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How To Communicate With Irrational And Angry People

How To Communicate With Irrational And Angry People

Trying to get through to someone who is angry or acting irrationally can be very frustrating. It’s also easy to dismiss their anger or write them off. However, in business and in life that is not always an option.

There are some ways to defuse someone’s anger and bring them back into a more rational frame of mind. So here are a few simple things anyone can do to calm a situation down.

Don’t get worked up

Remain calm. When people are angry don’t respond with anger. This will make them feel their anger is justified and simply fuels further anger. This will escalate the situation. Your goal is to calm them down.

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Take a deep breath. Remember the person is not angry at you, but often with something completely different. You’re just the recipient of their free-floating hostility. Keep calm and they’ll work through the anger. They could just need someone to listen to them. Calmly hear them out and that could be all they need.

Put yourself in their shoes

You never know what is going on behind the doors of someone else’s life. This could be the worst day of their life. They could have gotten some terrible news. They could be dealing with a major life change. Listen to what they’re saying.

Try to put yourself into their situation for a just a moment. Think about how you’d feel if your cat just died or your significant other just dumped you or you lost your job. Everyone has bad days and on those days we have to talk to people. This could be one of those days.

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Be clear and concise

Language barriers and jargon can lead to frustration. If someone doesn’t speak the same language as you, be patient with them, they may not know all the words you do. Find smaller, simple words to ease the language barrier.

Each industry has its own terminology, it’s called jargon. And just because you understand what something means, there is no guarantee the person you’re talking to will. Try to avoid jargon and use plain language.

Use their name

People don’t like to be thought of as a number or just another faceless consumer. Address them by their name and make a personal connection. Try to make them special even in the tiniest of ways. Make them feel that you care about their problem and talk to them like a person.

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You’re here to help

Life is rough and we’re all in this together. Show them that you care. We all have days where we need someone to reach out and help us. The cause of anger or irrational behavior can be stress or sadness about something unrelated.

Empathize with the person and let them see that you care. You feel their pain. You understand the anger and you’re here to help them out. They have a problem and you’re here to fix it.

There is no better feeling than when someone is taking care of you. I’ve seen anger melt away when the person knew I was there to solve their problems and make things better for them. Be that problem solver!

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Realize sometimes there is no winning

Sometimes, no matter how hard you try, there is no way to get through to someone being irrational. If they’re irrational and angry they may just need to vent and get it out of their system. In this case, just let them do so. Endure the fury and once they’ve let the anger go, they may be much more reasonable.

Unfortunately, there are some cases where no matter what you do, you still won’t get through to them. In this case, let it go. You can only do as much as you can.

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Last Updated on February 13, 2019

10 Things Happy People Do Differently

10 Things Happy People Do Differently

Think being happy is something that happens as a result of luck, circumstance, having money, etc.? Think again.

Happiness is a mindset. And if you’re looking to improve your ability to find happiness, then check out these 10 things happy people do differently.

Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions. -Dalai Lama

1. Happy people find balance in their lives.

Folks who are happy have this in common: they’re content with what they have, and don’t waste a whole lot of time worrying and stressing over things they don’t. Unhappy people do the opposite: they spend too much time thinking about what they don’t have. Happy people lead balanced lives. This means they make time for all the things that are important to them, whether it’s family, friends, career, health, religion, etc.

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2. Happy people abide by the golden rule.

You know that saying you heard when you were a kid, “Do unto others as you would have them do to you.” Well, happy people truly embody this principle. They treat others with respect. They’re sensitive to the thoughts and feelings of other people. They’re compassionate. And they get treated this way (most of the time) in return.

3. Happy people don’t sweat the small stuff.

One of the biggest things happy people do differently compared to unhappy people is they let stuff go. Bad things happen to good people sometimes. Happy people realize this, are able to take things in stride, and move on. Unhappy people tend to dwell on minor inconveniences and issues, which can perpetuate feelings of sadness, guilt, resentment, greed, and anger.

4. Happy people take responsibility for their actions.

Happy people aren’t perfect, and they’re well aware of that. When they screw up, they admit it. They recognize their faults and work to improve on them. Unhappy people tend to blame others and always find an excuse why things aren’t going their way. Happy people, on the other hand, live by the mantra:

“There are two types of people in the world: those that do and those that make excuses why they don’t.”

5. Happy people surround themselves with other happy people.

happiness surrounding

    One defining characteristic of happy people is they tend to hang out with other happy people. Misery loves company, and unhappy people gravitate toward others who share their negative sentiments. If you’re struggling with a bout of sadness, depression, worry, or anger, spend more time with your happiest friends or family members. Chances are, you’ll find that their positive attitude rubs off on you.

    6. Happy people are honest with themselves and others.

    People who are happy often exhibit the virtues of honesty and trustworthiness. They would rather give you candid feedback, even when the truth hurts, and they expect the same in return. Happy people respect people who give them an honest opinion.

    7. Happy people show signs of happiness.

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    smile

      This one may sound obvious but it’s a key differentiator between happy and unhappy people. Think about your happiest friends. Chances are, the mental image you form is of them smiling, laughing, and appearing genuinely happy. On the flip side, those who aren’t happy tend to look the part. Their posture may be slouched and you may perceive a lack of confidence.

      8. Happy people are passionate.

      Another thing happy people have in common is their ability to find their passions in life and pursue those passions to the fullest. Happy people have found what they’re looking for, and they spend their time doing what they love.

      9. Happy people see challenges as opportunities.

      Folks who are happy accept challenges and use them as opportunities to learn and grow. They turn negatives into positives and make the best out of seemingly bad situations. They don’t dwell on things that are out of their control; rather, they seek solutions and creative ways of overcoming obstacles.

      10. Happy people live in the present.

      While unhappy people tend to dwell on the past and worry about the future, happy people live in the moment. They are grateful for “the now” and focus their efforts on living life to the fullest in the present. Their philosophy is:

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      There’s a reason it’s called “the present.” Because life is a gift.

      So if you’d like to bring a little more happiness into your life, think about the 10 principles above and how you can use them to make yourself better.

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