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Meet The Compulsive Liar Who Won’t Stop Lying

Meet The Compulsive Liar Who Won’t Stop Lying

Have you ever met someone who couldn’t stop lying? Maybe you’ve caught them telling small lies, or perhaps it’s something major, but they always seem to be making things up. If they tell enough lies, you might even begin to wonder if they have a serious condition.

Do you ever wonder what it’s like to live with a compulsive liar? Today in the hot seat, we’ve got Jessica, a pathological liar, to tell you all about why she’s constantly betraying others’ trust.

Inside the mind of a compulsive liar

Lifehack: Why do you lie all the time?

Jessica: The funny thing is, sometimes I don’t even know why. There are times when I tell lies because I’m trying to get people to sympathize with me, but sometimes I just make things up to see if I can get away with it. If I want to impress someone, I definitely make things up.

Lifehack: What have you learned from being a compulsive liar?

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Jessica: At first the lies were small, so nothing really bad happened. After a while, the lies grew, and I stopped realizing that I was making things up. I learned that people will believe almost anything if you say it with enough conviction.

At the same time, I learned that I have some issues. My therapist thinks my lying started because of low self-esteem, and we are working to disrupt the lie cycle. Right now, I wanted to tell you that I lie because of past trauma, which is true for some pathological liars, but it’s not the case for me. I’ve never experienced trauma.

Lifehack: Do your friends and family know that you’re a compulsive liar?

Jessica: Absolutely. At first, they tried to play along because they were being polite. As the lies got bigger and more absurd, they started calling me out. My brother actually stopped talking to me because my lies got so out of control.

Lifehack: What has compulsive lying cost you?

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Like I said, my brother doesn’t associate with me anymore. My lying even cost me my marriage. Plus, everyone knows that I have this problem, so my reputation is ruined.

Lifehack: What are some ways that you might lie in an average day?

Jessica: I’m always tempted to lie when I meet new people. It’s easier to deceive strangers who aren’t aware of my history. I definitely lie about my job. I work at a bookstore, but I’ll tell people that I’m a lawyer sometimes. I read a lot novels about law, so I just pull from that.

I also tend to exaggerate when I want to get out of things. Once I had a cold and I don’t want to go into work, so I told my boss I was hospitalized for a bad case of pneumonia.

Lifehack: What’s the worst thing that’s happened because of a lie you told?

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Jessica: My very worst lie is the one that cost me my marriage. My ex and I were arguing a lot. It wasn’t because of my lying–we were just having a rough time. I decided to tell him that I was pregnant even though I wasn’t. I went as far as to steal a sonogram picture from my friend to pass off as my own.

This news made my husband happy, and it temporarily alleviated our problems. Everyone in our families got excited about it.

That lie obviously has a shelf life. When it got to the point where I should have been showing, I decided that I’d have to “miscarry” in order to save face. I waited until he went to work, faked a trip to the hospital, and had to break the news to him. I was so upset about what I had done, but everyone thought I was just sad because I lost the baby.

Eventually he figured out that I made the whole thing up, and he filed for divorce.

Lifehack: Do you have any way to control your lying?

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Jessica: Sometimes I believe the stories I make up, or the lies happen before I even think about them. I’m working to get it under control, but I don’t know if I’ll ever stop.

Lifehack: How does it make you feel when you lie?

Jessica: It’s complicated. I feel excited when I manage to successfully deceive someone into thinking I’m better than I am. I also know that some lies that I tell are so over-the-top and so damaging, that I usually end up regretting them later.

Don’t believe everything you hear

Most of us fib on occasion, but some people take lying to a new level. Compulsive liars seem to derive some satisfaction from what they do, but they also tear lives apart and leave their own in shambles.

Featured photo credit: Photo by Louis Blythe on Unsplash via unsplash.com

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Anna Chui

Anna is a communication expert and a life enthusiast. She's the editor of Lifehack and loves to write about love, life, and passion.

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.

Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.

So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.

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1. Listen

Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

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“What makes you so excited about it?”

“How long has that been your dream?”

You need this information the help you with the following steps.

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3. Encourage

This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”

4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be

After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.

5. Dream

This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.

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6. Ask How You Can Help

Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.

7. Follow Up

Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.

Final Thoughts

By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …

Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!

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Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com

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