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Heart Melt! 10 Proposal Ideas From Movies You Should Copy And Paste!

Heart Melt! 10 Proposal Ideas From Movies You Should Copy And Paste!

You knew that someday this moment would come: The proposal.

She’s yours, you’re in love and you are ready to “take it to the next level”. She is looking for your promise for “forever” and you don’t want to let her get away.

But you have this lump in your gut that tells you doing it right is important to her – actually, to both of you.  And there is that niggling fear that warns you not to be overly confident. She could surprise you with, “No”.

So, here’s some advice from the big screen. Ladies hearts melt when they watch this stuff so why not let what you can learn here give you clues to building your own perfect proposal ideas. And remember, it’s not the where or how – it’s so much more about what she senses in your words and from your heart.

1. Proposal Idea from “How Do You Know?” with Reese Witherspoon.

Watch how Annie is searching his face to interpret his meaning though he isn’t perfect with his words. He tells her two important things: he “gets” her and he fears that someone else might not and then she would be miserable.

So, as much as he knows he may not be the ideal catch, he wants to be the one to take care of her. And that’s all it takes. She melts into a puddle.

    2.  Proposal Idea from “Leap Year”

    In this movie Anna had finally made it clear that she wanted to marry him – in fact, she asked him. But Jeremy turned it around so he could ask her.

    The result is that it reassured her that he was fully on board which, down the road, will be a very important fact for both of them to know. The observation here is that even if you “talk” a lot about marriage, make the effort to be the one to ask her. It means the world to her.

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      3.  Proposal Idea from “The Prince Of Persia”

      The one tip you can take from this proposal is to step up and into what you are meant to do and be. A woman wants to know the man she loves is going somewhere, has a destiny all on his own. Confidence is sexy and a heart melt move that will win her over every time.

      She wants to know that you are willing to earn her trust – no matter how long it takes or what you have to do.

        4.  Proposal Idea from “When Harry Met Sally”

        The relationship between Harry and Sally had been a rocky on-and-off-again relationship.

        The first thing that Harry does here is to decide. He wants her for the rest of his life. However, to start with, he blew the proposal. Telling a woman you love her and need her isn’t enough – especially if things haven’t always run smoothly.

        But then he forgot his head and began to talk from his heart. This is what she needed. He told her how well he knew her and that he loved every little thing about her – even the ones that drove him crazy.

          5.  Proposal Idea from “The Wedding Singer”

          Robbie came after Julia. That alone said more to her than words ever could.

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          Then he did what he needed to do to win her heart – jumped on a plane, wrote a song. Your creativity may be anchored in something else – use it!  When you go to extra lengths to express your love and set up the “moment”, her heart will truly melt.

            6.  Proposal Idea from “Love Actually”

            These two fell in love even though they couldn’t speak the same language. Jamie changed that by taking his time and making the extreme effort it takes to learn how to talk to her.

            You know, you may both speak English but you need to learn what your lady wants to be understood. When you go to any trouble at all to prove that you are serious about knowing everything about her and doing what it takes, the doubts about trusting you with her future will be erased.

              7.  Proposal Idea from “Pride and Prejudice”

              Misunderstandings happen. What won Elizabeth’s trust was discovering that Mr. Darcy was a good man, a man of character who wasn’t perfect but was, from within, someone who took care of those he loved. His motives behind his actions were admirable. She heard and observed this, not from him, but from others.

              You don’t have to come to her with perfection, but you do need to offer sincerity.

              She wants to know that you are capable of growing with her, that you have a strength in you that is continually maturing. That’s why women love movie heroes – the stories reveal the depth of good men.

              Your values and what you stand for say everything about you. Who you are will win her heart before any word comes out of your mouth.

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                8.  Proposal Idea from “He’s Not That Into You”

                Neil was so afraid to get married that he refused to. But Beth longed for the commitment, the safety of the traditional ties.  hey broke up over it  even though they had been together for a lengthy time. In the end, she did what most women do – she gave in because she loved him and decided to accept him as he was.

                You see here, in this scene he gives her the world by choosing her happiness over his own. In his proposal he says, “I want to make you happy – for me to even have a shot at being happy.”

                  9.  Proposal Idea from “The Notebook”

                  Allie had been away for a long time and engaged to someone else. But she hadn’t quite closed the door. Re-connecting was magnetic and so complicated.

                  So he laid it all out on the table – he saw into her confusion. He knew that one of the things he loved about her – her compassion, her reluctance to hurt anyone – was the very thing that was keeping her from her own happiness.

                  Willing to let her go if that’s what she really wanted, he used his logic to cut to the chase – something that, emotionally, she was having trouble seeing.

                  It looked as if she didn’t want him and the worst happened. He had to let her go.

                  But she accepts. She came back. He had helped her to see clearly. He had put the deep question to her and released her. She faced herself, her own heart, and it melted.

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                  Despite the consequences, the story of their love trumped everything and she knew what she had to do.

                  In this proposal, a precedent was set.  Two strong individuals made a firm decision to be together, determined to know each other and build on a lava-like passion. The doubts were resolved in favor of a wonderfully firm commitment.

                    10.  Proposal Idea from “Happily Ever After”

                    In the remake of the classic Cinderella story, the Prince comes to rescue her but she has already rescued herself.  She is a strong and independent type of woman but that doesn’t change the fact that, when he kneels in front of her, not as a Prince but as a “man in love”, as he puts it, she feels complete.

                    She is overwhelmed by the fact that he still wants her even after she hid her real self from him. He wanted her! He looked beyond her flaws and saw the real person inside.

                    He wins her commitment to him because he proves that he can accept her, even at her worst.

                      Heart melt tips in summary:

                      • Prove you love the person inside her, that you see her and who she really is and love her for that. Observe her always. Be specific about what you love about her and list those things.
                      • Go above and beyond with what you need to set up for the moment you ask her to marry you. Make it as romantic as you can. Research, ask others what they did. Be creative and use your own talents if you can. It will be a story she brags about forever!
                      • Be a man. Take charge of your own life and let her know that you have a plan to take care of both of you. It will make her feel safe and confident.
                      • Focus on building your character. Develop your strengths by becoming the best provider and protector you can be. Live out whatever values you hold as important such as honesty, trust, loyalty, integrity, unconditional caring. Let her see who you truly are.
                      • Admit that you may not be perfect but you are and always will be willing to learn.
                      • Come to her on one knee, swear to take care of her no matter what and then do it. Get her a sweater if she is cold, cuddle her if she needs it, let her cry on your shoulder, allow her to spout off and listen for her fears underneath her words. Never get tired of telling her how much you love her even when she’s frustrating. Let her know what hurts you and be quick to ask what you can do to make up for times when you hurt her.
                      • Above all else, admire her. Adore her. Cherish her. Let her know through your eyes, your words and your arms how much you love her.

                      If you work toward even a small portion of this, you will find your lady melting for you, not only when you propose but over and over for life!

                      Featured photo credit: Copyright: saksoni / 123RF Stock Photo via 123rf.com

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                      Last Updated on October 22, 2020

                      8 Simple Ways to Be a Better Listener

                      8 Simple Ways to Be a Better Listener

                      How would you feel if you were sharing a personal story and noticed that the person to whom you were speaking wasn’t really listening? You probably wouldn’t be too thrilled.

                      Unfortunately, that is the case for many people. Most individuals are not good listeners. They are good pretenders. The thing is, true listening requires work—more work than people are willing to invest. Quality conversation is about “give and take.” Most people, however, want to just give—their words, that is. Being on the receiving end as the listener may seem boring, but it’s essential.

                      When you are attending to someone and paying attention to what they’re saying, it’s a sign of caring and respect. The hitch is that attending requires an act of will, which sometimes goes against what our minds naturally do—roaming around aimlessly and thinking about whatnot, instead of listening—the greatest act of thoughtfulness.

                      Without active listening, people often feel unheard and unacknowledged. That’s why it’s important for everyone to learn how to be a better listener.

                      What Makes People Poor Listeners?

                      Good listening skills can be learned, but first, let’s take a look at some of the things that you might be doing that makes you a poor listener.

                      1. You Want to Talk to Yourself

                      Well, who doesn’t? We all have something to say, right? But when you are looking at someone pretending to be listening while, all along, they’re mentally planning all the amazing things they’re going to say, it is a disservice to the speaker.

                      Yes, maybe what the other person is saying is not the most exciting thing in the world. Still, they deserve to be heard. You always have the ability to steer the conversation in another direction by asking questions.

                      It’s okay to want to talk. It’s normal, even. Keep in mind, however, that when your turn does come around, you’ll want someone to listen to you.

                      2. You Disagree With What Is Being Said

                      This is another thing that makes you an inadequate listener—hearing something with which you disagree with and immediately tuning out. Then, you lie in wait so you can tell the speaker how wrong they are. You’re eager to make your point and prove the speaker wrong. You think that once you speak your “truth,” others will know how mistaken the speaker is, thank you for setting them straight, and encourage you to elaborate on what you have to say. Dream on.

                      Disagreeing with your speaker, however frustrating that might be, is no reason to tune them out and ready yourself to spew your staggering rebuttal. By listening, you might actually glean an interesting nugget of information that you were previously unaware of.

                      3. You Are Doing Five Other Things While You’re “Listening”

                      It is impossible to listen to someone while you’re texting, reading, playing Sudoku, etc. But people do it all the time—I know I have.

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                      I’ve actually tried to balance my checkbook while pretending to listen to the person on the other line. It didn’t work. I had to keep asking, “what did you say?” I can only admit this now because I rarely do it anymore. With work, I’ve succeeded in becoming a better listener. It takes a great deal of concentration, but it’s certainly worth it.

                      If you’re truly going to listen, then you must: listen! M. Scott Peck, M.D., in his book The Road Less Travel, says, “you cannot truly listen to anyone and do anything else at the same time.” If you are too busy to actually listen, let the speaker know, and arrange for another time to talk. It’s simple as that!

                      4. You Appoint Yourself as Judge

                      While you’re “listening,” you decide that the speaker doesn’t know what they’re talking about. As the “expert,” you know more. So, what’s the point of even listening?

                      To you, the only sound you hear once you decide they’re wrong is, “Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah!” But before you bang that gavel, just know you may not have all the necessary information. To do that, you’d have to really listen, wouldn’t you? Also, make sure you don’t judge someone by their accent, the way they sound, or the structure of their sentences.

                      My dad is nearly 91. His English is sometimes a little broken and hard to understand. People wrongly assume that he doesn’t know what he’s talking about—they’re quite mistaken. My dad is a highly intelligent man who has English as his second language. He knows what he’s saying and understands the language perfectly.

                      Keep that in mind when listening to a foreigner, or someone who perhaps has a difficult time putting their thoughts into words.

                      Now, you know some of the things that make for an inferior listener. If none of the items above resonate with you, great! You’re a better listener than most.

                      How To Be a Better Listener

                      For conversation’s sake, though, let’s just say that maybe you need some work in the listening department, and after reading this article, you make the decision to improve. What, then, are some of the things you need to do to make that happen? How can you be a better listener?

                      1. Pay Attention

                      A good listener is attentive. They’re not looking at their watch, phone, or thinking about their dinner plans. They’re focused and paying attention to what the other person is saying. This is called active listening.

                      According to Skills You Need, “active listening involves listening with all senses. As well as giving full attention to the speaker, it is important that the ‘active listener’ is also ‘seen’ to be listening—otherwise, the speaker may conclude that what they are talking about is uninteresting to the listener.”[1]

                      As I mentioned, it’s normal for the mind to wander. We’re human, after all. But a good listener will rein those thoughts back in as soon as they notice their attention waning.

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                      I want to note here that you can also “listen” to bodily cues. You can assume that if someone keeps looking at their watch or over their shoulder, their focus isn’t on the conversation. The key is to just pay attention.

                      2. Use Positive Body Language

                      You can infer a lot from a person’s body language. Are they interested, bored, or anxious?

                      A good listener’s body language is open. They lean forward and express curiosity in what is being said. Their facial expression is either smiling, showing concern, conveying empathy, etc. They’re letting the speaker know that they’re being heard.

                      People say things for a reason—they want some type of feedback. For example, you tell your spouse, “I had a really rough day!” and your husband continues to check his newsfeed while nodding his head. Not a good response.

                      But what if your husband were to look up with questioning eyes, put his phone down, and say, “Oh, no. What happened?” How would feel, then? The answer is obvious.

                      According to Alan Gurney,[2]

                      “An active listener pays full attention to the speaker and ensures they understand the information being delivered. You can’t be distracted by an incoming call or a Facebook status update. You have to be present and in the moment.

                      Body language is an important tool to ensure you do this. The correct body language makes you a better active listener and therefore more ‘open’ and receptive to what the speaker is saying. At the same time, it indicates that you are listening to them.”

                      3. Avoid Interrupting the Speaker

                      I am certain you wouldn’t want to be in the middle of a sentence only to see the other person holding up a finger or their mouth open, ready to step into your unfinished verbiage. It’s rude and causes anxiety. You would, more than likely, feel a need to rush what you’re saying just to finish your sentence.

                      Interrupting is a sign of disrespect. It is essentially saying, “what I have to say is much more important than what you’re saying.” When you interrupt the speaker, they feel frustrated, hurried, and unimportant.

                      Interrupting a speaker to agree, disagree, argue, etc., causes the speaker to lose track of what they are saying. It’s extremely frustrating. Whatever you have to say can wait until the other person is done.

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                      Be polite and wait your turn!

                      4. Ask Questions

                      Asking questions is one of the best ways to show you’re interested. If someone is telling you about their ski trip to Mammoth, don’t respond with, “that’s nice.” That would show a lack of interest and disrespect. Instead, you can ask, “how long have you been skiing?” “Did you find it difficult to learn?” “What was your favorite part of the trip?” etc. The person will think highly of you and consider you a great conversationalist just by you asking a few questions.

                      5. Just Listen

                      This may seem counterintuitive. When you’re conversing with someone, it’s usually back and forth. On occasion, all that is required of you is to listen, smile, or nod your head, and your speaker will feel like they’re really being heard and understood.

                      I once sat with a client for 45 minutes without saying a word. She came into my office in distress. I had her sit down, and then she started crying softly. I sat with her—that’s all I did. At the end of the session, she stood, told me she felt much better, and then left.

                      I have to admit that 45 minutes without saying a word was tough. But she didn’t need me to say anything. She needed a safe space in which she could emote without interruption, judgment, or me trying to “fix” something.

                      6. Remember and Follow Up

                      Part of being a great listener is remembering what the speaker has said to you, then following up with them.

                      For example, in a recent conversation you had with your co-worker Jacob, he told you that his wife had gotten a promotion and that they were contemplating moving to New York. The next time you run into Jacob, you may want to say, “Hey, Jacob! Whatever happened with your wife’s promotion?” At this point, Jacob will know you really heard what he said and that you’re interested to see how things turned out. What a gift!

                      According to new research, “people who ask questions, particularly follow-up questions, may become better managers, land better jobs, and even win second dates.”[3]

                      It’s so simple to show you care. Just remember a few facts and follow up on them. If you do this regularly, you will make more friends.

                      7. Keep Confidential Information Confidential

                      If you really want to be a better listener, listen with care. If what you’re hearing is confidential, keep it that way, no matter how tempting it might be to tell someone else, especially if you have friends in common. Being a good listener means being trustworthy and sensitive with shared information.

                      Whatever is told to you in confidence is not to be revealed. Assure your speaker that their information is safe with you. They will feel relieved that they have someone with whom they can share their burden without fear of it getting out.

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                      Keeping someone’s confidence helps to deepen your relationship. Also, “one of the most important elements of confidentiality is that it helps to build and develop trust. It potentially allows for the free flow of information between the client and worker and acknowledges that a client’s personal life and all the issues and problems that they have belong to them.”[4]

                      Be like a therapist: listen and withhold judgment.

                      NOTE: I must add here that while therapists keep everything in a session confidential, there are exceptions:

                      1. If the client may be an immediate danger to himself or others.
                      2. If the client is endangering a population that cannot protect itself, such as in the case of a child or elder abuse.

                      8. Maintain Eye Contact

                      When someone is talking, they are usually saying something they consider meaningful. They don’t want their listener reading a text, looking at their fingernails, or bending down to pet a pooch on the street. A speaker wants all eyes on them. It lets them know that what they’re saying has value.

                      Eye contact is very powerful. It can relay many things without anything being said. Currently, it’s more important than ever with the Covid-19 Pandemic. People can’t see your whole face, but they can definitely read your eyes.

                      By eye contact, I don’t mean a hard, creepy stare—just a gaze in the speaker’s direction will do. Make it a point the next time you’re in a conversation to maintain eye contact with your speaker. Avoid the temptation to look anywhere but at their face. I know it’s not easy, especially if you’re not interested in what they’re talking about. But as I said, you can redirect the conversation in a different direction or just let the person know you’ve got to get going.

                      Final Thoughts

                      Listening attentively will add to your connection with anyone in your life. Now, more than ever, when people are so disconnected due to smartphones and social media, listening skills are critical.

                      You can build better, more honest, and deeper relationships by simply being there, paying attention, and asking questions that make the speaker feel like what they have to say matters.

                      And isn’t that a great goal? To make people feel as if they matter? So, go out and start honing those listening skills. You’ve got two great ears. Now use them!

                      More Tips on How to Be a Better Listener

                      Featured photo credit: Joshua Rodriguez via unsplash.com

                      Reference

                      [1] Skills You Need: Active Listening
                      [2] Filtered: Body language for active listening
                      [3] Forbes: People Will Like You More If You Start Asking Follow-up Questions
                      [4] TAFE NSW Sydney eLearning Moodle: Confidentiality

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