You knew that someday this moment would come: The proposal.
She’s yours, you’re in love and you are ready to “take it to the next level”. She is looking for your promise for “forever” and you don’t want to let her get away.
But you have this lump in your gut that tells you doing it right is important to her – actually, to both of you. And there is that niggling fear that warns you not to be overly confident. She could surprise you with, “No”.
So, here’s some advice from the big screen. Ladies hearts melt when they watch this stuff so why not let what you can learn here give you clues to building your own perfect proposal ideas. And remember, it’s not the where or how – it’s so much more about what she senses in your words and from your heart.
1. Proposal Idea from “How Do You Know?” with Reese Witherspoon.
Watch how Annie is searching his face to interpret his meaning though he isn’t perfect with his words. He tells her two important things: he “gets” her and he fears that someone else might not and then she would be miserable.
So, as much as he knows he may not be the ideal catch, he wants to be the one to take care of her. And that’s all it takes. She melts into a puddle.
2. Proposal Idea from “Leap Year”
In this movie Anna had finally made it clear that she wanted to marry him – in fact, she asked him. But Jeremy turned it around so he could ask her.
The result is that it reassured her that he was fully on board which, down the road, will be a very important fact for both of them to know. The observation here is that even if you “talk” a lot about marriage, make the effort to be the one to ask her. It means the world to her.
3. Proposal Idea from “The Prince Of Persia”
The one tip you can take from this proposal is to step up and into what you are meant to do and be. A woman wants to know the man she loves is going somewhere, has a destiny all on his own. Confidence is sexy and a heart melt move that will win her over every time.
She wants to know that you are willing to earn her trust – no matter how long it takes or what you have to do.
4. Proposal Idea from “When Harry Met Sally”
The relationship between Harry and Sally had been a rocky on-and-off-again relationship.
The first thing that Harry does here is to decide. He wants her for the rest of his life. However, to start with, he blew the proposal. Telling a woman you love her and need her isn’t enough – especially if things haven’t always run smoothly.
But then he forgot his head and began to talk from his heart. This is what she needed. He told her how well he knew her and that he loved every little thing about her – even the ones that drove him crazy.
5. Proposal Idea from “The Wedding Singer”
Robbie came after Julia. That alone said more to her than words ever could.
Then he did what he needed to do to win her heart – jumped on a plane, wrote a song. Your creativity may be anchored in something else – use it! When you go to extra lengths to express your love and set up the “moment”, her heart will truly melt.
6. Proposal Idea from “Love Actually”
These two fell in love even though they couldn’t speak the same language. Jamie changed that by taking his time and making the extreme effort it takes to learn how to talk to her.
You know, you may both speak English but you need to learn what your lady wants to be understood. When you go to any trouble at all to prove that you are serious about knowing everything about her and doing what it takes, the doubts about trusting you with her future will be erased.
7. Proposal Idea from “Pride and Prejudice”
Misunderstandings happen. What won Elizabeth’s trust was discovering that Mr. Darcy was a good man, a man of character who wasn’t perfect but was, from within, someone who took care of those he loved. His motives behind his actions were admirable. She heard and observed this, not from him, but from others.
You don’t have to come to her with perfection, but you do need to offer sincerity.
She wants to know that you are capable of growing with her, that you have a strength in you that is continually maturing. That’s why women love movie heroes – the stories reveal the depth of good men.
Your values and what you stand for say everything about you. Who you are will win her heart before any word comes out of your mouth.
8. Proposal Idea from “He’s Not That Into You”
Neil was so afraid to get married that he refused to. But Beth longed for the commitment, the safety of the traditional ties. hey broke up over it even though they had been together for a lengthy time. In the end, she did what most women do – she gave in because she loved him and decided to accept him as he was.
You see here, in this scene he gives her the world by choosing her happiness over his own. In his proposal he says, “I want to make you happy – for me to even have a shot at being happy.”
9. Proposal Idea from “The Notebook”
Allie had been away for a long time and engaged to someone else. But she hadn’t quite closed the door. Re-connecting was magnetic and so complicated.
So he laid it all out on the table – he saw into her confusion. He knew that one of the things he loved about her – her compassion, her reluctance to hurt anyone – was the very thing that was keeping her from her own happiness.
Willing to let her go if that’s what she really wanted, he used his logic to cut to the chase – something that, emotionally, she was having trouble seeing.
It looked as if she didn’t want him and the worst happened. He had to let her go.
But she accepts. She came back. He had helped her to see clearly. He had put the deep question to her and released her. She faced herself, her own heart, and it melted.
Despite the consequences, the story of their love trumped everything and she knew what she had to do.
In this proposal, a precedent was set. Two strong individuals made a firm decision to be together, determined to know each other and build on a lava-like passion. The doubts were resolved in favor of a wonderfully firm commitment.
10. Proposal Idea from “Happily Ever After”
In the remake of the classic Cinderella story, the Prince comes to rescue her but she has already rescued herself. She is a strong and independent type of woman but that doesn’t change the fact that, when he kneels in front of her, not as a Prince but as a “man in love”, as he puts it, she feels complete.
She is overwhelmed by the fact that he still wants her even after she hid her real self from him. He wanted her! He looked beyond her flaws and saw the real person inside.
He wins her commitment to him because he proves that he can accept her, even at her worst.
Heart melt tips in summary:
- Prove you love the person inside her, that you see her and who she really is and love her for that. Observe her always. Be specific about what you love about her and list those things.
- Go above and beyond with what you need to set up for the moment you ask her to marry you. Make it as romantic as you can. Research, ask others what they did. Be creative and use your own talents if you can. It will be a story she brags about forever!
- Be a man. Take charge of your own life and let her know that you have a plan to take care of both of you. It will make her feel safe and confident.
- Focus on building your character. Develop your strengths by becoming the best provider and protector you can be. Live out whatever values you hold as important such as honesty, trust, loyalty, integrity, unconditional caring. Let her see who you truly are.
- Admit that you may not be perfect but you are and always will be willing to learn.
- Come to her on one knee, swear to take care of her no matter what and then do it. Get her a sweater if she is cold, cuddle her if she needs it, let her cry on your shoulder, allow her to spout off and listen for her fears underneath her words. Never get tired of telling her how much you love her even when she’s frustrating. Let her know what hurts you and be quick to ask what you can do to make up for times when you hurt her.
- Above all else, admire her. Adore her. Cherish her. Let her know through your eyes, your words and your arms how much you love her.
If you work toward even a small portion of this, you will find your lady melting for you, not only when you propose but over and over for life!
Featured photo credit: sergey mikheev via unsplash.com