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5 Surprisingly Accurate Gender Stereotypes About Sex

5 Surprisingly Accurate Gender Stereotypes About Sex

With all the gender stereotypes out there about sex, some are bound to be true. Do women orgasm as much as men think? Can men and women ever be “just friends”? Here are the answers science has given us.

1. Men can rarely be “just friends”.

While it’s certainly more convenient to assume that men and women are able to have strictly platonic friendships, recent research suggests otherwise.

Researchers at the University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire ran an experiment, questioning 88 pairs of undergraduate opposite-sex friends about their friendships.

The results of the study were clear: men were typically much more attracted to their female friends than vice versa. Interestingly, nearly everyone participating in the study, both men and women, assumed their feelings were mutual – whether romantic or platonic.

Further, men were just as likely to want romantic dates with friends who were taken as they were with friends who weren’t. Women, on the other hand, were not interested in pursuing a man who was already taken.

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As the Scientific American article about this very study notes, “Results suggest that men, relative to women, have a particularly hard time being ‘just friends’… Two people can experience the exact same relationship in radically different ways. Men seem to see myriad opportunities for romance in their supposedly platonic opposite-sex friendships. The women in these friendships, however, seem to have a completely different orientation—one that is actually platonic.”

2. Women find “nice guys” less attractive.

According to an article in Newsweek, researchers from the University of Rochester, the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign and the Interdisciplinary Center (IDC) Herzliya in Israel investigated the idea that, upon meeting, men find nice women more attractive than women find nice men.

In this study, participants were paired with others of the opposite gender who they’d never met before.  The study measured the correlation between a personality trait termed “responsiveness” and attractiveness to the opposite sex.

The researchers defined responsiveness as naturally signaling an understanding, encouraging, and supportive personality. While responsiveness is important for long-term relationships to thrive, it is not a factor for attraction in first meetings, at least not from a woman’s point of view.

The study observed that men were more drawn to responsive women upon first meeting them than their less-responsive counterparts. The men said they associated responsiveness with femininity and attractiveness.

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On the other hand, women did not associate responsiveness in men with either femininity nor masculinity, but they did feel more attracted to the non-responsive men.

This could be for a variety of reasons: as lead researcher Gurit Birnbaum points out in a press release, “Women may perceive this person as inappropriately nice and manipulative (i.e., trying to obtain sexual favors) or eager to please, perhaps even as desperate, and therefore less sexually appealing. Alternatively, women may perceive a responsive man as vulnerable and less dominant.”

3. Women orgasm less than men think.

According to The Kinsey Institute, 85% of men report that their partner had an orgasm during their last sexual encounter, compared to 64% of women who report that they actually did. Whether this is from women misreporting, men misreporting, or genuine misunderstanding, there is a significant discrepancy.

Kinsey reports that women are much more likely to be orgasmic when alone than with a partner. However, among women currently in a partnered relationship, 62% say they are very satisfied with how often they orgasm. This seems to be because many women report that even more satisfying than the sensation of orgasm itself is the feeling of being connected to someone.

Studies at Brown University indicate that it does not necessarily take longer for women to reach orgasm than it does for men, at least not during masturbation. During masturbation, women typically reach orgasm in a little less than four minutes, compared to two and three minutes for men.

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However, women take significantly longer to reach orgasm during foreplay and intercourse. It typically takes women 10-20 minutes to reach orgasm, whereas men typically take 7-14 minutes overall, 2-3 minutes after beginning intercourse.

The reasons it might take longer for women to reach orgasm during sex with a partner includes lack of communication about sexual desires, emotional complexities, and more.

One helpful fact is that kissing consistently makes for better sex. That, plus enhanced sexual and emotional communication, is likely to increase the pleasure and satisfaction women experience during lovemaking.

4. Sex is confidence-affirming for men.

Researcher Anne Campbell, a psychologist at Durham University in England surveyed more than 3,300 people between the ages of 17 and 40 about one-night stands and how they felt afterwards. While 54% of women had overall positive feelings the morning after, an overwhelming 80% of men did.

They said the one-night stand made them feel successful, excited, even euphoric.

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Within relationships, sex has a similar effect. Jordan Gray says that men want to feel that sex is regularly available within a relationship. Even if a man doesn’t actually have sex with his partner 24/7, he wants to know that his partner desires him.

This is not only a confidence-booster; it enhances his feelings of intimacy and connection inside the relationship.

5. Women get more attached after sex.

Women are more attached after sex because of the hormone oxytocin, which is released during lovemaking. According to Dr. Arun Ghosh of Spire Liverpool Hospital, oxytocin’s effects on the system include lowered defenses and heightened empathy and trust.

Susan Kuchinskas explains, “Oxytocin seems to have been ‘designed’ by nature to make a man and woman feel bonded after sex, so they would stay together and raise children.

“Today, the physiology of men and women still plays out according to this pattern. But estrogen seems to increase the calming and bonding effects of oxytocin, while testosterone seems to mute them. That’s why women tend to feel more attached after sex than men do.”

A final note: though the above stereotypes are true much of the time, no stereotype is 100% true and pervasive all the time, in every scenario. Each of the above stereotypes has its limits. While it is helpful and intriguing to know evolution and culture’s influence on us through these stereotypes, the quality of our lives and our interactions with the opposite sex are ultimately shaped by our own perception of the world and our own creative choices.

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Last Updated on October 18, 2018

50+ Best Motivational Quotes To Prepare You For Any Challenges In Life

50+ Best Motivational Quotes To Prepare You For Any Challenges In Life

Life is filled with highs and lows —happiness and struggles that will test your resilience and integrity, push you to overcome challenges and leave you with lessons that will make you even stronger on your way up.

It’s the way you feel and think about yourself, including your expectations and beliefs about what is possible to you, greatly determines everything that happens to you.

It all starts with your thoughts. When you change your thoughts, you transform the quality of your life. (Right, Nancy’s story is a typical example!)

Below is a list of the best motivational quotes to inspire you to start your day with a blast:

Quotes for self-assurance

1. Don’t downgrade your dream just to fit your reality, upgrade your conviction to match your destiny.

    2. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think.

      3. You are confined only by the walls you build yourself.

        4. The man who has confidence in himself gains the confidence of others

          5. You attract what you are, not what you want. If you want great, then be great.

            6. It’s not who you are that holds you behind, it’s who you think your are not.

              Quotes about positivity

              7. Stop being afraid of what could go wrong and think of what could go right.

                8. You should never regret anything in life. If it’s good, it’s wonderful. If it’s bad, it is experience.

                  9. Falling down is an accident, staying down is a choice.

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                    10. If you have the power to make someone happy, do it. The world needs more of that.

                      11. Always believe that something wonderful is about to happen.

                        12. Don’t be afraid to give up the good and go for great.

                          13. Remember that life’s greatest lessons are usually learned from worst times and from the worst mistakes.

                            Quotes for work and success

                            14. Don’t talk, just act. Don’t say, just show. Don’t promise, just prove.

                              15. Never stop doing great just because someone doesn’t give you credit.

                                16. Discipline is doing what needs to be done, even if you don’t want to.

                                  17. Work while they sleep. Learn while they party. Save while they spend. Live like they dream.

                                    18. The key to success is to focus our conscious mind on things we desire, not things we fear.

                                      19. Never apologize for having high standards, people who really want to be in your life will rise to meet them.

                                        20. If it doesn’t challenge you, it won’t change you.

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                                          21. Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it, time will pass anyway.

                                            22. Don’t fear failure. Fear being in the exact same place next year as you are today.

                                              23. A hill is just another opportunity to leave your competition behind.

                                                24. Don’t quit. You’re already in pain. You’re already hurt. Get a reward from it.

                                                  25. Hustle until you no longer need to introduce yourself.

                                                    26. You didn’t come this far only to come this far.

                                                      27. Be selective in your battles for sometimes peace is better than being right.

                                                        28 If we keep doing what we are doing, we’re going to keep getting what we’re getting.

                                                          29. You will never know your limits until you push yourself to them.

                                                            30. Do what you have to do until you can do what you want to do.

                                                              31. The man on top of the mountain didn’t fall there.

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                                                                32. If your dreams don’t scare you, they are not big enough.

                                                                  33. If you can’t handle stress, you won’t manage success.

                                                                    34. Don’t be pushed by your problems, be led by your dreams.

                                                                      35. Don’t mistake silence for weakness. Smart people don’t plan big moves out loud.

                                                                        36. Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.

                                                                          37. Obsessed is the word the lazy use to describe dedicated.

                                                                            38. You become who you spend your time with.

                                                                              39. Be stubborn about your goals and flexible about your methods.

                                                                                40. Hard work beats talent when talent doesn’t work hard.

                                                                                  41. If you don’t build your dreams, someone else will hire you to build theirs.

                                                                                    42. Between stimulus and response is our greatest power –the freedom to choose.

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                                                                                      43. What comes easy won’t last, what lasts won’t come easy.

                                                                                        44. Don’t limit your challenges, challenge your limits.

                                                                                          45. Work until your idols become your rivals.

                                                                                            Quotes about money

                                                                                            46. Formal education will make you a living. Self-education will make you a fortune.

                                                                                              47. I create new enemies every day, it’s called business.

                                                                                                48. When you have a Million Dollar vision, don’t surround yourself with 1 cent minds.

                                                                                                  49. You can’t get rich thinking poor.

                                                                                                    50. Doing what is comfortable is rarely profitable.

                                                                                                      51. If you can count your money, work harder.

                                                                                                        If you find yourself feeling lost and frustrated, it’s never too late to change things up. Check out this guide:

                                                                                                        How to Start Over and Reboot Your Life When It Seems Too Late

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