Nowadays, many people’s lives are full of worries that have a negative influence both on their lives, and on their positive thinking.
Some can forget about the importance of positive thinking in their life, and these are the people who always try to solve some problems, whether at work or at home, and these worries poison their mind again and again.
These are simple things that people may not even notice. If the situation is familiar to you, then this list of 10 everyday worries that influence positive thinking is right for you. Let’s see what useless anxieties can affect your optimism, and let’s find a solution to all of them.
10 worries that influence your positive thinking
1. You don’t have time: to complete the project, to do the shopping, or even to call your relatives… in general, the list is endless! Life’s constant rush interferes with accomplishing tasks both in your private life and at work, which may keep you worrying all the time, thus preventing positive thinking.
Solution: Always try to find some time for yourself, your family, your hobbies, etc. This will help you to relax and free your mind from negative thoughts.
2. Competition: Yes, today it’s extremely high—everyone wants to be the best, and in this fight people can to forget about their personality, dignity, and positivity. Things such as as lying, betrayal, and other similar traits become more and more popular.
Solution:Stop for a moment and think about your place in life. Where are you? What are you? What is your purpose? Do such “jungles” make you feel good? Stop this pursuit and think of what is the most important in your life.
3. You can’t do several things at once: It has become important to demand from an average person to be like Julius Caesar, who managed to do at least three things at once. In general, the human mind can only focus on one thing at a time, and doing several actions at once reduces your creativity and quality of your work with all its consequences. All this causes great stress.
Solution: Set priorities, with everything in specific order. This is the best way to manage to do everything.
4. Wealth and money. Even if you have this you can’t stop worrying about it. In the pursuit of wealth, a person can forget about everything else, fall into depression, and live in a state of anxiety all the time.
Solution:Remember one important thing: money is only a tool, not a goal. Try to spend less time thinking about money, and focus on other joys in life.
5. Aging: Youth—either natural, or achieved with the help of tremendous efforts and money—has been deemed vitally important nowadays. It is believed that a young-looking person is necessarily successful and happy, which is why many people begin to worry at the first sign of wrinkles, even at the age of 25.
Solution: Maintaining a positive attitude is a great way to look good. If you’re a positive person, nearly everyone will like you.
6. Information: In the mind of a modern person there’s a stereotype that having information equals being successful. That’s why many worry about news that they didn’t have time to hear, read or understand.
Solution:Remember that you can’t know everything in the world. Learn only the information that you really need, and avoid bad news, especially that which is depressing.
7. Norms of life: Lots of people are worried about the fact that their life is somehow wrong. When worrying about similarity with others, some important things can be lost, such as individuality and authenticity.
Solution: Forget about what others might think or say. In worrying about the thoughts of your coworkers, neighbors, or relatives, you risk losing yourself.
8. Love: It is human nature to worry constantly about love; cases when you don’t have it and you’re lonely, when you have it and you’re worrying to lose it, or when you lost it and now you’re in despair.
Solution: Certainly, love is a magical feeling, but it doesn’t depend on your desires. It’s better to live your life today without worrying about it; you’ll see then that everything will be alright.
9. Accidents: A ton of negative information is received daily on TV about attacks, automobile and airplane crashes, natural disasters, etc. That’s why many people worry constantly about the things that may happen.
Solution:Try to be an optimist and believe in good. Fear doesn’t to anyone any good, so stay present and mindful.
10. Weather: It’s funny, but not only forecasters, pilots and geologists are worried about the weather conditions. If you count the number of times per day the average person hears, reads or watches the weather forecast, it is clear that the weather is a serious and constant anxiety for many people.
Solution:There’s no such thing as “bad weather”. Try to enjoy all types, and don’t worry about rain, snow and wind.
All these worries may be present in your everyday life and you don’t even notice how they can poison your mind and interfere with positive thinking. In our modern world, people tend to forget about the necessity of positive thinking and positive actions; about the necessity of being at least a little bit more optimistic.
Of course, it’s hard to avoid all these worries—just try to think of them less, and therefore make their influence weaker. Remember that positive thinking is the key to happiness and success in life. Be open to it and don’t let unnecessary worries interfere with your well-being.
You’re standing behind the curtain, just about to make your way on stage to face the many faces half-shrouded in darkness in front of you. As you move towards the spotlight, your body starts to feel heavier with each step. A familiar thump echoes throughout your body – your heartbeat has gone off the charts.
Don’t worry, you’re not the only one with glossophobia(also known as speech anxiety or the fear of speaking to large crowds). Sometimes, the anxiety happens long before you even stand on stage.
Your body’s defence mechanism responds by causing a part of your brain to release adrenaline into your blood – the same chemical that gets released as if you were being chased by a lion.
Here’s a step-by-step guide to help you overcome your fear of public speaking:
1. Prepare yourself mentally and physically
According to experts, we’re built to display anxiety and to recognize it in others. If your body and mind are anxious, your audience will notice. Hence, it’s important to prepare yourself before the big show so that you arrive on stage confident, collected and ready.
“Your outside world is a reflection of your inside world. What goes on in the inside, shows on the outside.” – Bob Proctor
Exercising lightly before a presentation helps get your blood circulating and sends oxygen to the brain. Mental exercises, on the other hand, can help calm the mind and nerves. Here are some useful ways to calm your racing heart when you start to feel the butterflies in your stomach:
If you’re nervous, chances are your body will feel the same way. Your body gets tense, your muscles feel tight or you’re breaking in cold sweat. The audience will notice you are nervous.
If you observe that this is exactly what is happening to you minutes before a speech, do a couple of stretches to loosen and relax your body. It’s better to warm up before every speech as it helps to increase the functional potential of the body as a whole. Not only that, it increases muscle efficiency, improves reaction time and your movements.
Here are some exercises to loosen up your body before show time:
Neck and shoulder rolls – This helps relieve upper body muscle tension and pressure as the rolls focus on rotating the head and shoulders, loosening the muscle. Stress and anxiety can make us rigid within this area which can make you feel agitated, especially when standing.
Arm stretches – We often use this part of our muscles during a speech or presentation through our hand gestures and movements. Stretching these muscles can reduce arm fatigue, loosen you up and improve your body language range.
Waist twists – Place your hands on your hips and rotate your waist in a circular motion. This exercise focuses on loosening the abdominal and lower back regions which is essential as it can cause discomfort and pain, further amplifying any anxieties you may experience.
Ever felt parched seconds before speaking? And then coming up on stage sounding raspy and scratchy in front of the audience? This happens because the adrenaline from stage fright causes your mouth to feel dried out.
To prevent all that, it’s essential we stay adequately hydrated before a speech. A sip of water will do the trick. However, do drink in moderation so that you won’t need to go to the bathroom constantly.
Try to avoid sugary beverages and caffeine, since it’s a diuretic – meaning you’ll feel thirstier. It will also amplify your anxiety which prevents you from speaking smoothly.
Meditation is well-known as a powerful tool to calm the mind. ABC’s Dan Harris, co-anchor of Nightline and Good Morning America weekend and author of the book titled10% Happier , recommends that meditation can help individuals to feel significantly calmer, faster.
Meditation is like a workout for your mind. It gives you the strength and focus to filter out the negativity and distractions with words of encouragement, confidence and strength.
Mindfulness meditation, in particular, is a popular method to calm yourself before going up on the big stage. The practice involves sitting comfortably, focusing on your breathing and then bringing your mind’s attention to the present without drifting into concerns about the past or future – which likely includes floundering on stage.
Here’s a nice example of guided meditation before public speaking:
2. Focus on your goal
One thing people with a fear of public speaking have in common is focusing too much on themselves and the possibility of failure.
Do I look funny? What if I can’t remember what to say? Do I look stupid? Will people listen to me? Does anyone care about what I’m talking about?’
Instead of thinking this way, shift your attention to your one true purpose – contributing something of value to your audience.
Decide on the progress you’d like your audience to make after your presentation. Notice their movements and expressions to adapt your speech to ensure that they are having a good time to leave the room as better people.
If your own focus isn’t beneficial and what it should be when you’re speaking, then shift it to what does. This is also key to establishing trust during your presentation as the audience can clearly see that you have their interests at heart.
3. Convert negativity to positivity
There are two sides constantly battling inside of us – one is filled with strength and courage while the other is doubt and insecurities. Which one will you feed?
‘What if I mess up this speech? What if I’m not funny enough? What if I forget what to say?’
It’s no wonder why many of us are uncomfortable giving a presentation. All we do is bring ourselves down before we got a chance to prove ourselves. This is also known as a self-fulfilling prophecy – a belief that comes true because we are acting as if it already is. If you think you’re incompetent, then it will eventually become true.
Motivational coaches tout that positive mantras and affirmations tend to boost your confidents for the moments that matter most. Say to yourself: “I’ll ace this speech and I can do it!”
Take advantage of your adrenaline rush to encourage positive outcome rather than thinking of the negative ‘what ifs’.
Here’s a video of Psychologist Kelly McGonigal who encourages her audience to turn stress into something positive as well as provide methods on how to cope with it:
4. Understand your content
Knowing your content at your fingertips helps reduce your anxiety because there is one less thing to worry about. One way to get there is to practice numerous times before your actual speech.
However, memorizing your script word-for-word is not encouraged. You can end up freezing should you forget something. You’ll also risk sounding unnatural and less approachable.
“No amount of reading or memorizing will make you successful in life. It is the understanding and the application of wise thought that counts.” – Bob Proctor
Many people unconsciously make the mistake of reading from their slides or memorizing their script word-for-word without understanding their content – a definite way to stress themselves out.
Understanding your speech flow and content makes it easier for you to convert ideas and concepts into your own words which you can then clearly explain to others in a conversational manner. Designing your slides to include text prompts is also an easy hack to ensure you get to quickly recall your flow when your mind goes blank.
One way to understand is to memorize the over-arching concepts or ideas in your pitch. It helps you speak more naturally and let your personality shine through. It’s almost like taking your audience on a journey with a few key milestones.
5. Practice makes perfect
Like most people, many of us are not naturally attuned to public speaking. Rarely do individuals walk up to a large audience and present flawlessly without any research and preparation.
In fact, some of the top presenters make it look easy during showtime because they have spent countless hours behind-the-scenes in deep practice. Even great speakers like the late John F. Kennedy would spend months preparing his speech beforehand.
Public speaking, like any other skill, requires practice – whether it be practicing your speech countless of times in front of a mirror or making notes. As the saying goes, practice makes perfect!
6. Be authentic
There’s nothing wrong with feeling stressed before going up to speak in front of an audience.
Many people fear public speaking because they fear others will judge them for showing their true, vulnerable self. However, vulnerability can sometimes help you come across as more authentic and relatable as a speaker.
Drop the pretence of trying to act or speak like someone else and you’ll find that it’s worth the risk. You become more genuine, flexible and spontaneous, which makes it easier to handle unpredictable situations – whether it’s getting tough questions from the crowd or experiencing an unexpected technical difficulty.
To find out your authentic style of speaking is easy. Just pick a topic or issue you are passionate about and discuss this like you normally would with a close family or friend. It is like having a conversation with someone in a personal one-to-one setting. A great way to do this on stage is to select a random audience member(with a hopefully calming face) and speak to a single person at a time during your speech. You’ll find that it’s easier trying to connect to one person at a time than a whole room.
With that said, being comfortable enough to be yourself in front of others may take a little time and some experience, depending how comfortable you are with being yourself in front of others. But once you embrace it, stage fright will not be as intimidating as you initially thought.
Presenters like Barack Obama are a prime example of a genuine and passionate speaker:
7. Post speech evaluation
Last but not the least, if you’ve done public speaking and have been scarred from a bad experience, try seeing it as a lesson learned to improve yourself as a speaker.
Don’t beat yourself up after a presentation
We are the hardest on ourselves and it’s good to be. But when you finish delivering your speech or presentation, give yourself some recognition and a pat on the back.
You managed to finish whatever you had to do and did not give up. You did not let your fears and insecurities get to you. Take a little more pride in your work and believe in yourself.
Improve your next speech
As mentioned before, practice does make perfect. If you want to improve your public speaking skills, try asking someone to film you during a speech or presentation. Afterwards, watch and observe what you can do to improve yourself next time.
Here are some questions you can ask yourself after every speech:
How did I do?
Are there any areas for improvement?
Did I sound or look stressed?
Did I stumble on my words? Why?
Was I saying “um” too often?
How was the flow of the speech?
Write everything you observed down and keep practicing and improving. In time, you’ll be able to better manage your fears of public speaking and appear more confident when it counts.
If you want even more tips about public speaking or delivering a great presentation, check out these articles too: