Most of us have probably heard the phrase “Change is an inside job”, but how many of us actually do it?
A lot of people want their lives to change for the better but not everyone pulls it off mainly because they feel chained to their present circumstances. And while external factors do play a role in how your life shapes out, the fact is, most of the things holding you back are living inside your head.
Kick those ideas and mindsets out, and you’ll start seeing the world in a more positive light. Doors will open up, great ideas will come to you more often, and you’ll have a much better life in general. The big positive changes that you want your life to have can actually be achieved by making small adjustments to how you think.
And the best part is it’s not even that hard. You just have to train yourself to think and look at life a little differently.
Not sure where or how to begin? Below are a few mind shifts that you can try right now to reframe your problems in order to start feeling more positive:
“I need to spend less.” vs. “I need to earn more.”
I’m all up for saving money, but if you’re sitting there feeling sorry for yourself because you don’t have enough money or resources, then perhaps it’s time to start thinking about how to GET MORE of what you need. Instead of depriving yourself from the things that you want, open your mind and find ways to earn more money so you can afford the finer things in life.
The “spend less” mindset is very restrictive and can make you feel stuck to your current situation. It tells you that you have to limit yourself in terms of what to spend or how to act. On the other hand, the “earn more” way of thinking opens you up for ideas and opportunities, thus allowing you to aim higher and reach your potential.
“I can’t” vs. “I won’t.”
As the fabulous Marie Forleo put it, saying that we “can’t” is just one of those BS excuses standing between us and what we want. And 99% of the time, “can’t” is just a euphemism for the word “won’t.”
Can’t afford that self-development course? Nope. The truth is if you really wanted to, you would find a way to come up with the money for it. Can’t attend that seminar because you “don’t have time”? Wrong again. Because if you were really determined to go, you would MAKE time.
In reality, there’s hardly any situation in which you LITERALLY can’t do something. Most of the time, the only person holding you back is you.
Whenever you find yourself saying you can’t do something, ask yourself: are you really powerless to take action or are you just using the “can’t” excuse because you don’t want to work harder or you just don’t want something bad enough?
Do yourself a favor and free yourself from the “can’t” mindset and own up to your decisions. You’ll feel more empowered for it because unlike the word “can’t” which puts you in the victim’s position, the word “won’t” puts you in the driver’s seat and allows you to be completely honest and responsible for your choices and actions.
“I failed.” vs. “I learned.”
A lot of people refuse to take risks or try new things because they’re scared of failure. What’s ironic though is that doing so actually sets you up for even greater failure because it puts you in a situation where you fail by default. (Hat tip to JK Rowling.)
And while I do agree that facing your fear helps you get rid of it, I’ve found that a more practical way to deal with fear of failure is to think of failing as a learning experience instead.
Seeing failure as a learning opportunity immediately converts the former into something positive. After all, the more you learn the better and smarter you’ll become, and the higher your chances of succeeding in the future. After a failure has occurred, reframe it to think about what lessons can be learned so that you reduce the chances of repeating the same mistakes.
So go ahead and fail learn. Do it quickly, and do it often. Keep trying. Your future, more successful self, will thank you for it.