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Building Relationships: 10 Ways to Get the Most Out of Social Networking Sites

Building Relationships: 10 Ways to Get the Most Out of Social Networking Sites
Get the Most Out of Social Networking Sites

The Internet has changed the way we relate to each other, as business partners, as clients, as friends, as family, even as lovers. Not only has it become easier to stay in touch with people we already know, it has become easier to find and connect with people we’ve never met before — and might not ever meet at all!

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Whether you’re looking for new customers, a new audience, a new business partner, a new vendor, new friends, or a new one night stand, you can maximize your use of the Internet and the wave of social networking sites that have cropped up to help us connect. Doing even a few of these things will set you apart from the vast majority of people who view social network sites as toys and networking as “just for fun” (though it can be fun, too).

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  1. Have a clear purpose: Know what you’re using a social networking site for. While it’s ok to have a profile somewhere that’s just for “hanging out”, you need to know that hanging out is its purpose. If you are using a social networking site to try to build an audience, connect with other professionals, or meet your next wife, it should be focused on achieving that end. Don’t muddy the waters by trying to advertise your dog-walking service, pick up dates for the weekend, post pictures of the company picnic, and build an audience for your homebrew science fiction video series.
  2. Complete your profile: You’d be surprised how many people never do this. Yet it’s the first thing people want to know about you. Most people check all the boxes (I’m a Virgo, in a relationship… done!) but don’t do much with the real “meat” of their profile, the About Me section. Put some thought into what you want people to know about you and why people should care.
  3. Don’t follow the leader: It can be tempting to sit back and wait for people to contact you, for people to leave comments, for people to suggest installing some new application — rousing yourself only to respond to whatever prompts come your way. Take the initiative and add people, select a handful of apps you like and stick with them, and update on a semi-regular basis (or a regular basis; schedule 30 minutes a week to update your profile, if it’s an important part of your public image).
  4. Accept everyone: There are two schools of thought on this: create an inner circle of close colleagues, comrades, or companions; or create a huge body of followers, fans, or ex-girl- and boyfriends. I fall into the second camp — anyone who has taken the effort to “friend” me gets added. Those are the people who are willing to invest their attention in what you’re doing, who have given you permission to “broadcast” your life to them. Welcome them.
  5. Add everyone you know, no matter how little: Most services these days will scan your address book and tell you if there’s anyone you might already know onboard. Some will also recommend people a on people you already know, places you’ve worked, or interests you’ve highlighted. (LinkedIn is scarily good at this!) If you come across someone you actually know in “real life”, no matter how distantly, add them. That is, after all, the point of social networking — to leverage the often-invisible connections that exist between us and other people. The worst that can happen is that they say “no” — this has never happened to me.
  6. Pick one or two networks and work them: It can be tempting to sign up for dozens of social networking sites, especially when different contacts turn up on different sites. But it’s nearly impossible to make use of a dozen different sites, unless you figure out how to make a career of it. Instead, pick one or two sites and focus all your energies on creating useful, meaningful connections there.
  7. Send messages: Find a reason to connect with the people in your network, and send them a message once in a while. Since the main point of this is to keep a channel of communication open, it doesn’t have to be profound — a “happy birthday” is good, if the site reveals birthdays. Don’t, though, make it all about you — that is, don’t post a message to everyone in your list every time you update a picture, go to work, or leave your house. (You laugh — I’ve had friends that did this!)
  8. Have something to say: Let people know why you’re there, what your purpose is, and what makes you, you. Give people a reason to pay attention to you. Although most people in your circle will stay in your circle indefinitely if you don’t do anything at all, having connections because they’ve forgotten you’re there is hardly the best use of a social network! Post something to your front page, blog, wall, or whatever it is every now and then, so that people learn something about you.
  9. Avoid clutter: Remember when MySpace pages were awful and Facebook pages were clean and simple. No more — now it takes about 8 minutes for your profile anywhere to get covered with junk. If your page is so full of junk that nobody can tell anything important about you, you might as well not have a page. Limit yourself to only 3 or 4 extras, and either stick with the default theme or try to find one that’s clean and simple.
  10. Firewall your personal with business lives: This might not apply to everyone, but for most people, once you’ve decided to use a social networking site for business purposes, don’t use it at all for non-business communication — and vice versa. Remember that the story about you, the goat, and the magnum of champagne is going out to everyone you’ve allowed to see your profile. That’s not something you want to share with potential business partners. If necessary, create two profiles on the same site, one for your business persona, the other for your personal life; instead of denying friend requests from friends and family, you can just refer them to the other profile.

Social networking sites have a reputation as being huge time wasters, and for most people, they are. If you can afford that luxury, more power to you; for the rest of you, really think about what social networking can do for you and focus your energies to making that work.

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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