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13 Things Your Mother Wants You To Learn From Her

13 Things Your Mother Wants You To Learn From Her

Parenting is never an easy job. Parents always try their best to raise their child and hope their child will take their advice to be a good and successful person. Noor Al-Hajri shared on Quora what advice her mother gave her, which is probably what every mother wants her children to know about.

  1. Just Wait it out – Patience is a virtue. When facing an impossible task/decision, sleep on it.
  2. When you marry, you marry a familyMake sure it’s a good one:
    With marriage, you don’t just get the person you marry. But his/her morals, habits, values, genetics, culture, language and anything at home that contributed to their upbringing (the good & the not-so-good). Inclusive of all this, you gain new family members – you want to make sure that you are aware & accepting of the entire package when you have kids, you’ll truly understand what it’s like to love someone more than yourself.
  3. You are not Old! You’re a 9 year old Adult (on my 27th birthday – This is more of a statement than advice, but it changed my outlook).
  4. Whatever it is that you want to do, Do it now. – Worrying is not doing. Just Start.
  5. Keep Receipts, Documents and everything. You never know when you may need it. Take Photos, even if you think you don’t look good. It will pass & you will have saved a memory.
  6. Cook – so you can feed yourself, stay healthy, save money & entertain others. Eat like royalty but dress modestly.
  7. Say No to Credit. Debt ties you down. Learn to budget.
  8. Don’t tell others your plans. – A few reasons are:
    – Sometimes, sharing with others can hamper/change your plans. Opinions affect decisions.
    – There’s an element of satisfaction that comes from sharing with others that may delay you from taking further action, as you already feel good.
    – Not all people have your best interest at heart, this is only natural. They can potentially hurt you with the information you volunteer. (This is why many people in my life until today prefer not to join Social sites like FB, foursquare etc..) – (hat tip to Sam Feder for pointing out that I needed to elaborate on this further)
  9. Don’t judge a person based on a single actionPeople are more complex than that. Anyone can have a bad day. It’s not always about you. Learn to listen.
  10. The World doesn’t ‘owe’ You. You are not entitled to anythingYou want somethingwork for it. Then work some more.
  11. Happiness is a choice you make everyday not an outcome. Choose to be happy and love yourself, so that others can love you. Avoid negative people.
  12. Travel, Teach, Volunteer, Read (a lot), try new things and make mistakes while you are young – it will help you mature and keep you humble.
  13. Don’t hold grudges. It’s hard but if you want to succeed you cannot hold grudges. Let it go. Harbor compassion instead.

More by this author

Anna Chui

Anna is a communication expert and a life enthusiast. She's the Content Strategist of Lifehack and loves to write about love, life, and passion.

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Last Updated on March 5, 2021

Science Says People Who Talk To Themselves Are Geniuses

Science Says People Who Talk To Themselves Are Geniuses

I talk a lot to myself. It helps me to keep my concentration on the activity on hand, makes me focus more on my studies, and gives me some pretty brilliant ideas while chattering to myself; more importantly, I produce better works. For example, right now, as I am typing, I am constantly mumbling to myself. Do you talk to yourself? Don’t get embarrassed admitting it because science has discovered that those who talk to themselves are actually geniuses… and not crazy!

Research Background

Psychologist-researcher Gary Lupyan conducted an experiment where 20 volunteers were shown objects, in a supermarket, and were asked to remember them. Half of them were told to repeat the objects, for example, banana, and the other half remained silent. In the end, the result shown that self-directed speech aided people to find the objects faster, by 50 to 100 milliseconds, compared to the silent ones.

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“I’ll often mutter to myself when searching for something in the refrigerator or the supermarket shelves,” said Gary Lupyan.

This personal experience actually made him conduct this experiment. Lupyan, together with another psychologist, Daniel Swigley, came up with the outcomes that those to talk to oneself are geniuses. Here are the reasons:

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It stimulates your memory

When you are talking to yourself, your sensory mechanism gets activated. It gets easier on your memory since you can visualize the word, and you can act accordingly.[1]

It helps stay focused

When you are saying it loud, you stay focused on your task,[2] and it helps you recognise that stuff immediately. Of course, this only helps if you know what the object you are searching looks like. For example, a banana is yellow in colour, and you know how a banana looks like. So when you are saying it loud, your brain immediately pictures the image on your mind. But if you don’t know what banana looks like, then there is no effect of saying it loud.

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It helps you clarify your thoughts

Every one of us tends to have various types of thoughts. Most make sense, while the others don’t. Suppose you are furious at someone and you feel like killing that person. Now for this issue you won’t run to a therapist, will you? No, what you do is lock yourself in a room and mutter to yourself. You are letting go off the anger by talking to yourself, the pros and cons of killing that person, and eventually you calm down. This is a silly thought that you have and are unable to share it with any other person. Psychologist Linda Sapadin said,[3]

“It helps you clarify your thoughts, tend to what’s important and firm up any decisions you are contemplating.”

Featured photo credit: Girl Using Laptop In Hotel Room/Ed Gregory via stokpic.com

Reference

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