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7 Deadly Mindsets that Hold You Back from Learning Effectively

7 Deadly Mindsets that Hold You Back from Learning Effectively
Learning

In this hyper-competitive global environment, there is no certainty. Only change is certainly there. An honors degree can no longer secure a high paying job for life. As a result, you are constantly going for courses, learning new stuff and upgrading your skills.

This is a fast-paced world after all. You are faced with revolutionary changes and there’s so much to learn. This article will show you some of the dangerous mindsets that hold you back from learning effectively.


1. I’m too old to learn
As you grow older, there is this tiny voice in your head saying, “You are getting old and your brain is getting ‘rusty’”.

It’s true that your brain cells are killed over the years. But look at Albert Einstein, scientists have proved that he had only tapped less than 1 % of his brain’s power. It’s not an excuse to say that you can’t learn because you are too old.

Exercising your brain is like exercising your muscles. When you train your muscles, it gets developed and becomes stronger. The more you do, the more satisfaction you’ll get from the results. This applies to learning too.

If you consistently train your brain to learn new things, you will learn things much faster.

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2. I know everything.
Perhaps you are successful; you have an honors degree or even a master degree. And you assumed that you have learnt everything you need to know.

You believed that you are right and everybody is wrong. You won’t listen to anyone except yourself. Eventually someone is going to be hot on your heels and surpass you sooner or later.

It’s only when you fail would you start to realize that you’ve got to learn again.

3. I’m not smart enough.
You lost your job and you are finding a new one. You have been in a specialized industry for several years. Now it’s time to re-learn from scratch.

You wanted to learn something new, but you are worried that you are not smart enough. And you keep putting it off.

Even before you fight a war, you have surrendered. By thinking negatively, you have lost half the war.
Although you may have started learning, but half way through, you feel that you are not smart enough and give up halfway.

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The truth is that to master a skill, there are many learning curves and obstacles to break through. Maybe you are just a few steps away from mastering the skill.
Think about it, won’t it be a waste to give up halfway?

4. There are many people who are smarter than me.
You are in a class full of young, talented and intelligent professionals. When you looked at the mirror, you felt you are inferior to them.

In terms of learning abilities, these people are more proficient and skillful than you are. You cannot help it but thinking negatively about yourself.

The truth is there is always somebody better than you are. And the only way you will have an edge is through endless and continuous learning. It is your battle, not a battle with others.

5. This is not for me.
I’m sure you have been very enthusiastic when you first picking up something new. You may hit dead ends occasionally but at the start, your enthusiasm has pulled it through.

After a while, you keep going nowhere. You are near the intermediate stage but you are somehow stuck and you can’t advance to the next stage. You saw your friends improving and you are on the plateau. All the fun, excitement and enthusiasm die off.

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Now, you are tired of learning and you want to give up. You said to yourself, “This is not for me”.
The truth is this will be a deadly habit that will hinder your success. Think about it, it’s just an excuse to escape from the fact that you are not confident about yourself and your learning abilities. If you give up learning because it’s not for you, then you will never master anything.

6. Not focus.
Some people have the tendency of learning many things at the same time. One moment they are reading a “how to invest” book, the other they are reading a “how to do ebay”.

If you find yourself distracted, maybe it’s time to focus.

Imagine you are multi tasking, doing many different things at one go – talking on the phone, watching television, doing your work on the laptop. Would you able to do it well?

I doubt so. My advice to you…

Stay focused.

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7. I can learn it another day.
You returned home from a tiring day of heavy workload, stressful working environment and even long hours of office hours.

You have already planned to read another chapter of your book. But you decided to put it off again. In fact, for the past week, you have procrastinated and delayed your lessons or classes.

After a month, you simply forget about it.

The fact is to learn effectively, you got to be disciplined. No matter how tired you are, you have to stick with your plans and deadlines.

Please share some of your learning obstacles and comments about learning effectively.

George Tee is the author of “Secrets Of Scoring ‘A’s” and founder of Learning Nest – Secretsofstudying.com . A few of his popular articles are 5 Hacks That Make Study Simple And Effective, How To Effectively Manage Your Time and How I Excel In My Exams And Emerge Among The Top 53 Students.

More by this author

George Tee

George is the founder of Secrets of Studying. He is devoted in sharing his secrets of learning and growing as an entrepreneur.

How to Practice Positive Meditation in 2 Simple Steps How To Stay At The Top Of Your Game Everyday Genius – You Can Be One Too! 7 Deadly Mindsets that Hold You Back from Learning Effectively

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Last Updated on January 16, 2020

12 Simple Ways to Boost Your Confidence Right Now

12 Simple Ways to Boost Your Confidence Right Now

The way you feel about yourself greatly influences how you live and interact with others. If you are confident about yourself, you tend to see yourself positively and actually enjoy spending time with and around people. You don’t feel self-conscious or awkward around others, and that allows you to live your fullest and happiest life.

However, if you’re drowning in a sea of self-doubt, hesitancy and shyness, you often withdraw and isolate yourself from others and avoid interacting and connecting with people. That anxiety you feel in the pit of your stomach when you are around people is holding you back greatly and it is not good for your emotional health and overall well-being. You need to do something about it if you are low in self-confidence or have friends or family members who are not confident.

“Confidence isn’t walking into a room thinking you’re better than everyone, it’s walking in not having to compare yourself to anyone” – Anonymous

Here are simple, practical tips to boost your confidence right now and make you feel and act your best.

1. Stop labeling yourself as awkward, timid or shy.

When you label yourself as awkward, timid or shy, you sub-consciously tell your mind to act accordingly and psychologically feel inclined to live up to those expectations. Instead of labeling and entertaining negative self-talk, visualize and affirm yourself as confident and strong. Close your eyes for a minute and visualize yourself in different situation as you would like to be.

Be your own cheerleader. Experts believe that positive affirmation and good mental practices like picturing yourself winning or achieving a goal can lead to greater feelings of self-assurance and prepare your brain for success.[1] As the saying goes, “seeing is believing.” Picture yourself as confident and soon enough you will begin to manifest behavior that gives evidence to this new ‘fact.’

2. Recognize that the world is not focused on you (unless, of course, you are Kanye West).

That means you don’t have to be excessively sensitive about who you are or what you are doing (or not doing). You are not on the center stage; there is no need for preoccupation with self and perfectionism. As rap music star Rocko sings, “You just do you and I will do me, aight?”

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Forget about trying to please everyone or being perfect. Trying to be perfect and being a people-pleaser puts too much pressure on you and creates unnecessary anxiety. Besides, people are too preoccupied with their own issues to pay much attention to your every move unless, of course, you are a mega famous, super celebrity like Beyonce or Kanye West.

3. Focus on other people as opposed to yourself.

If you are low on confidence, self-conscious, nervous and shy in social situations, focus your attention on other people and what they are saying or doing instead of focusing on your own awkwardness.

For example, think about what it is that is interesting about the person who’s the centre of the party or the guy or girl you are talking with. Prompt them to talk more about themselves and be genuinely curious and interested in what they say. You will instantly come across as confident and warmhearted.

People generally want to talk about themselves, be heard and understood. They will love it when you’re eager and willing to listen to them and really hear what they have to say.

This habit of focusing more on what you love in others as opposed to what you dislike in yourself will not only help you become more assertive and comfortable in virtually all social situations, but also instantly make you feel great about yourself.

4. Know (and accept) yourself for who you are.

Chinese military general, strategist and philosopher Sun Tzu, author of the internationally acclaimed book The Art of War, said, “Know yourself and you will win all battles.” Even in the battle with lack of confidence, you will need to know yourself to win.

Knowing yourself starts with understanding that people are not all the same, neither are all social situation suitable for everyone. You might not be confident in large gatherings, but you could be bold and confident in one-on-one and small group interactions. We all have our own unique gifts and unique ways of expressing ourselves. Embrace yours!

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Introverts, for example, have a quiet confidence that is, unfortunately, often confused for shyness. They are naturally low key and prefer to spend time alone. However, this natural disposition affords them certain unique gifts, such as an ability to listen better than most people and notice things that others don’t.

Your uniqueness is where your strength and advantage lies. You won’t be comfortable and confident in all situations all the time. Albert Einstein said,

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”

5. Crack a smile.

If there is one sure way to instantly boost your confidence, it’s cracking a smile. Christine Clapp, a public speaking expert at The George Washington University, says that flashing those pretty, pearly white teeth will immediately make you appear both confident and composed. But, the effect of smiling is not just external. Studies show that smiling can also help nix feelings of stress and pave the way for a happier and more relaxed you.[2]

Not a bad return for something seemingly so trite, wouldn’t you agree?

6. Break a sweat—with exercise.

Working out is another great way to make yourself feel amazing and confident. Science has shown that exercising increases your endorphins, helps reduce stress, tones your muscles and makes you feel happy and confident.[3]

And hey, all you have to do is take a walk a few times a week and you’ll see the benefits. What seems to matter—as far as your confidence goes—is whether you break a sweat, not how strenuous your session is, which is pretty cool. Start working out now.

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7. Groom yourself.

This might seem mundane, but it’s amazing how much of a difference a shower and shave can have on your confidence and self-image. And when you spritz on a scent, the boost on confidence and self-esteem is incredible. As it turns out, your favorite fragrance does more than make you smell oh-so-nice.

A study found that a fragrance can inspire confidence in men. Interestingly, the study also found that the more a man likes the fragrance, the more confident he might feel. Another study found that 90% of women feel more confident while wearing a scent than those who go fragrance-free.

8. Dress nicely.

Another one that might seem trite, but it works. If you dress nicely, you’ll instantly feel good about yourself and give your confidence a real boost. That is largely because you’ll feel attractive, presentable and sometimes even successful in nice clothes.

While dressing nicely means something different for everyone, it does not necessarily mean wearing $500 designer outfits. It means wearing clothes that are clean, that you are comfortable in and that are nice-looking and presentable, including casual clothes.

9. Do activities you enjoy.

Whether it is reading a book, playing a musical instrument, riding your bicycle or going fishing, do what you really enjoy and what makes you truly happy often. It will boost your self-esteem, soothe your ego and allow you to identify with your gifts and talents. That will in turn bolster your self-belief and grow your confidence exponentially.

You might not become popular for doing what you love, but you might not even want to be popular at all. Being popular doesn’t make you happy; doing what you love does.

10. Prepare for the possibility of rejection / setback.

Late World No. 1 professional tennis player Arthur Ashe said, “One important key to success is self-confidence. A key to self-confidence is preparation.” You need to prepare for the possibility of rejection and setback.

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Why?

Everybody suffers rejection and setback at one point or another. You are not exempted. The question on your mind, therefore, should not be if you will be rejected, but how you will handle rejection when it comes.

Prepare yourself adequately in every situation to minimize the risk and effect of rejection and so that your confidence is not broken. For example, learn public speaking and rehearse what you are going to say beforehand if you have landed a public speaking engagement. That way, you are sure of yourself and confident you have what it takes to hack it. If you are rejected, don’t take it personally.

Rejection and setbacks happen to the best of us. Take it as a learning experience. Learn from your mistakes and move on.

11. Face uncomfortable situations square in the face.

Don’t run away from uncomfortable situations. Running away from people or situations because you feel scared, shy or timid only confirms and reinforces your shyness. Instead, face the situation that makes you uneasy square in the face. For example, go ahead and talk to that person you are afraid to approach, or go straight to the front of your yoga class! What’s the worst that can happen?

Prepare and be ready for any eventuality. The more you face your fears, the more you realize you are stronger than you thought and the more confident you get. This simple, yet admittedly courageous, act makes you unstoppable. You get comfortable being uncomfortable and begin to feel like you can take on the world. And that is the hallmark of someone destined for great things.

12. Sit up straight and walk tall—you are awesome!

Yes, sit up straight and believe you are awesome. Don’t slump in your chair or slouch your shoulders. Experts say the right stance can not only keep your self-esteem and mood lifted, but also lead to more confidence in your own thoughts.[4]

The way to sit is to open up your chest and keep your head level so that you look and feel poised and assured. And when you get up, stand tall and walk like you’re on a mission. People who sit up straight and walk tall are more attractive and instantly feel more confident. Try it now: you’ll feel fierce and confident just by sitting up straight and walking tall.

Featured photo credit: Freshh Connection via unsplash.com

Reference

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