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After I Read This, I Totally Know When I Should Stay Silent Or Speak

After I Read This, I Totally Know When I Should Stay Silent Or Speak

Have you ever regretted something that you said?

Or has there ever been a time when you knew you should have spoken up, but you didn’t?

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Well, here are some valuable tips to know when to stay silent and when to speak up.

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When silence is golden:

  • Staying silent can be just as powerful as the words you mean to say, like when the act of hugging will be more comforting than saying, “Sorry for your loss.”
  • Another time when silence is golden is when you are unsure of what to say. If you are confused about your own feelings concerning a matter, it’s best to stay quiet until you are more certain because more harm can be done by revealing false or exaggerated feelings.
  • Choose silence instead of blurting out ‘in-the-moment’ feelings that are hurtful and not really how you feel in the grand scheme of things. When you feel the urge to say an unkind thing, take a few breaths and think of the possible consequences of your words.
  • Another time when it’s best to stay silent is when someone is sharing a meaningful story. Let the friend or person feel ‘heard’ by your silent nodding and sincere eye contact.
  • Silence can be your best friend during negotiations. Say your piece, then close your mouth, and let the other person come to their own conclusions. Your silence shows that one, you are confident in what you just said, and two, you respect the other person enough to hear what they have to say.
  • Sometimes silence is the best and most timely solution because the other person is not in a position to hear what you have to say. For example, when a friend needs for you to listen to her problems, but she is unable to accept your advice at that moment.
  • Practice being silent at work when you don’t have anything meaningful to contribute. Unless you can elevate the conversation by pointing out something interesting, missing, or beneficial, it’s best to just observe and learn.
  • Finally, silence is golden when you don’t want to engage in a fool’s argument. As some squabbles will never be resolved, one must agree to disagree.

When to speak up loud and clear:

There will be times in your life where you will need the power of your voice. The voice within you that wants and needs to be respected and appreciated.

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  • Use your voice and speak up when your feelings are being trampled on. Many things are out of our control, but it is within our power to control the words and feelings that we convey to others.

Articulate your feelings clearly and let people know that you value your well-being.

  • Speak up for others who have no voice or are unable to speak for themselves for one reason or another. Your voice may be the only thing that saves and protects them from harm.
  • Speak up when you see a wrong being done as silence could be seen as complicit agreement.

One can view speaking up as the truest act of humanity, since as far as we know, we are the only animals who can do it.

  • Speak up when you are asked for your opinion as the person doing the asking must value it.
  • Finally, speak up when you want to be heard. Whether in the work place or in a relationship, if you believe what you have to say is valuable, don’t be afraid to open your mouth.

The ability to speak up takes a level of confidence, but just like all skills, someone only needs to practice in order to get better.

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Last Updated on December 2, 2018

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

When giving a presentation or speech, you have to engage your audience effectively in order to truly get your point across. Unlike a written editorial or newsletter, your speech is fleeting; once you’ve said everything you set out to say, you don’t get a second chance to have your voice heard in that specific arena.

You need to make sure your audience hangs on to every word you say, from your introduction to your wrap-up. You can do so by:

1. Connecting them with each other

Picture your typical rock concert. What’s the first thing the singer says to the crowd after jumping out on stage? “Hello (insert city name here)!” Just acknowledging that he’s coherent enough to know where he is is enough for the audience to go wild and get into the show.

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It makes each individual feel as if they’re a part of something bigger. The same goes for any public speaking event. When an audience hears, “You’re all here because you care deeply about wildlife preservation,” it gives them a sense that they’re not just there to listen, but they’re there to connect with the like-minded people all around them.

2. Connect with their emotions

Speakers always try to get their audience emotionally involved in whatever topic they’re discussing. There are a variety of ways in which to do this, such as using statistics, stories, pictures or videos that really show the importance of the topic at hand.

For example, showing pictures of the aftermath of an accident related to drunk driving will certainly send a specific message to an audience of teenagers and young adults. While doing so might be emotionally nerve-racking to the crowd, it may be necessary to get your point across and engage them fully.

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3. Keep going back to the beginning

Revisit your theme throughout your presentation. Although you should give your audience the credit they deserve and know that they can follow along, linking back to your initial thesis can act as a subconscious reminder of why what you’re currently telling them is important.

On the other hand, if you simply mention your theme or the point of your speech at the beginning and never mention it again, it gives your audience the impression that it’s not really that important.

4. Link to your audience’s motivation

After you’ve acknowledged your audience’s common interests in being present, discuss their motivation for being there. Be specific. Using the previous example, if your audience clearly cares about wildlife preservation, discuss what can be done to help save endangered species’ from extinction.

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Don’t just give them cold, hard facts; use the facts to make a point that they can use to better themselves or the world in some way.

5. Entertain them

While not all speeches or presentations are meant to be entertaining in a comedic way, audiences will become thoroughly engaged in anecdotes that relate to the overall theme of the speech. We discussed appealing to emotions, and that’s exactly what a speaker sets out to do when he tells a story from his past or that of a well-known historical figure.

Speakers usually tell more than one story in order to show that the first one they told isn’t simply an anomaly, and that whatever outcome they’re attempting to prove will consistently reoccur, given certain circumstances.

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6. Appeal to loyalty

Just like the musician mentioning the town he’s playing in will get the audience ready to rock, speakers need to appeal to their audience’s loyalty to their country, company, product or cause. Show them how important it is that they’re present and listening to your speech by making your words hit home to each individual.

In doing so, the members of your audience will feel as if you’re speaking directly to them while you’re addressing the entire crowd.

7. Tell them the benefits of the presentation

Early on in your presentation, you should tell your audience exactly what they’ll learn, and exactly how they’ll learn it. Don’t expect them to listen if they don’t have clear-cut information to listen for. On the other hand, if they know what to listen for, they’ll be more apt to stay engaged throughout your entire presentation so they don’t miss anything.

Featured photo credit: Flickr via farm4.staticflickr.com

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