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How to Create Your Unique Personal Momentum

How to Create Your Unique Personal Momentum

personal momentum

    When momentum’s on your side, you feel invincible. You feel unstoppable. It’s referred to in all facets of life. For example, as you watch a sports game, it’s only a matter of time before one of the announcers brings up momentum; which side has it, and whether they can hold on to it until the game’s end to clinch the victory.

    Have you ever taken a closer look at what momentum is all about? If it’s that great, how can we reproduce it in everything that we do?

    In physics 101, momentum is simply (or not so simply) defined as:

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    How gaining personal momentum behaves
      Gaining Personal Momentum is quite like its physical equivalent

      The more mass and velocity an object in motion has, the greater the momentum or:

      Velocity x Mass = Momentum

      Much like in physics, our goals and objectives have their own kind of momentum. Momentum, whether relating to physic or our own tasks and goals, operate under certain parameters and constraints. I argue that the same elements that work against gaining momentum in physics work against your projects and goals as well. For example, the larger the mass, the harder it is the get moving and gain momentum.

      Let’s take a closer look:

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      1# Mass

      Mass in physical terms is weight that’s usually measured in pounds or kilograms. In our framework, mass is the amount of work you need to do. For example, in most cases a project has a bigger mass than a task; a 3 year goal may have a bigger mass than a project. It all boils down to the amount of work you’ll need to invest.

      I suggest that when dealing with “mass”, it’s all about planning: if you can’t break down the mass into movable pieces, you’ll never get the velocity you need to achieve momentum. If we plan properly, we can get our massive project going by moving all the smaller massed actions. Remember the other end of the equation as well: make sure you plan your entire project so that when your project gains momentum, you want to keep feeding it, e.g., have actions lined up to execute when the time it right.

      2# Velocity

      Velocity is all about the “force” you need to invest in a task taking into consideration the forces that may be working against you.

      When there’s a lot of mass, there’s a lot of potential velocity laying in wait. However, to achieve immediate velocity on the entire mass, you’ll have to invest a considerable amount of force that you probably don’t possess. That’s why it’s better to start from little “mass elements” or actions.

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      Here’s a quick example: finishing your post-doctorate thesis may seem like an overwhelming mountain to move. You may not have the energy to get this project going, and it may seem so overwhelming that you simply can’t get it started. However, the force you need to handle the first action—initial brainstorming with a professor—is quite feasible. The force you need for the first action is significantly less than finishing your thesis. Remember, it’s all related: less force to move smaller actions. Many actions moving will increase the overall mass and help you gain momentum.

      It sounds simple, but there are items you need to be aware of that can work against you!

      Direction

      You need to apply the force in the correct direction. Imagine trying to get a car across a finish line that is 100 yards directly in front of you. The obvious answer is to always apply the force in the same direction, and the same applies for your projects: make sure that all of your actions are getting you to the same end result.

      Failing to plan, doing the wrong things at the wrong times, and forgetting actions entirely are all forces that will work against you, ultimately lessening your momentum.

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      Friction

      Resistance is a killer. Imagine moving the car across a flat road versus an uphill road. There’s a big difference, right? Be watchful of the friction causing elements in your life: Are you tired? Are you eating right? Are you exercising? Are you organized? Do you have an application that will help you manage your actions and projects? All these and more, if not handled correctly, will have a negative impact on you. They are elements that are working against you and preventing you from gaining personal momentum.

      I won’t delve into greater detail, expanding about things like escape velocity, the difference between kinetic friction and static and even diving into inertial mass (measured by the amount of resistance of an object to acceleration): those could be the subjects of other posts.

      Now that you know what momentum is all about, use it to your advantage.
      Until next time.

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      1 19 Golden Pieces of Relationship Advice From the Experts 2 Signs Of Low Self-Esteem And The Root Causes You Might Not Know 3 How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship 4 How to Live in the Moment and Stop Worrying About the Past or Future 5 This Is What Happens When You Move Out Of the Comfort Zone

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      Last Updated on May 21, 2019

      How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

      How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

      For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

      If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

      Example 1

      You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

      You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

      In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

      Example 2

      You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

      People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

      You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

      Example 3

      You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

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      The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

      Example 4

      You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

      Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

      If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

      Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

      • Understand your own communication style
      • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
      • Communicate with precision and care
      • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

      1. Understand Your Communication Style

      To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

      In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

      Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

      2. Learn Others Communication Styles

      Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

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      If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

      “How do you prefer to receive information?”

      This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

      To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

      3. Exercise Precision and Care

      A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

      On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

      Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

      I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

      I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

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      In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

      The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

      Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

      4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

      Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

      In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

      “Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

      Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

      Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

      It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

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      It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

      It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

      Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

      Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

      The Bottom Line

      When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

      I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

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      Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

      Reference

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