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7 Great Ways to Be Social During the Holidays

7 Great Ways to Be Social During the Holidays
    Photo credit: confidence, comely. (CC BY-NC 2.0)

    The holidays are an excellent opportunity to socialize, make friends, have fun with others and be grateful for the people in your life.

    But if you’re somewhat on the shy side and you have trouble opening up during social interactions, holidays can be a pain in the neck, because you know others socialize and enjoy themselves while you’re missing out on all the fun.

    Well, this year is going to be different.

    As a social confidence coach, helping others overcome their shyness and be more outgoing is the core of my job description. I want to share with you 7 great ways to be more social during the upcoming holiday season.

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    1. Fill up Your Social Agenda

    Forget about spending Christmas Eve watching a movie alone or the holiday vacation reading a 1200-page book. The first key step to enjoying meaningful interactions during the holidays is to get involved in social activities instead of avoiding them. Any social activity you can find, try to attend. Family dinner, corporate party, friends gathering, drinking night, holiday trip — anything goes.

    Even if it may not sound appealing at first — or just the thought of attending it makes you feel nervous — you will typically discover it’s a lot more fun once you actually go to it.

    2. Organize Social Events

    There is no need to wait for others to organize some social activity and invite you, too. Take the initiative, arrange your own social events, and invite others to attend.

    Throw a pre-Christmas party or a post-New Year’s Eve party to finish all the leftovers. Organize a poker night or a simple get together with old friends. There are plenty of things you can do. And when you’re the host or the initiator of a certain social activity, since you’re on your ‘turf’, it’s easier to feel confident and be more social.

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    3. Bear Gifts

    All people love to receive gifts; it’s not just children that do at this time of year. Getting gifts makes them feel appreciated. This is why gifts are a good way to elicit people’s goodwill, and the holidays are the perfect occasion to bear gifts.

    So when you visit or meet someone, take a little time to buy them a nice little holiday present. It doesn’t have to be something expensive — just something interesting. Remember: it’s the gesture that matters the most.

    4. Take More Risks

    People who are shy or reserved are archetypal “risk avoiders” in social settings. They don’t want to say anything improper, be rude or embarrass themselves. Consequently, they avoid speaking their mind and being authentic in social interactions.

    If this is your case, this is a terrific moment to start taking more risks when interacting with others. Speak your mind, open up and be as spontaneous as you can. If others like you, fine. If they don’t, don’t worry — nobody has ever died because of it.

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    5. Seek the Friendly Persons

    If you have a hard time starting conversations with people at parties or other social events, the best advice I can offer you is to look for the people who seem the friendliest in the room and start by talking with them.

    The fact they are gregarious and positive heartens you to be the same. It boosts your self-assurance and, eventually, you will also feel confident enough to talk with other persons as well.

    6. Use the Holidays to Come Up with Conversation Topics

    During the holidays, one of the best topics to talk about is the holidays. People are generally in the moment, enjoying the festivities, and they like to share them with others.

    During conversation, ask people how they’ve spent the holidays so far, what their plans for the next few days are, what they’re doing for New Year’s Eve, what presents they got for Christmas and so on. There is an abundance of things to talk about regarding the holidays — so go for it.

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    7. Listen, but Also Talk

    A good conversation is a two-way street. It’s important to be a good listener and encourage the other person to talk and open up, but you also want to talk and open up yourself.

    For many people, this can be an issue. They tend to feel uncomfortable with disclosing themselves. There is only one method to overcome this, and that is to deliberately disclose yourself more, despite the aversion you have. As you get used to it, it gets a lot easier.

    In Closing

    As you open up and become more social, and start letting go of the need to have the approval of others, you’ll find yourself having a lot of fun during social interactions and fully enjoying the holidays.

    On that note, I wish you the best — and most social — holidays you’ve ever had.

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    Eduard Ezeanu

    Eduard is a confidence and communication coach with 7+ years of experience.

    5 Powerful Ways for Building Fulfilling Relationships 7 Things to Remember When Going Through Tough Times in Life The First 6 Steps You Can Take To Become Productive Instantly 7 Great Ways to Be Social During the Holidays 4 Proactive Strategies to Build a Social Life

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    Last Updated on July 10, 2020

    How to Reinvent Yourself and Change Your Life

    How to Reinvent Yourself and Change Your Life

    There will always be times in your life when you may need to learn how to reinvent yourself. This could come when you experience a big change, such as leaving your job, moving on from a relationship, transferring to a new home, or losing a loved one. If you are going through a major shift in your life, you may have to find new ways of thinking or doing things, or risk failing to reach your full potential.

    “When something bad happens, you have three choices. You can let it define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you.”

    Many people who dared to leave their old unhappy lives enabled themselves to pursue their passions and find a renewed zest for living. You can also achieve the same if you take a leap of faith and make things happen for yourself.

    To help you always be at your best wherever you may be in your life, here are some practical tips on how to reinvent yourself.

    The Reinvention Checklist

    Before embarking on a journey of self-reinvention, you need to make sure that you have everything that you need to make the trip bump-proof. These things include:

    Resilience

    Problems and obstacles are guaranteed to happen. Some of them will be difficult and may knock you off course; the important thing, however, is that you learn from these difficulties, never lose focus, and always get back up. This requires building resilience to get through the tough times.

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    Support

    Humans are social beings. Although it is important that you learn to rely on yourself when facing any challenge, it is also important to have a support team that you can lean on to give you a boost when things get too tough and to correct you when you’re making mistakes.

    The key is to find the right balance between independence and dependence. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable and share the difficulties you’re facing. When you open up, you’ll find the people who are really going to be there for you.

    Self-Care

    During the process of learning how to reinvent yourself, you will have to pull yourself away from your old comfort zones, habits, roles, and self-perceptions. This can be difficult and cause you to question your self-worth, so it’s important to engage in self-care to maintain a positive outlook and keep your mind and body healthy as you face the challenges that await you. Self-care can include:

    • Participating in a hobby you enjoy
    • Spending time with your support system
    • Taking some time to walk in nature
    • Practicing loving-kindness meditation

    Find what works for you and what helps you feel like your true self as you seek a reinvented version of you.

    How to Reinvent Yourself

    Once you’re sure that you’re equipped with all the tools in the self-reinvention checklist, you can begin your journey of learning how to reinvent yourself.

    1. Discover Your Strengths

    This step provides valuable information on how you deal with certain situations. If you have this information, you will be able to manage difficulties more efficiently.

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    To find out what your strengths are, you can ask your friends and colleagues for feedback, engage in self-reflection, or try these 10 Ways to Find Your Own Personal Strengths.

    2. Plan

    This step calls for a thorough assessment of your current emotional, psychological, and financial status so that you can develop plans that are realistic and practical.

    It’s okay to have ambitious dreams, but your plans have to be realistic. Making use of SMART goals can help you plan your life better.

    You can also consult your mentor or life coach for practical tips and advice.

    Ultimately, you’ll want to create specific long-term and short-term goals that you can create milestones for. By doing this, you’ll lay out a specific roadmap to your reinvented self.

    3. Try Things Out

    Sometimes, we don’t know if solutions actually work until we try them out. This is why it is important to experiment whenever possible, especially if you’re dealing with a career change. You may need to simply experiment in order to find the things you like. This can be the same with hobbies. If you’re not sure what you would like doing, accept invitations from friends to join them in their favorite sport or take a class, like pottery or photography.

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    By seeing what’s out there in any area of your life, you’ll have a better chance of finding the things you enjoy and the goals you want to create.

    4. Manage Your Finances Well

    Changes may require a bit of money. If you’re shifting to a new career, you may have to pay for training. If you’re going through a tough divorce or having a hard time dealing with the death of a loved one, you may have to pay for therapy. If you’re moving to a new home, you’ll definitely have to pay a whole lot of expenses.

    All of these things are possible, but it will require a bit of money savviness as you learn how to reinvent yourself. If you have that cushion, you’ll feel more comfortable straying from your current path to try new things.

    5. Muster Your Courage

    Fears and self-doubt may arise when you encounter difficulties and setbacks. Sometimes, they may also come when you’re taking risks. You have to manage these negative emotions well and not allow them to discourage you. Tap into your courage and try doing at least one new thing each week to develop it.

    Learn how to deal with your self-doubts to move forward in this article: How Self Doubt Keeps You Stuck (And How to Overcome It)

    6. Use Your Support Group

    As stated above, you need to build a strong support group before you even start the process of reinventing yourself. Your group will keep you from taking wrong turns and encourage you when you get too weighed down by problems. Don’t be afraid to call them, or even ask them out for coffee if you need to vent about the current difficulties you’re facing.

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    7. Remind Yourself Every Day of Your Commitment

    Write your goals on different-sized cards and scatter them at home and at work in places where you can easily see them. This way, you will constantly be reminded of where you want to be. Remember, writing down your goals helps them stick[1].

    8. Accept Failure, Learn, and Resume Your Journey

    Failing is normal, especially when we’re trying out something new. When you fail, simply recognize it, learn from it, and move on. Failure, in the end, is the best way to learn what does and doesn’t work, and you simply won’t be able to learn how to reinvent yourself if you don’t accept the inevitable failures that await you.

    Final Thoughts

    If you truly want to learn how to reinvent yourself and live the life you desire, take the advice above and start taking action. It will take time, patience, and plenty of effort to make the change you want happen, but it will be all worth it.

    More Tips on How to Reinvent Yourself

    Featured photo credit: Ashley Rich via unsplash.com

    Reference

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