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What You Could Do To Get Over Disappointments If You Were Leonardo DiCaprio

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What You Could Do To Get Over Disappointments If You Were Leonardo DiCaprio

Poor, poor Leo.

The 86th Academy Awards marked the 20th anniversary of Leonardo DiCaprio’s first Oscar nomination. Unfortunately, it was also the fourth time he went home empty-handed. Despite being one of the most bankable actors in Hollywood, that little golden statue continues to allude him over two decades into his wildly successful career. Here is the history behind Leo’s Oscar losses:

1994

Nominated for What’s Eating Gilbert Grape as “best supporting actor,” but lost to Tommy Lee Jones for The Fugitive.

2005

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Nominated for The Aviator as “best actor” but lost to Jamie Foxx in Ray.

2007

Nominated for Blood Diamond as “best actor” but lost to Forest Whitaker for The Last King of Scotland.

2014

Nominated for The Wolf of Wall Street as “best actor” but lost to Matthew McConaughey for Dallas Buyers Club.

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After so many years of Academy Awards shaped disappointment, Leo may need some tips on how to get past it and cheer up. But these aren’t exclusively life hacks for the rich and famous. If they were, my list would consist of:

  • Roll around naked in your piles of money
  • Go yachting with models (again).
  • Stand perfectly still whilst millions of fans scream accolades at you
  • Think about how you get paid millions of dollars to indulge in your passion for a living
  • Bask in your own talent and brilliance

No. These tips are ones that even us ordinary plebs can apply to our everyday lives.

1. Let It All Out

    It’s okay to be disappointed. Allow yourself to feel it, and do so without the hidden agenda of trying to speed up the grieving process. Wallowing in your pain is the best way to both move on and to reflect properly in the future. Whether you need to scream, cry or head on down to the shooting range, do what you gotta do.

    2. Ignore Your Critics

      Whether they be professional critics, co-workers, friends or even yourself; ignore them. Disappointments don’t mean failure and you should always persevere if you really want something. Remember, success is one percent talent, 99 perspiration.

      3. Get Some Perspective

        Okay, so I know you may want to smack the crap out of the people who say “it’s not the end of the world.” I get it, they’re annoying. They do, however, have a point. You need to get some perspective on the situation and ask if it will really matter that much in the long run. It’s a mere setback, not a permanent road block.

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        4. Really Get Some Perspective

          If the last tip didn’t work, think about this: is your problem or disappointment really that bad? There are people out there without a roof over their heads. Others don’t have access to clean water sources or regular food. Some people live without basic human rights simply because of who they are or where they were born. Now tell me again about how much your life supposedly sucks.

          5. Be Grateful

            Now that you have some perspective, it’s time to be grateful for what you have. Think about how lucky you are to have what you do, and start thinking about hat resources you have to improve your own situation. I’m willing to be you have access to a lot more future opportunities than you realized.

            6. Stop Wallowing

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              I know I said that you need to take time to mourn—just don’t take too much time. There’s a distinct difference between taking the time to feel your hurt or disappointment and just plain wasting time. Don’t let yourself get stuck in a rut you can’t haul yourself out of. Feel it, sure; but know when it’s time to buckle up and move on.

              7. Persevere

                Life will throw many a setback at you; don’t let it get you down. I’m sure this isn’t your first disappointment and it certainly wont be your last. Now that you’ve taken the time to wallow and reflect, you need to plan your next move and get back out there. Never give up on your goals and dreams.

                More by this author

                Tegan Jones

                Tegan is a passionate journalist, writer and editor. She writes about lifestyle tips on Lifehack.

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                Last Updated on November 18, 2021

                10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

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                10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

                We all fall into the trap of judging a person’s character by their appearance. How wrong we are! All too often, the real character of the person only appears when some negative event hits them or you. Then you may see a toxic person emerging from the ruins and it is often a shock.

                A truly frightening example is revealed in the book by O’Toole in Bowman called Dangerous Instincts: How Gut Instincts Betray Us. A perfectly respectable, charming, well dressed neighbor was found to have installed a torture chamber in his garage where he was systematically abusing kidnapped women. This is an extreme example, but it does show how we can be totally deceived by a person’s physical appearance, manners and behavior.

                So, what can you do? You want to be able to assess personal qualities when you come into contact with colleagues, fresh acquaintances and new friends who might even become lifelong partners. You want to know if they are:

                • honest
                • reliable
                • competent
                • kind and compassionate
                • capable of taking the blame
                • able to persevere
                • modest and humble
                • pacific and can control anger.

                The secret is to reserve judgment and take your time. Observe them in certain situations; look at how they react. Listen to them talking, joking, laughing, explaining, complaining, blaming, praising, ranting, and preaching. Only then will you be able to judge their character. This is not foolproof, but if you follow the 10 ways below, you have a pretty good chance of not ending up in an abusive relationship.

                1. Is anger a frequent occurrence?

                All too often, angry reactions which may seem to be excessive are a sign that there are underlying issues. Do not think that every person who just snaps and throws his/her weight around mentally and physically is just reacting normally. Everyone has an occasional angry outburst when driving or when things go pear-shaped.

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                But if this is almost a daily occurrence, then you need to discover why and maybe avoid that person. Too often, anger will escalate to violent and aggressive behavior. You do not want to be near someone who thinks violence can solve personal or global problems.

                2. Can you witness acts of kindness?

                How often do you see this person being kind and considerate? Do they give money to beggars, donate to charity, do voluntary work or in some simple way show that they are willing to share the planet with about 7 billion other people?

                I was shocked when a guest of mine never showed any kindness to the weak and disadvantaged people in our town. She was ostensibly a religious person, but I began to doubt the sincerity of her beliefs.

                “The best index to a person’s character is how he treats people who can’t do him any good, and how he treats people who can’t fight back.”

                Abigail Van Buren

                3. How does this person take the blame?

                Maybe you know that s/he is responsible for a screw-up in the office or even in not turning up on time for a date. Look at their reaction. If they start blaming other colleagues or the traffic, well, this is an indication that they are not willing to take responsibility for their mistakes.

                4. Don’t use Facebook as an indicator.

                You will be relieved to know that graphology (the study of that forgotten skill of handwriting) is no longer considered a reliable test of a person’s character. Neither is Facebook stalking, fortunately. A study showed that Facebook use of foul language, sexual innuendo and gossip were not reliable indicators of a candidate’s character or future performance in the workplace.

                5. Read their emails.

                Now a much better idea is to read the person’s emails. Studies show that the use of the following can indicate certain personality traits:

                • Too many exclamation points may reveal a sunny disposition
                • Frequent errors may indicate apathy
                • Use of smileys is the only way a person can smile at you
                • Use of the third person may reveal a certain formality
                • Too many question marks can show anger
                • Overuse of capital letters is regarded as shouting. They are a definite no-no in netiquette, yet a surprising number of  people still use them.

                6. Watch out for the show offs.

                Listen to people as they talk. How often do they mention their achievements, promotions, awards and successes? If this happens a lot, it is a sure indication that this person has an over-inflated view of his/her achievements. They are unlikely to be modest or show humility. What a pity!  Another person to avoid.

                7. Look for evidence of perseverance.

                A powerful indicator of grit and tenacity is when a person persists and never gives up when they really want to achieve a life goal. Look for evidence of them keeping going in spite of enormous difficulties.

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                Great achievements by scientists and inventors all bear the hallmark of perseverance. We only have to think of Einstein, Edison (who failed thousands of times) and Nelson Mandela to get inspiration. The US Department of Education is in no doubt about how grit, tenacity and perseverance will be key success factors for youth in the 21st century.

                8. Their empathy score is high.

                Listen to how they talk about the less fortunate members of our society such as the poor, immigrants and the disabled. Do you notice that they talk in a compassionate way about these people? The fact that they even mention them is a strong indicator of empathy.

                People with zero empathy will never talk about the disadvantaged. They will rarely ask you a question about a difficult time or relationship. They will usually steer the conversation back to themselves. These people have zero empathy and in extreme cases, they are psychopaths who never show any feelings towards their victims.

                9. Learn how to be socially interactive.

                We are social animals and this is what makes us so uniquely human. If a person is isolated or a loner, this may be a negative indicator of their character. You want to meet a person who knows about trust, honesty and loyalty. The only way to practice these great qualities is to actually interact socially. The great advantage is that you can share problems and celebrate success and joy together.

                “One can acquire everything in solitude, except character.”

                Stendhal

                 10. Avoid toxic people.

                These people are trying to control others and often are failing to come to terms with their own failures. Typical behavior and conversations may concern:

                • Envy or jealousy
                • Criticism of partners, colleagues and friends
                • Complaining about their own lack of success
                • Blaming others for their own bad luck or failure
                • Obsession with themselves and their problems

                Listen to these people talk and you will quickly discover that you need to avoid them at all costs because their negativity will drag you down. In addition, as much as you would like to help them, you are not qualified to do so.

                Now, having looked at some of the best ways to judge a person, what about yourself? How do others see you? Why not take Dr. Phil’s quiz and find out. Can you bear it?

                Featured photo credit: Jacek Dylag via unsplash.com

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