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Last Updated on January 10, 2018

How To Keep The Conversation Going With Someone You’ve Just Met

How To Keep The Conversation Going With Someone You’ve Just Met

It happens often: you meet someone new, exchange smiles, say, “hi” or “hello,” and that’s it. Even if you are willing to continue the conversation, you run out of topics and later regret it. If this has happened to you, don’t worry–it’s completely normal. In this post, I will share with you a couple of methods and a few topics that can make your conversations continue in a smooth manner.

Methods and Discussion Topics

  • You can start with a basic, regular, “Hi! How are you?” This can be followed by appreciation of some of their belongings or traits, like their hair color, the suit they are wearing, the name of the company(if they are wearing an ID Card), or their smile or eyes. Remember that appreciation always lifts the mood of the one being appreciated.
  • Then you can make a comment about anything that’s happening nearby. For example, if you meet at some party, you can start with appreciating the adornment or ambiance. Then you can continue this by asking, “What do you think about it?”
  • Another good, timeless topic is the person’s education, whether it be college, high school or graduation. Everyone likes discussing their days as a student. Ninety-nine times out of 100, it cheers up the person’s mood. Let them speak. Be a patient listener.
  • You can always discuss the profession with which the person is associated (Art, Medical, Sports, Automobile). It will help continue the conversation, as you might learn about a whole new field. You can begin like, “Whats your profession? By the way I am a software Engineer.”
  • Next, you can ask about their workplace, the environment, company HR policies, or a bond agreement, or if they own a business, you can talk about their vision, perspective, future plans. For instance, you can start like, “How is the work environment in your company?” or “How about the HR policies? Are they flexible or tough?”
  • You can now come to their work profile. If you belong to a similar field, you can discuss the pros and cons, or if you are from another field, you can learn about the kind of work they do and find out if they enjoy doing it.
  • After talking about work, you can ask about their hometown, whether they grew up in the same city or somewhere else. If he or she is from same city, you can discuss some common and well-known places.  You can ask questions like, “Do you know of a good restaurant known for its continental food?” If he or she is from another city, you can ask about their place, like what are some famous tourist attractions of their city, famous foods, temples, or outing spots.
  • Then, after all this, you can ask about their likes and hobbies: “How you prefer spending your free time?” or “How you usually like to spend your weekends?”

Points to Remember

1. Along with asking questions, you should also answer the questions for yourself on every topic. Otherwise, it sounds more like stalking than making a conversation. For example, “I am an Artist,” or “I am new to this city. My native place is San Diego,” or “I love my job, but the HR policies of my company are not flexible,” or “I graduated from Cambridge University in Arts.”

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2. Humor is good, but do not overdo it in first meeting. It might not create a good impression.

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3. During the exchange of information, if you find something which you both have in common, you can expand on that particular topic. That way, you can learn more about each other. Common topics always create a bond which drives the conversation towards an interesting direction where both the participants are equally into it.

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Last Updated on September 17, 2018

7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

Relationships are complicated and when you’re unhappy, it can be difficult to tell what’s causing it and what needs to change.

Sometimes it’s as easy as opening up to your partner about your problems, while other times it may be necessary to switch partners or roll solo to get your mind straight.

When you’re in the thick of things, it can be difficult to tell if you’re unhappy in your relationship or just unhappy in general (in which case, a relationship may be just the cure you need).

Here’re signs of an unhappy relationship that is possibly making you feel stuck:

1. You’re depressed about your home life.

No matter what you do in life, you’re going to have good and bad days. Your relationship is no different.

However, no matter what you’re going through at home, you have to feel comfortable in your own home.

If you constantly dread going home because your significant other is there, there’s a problem. Maybe it’s something you already know about, everyone has an argument or just needs some alone time.

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When that yearning to be alone becomes an insatiable obsession over the course of months and years, it’s time to realize you’re not the exception to the rule.

You’re unhappy in your relationship, and you need to take a look in the mirror and do whatever it takes to make yourself smile.

2. You aren’t comfortable being yourself.

Remember all those things you discovered about yourself when you first got together? The way your partner made you feel when you met that made you fall in love with him or her in the first place.

If they don’t make you feel that way anymore, it’s not the end of the world. If your partner makes you uncomfortable about being you, then her or she is only dragging you down. It’s up to you to decide how to handle that.

You need to be comfortable with who you are. This means being comfortable in your skin and with the way you walk, talk, look, breath, move, and all the other things that make you uniquely you.

If the person who supposedly loves you doesn’t make you feel good about yourself, know that you can do better. They’re not even one in a billion.

3. You can’t stop snooping.

Mutual trust is necessary in any relationship. The only way to get that trust is with respect.

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I can find you anywhere online, no matter how private and secure you think you are. The odds of you having a password I can’t crack are slim. If we’ve met in person, I could install a remote key logger on your device without even touching it.

Finding your information online hardly takes a clandestine organization. Any idiot with a Wi-Fi-enabled device can cyberstalk you. I’m just the only idiot in the village admitting it.

So now that we know everyone snoops, it’s time to address your personal habits. Governments snoop because they don’t trust us. If you’re snooping on your partner, it’s because you don’t trust them.

It’s ok to have doubts, and it’s perfectly normal to look into anything that looks weird, but keep in mind that data collection is only half of an investigation.

If you find yourself constantly snooping and questioning everything, clearly there’s a trust issue and the relationship likely needs to end.

4. You’re afraid of commitment.

If you’ve been dating longer than a year and you aren’t engaged, it’s never going to happen.

Commitment is important. People will come up with a million ways to describe why they can’t be committed.

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No matter who you are if you like it, you need to put a ring on it. Find an engagement ring, stick a gemstone in it and marry the person. If you’re not legally able to get married or you don’t believe in it for one reason or another, have a child (or adopt one, however you’re able to) or treat your partner’s family like your own. It’s a huge financial and mental commitment.

If you’re not ready for one or the other after some time, don’t waste anymore of your precious life on the relationship.

Your relationship should be something that propels you forward. If it’s not going anywhere, make it an open relationship and call it what it is—dating multiple people.

5. You imagine a happier life without your partner.

If all you’re doing is imagining a happier life without your partner, it’s a sign that you’re in the wrong relationship. You’re unhappy and you need to get out.

Your partner should be included in your dreams. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a future with someone.

Try to remember what you dreamed of before you got your heart broken by the realities of life, love and the pursuit of human success.

Remember when you would crush on that cute kid in class? You would secretly imagine marrying him or her and going on an adventure—that’s the way life should be.

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If you’re not at least imagining adventures together, then why are you in that relationship?

6. You resent, rather than love your partner.

When a relationship starts to crumble, you begin to resent your partner for all the things you once loved about him or her.

When you’ve reached this point, your partner has reached at least No. 2 on this list. From your partner’s perspective, your unhappiness with them is picked up as bashing them for being who they are.

If you’re both unhappy in the relationship, it’s better if it ends as quickly and painlessly as possible.

7. You chase past feelings.

It’s okay to reminisce about the past, but if all you do is wish things were like they used to be, it’s a sign you’re not on the right path.

You’re unhappy and, at the very least, you need to have an open dialogue about it. This isn’t necessarily a sign that the relationship should end, but it definitely needs a spark.

When you talk to your partner candidly about what it is you’re looking for, you never know how they’ll react. The risk alone is worth it, good or bad.

Final thoughts

If you’re feeling stuck in your current relationship, it’s time to reflect about it with your partner. Don’t ignore these signs of an unhappy relationship as they will slowly go worse and harm both you and your partner in long-term.

Featured photo credit: josh peterson via unsplash.com

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