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Are You Too Scared to Write? Stop Thinking and Just Do It

Are You Too Scared to Write? Stop Thinking and Just Do It

    It has taken me over 15 years to get back to writing and start taking it seriously.

    I have been reading and writing since I was barely out of diapers. And yet I never dared to think of myself as a writer. “God, no I can’t be one of those,” I thought. I allowed my fears of writing to rule my life, to make me not even admit to myself that I was doing the same job that writers do.

    My fears took the form of excuses, but they still were fears in disguise. Fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of being accused of
    impersonating someone I was not. Do you relate to any of these?

    Fear #1 – You are not good enough

    All of my life, I thought I was a mediocre writer – that my work was not worthy of being made public.

    For one, I wrote in a very ‘bloggish’ style. A conversational style that has been made popular by the likes of Golden’s Memoirs of a Geisha , Gilbert’s Eat, Pray, Love and David Nicholl’s One Day. Twenty years ago, I couldn’t find any books that would say to me “your style is valid too”; colloquial is good.

    Writing in a personal, conversational style where it feels like you are having an intimate conversation with your reader is not only perfectly valid but highly sought after. The stronger your voice is and the more opinionated you are, the more interesting writer you will become.

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    I wish somebody had told me 10 years ago. I wish somebody had told me to stop comparing my writing with others.

    What has been keeping you from calling yourself a writer?

    Is it a different sort of style, love of genre or form? Whatever it is, embrace it and work it.

    Writing is about voice, personality and delivery, not the placement of your em-dash. (Which I love to use by the way). People are looking for honesty, not perfect prose, which means you have all the creativity you need.

    Banish perfection and hone your craft. Remember imperfect is interesting. Doubt is good – it helps you steer in revision.

    Sit down, start writing and don’t think. That’s all you need to do to write. Don’t think – just write.

    Fear #2 – You have nothing to say

    Feed your brain. Read, observe, participate, live.

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    Record your ideas: a small writing pad and a small writing device are your best friend. You can lug them around and there is no excuse to be two feet away from one at any time. My best ideas come when I am doing the dishes or about to fall asleep. Both are not ideal. If I couldn’t touch some sort of notebook when I reached for it, I’d lose all sleep.

    Get rid of distraction: turn off the Internet, your phone, and TV. Disappear for a while in your writing. And you will amazed and how much work you can accomplish.

    You need what you need to know. You don’t need 50 personal and writing books to tell you that. They make you feel like you are not creative enough, organized enough, fit enough, clever enough. You are all those things. Have you lived a life? If so, that qualifies you to write.

    There is only one thing you need to write – you need to have a life. Write about what you have lived through – tell your own stories.

    Fear #3 – You don’t know where to begin

    It’s very simple. All you need are a few things:

    • A quiet place to sit.
    • A paper and pencil or computer.
    • Ability to be by yourself for a while.
    • Willingness to explore yourself.

    What you DON’T need:

    • An expensive education or writing degree.
    • Expensive stationary and office supplies etc.
    • Expensive computers and software.
    • Anything new.

    Fear #4 – You don’t have support

    Writing is a communal act – you don’t do it alone.

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    Don’t fret if your family gives you blank stares when you suddenly announce, “I want to write.” Don’t lose hope when your partner doesn’t break into a dance of joy upon hearing this good news.

    Don’t be offended if your friends nod their heads politely, while keeping an eye on their kids chasing each other at the park, or trying to kill someone. It’s very unlikely that you will find support among your family and friends – unless you are incredibly lucky. Give them time, let the news sink in, for both your sakes. Remember they are new at this too; they will eventually come around.

    Go on on an active hunt for like minded people.

    Have you been following any writers’ blogs? Read the ones that offer courage and inspiration to keep you going as you hone your craft. They will keep you motivated. Even better, start a blog of your own if you haven’t already.

    Go to the local library and find reading or writing groups. Join an online book group where all the “book obsessed” hang out. Attend live readings. If you are too shy to do these things, join anyway and lurk. Speak up when you have the courage. Don’t talk about your work for now – just listen.

    All in all, remember these 3 rules:

    1. Stop thinking.

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    2. Start writing.

    3. Don’t think about it.

    Be interesting and you will make your writing interesting. Write honestly and passionately and learn along the way. That’s how all the famous ones do it!

    Which fear of writing is stopping you from writing? Do share in the comments below.

    (Photo credit: An open old book by the candlelight via Shutterstock)

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    Marya Jan

    Facebook Ad Strategist

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    Last Updated on March 14, 2019

    7 Questions to Ask in a Job Interview That Will Impress the Interviewer

    7 Questions to Ask in a Job Interview That Will Impress the Interviewer

    Recruiters might hold thousands of interviews in their careers and a lot of them are reporting the same thing—that most candidates play it safe with the questions they ask, or have no questions to ask in a job interview at all.

    For job applicants, this approach is crazy! This is a job that you’re going to dedicate a lot of hours to and that might have a huge impact on your future career. Don’t throw away the chance to figure out if the position is perfect for you.

    Here are 7 killer questions to ask in a job interview that will both impress your counterpart and give you some really useful insights into whether this job will be a dream … or a nightmare.

    1. What are some challenges I might come up against this role?

    A lesser candidate might ask, “what does a typical day look like in this role?” While this is a perfectly reasonable question to ask in an interview, focusing on potential challenges takes you much further because it indicates that you already are visualizing yourself in the role.

    It’s impressive because it shows that you are not afraid of challenges, and you are prepared to strategize a game plan upfront to make sure you succeed if you get the job.

    It can also open up a conversation about how you’ve solved problems in the past which can be a reassuring exercise for both you and the hiring manager.

    How it helps you:

    If you ask the interviewer to describe a typical day, you may get a vibrant picture of all the lovely things you’ll get to do in this job and all the lovely people you’ll get to do them with.

    Asking about potential roadblocks means you hear the other side of the story—dysfunctional teams, internal politics, difficult clients, bootstrap budgets and so on. This can help you decide if you’re up for the challenge or whether, for the sake of your sanity, you should respectfully decline the job offer.

    2. What are the qualities of really successful people in this role?

    Employers don’t want to hire someone who goes through the motions; they want to hire someone who will excel.

    Asking this question shows that you care about success, too. How could they not hire you with a dragon-slayer attitude like that?

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    How it helps you:

    Interviewers hire people who are great people to work with, but the definition of “great people” differs from person to person.

    Does this company hire and promote people with a specific attitude, approach, worth ethic or communication style? Are the most successful people in this role strong extroverts who love to talk and socialize when you are studious and reserved? Does the company reward those who work insane hours when you’re happiest in a more relaxed environment?

    If so, then this may not be the right match for you.

    Whatever the answer is, you can decide whether you have what it takes for the manager to be happy with your performance in this role. And if the interviewer has no idea what success looks like for this position, this is a sign to proceed with extreme caution.

    3. From the research I did on your company, I noticed the culture really supports XYZ. Can you tell me more about that element of the culture and how it impacts this job role?

    Of course, you could just ask “what is the culture like here? ” but then you would miss a great opportunity to show that you’ve done your research!

    Interviewers give BIG bonus point to those who read up and pay attention, and you’ve just pointed out that (a) you’re diligent in your research (b) you care about the company culture and (c) you’re committed to finding a great cultural fit.

    How it helps you:

    This question is so useful because it lets you pick an element of the culture that you really care about and that will have the most impact on whether you are happy with the organization.

    For example, if training and development is important to you, then you need to know what’s on offer so you don’t end up in a dead-end job with no learning opportunities.

    Companies often talk a good talk, and their press releases may be full of shiny CSR initiatives and all the headline-grabbing diversity programs they’re putting in place. This is your opportunity to look under the hood and see if the company lives its values on the ground.

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    A company that says it is committed to doing the right thing by customers should not judge success by the number of up-sells an employee makes, for instance. Look for consistency, so you aren’t in for a culture shock after you start.

    4. What is the promotion path for this role, and how would my performance on that path be measured?

    To be clear, you are not asking when you will get promoted. Don’t go there—it’s presumptuous, and it indicates that you think you are better than the role you have applied for.

    A career-minded candidate, on the other hand, usually has a plan that she’s working towards. This question shows you have a great drive toward growth and advancement and an intention to stick with the company beyond your current state.

    How it helps you:

    One word: hierarchy.

    All organizations have levels of work and authority—executives, upper managers, line managers, the workforce, and so on. Understanding the hierarchical structure gives you power, because you can decide if you can work within it and are capable of climbing through its ranks, or whether it will be endlessly frustrating to you.

    In a traditional pyramid hierarchy, for example, the people at the bottom tend to have very little autonomy to make decisions. This gets better as you rise up through the pyramid, but even middle managers have little power to create policy; they are more concerned with enforcing the rules the top leaders make.

    If having a high degree of autonomy and accountability is important to you, you may do better in a flat hierarchy where work teams can design their own way of achieving the corporate goals.

    5. What’s the most important thing the successful candidate could accomplish in their first 3 months/6 months/year?

    Of all the questions to ask in a job interview, this one is impressive because it shows that you identify with and want to be a successful performer, and not just an average one.

    Here, you’re drilling down into what the company needs, and needs quite urgently, proving that you’re all about adding value to the organization and not just about what’s in it for you.

    How it helps you:

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    Most job descriptions come with 8, 10 or 12 different job responsibilities and a lot of them with be boilerplate or responsibilities that someone in HR thinks are associated with this role. This question gives you a better sense of which responsibilities are the most important—and they may not be what initially attracted you to the role.

    If you like the idea of training juniors, for example, but success is judged purely on your sales figures, then is this really the job you thought you were applying for?

    This question will also give you an idea of what kind of learning curve you’re expected to have and whether you’ll get any ramp-up time before getting down to business. If you’re the type of person who likes to jump right in and get things done, for instance, you may not be thrilled to hear that you’re going to spend the first three months shadowing a peer.

    6. What do you like about working here?

    This simple question is all about building rapport with the interviewer. People like to talk about themselves, and the interviewer will be flattered that you’re interested in her opinions.

    Hopefully, you’ll find some great connection points that the two of you share. What similar things drive you head into the office each day? How will you fit into the culture?

    How it helps you:

    You can learn a lot from this question. Someone who genuinely enjoys his job will be able to list several things they like, and their answers will sound passionate and sincere. If not….well, you might consider that a red flag.

    Since you potentially can learn a lot about the company culture from this question, it’s a good idea to figure out upfront what’s important to you. Maybe you’re looking for a hands-off boss who values independent thought and creativity? Maybe you work better in environments that move at a rapid, exciting pace?

    Whatever’s important to you, listen carefully and see if you can find any common ground.

    7. Based on this interview, do you have any questions or concerns about my qualifications for the role?

    What a great closing question to ask in a job interview! It shows that you’re not afraid of feedback—in fact, you are inviting it. Not being able to take criticism is a red flag for employers, who need to know that you’ll act on any “coaching moments” with a good heart.

    As a bonus, asking this question shows that you are really interested in the position and wish to clear up anything that may be holding the company back from hiring you.

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    How it helps you:

    What a devious beast this question is! On the surface, it looks straightforward, but it’s actually giving you four key pieces of information.

    First, is the manager capable of giving you feedback when put on the spot like this? Some managers are scared of giving feedback, or don’t think it’s important enough to bother outside of a formal performance appraisal. Do you want to work for a boss like that? How will you improve if no one is telling you what you did wrong?

    Second, can the manager give feedback in a constructive way without being too pillowy or too confrontational? It’s unfair to expect the interviewer to have figured out your preferred way of receiving feedback in the space of an interview, but if she come back with a machine-gun fire of shortcomings or one of those corporate feedback “sandwiches” (the doozy slipped between two slices of compliment), then you need to ask yourself, can you work with someone who gives feedback like that?

    Third, you get to learn the things the hiring manager is concerned about before you leave the interview. This gives you the chance to make a final, tailored sales pitch so you can convince the interviewer that she should not be worried about those things.

    Fourth, you get to learn the things the hiring manager is concerned about period. If turnover is keeping him up at night, then your frequent job hopping might get a lot of additional scrutiny. If he’s facing some issues with conflict or communication, then he might raise concerns regarding your performance in this area.

    Listen carefully: the concerns that are being raised about you might actually be a proxy for problems in the wider organization.

    Making Your Interview Work for You

    Interviews are a two-way street. While it is important to differentiate yourself from every other candidate, understand that convincing the interviewer you’re the right person for the role goes hand-in-hand with figuring out if the job is the right fit for you.

    Would you feel happy in a work environment where the people, priorities, culture and management style were completely at odds with the way you work? Didn’t think so!

    More Resources About Job Interviews

    Featured photo credit: Amy Hirschi via unsplash.com

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