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5 Conversation and Interaction Tips

5 Conversation and Interaction Tips

I had a phone call yesterday with someone very important, and important to me. But for the life of me, I couldn’t recall a single word of what we’d talked about. (If I’d followed my own hack and written the conversation directly into the contact notes section in Gmail, I’d be saved, but I didn’t.) I really faltered for a short while, so this gave me some thoughts on how it could go differently in the future.

Conversation and Interaction Tips

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  • If you’ve met someone only once or twice before, and then run into them at a conference or other social gathering, introduce yourself again, complete with some tidbits from the last talk. Say, “Hey Heidi. I’m Chris Brogan. We talked at PodCamp Boston about video podcasting for farmers.” That way, she has every chance in the world to save “face,” and also get immediately back into the time frame of when she met you, and what happened. This works much better than, “Hey Heidi!” and then you wait to see if they remember you. That’s really just low-handed at that point.
  • If you’re forgetful, state it up front. Don’t try to play catch up. “I’m really sorry, Russ. I know we were having this call to talk about something important, but I can’t find my notes, and I’m blanking. Could you lead off?” It’s straightforward, and gets the other person on your side. (Only a jerk would be terribly offended).
  • Make that person number one. It’s just downright rude to do the crowdsurfing eyeball thing while talking with someone. But here’s one way to move through a crowd a little faster. Upon shaking hands and reconnecting, make your first statement after re-acquainting yourself, “Oh Casey, I have so much I want to talk with you about, but I’ve got to run off in just a second. Will you be around for a while?” Then, you can have a few minutes of conversation, putting Casey at the focus of your attention, and she’ll understand when you have to leave after a few minutes. Be honest about this.
  • Share the wealth. You’re passionate, and want to tell the other person all about your project and your perspective, but be sure to ask them engaging questions about what he or she are doing. Be genuinely interested. Find out what they’re passionate about. Learn as much in those few minutes as you can, because it’s way more fun than talking about the weather.
  • Close with something actionable. If you need NOTHING from this person, ask them, “How can I help you with your goals? What can I be thinking about in my day to help you be successful?” If you have needs, ask them to consider contacting you for a follow-up meeting, or for whatever you need. Taking donations? Ask them if you can help them decide on sending money to your event? (I’m doing a lot of that now). It will make the conversation feel more valuable.

There are variations, and this isn’t exactly for every conversation you have, but I think these tips will be useful to your interactions around professional settings. I’m learning more than anything else in this new world that the connections you make are more important than any line of code you write, or any song you perform. It’s what you do to grow your personal network and develop a system of friends and colleagues that will sustain you in the future.

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–Chris Brogan is passionately creating an audio and video podcast company. He writes about it often at [chrisbrogan.com]. He’s also co-founder and Organizer of PodCamp Boston, and is looking for participants and donations alike. Stop by.

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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