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Do You Need A Personal Business Card?

Do You Need A Personal Business Card?

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    I have a business card collection. It started out unintentionally: I have one box that I throw any business cards into, after I add the relevant contact information to my address book. Every so often, though, I like to go through my little box and take a look at what the current trends for business cards are. Of course, there are some major differences between industries, but I have noticed some interesting things.

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    A surprising number of the names on the cards in my box are repeated. I’m not talking about duplicates: I’ve been introduced to quite a few people who have handed me a card for their day job, and then added a personal card to the stack. It seems that carrying multiple business cards is becoming common.

    How Many Business Cards Do You Need?

    If your employer goes to the effort of printing you business cards, the expectation seems to be that you’ll hand out those cards at each and every event you attend. But your job may not be the only thing you have going these days. The number of people pursuing something on the side is constantly growing. Heck, even full-time freelancers seem to wind up with multiple approaches and multiple cards — a blogger who also does SEO optimization may have a card for each aspect of his business.

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    But what does that mean for the rest of us? Just because the cool kids have multiple business cards doesn’t mean that all of us have to try to remember which card to hand out at which events, right? I think the answer really comes down to ‘it depends.’ And it depends mores on you than on your employer. Whether or not you have an employer who prints your cards for you, it’s still important to have at least one card. But that doesn’t mean you need to hand everyone you meet both your personal and your employer’s cards.

    Business Cards Versus Personal Cards

    The real decision maker on the type of card you need comes down to what your own plans for your career include. Is it a priority for you to (eventually) make money on your side projects or move into a career more closely related to those projects? Do you see yourself moving on from your current employer — by their choice or yours — any time soon? If you’re answering yes, it does make sense for you to have some kind of personal card listing contact information beyond your employer’s. Think of it this way: if you’re working for a company that doesn’t seem steady, you want to be building connections that will help you move on down the road. You definitely don’t want your best contacts trying to reach you at a work email address long after you’ve left a particular company.

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    That doesn’t mean that a business card with your name and your employer’s logo isn’t useful. If you’re acting in a capacity as a representative of your company, it’s probably best to limit yourself to handing out your official business cards. After all, no one wants word to get back to the boss that they’ve been looking for prospects on company time. Furthermore, odds are pretty good that you do different things in your off-time than you might for an employer. Your employer may be the contact information that a potential client is actually interested in. Networking isn’t so much a game of how many names can you get in your address book as how many people can you help get things done (and who might be able to help you out as well).

    A Basic Card

    Maybe you’re thinking that it’s time to create a personal card of your own. You may not have any side projects, but you even if you just want an easy way of sharing your personal contact information, a card can make the fit. Furthermore, you can do it very inexpensively. Online printers, like OvernightPrints or VistaPrints will run cards at prices as low as $10 for 100 cards. Put together a basic card with your name, phone number and email address and you’re ready to rock and roll. A simple card without a fancy design can actually be just as eye-catching as other options.

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    Sure, there are all sorts of social media cures for the card that are prefect for sharing your personal contact information at the touch of a button — Contxts comes to mind as an example — but the average member of the business is unlikely to join up with those services just to get one person’s contact information. If you’re thinking about relying on one of these tools to share your personal contact information, plan on needing to scribble it down on a napkin on a regular basis.

    That brings me to a last point. While it can be acceptable to write down a home phone number on a business card when you’re trying to make sure that a prospective client can get ahold of you if need be, it strikes me as unprofessional to flip over a card and proceed to write down a list of home contact information down to your Twitter ID and LinkedIn address. If you find yourself doing so on a regular basis, it’s a good warning sign that it’s time to get a personal business card.

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    Published on May 4, 2021

    How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

    How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

    They say we are the average of the five persons we spend the most time with. For a minute, consider the people around you. Are they truly who your “tribe” should be or who you aspire to become in the future? Are they really genuine people who want to see you succeed? Or are they fake people who don’t really want to see you happy?

    In this article, I’ll review why it is important to surround yourself with genuine individuals—the ones who care, bring something to our table, and first and foremost, who leave all fakeness behind.

    How to Spot Fake People?

    When you’ve been working in the helping professions for a while, spotting fake people gets a bit easier. There are some very clear signs that the person you are looking at is hiding something, acting somehow, or simply wanting to get somewhere. Most often, there is a secondary gain—perhaps attention, sympathy, or even a promotion.

    Whatever it is, you’re better off working their true agenda and staying the hell away. Here are some things you should look out for to help spot fake people.

    1. Full of Themselves

    Fake people like to show off. They love looking at themselves in the mirror. They collect photos and videos of every single achievement they had and every part of their body and claim to be the “best at what they do.”

    Most of these people are actually not that good in real life. But they act like they are and ensure that they appear better than the next person. The issue for you is that you may find yourself always feeling “beneath” them and irritated at their constant need to be in the spotlight.

    2. Murky in Expressing Their Emotions

    Have you ever tried having a deep and meaningful conversation with a fake person? It’s almost impossible. It’s because they have limited emotional intelligence and don’t know how they truly feel deep down—and partly because they don’t want to have their true emotions exposed, no matter how normal these might be.

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    It’s much harder to say “I’m the best at what I do” while simultaneously sharing “average” emotions with “equal” people.

    3. Zero Self-Reflection

    To grow, we must accept feedback from others. We must be open to our strengths and to our weaknesses. We must accept that we all come in different shapes and can always improve.

    Self-reflection requires us to think, forgive, admit fault, and learn from our mistakes. But to do that, we have to be able to adopt a level of genuineness and depth that fake people don’t routinely have. A fake person generally never apologizes, but when they do, it is often followed with a “but” in the next breath.

    4. Unrealistic Perceptions

    Fake people most often have an unrealistic perception of the world—things that they want to portray to others (pseudo achievements, materialistic gains, or a made-up sense of happiness) or simply how they genuinely regard life outside themselves.

    A lot of fake people hide pain, shame, and other underlying reasons in their behavior. This could explain why they can’t be authentic and/or have difficulties seeing their environment for the way it objectively is (both good and bad).

    5. Love Attention

    As I mentioned earlier, the biggest sign that something isn’t quite right with someone’s behavior can be established by how much they love attention. Are you being interrupted every time you speak by someone who wants to make sure that the spotlight gets reverted back to them? Is the focus always on them, no matter the topic? If yes, you’re probably dealing with a fake person.

    6. People Pleaser

    Appreciation feels nice but having everyone like you is even better. While it is completely unrealistic for most people to please everyone all the time, fake people seem to always say yes in pursuit of constant approval.

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    Now, this is a problem for two reasons. Firstly, these people are simply saying yes to things for their own satisfaction. Secondly, they often end up changing their minds or retracting their offer for one reason or another (“I would have loved to, but my grandmother suddenly fell ill.”), leaving you in the lurch for the 100th time this year.

    7. Sarcasm and Cynicism

    Behind the chronic pasted smile, fake people are well known for brewing resentment, jealousy, or anger. This is because, behind the postcard life, they are often unhappy. Sarcasm and cynicism are well known to act as a defense mechanism, sometimes even a diversion—anything so they can remain feeling on top of the world, whether it is through boosting themselves or bringing people down.

    8. Crappy friend

    Fake people are bad friends. They don’t listen to you, your feelings, and whatever news you might have to share. In fact, you might find yourself migrating away from them when you have exciting or bad news to share, knowing that it will always end up one way—their way. In addition, you might find that they’re not available when you truly need them or worse, cancel plans at the last minute.

    It’s not unusual to hear that a fake person talks constantly behind people’s backs. Let’s be honest, if they do it to others, they’re doing it to you too. If your “friend” makes you feel bad constantly, trust me, they’re not achieving their purpose, and they’re simply not a good person to have around.

    The sooner you learn to spot these fake people, the sooner you can meet meaningful individuals again.

    How to Cope With Fake People Moving Forward?

    It is important to remind yourself that you deserve more than what you’re getting. You are worthy, valuable, precious, and just as important as the next person.

    There are many ways to manage fake people. Here are some tips on how to deal with them.

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    1. Boundaries

    Keep your boundaries very clear. As explained in the book Unlock Your Resilience, boundaries are what keep you sane when the world tries to suffocate you. When fake people become emotional vampires, make sure to keep your distances, limit contact, and simply replace them with more valuable interactions.

    2. Don’t Take Their Behavior Personally

    Sadly, they most likely have behaved this way before they knew you and will continue much longer after you have moved on. It isn’t about you. It is about their inner need to meet a void that you are not responsible for. And in all honesty, unless you are a trained professional, you are unlikely to improve it anyway.

    3. Be Upfront and Honest About How You Feel

    If your “friend” has been hurtful or engaged in behaviors you struggle with, let them know—nicely, firmly, however you want, but let them know that they are affecting you. If it works, great. If it doesn’t, you’ll feel better and when you’re ready to move on, you’ll know you tried to reach out. Your conscience is clear.

    4. Ask for Advice

    If you’re unsure about what you’re seeing or feeling, ask for advice. Perhaps a relative, a good friend, or a colleague might have some input as to whether you are overreacting or seeing some genuine concerns.

    Now, don’t confuse asking for advice with gossiping behind the fake person’s back because, in the end, you don’t want to stoop down to their level. However, a little reminder as to how to stay on your own wellness track can never hurt.

    5. Dig Deeper

    Now, this one, I offer with caution. If you are emotionally strong, up to it, guaranteed you won’t get sucked into it, and have the skills to manage, perhaps you could dig into the reasons a fake person is acting the way they do.

    Have they suffered recent trauma? Have they been rejected all their lives? Is their self-esteem so low that they must resort to making themselves feel good in any way they can? Sometimes, having an understanding of a person’s behavior can help in processing it.

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    6. Practice Self-Care!

    Clearly, putting some distance between the fake person and yourself is probably the way to go. However, sometimes, it takes time to get there. In the meantime, make sure to practice self-care, be gentle with yourself, and compensate with lots of positives!

    Self-care can be as simple as taking a hot shower after talking to them or declining an invitation when you’re not feeling up to the challenge.

    Spotting fake people isn’t too hard. They generally glow with wanna-be vibes. However, most often, there are reasons as to why they are like this. Calling their behavior might be the first step. Providing them with support might be the second. But if these don’t work, it’s time to stay away and surround yourself with the positivity that you deserve.

    Final Thoughts

    Remember that life is a rollercoaster. It has good moments, tough moments, and moments you wouldn’t change for the world. So, look around and make sure that you take the time to choose the right people to share it all with.

    We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with, so take a good look around and choose wisely!

    More Tips on Dealing With Fake People

    Featured photo credit: Priscilla Du Preez via unsplash.com

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