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24 Things Only Antisocial People Understand

24 Things Only Antisocial People Understand

1. If you can, you refuse most jobs unless you can work by yourself, in the back, or quietly (like a cook, librarian or from home). The front counter, retail or waiting tables would be pure agony. Not you:

    2. You avoid complaining, giving opinions or advice…even when asked. It leads to conversation.

      3. In turn, you don’t often tell your troubles to others. See reason #2 above.

        4. You find yourself in mental torture weighing the pros and cons of seeing your favorite band live and

        having to deal with…the masses.

          5. You avoid eye contact and/or smiling for too long since it’s an invitation for people to approach you.

            6. Your animals–toys or real–know how social you can be. Am I right?

              7. You find yourself thinking how it’s not that you’re shy, it’s just that…you don’t care for most who speak to you.

                8. In fact, you never admire the loud “alpha” dominating the room. You feel very much the opposite towards them.

                  9. You understand the difference between snobbery and wanting to be left in your thoughts.

                    10. You don’t mind that others consider you snobby, nonetheless.

                      11. You are a-okay with others, including your parents, siblings or friends, hogging the spotlight. You were always better working behind the scenes.

                        12. You lock yourself in your room…sometimes for months.

                          13. Have Hikikomori? After careful research: yup.

                            14. You find yourself wondering in what ways Hikikomori is either “concerning” or a “condition.”

                              15. You fantasize about moving to a country where everyone respects quietude.

                                16. You sometimes even refuse to register on your favorite forum threads even when you could contribute a valuable new perspective.

                                  17. When people look into your eyes, you’re told it’s as if you’re in another world (you prefer the label “ethereal”).

                                  17

                                    18. The first time they speak to you, you’re polite. The second time, you’re terse. The third time, you literally stop speaking and avoid them. No hard feelings.

                                      19. You say hello when you pass someone you know. Upon seeing them again, you believe they should recall your initial greeting and ignore you.

                                        20. You find yourself questioning why others have to be so damn loud. Unless there’s a major disaster, nothing warrants it.

                                          21. You’re exhausted after a trip to the mall: you’ve been around too many people for too long and you need to recoup.

                                            22. Dating online comes much more naturally to you…you don’t have to speak and you can always delete.

                                              23. You find yourself questioning why strangers still approach you…despite the disinterested looks, headphones you’re wearing and the very obvious ignores the first couple of times they attempt.

                                                24. You know the difference between “anti-social” (an actual personality disorder for those lacking a conscience) and you: a quiet observer of the world (aka “asocial”).

                                                  Featured photo credit: hiding / Enrico Policardo via flickr.com

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                                                  Last Updated on January 18, 2019

                                                  7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

                                                  7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

                                                  Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

                                                  But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

                                                  If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

                                                  1. Limit the time you spend with them.

                                                  First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

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                                                  In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

                                                  Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

                                                  2. Speak up for yourself.

                                                  Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

                                                  3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

                                                  This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

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                                                  But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

                                                  4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

                                                  Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

                                                  This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

                                                  Why else would they be sharing this with you?

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                                                  5. Change the subject.

                                                  When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

                                                  Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

                                                  6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

                                                  Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

                                                  I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

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                                                  You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

                                                  Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

                                                  7. Leave them behind.

                                                  Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

                                                  If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

                                                  That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

                                                  You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

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