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5 Simple Techniques For Building Instant Rapport

5 Simple Techniques For Building Instant Rapport

“Connecting with people is so difficult.”

Those were the words I heard escape the lips of my once close friend from school. It seemed odd since this fellow didn’t exactly seem like the type to have issues connecting with people. If I recall correctly, in school, he seemed to get along just fine with those around him.

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However, I couldn’t resist doing a small analysis of his situation, asking him questions about his routine and dating life. After some sleuthing around, it struck me that he actually was having a problem connecting with people, or should I say, building rapport.

Aside from what he was telling me, I also noticed a few things about his demeanor and appearance that seemed to portray the wrong message. The signals he sent out were not the kind someone would respond to, let alone respond at all. He had no idea how these simple mistakes was affecting his ability to actually be approached and why approaching people wasn’t working out well for him.

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Here are 5 simple techniques for building instant rapport with anyone you meet.

1. Don’t Cross Your Arms When Speaking To Someone.

This may not seem like a big deal but crossing of the arms in psychological and legal analysis represents a certain type of defense or closing up. Generally, someone who folds their arms appear to be shielding themselves physically and emotionally from the outside world and other people. When building rapport, it’s best to keep your arms to your side and to depict a sense of comfort and receptiveness.

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2. Make Eye Contact

Eye contact is a sign of confidence and interest. When you make eye contact, you’re engaging more than one of your senses in the conversation which makes building rapport easier. It’s more of a skill, the more you practice, the better you get at maintaining eye contact with people you meet.

3. Use The Person’s Name

Okay so you don’t have to say their name every single minute but throw it in a few times during the conversation because this subconsciously registers that you are speaking directly to him/her. This is an important part of building rapport.  Have you ever noticed how a salesman asks your name before actually hitting you with his proposal? Use this simple technique when having a conversation with someone to build an immediate connection.

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4. The Smile and Handshake

It’s easy to forget to smile when you’re feeling nervous and shy. It’s quite okay to feel nervous but don’t let that hinder you from smiling. You want people to be attracted to the happy aura you possess – it’s a great way of connecting with people. Practice smiling, it need not be ear to ear, just a small friendly smile. Apart from a smile, physical contact is another well known means of building rapport – make sure to engage in a formal yet friendly handshake, keep it short and sweet.

5. Be Genuine and Honest

One of the best things you could ever do when trying to connect with someone is to be be genuine. Don’t put on a fake smile, don’t fake a good mood, don’t give a fake compliment, let the things you say and do be real and honest. Honesty is the key to building any good connection and relationship – achieve that by being as genuine as possible.Pay someone a real compliment, have good intentions and you’ll find that building rapport will be much easier.

The key to good rapport is to identify with someone, open yourself up to being approached and approachable, portray a friendly demeanor listen for potential follow up questions in conversation and you’ll be sure to connect with people easier. Try to draw on similarities, choose to approach people You identify as relate-able but most of all, allow it to be a fun and great experience.

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Last Updated on October 9, 2018

27 Ways to Instantly Feel Better When You’re Down

27 Ways to Instantly Feel Better When You’re Down

Who has never gone through some ups and downs in the life? But some people can feel better in a quicker way than others because they’ve found their own remedies to heal the bad feelings.

If you haven’t found yours, these ways will help you instantly feel better and ditch that negative self talk when you’re feeling bad about yourself:

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  1. Listen to the songs you loved when you were in high school or university, this will recall you of the old good times.
  2. Write something. Write down how you feel as a way to express your thoughts if you don’t feel like talking to anyone.
  3. Draw something. Draw anything you want because no one’s going to judge your drawing skills.
  4. Read the postcards or letters your friends or family sent you before, remind yourself there are people who always remember you.
  5. Silently think of a day or moment which you truly enjoyed and try to recapture that very first feeling. Was it the day of your graduation? The moment you traveled with your loved one?
  6. Take out your photo albums and go over your childhood photos.
  7. Cry when you feel like doing so. There’s nothing wrong with crying; cry out all your fear and stress and just face the truth after crying.
  8. Sing loudly like no one can hear you. Do you know that in Japan, people always sing karaoke to relieve stress?
  9. Cook a nice meal for yourself or for your family.
  10. Read your previous diary entries and look at your great memories.
  11. Dress up nicely to feel happier.
  12. Don’t stay in your bed! Get your laptop or a book and sit in a coffee place.
  13. Take a walk outside and feel the fresh air.
  14. Sweat yourself! Go jogging or play some sports.
  15. Pick up the musical instrument you used to play a lot and start to play it.
  16. Tidy up your desk or wardrobe, you’ll feel good that you’re being productive and actually doing something.
  17. Watch some funny videos, sure you can find a lot of them on Youtube.
  18. Eat something you like, be it a chocolate cake, or an ice-cream. Just please yourself with the flavour you like.
  19. Re-read your favorite book and write down the sentences or passages that you love.
  20. Watch a new movie, there must be a movie which you’ve always interested in but had no time to watch it.
  21. Do something nice that no one will notice, say picking up a rubbish in the street and throw it to a trash bin.
  22. Call your best friend and just talk whatever you want! Human beings are social animals after all, connecting with people close to you will make you feel better.
  23. Do voluntary work and help people in need, you’ll feel happy and satisfied.
  24. Get drunk with your close friends at home – a safe place for you to get drunk and get crazy. Let loose and have fun with your very close friends.
  25. Write an email or a note to a friend who you care about.
  26. Get out of your routine life and meet new friends. Get out of your comfort zone! Meeting new people can give you new inspirations in life.
  27. Look into the mirror and smile. Act like today’s already a wonderful day. How we act affects how we feel. It’s difficult to go on feeling sad if you’re trying to smile!

Remember:

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It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.  — Epictetus

If you want to feel better, change what you’re doing because obviously what you’re doing doesn’t make you happy!

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Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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