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29 Life Lessons You Should Learn by 30

29 Life Lessons You Should Learn by 30

Your thirties are just like your twenties except the recovery takes longer. When I was a kid, I thought there was some magic line you crossed and suddenly became an adult. Adults can easily look at the world around them and know maturity doesn’t come with age. Aging is something you can neither control nor stop; be prepared with these important life lessons.

1. You Only Die Once

    6 million ways to die…choose one…

    You only get one shot at life. What you do with your time in this world is your choice, but understand that you’re the only one who has to live with the consequences. You don’t get a second chance.

    2. You Can’t Turn Back Time

      Keanu Reeves’s’s’s best role…

      Reflecting on the past is ok, but keep in mind, it’s in the past. You can never go back and relive a moment, so focus on how to do things in the present for your future.

      3. Compassion Is Key

        Dark Knight feelin…

        Whether someone is a hero or villain depends on who you ask. People who are only nice to their friends are villains to everyone else. Everyone deserves compassion, not just your friends.

        4. Hangovers Suck

          An actual hangover is better than the movies…

          In your twenties, you can drink a keg of beer, sleep two hours, and make it to work in the morning. In your thirties, two beers get you turnt up, overnighters cause you to pass out in the middle of the day, and a daily detox is almost mandatory.

          5. Your Body Is Your Temple

            I feel pretty…oh so pretty…

            You may feel like your twenties are your physical peak, but it’s actually your thirties. It’s all downhill from here, so take care of your body. You’re stuck in it.

            6. It’s OK to Say No

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              Howie’s on-air marriage proposal didn’t work out…

              It doesn’t matter what anyone thinks – if you don’t want to do something, go somewhere, or talk to someone, just say no.

              7. Relationships Take Compromise

                The NSA – where everybody knows your name…

                There is no perfect relationship. Behind every facade you see on the surface lies countless hours of discussion and compromise. If you don’t think of your partner, they’ll leave you for someone who does, whether to your face or behind your back.

                8. Everyone Snoops

                  Agent Double-O Giggity…

                  We can all stand on our soapboxes about the NSA spying on us, but they’re far from the only ones. Every company you shop at spies on you, and so do all of your friends and people you meet. Be mindful of what info you leave out for others to find.

                  9. Money Isn’t Important

                    Young Moneyyyyy…

                    Fresh out of college, it’s natural to seek out the job with the most money. The truth is the economy it’s more important to follow your passion than chase paper. You can’t buy time, and plenty of broke people are happy.

                    10. You’re in Control

                      Why you should let your gf win at video games…

                      Your choices are your own. Your mistakes don’t belong to your parents, a deity, your enemies, or anyone else. You are the creator of your own world.

                      11. Life Is Just Like High School

                        “This isn’t high school” is such a common phrase. It’s not like people graduate and suddenly mature. It doesn’t matter how old you get or where you work, there are cliques, gossip, and all the other annoyances of high school. Either play the game or hit the showers.

                        12. You’re Wrong Sometimes

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                          R.I.P. Community…you will be missed…

                          Everyone makes mistakes, and, no matter how good your grades were in school, you don’t know everything. Learn to admit when you’re wrong, especially if you’re a guy. Chicks dig humility.

                          13. Respect Is Earned

                            I iz actually spasticated…

                            When you finally move out on your own into the real world, you may feel like a monarch, but you’re no better than anyone else. There’s no inherent respect that comes with your degree, career, or position in life. If you don’t treat everyone with respect, you’ll lose theirs.

                            14. Rules Are Only Guidelines

                              It’s ok to have a crush on Emma Watson…she’s legal now…

                              Some rules are made to keep us safe, and some are just leftovers from times past. People break laws on a daily basis, even if it’s simple things like speeding or littering. Blindly following people can lead you to act against your own personal ethics – ask questions and make your own decisions.

                              15. Goals Are Vital

                                I believe I can fly…

                                If you have no direction in life, you’ll never get anywhere. Set short and long term goals and follow them. Otherwise you’ll end up stuck in an entry-level position for the rest of your life.

                                16. Hatred Wastes Energy

                                  What’s a goof to a goblin?

                                  People do terrible things, and everyone has an opinion about it. The older you get, the less those minor things matter to you. Focus your efforts on improving your life instead of ruining someone else’s.

                                  17. It’s Never Too Late

                                    Grumpy old men are worse than kids…

                                    You’re never too old. I was at a barbeque last weekend talking to some friends. Approaching thirty, Judge da Boss was worried about getting too old for his music career to blow up. Vik Junior reminded him most of today’s hottest MCs (Jay-Z, Snoop, Eminem, etc.) are in their forties. People found success later in their lives than you think.

                                    18. Tomorrow Isn’t Guaranteed

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                                      I’ll procrastinate tomorrow…

                                      The younger you are, the more invincible you feel. As you get older, you realize there is no tomorrow and learn to appreciate the time you have.

                                      19. College Is Overrated

                                        Had Bill Gates went to college, Microsoft may not suck so much…

                                        Knowledge is important, but a degree isn’t. Plenty of people found success in life without one. It’s more important to open your mind, keep learning, and trust your instincts. You can always hire someone with a degree later.

                                        20. Pop Culture Fades

                                          Another future singing competition judge…

                                          In your teens, you know every song and artist on the radio. As you progress through your twenties, you know less and less about those young bucks. By the time you’re thirty, people are buzzing about people you’ve never heard of, and nobody remembers Color Me Badd.

                                          21. Gossip Wastes Time

                                            So I was like…and she was like…

                                            I’ve never been asked about anyone’s sex life in a job interview. There’s no need to discuss other peoples’ lives unless you’re Perez Hilton. If you are Perez Hilton, welcome to Lifehack – try not to draw all over the pictures like a 2-year-old.

                                            22. Your Parents Are Hypocrites

                                              Do as I say, not as I do…

                                              Sooner or later, you’ll reach the age your parents were when you were a kid. When you reach that age, you’ll look back and realize all the things they told you not to do are things they did. You were totally right back then. It’s a shame you can’t go back and redo it.

                                              23. You’re Just Like Your Parents

                                                This is a story all about how Smith’s life got flipped, turned upside down…

                                                Whether you believe in nature or nurture shaping who we are, you’re exactly like your parents. The older you get, the more you realize it, and it’ll drive you nuts.

                                                24. Overnight Success Doesn’t Exist

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                                                  Yappy dogs are annoying…

                                                  Behind every overnight success you see is years of struggle nobody saw. It may look like other people have things handed to them or are illuminati, but they got on their grind and worked twice as hard as you. If you’re not where you want to be, work harder.

                                                  25. Life Isn’t Fair

                                                    It never is, princess…

                                                    Life isn’t fair for anyone, so it’s fair in that sense. A lot of really good people get shit on; that’s just the way it is. Good people are taken from us too early, and you’ll take heat for things you didn’t do.

                                                    26. It’s Not What You Know; It’s How You Apply It

                                                      A jack of all trades is a master of none…

                                                      Promotions may be automatic in school, but in the real world qualified people are constantly overlooked. The game exists, whether you like it or not, so you better play if you want to get ahead. You have to work twice as hard for half as much as those in power.

                                                      27. People Will Hate You

                                                        Try our new flavors…

                                                        The more you speak and the more you do, the more hatred you’ll attract. You can’t please all of the people all of the time, so focus on pleasing yourself…just not in a school zone.

                                                        28. You’re Not Entitled to Anything

                                                          Per Tyrion’s request, I present the goddess of tits and wine…

                                                          Nobody hands you anything in life. No matter who you are or what you accomplished in the past, success won’t be handed to you. If you want success, don’t wait for it to knock – hunt it down, stalk it, and bang on its door until it opens for you.

                                                          29. No One’s Keeping Score

                                                            Gymnastics: and other sports we only care about once every 4 years…

                                                            You can follow every rule, do everything right, and live a perfect life. No matter what you do, you’re still going to die just like everyone else, and you can’t take anything with you when you do. Step off your soapbox and stop judging other peoples’ decisions.

                                                            Featured photo credit: Geralt via pixabay.com

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                                                            Last Updated on May 28, 2020

                                                            10 Success Principles for Living Your Dream Life

                                                            10 Success Principles for Living Your Dream Life

                                                            Are you stressed out and overwhelmed, wishing you had more time to do the things that really matter? Are you ready to do something better, something special in your life or your career?

                                                            You were born with a gift that no one else in the world can express like you. When you dance to your own music, you naturally develop your innate abilities and excel in work and life. You are a total rock star. But when you live someone else’s idea of who you should be, it throws off your groove.

                                                            Many people—maybe you—stopped following their dreams way too early in life because their talents were ignored, minimized, or shamed. They didn’t have the chops to win an American Idol competition or nab an Olympic gold medal, so they stopped expressing their inborn gifts altogether.

                                                            You don’t need to be an award winner to rock your life. Living your dream life is about discovering your superpowers and feeling vibrant and joyful when you use them. It’s about owning what makes you unique and finding like-minded people to support you.

                                                            Here are 10 success principles to help you live a rich and rewarding life on your terms that have worked with thousands of people in my workshops and will work for you, too.

                                                            1. Get a Hobby to Move Closer to Your Dreams

                                                            If you never became a professional dancer or a world-renowned author, it does NOT mean you should stop dancing or writing! These activities make you come alive, even if you “only” do them as favorite pastimes.

                                                            Engaging in a hobby is one of the most important success principles you can follow to move closer to your dreams.

                                                            When you try something creative for the first time or in a long while, you begin to see opportunities at work and in life that you were unaware of before. You also feel happier and more energized, according to a recent study from New Zealand.[1]

                                                            Some of my most burned-out executive clients reinvigorated their careers by discovering a creative outlet that refueled them after the workday ended. Research at San Francisco State University shows that having a hobby lowers stress and helps you succeed at work.[2]

                                                            So, give yourself permission to try new things and revisit old passions you gave up long ago. Setting aside just one hour a week for personal exploration can significantly change your life.

                                                            Who knows? Your creative outlet could transform into a thriving business or lead to a new profession down the road.

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                                                            2. Focus on Your Strengths, Not Your Weaknesses

                                                            Did you know that you are more likely to succeed when you develop your natural strengths rather than work on your weaknesses? The problem is that you probably don’t know where your true talents lie.

                                                            Here are a few options to help you discover your unique strengths. You can:

                                                            • Take the VIA Character Strengths Survey[3]
                                                            • Try Gallup’s CliftonStrengths Assessment[4]
                                                            • Answer a few Superpower Questions

                                                            Once you understand what makes you tick, you can use these skills at work and your personal life to get more done in less time. If you boost your unique abilities through practice and study, you can accelerate your career and become a leader in a field that matters to you. It’s worth investing in yourself this way.

                                                            3. Jumping off a Cliff is NOT Required

                                                            Here’s the deal: most people are too afraid to change. When participants first come to my workshops, they tell me they have mouths to feed, bills to pay, and fear that if they follow their dreams, someone will get hurt.

                                                            The old saying “leap and the net shall appear” does not comfort them. Because they are hesitant to plunge into the unknown, they believe their only option is to stay put where they are in life. Can you relate?

                                                            You do not have to sacrifice the life you have now to start a new one. I was a psychology professor by day and singer by night for years before I transitioned into a full-time music career.

                                                            Just take a little time out each week to do what enlivens you through a hobby, volunteer work, etc. Get a feel for it.

                                                            Is it what you really want? If so, increase the time you spend doing it and make the transition when the time feels right.

                                                            4. Give Your Inner Critic Some Love

                                                            The main culprit that keeps you from stepping outside your comfort zone and getting the life of your dreams is KCRP or K-CRAP – the radio station that plays 24/7 in your head. The moment you try to do something interesting with your life it slaps you down with such chart-topping killer hooks as “Who do you think you are?” and “You’ll never be good enough!”.

                                                            Have you ever noticed that KCRP’s mean-spirited DJ sounds like your parents, teachers, bosses, and other authority figures who shut you down creatively? These folks don’t need to stifle you any longer (although they often still do) because your inner critic does it for them. That keeps you stuck in a rut.

                                                            To break free, try thinking of this DJ as a gruff old grandfather who gives you crap to keep you safe. Remember, this grumpy grandpa is woefully out of touch with the times. So, his stern opinions don’t really matter much, do they? Give him a pat on the back for his good intentions, and put your focus back on what makes you come alive.

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                                                            This success principle will give you the courage to venture into the unknown where you can dance to the beat of your own drummer.

                                                            5. Embrace Your Inner Weirdo

                                                            Many of us don’t go after our dreams because we’re afraid folks will find out how odd or strange we are. But our little eccentricities often turn out to be our greatest strengths. Yes, it’s good to be quirky.

                                                            Odds are, you lost track of your true passions and talents before you were even old enough to know you were getting off-track. You became slowly “adulterated” by learning to:

                                                            • Take on family roles that don’t match who you really are.
                                                            • Spit back what teachers taught you in school rather than risk getting bad grades for being original.
                                                            • Hide parts of yourself that don’t seem acceptable to certain social groups.

                                                            The price for fitting in is that you may wind up leading a life that doesn’t fit you all that well. Your true calling becomes clear when you embrace what makes you different from others and allow yourself to stand out from the crowd, even if it feels awkward.

                                                            Often, the very qualities you view as your flaws are your greatest gifts.

                                                            6. See the Bigger Picture to Find Your True Calling

                                                            I cannot stress the importance of this success principle enough. Your true calling is right in front of you. But you may miss it because you’re looking for it in the wrong place.

                                                            To “see” it clearly, try widening your point of view.

                                                            Case in point: Maria felt she needed to retire early from being a police detective, so she could travel abroad. I encouraged Maria to think of ways that she could continue to serve as a law enforcer (a career she loved) and travel overseas at the same time.

                                                            A few months later, Maria landed a job with the United Nations in Bosnia training the local police force to understand and embrace human rights procedures.

                                                            Like Maria, you are an everyday rock star capable of accomplishing greater things than you can imagine. Is what you’re looking for right in front of you, too? Do you have an inkling of what it may be?

                                                            Look beyond your day-to-day activities, your current job, and even the town you live in. View your life from an eagle’s perspective and be open to new possibilities.

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                                                            7. Try a Little Wish-List Magic

                                                            Pretend I’m your fairy godmother and I give you permission right now to be your most magnificent self. What kind of life would be music to your ears? It doesn’t matter whether it seems unattainable or even downright crazy. Write it down on a wish list.

                                                            Get quiet. Be honest. Think big.

                                                            What would you like your career, your relationships, your health, your finances, and your spiritual life to be like? Jot down enough details so that your wishes seem tangible to you. Then, look at this list every morning before you start your day and every night before you go to sleep.

                                                            Sounds silly? It’s not. It works! Permitting yourself to daydream about a rich and fulfilling life is the first step to manifesting it.

                                                            8. Take Breaks to Get Clues About Your Ideal Future

                                                            Did you know that working straight through to a deadline leads to diminishing returns? Research shows that taking a break for 15 minutes every 75 to 90 minutes can help you recharge, refresh your focus, and get more done in less time.[5]

                                                            Wait, it gets better! A Stanford study shows that walking increases your creative output increases by 60 percent. Doing repetitive activities such as walking, running, riding your bike, swimming, and sweeping allow solutions to problems to pop into your mind out of nowhere.[6]

                                                            What does this success principle have to do with creating your dream life?

                                                            These mini-breaks allow you to get vital clues for what to do next to attain your ideal future. Plus, you won’t waste precious time and energy getting lost in other people’s agendas.

                                                            9. Take Action on Your Inspired Ideas

                                                            Once an inspired thought pops into your mind, take action.

                                                            This is one of the most powerful success principles for turning your dreams into reality; the sooner the better. Whatever it is—from calling an old friend to taking a new route home—be sure to do it!

                                                            Pay attention to your oddball hunches. You need to go after what you want, not just dream about it. As comedian Jim Carrey warns,

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                                                            “You can’t just visualize and go eat a sandwich.”

                                                            10. Count Your Rockstar Moments

                                                            Still not sure you have what it takes to get your dream life? This final success principle is guaranteed to help.

                                                            Make a list of everything you’ve ever accomplished. As you read back through it, put a star next to each item, and let it sink in.

                                                            You’ll be pleasantly surprised by how good you’ll feel about yourself afterward. You’ll also see how effective you’ve been in the past at getting what you want. You’ve succeeded before, you can succeed again.

                                                            You already rock. You just need to own it. Trust me, you’ve got this!

                                                            Final Thoughts

                                                            Eleanor Roosevelt said,

                                                            “The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”

                                                            Following these success principles will help you find the time and energy to do the things that really matter and live with clear intention.

                                                            By spending just one hour a week doing something you love, focusing on your strengths and achievements, embracing what makes you different, and acting on inspired ideas, you can create a life that is a perfect fit for you, step-by-step.

                                                            If you don’t have a clue about what your dream life could look like yet, don’t worry. Your heart knows. It has been “talking” to you for a long time. It’s just being muffled by KCRP, buried under a lot of “shoulds” and fear.

                                                            This article can also help you figure out the life you truly want to live: How to Get Motivated and Be Happy Every Day When You Wake Up.

                                                            Stand still, get quiet, and listen. It’s constantly telling you what you need to do to realize your own rockstar potential. It may be just a whisper now, but the more you pay attention to it, the louder it will get, and the easier it will be to follow.

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                                                            Featured photo credit: Rahul Dey via unsplash.com

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