?

4. Do it for yourself and not for the purpose of seeking approval from others.

Seeking approval through “fake” passions or goals is a recipe for misery. Your “high” will be short-lived. The Paradox of Intention says: “You must have goals, but your happiness cannot be tied to those goals. You must be happy first before you reach your goals.”

You might find it hard to be happy first because of old emotional scars. The younger parts of you that hold shame, humiliation, and rejection make you seek validation and approval from others so they can feel they are lovable, worthy, and enough. You need to heal the old wounds so you can feel better about yourself. When you are happy with who you are, you won’t need to do things for the purpose of seeking approval from others.

If you need to overcome sadness so you can live a life of passion, read this post to “Overcome Sadness: 19 Simple Things You Didn’t Realize You Can Do.” Are you guilty of seeking approval from others? What are the emotional scars underneath your need for approval?

5. Meet others with a shared passion.

It’s important so you feel connected because love and belonging are hard-wired human needs. You can find like-minded people through the internet, forums, Facebook groups, LinkedIn groups, Meet-up groups, etc. If you don’t find a group that shares your passions, create your own.

6. Understand that failing is learning.

Thomas Jefferson failed at least 1,000 times (some say 10,000 times) before the light bulb was invented. Rejection is a part of life. When you pick yourself up after you’ve failed, you will gain more confidence to try again and you’ll be an inspiration to others. People who are successful knows the fastest route to success is through many failures.

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If you are afraid of failing, you have to address the emotional scars that has you frozen in some 6th grade memory when your teacher, father, or mother said you would never amount to anything. See point #4 above on how to overcome this fear of failure.

7. Use your passion to change the world.

Steve Jobs “People With Passion Can Change The World.”

Mark Zuckerberg of Facebook.

Dr. Mehmet Oz made talking about poop normal everyday language.

Lisa Nichols, a very inspiring, energetic, and charismatic personality. Watch her “Questions That Will Stir Your Soul” video.

David Wood of The KissAss Life. David has the #1 personal development podcast on iTunes. Downloaded by listeners from 200 countries, he has a beautiful “rags to riches” story and has turned his lemons into his lemonade helping others to live a KissAss Life. These gurus can inspire you to be a guru in your own community. How would you like to make a difference before you go to heaven?

8. Take classes, read books, and volunteer if you don’t know what you are passionate about.

One of these activities can help you find your your passion.

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9. Write about your passions through blogging.

There will be a readership for your point of view. You’ll be the leader and attract a following. Your life will be more exciting when you meet new people through blogging.

10. Lead a workshop on your expertise.

If you read five books on a subject, you are an expert on the subject. There is so much information on the internet that people will pay you to show them how to solve their problems in a clear and simple way. For example, “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” became a blockbuster because Steven Covey gathered concepts that were already known and packaged them in a way that was concise, simple, and actionable.

So gather your friends and talk from the heart about what you’ve learned and show them how they can improve their lives. No need for a formal PowerPoint presentation. If you find you enjoy doing workshops, then explore how you can take this further and make it your life purpose.

11. A life of passion will help you look and feel younger. 

Passion and purpose slow down aging. Passion creates happy thoughts. Happy thoughts create great moods. A happy and healthy mind will minimize the expression of your disease genes. Studies have shown that 2/3 of the world’s health problems can be traced to negative thoughts and beliefs.

Negativity will not give you the energy to pursue your passions. Negativity is a fuel for your body to turn on disease genes. Positivity and passion will turn on your health-promoting genes and slow down the aging process.

12. Use these resources to figure out what your passions are.

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Last Updated on May 21, 2019

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

Example 1

You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

Example 2

You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

Example 3

You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

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The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

Example 4

You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

  • Understand your own communication style
  • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
  • Communicate with precision and care
  • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

1. Understand Your Communication Style

To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

2. Learn Others Communication Styles

Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

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If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

“How do you prefer to receive information?”

This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

3. Exercise Precision and Care

A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

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In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

“Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

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It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

The Bottom Line

When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

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Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

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