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10 Things To Do To Be A Superhero For Your Child

10 Things To Do To Be A Superhero For Your Child

Everyone has a role model or a superhero they admire. Some have actors, a sports person or a politician. But the real magic happens when a child says something like, “My dad is my superhero” or “My mom is my superwoman”. Every parent wishes that their child look at them as a good human they admire. But it doesn’t happen over time. They are watching you and modelling you as they grow up. And for them to learn best from your behaviors and actions, do these 10 things:

1. Respect and show love for your partner.

You may not think even once before talking to your spouse but your children are watching you and they will apply the same behaviors when they grow up. If you constantly fight with your spouse, they may think that marriage is a bad thing and always brings trouble. While if you are loving and caring with your spouse, it makes them feel that they should do the same when they grow up.

2. Instill positive values in them.

Values like respect for elders and their peers, helping others in need, and welcoming guests are very important and are being lost in young generations. They are too busy with video games and internet. Show them how these values help them when they grow up and they’ll thank you when they are older.

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3. Let them make small decisions according to their age.

Let them order their food and talk to the waiter; let them decide which subject to study; let them decide which place to go for an outing. By allowing them to make these decisions in their day to day lives, they’ll feel more independent and this will increase their self confidence. Moreover, they’ll learn if they make any wrong decisions.

4. Listen to them.

Listen to them before acting when they complain, when they talk to you or to others, and even when they are not speaking. Their behaviors will also tell you a lot of things. And this listening will help you in making better decisions about their future which will help them.

5. Gift your time. Every day.

Spend some time with them every day. When they don’t get your time, they turn to TV, junk food, unhealthy friendships and toxic behavior. Don’t let this happen to them. Talk to them regularly and tell them it is okay to share any problems they are having.

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6. Involve them in social gatherings.

When you go out in a function, let them stand beside you. Introduce them to other people. Let them see how you meet and talk to people. Let them know what to talk about when you meet people. Don’t keep them home and think that their studies will be disturbed. What they’ll learn in this social environment will be much more important than the bookish knowledge they learn in one hour.

7. Teach them how money works.

Don’t just give them the pocket money. Assign them some work and give them money based on their work done so that they’ll know at a very early age that one has to work to get money. Also tell them to invest a part of the money they get so that they can use it when they need it most.

8. Tell them the importance of following their dreams.

Not everyone follows their dreams because they realize them too late or no one told them when they were young. Don’t take a chance that your children might say this when they are old. Encourage them to dream big, support their ideas and help them in case they need it. This way they’ll get the courage to try new ideas when they really want to.

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9. Encourage them to play indoor/outdoor sports.

Sports teach us a lot. While indoor sports help in developing our mind, outdoor sports teach us leadership, teamwork and keep us physically fit. When your children are actively involved in sports, their physical as well as mental well-being improve dramatically over age.

10. Keep them away from TV/junk food.

Junk food and TV are the most popular relief places when one is stressed or not happy. Do all the above things to keep your children happy. Always eat home-made food and watch less TV. Give them a book or encourage them to do something different.

All these things done daily over years will make your child stand out among the competition these days. And when they excel at whatever they do, they’ll thank you for paving the path when they were young.

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Featured photo credit: child via photopin.com

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Dhaval Gajera

Author and Speaker.

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Last Updated on May 21, 2019

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

Example 1

You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

Example 2

You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

Example 3

You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

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The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

Example 4

You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

  • Understand your own communication style
  • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
  • Communicate with precision and care
  • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

1. Understand Your Communication Style

To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

2. Learn Others Communication Styles

Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

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If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

“How do you prefer to receive information?”

This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

3. Exercise Precision and Care

A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

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In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

“Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

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It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

The Bottom Line

When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

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Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

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