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The One Trick That Will Make You Become More Confident When Facing Challenges

The One Trick That Will Make You Become More Confident When Facing Challenges

You desperately want to be promoted at work, but there’s a problem… you lack the self confidence to push yourself ahead.

Year after year you watch your colleagues move up the ladder, while you languish at the bottom. It’s not that chances don’t come your way – it’s just that you never take them when they do. Sadly, as time goes by, your self-confidence plummets to new lows, and your original career dreams lay dead in the water.

If this (or something similar) has happened to you, then it’s time to realize that…

Self Confidence – The Basis of Success

If you take an impartial look at your colleagues, friends and family members, you’ll discover that the most successful people are not always the most intelligent!

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That’s right. Intelligence is certainly a component of success, but it’s not the be all and end all. In fact, it’s fair to say that confidence is more vital to success than intelligence or skill.

If you don’t believe this, then spend some time studying TV and film actors. Sure, there are many talented actors who are at the top of their game. You see them in all the latest blockbusters. But look a little further at the supporting actors. Some of these are good – but some are (quite frankly) pitiful! I used to wonder how these second-rate actors got regular work, until I realized that they may not be great actors, but they do possess an abundance of self-confidence. In many cases, this self-confidence appears to have landed roles to these inferior actors – while leaving more talented actors in the wings.

Success and confidence go hand in hand. One of the reasons for this, is that confident people are not easily defeated by challenges and obstacles. Instead of falling at the first hurdle, they seek ways to overcome problems.

Would you like to have more success in your life? I’m sure you do. So, let’s turn now to a practical way of boosting your self-confidence.

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The Internal Confidence Boost That You Can Do Anytime Anywhere

From your home to the global arena, challenges are everywhere. You must be resilient and resourceful if you want to overcome these relentless challenges.

One way to do this, is to take some time to study a major personal challenge. Specifically, write down all the possible excuses you may have now (or in the future) of why you cannot defeat this challenge. Once you have this list, the next step is to write down a counter argument to each point. The second stage will be the part you primarily focus on, as you build your self-confidence to overcome the challenge.

Putting The Confidence Boost in Practice

To understand this further, I’m going to give you an entertaining example.

The challenge is this: You want to ask a potential partner to go out with you on a first date. Whatever your age and experience, asking someone out on a date is bound to be stressful and nerve-racking. In your head, you’re likely to have these questions going around and around… “Do they like me?” “Will they turn me down?” “Will they laugh at me?!”

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If you allow your mind to have a constant repetition of negative thoughts, it’s likely that you’ll lose your confidence and willingness to ask the person out on a date. Don’t let this happen. Instead, make a list of reasons why you don’t feel up to asking the question.

These could be things like:

  • He/she may already have a partner.
  • They probably don’t fancy me.
  • I doubt I’m in their league!

Now, create your counter argument list:

  • They may be single and open to a relationship.
  • They have been flirting with you, so there’s a decent chance they find you attractive.
  • They may be thinking the same thing as you… “Am I out of their league?!”

The above scenario can easily reach a conclusion if you’re willing to build up enough confidence to ask the other person out. If they say no, then you’ll be no worse off than if you didn’t ask them. And if they say yes – then enjoy your date!

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It Applies to All Scenarios, Not Limited to Interpersonal Interaction

Another significant challenge many people face, is financial worries. You may have credit card debts, or you’re behind with your mortgage (or both!). Again, make a list of what’s stopping you tackling the problem, and then write a supplementary list with reasons why you should and will take control of the situation.

Once you’ve got negativity and inaction out the way, take decisive steps to overcome your challenges. The more times you find yourself on the winning side, the more your self-confidence will be boosted. And remember, self-confidence is an essential component of success.

More by this author

Craig J Todd

Freelance Writer helping businesses and people to thrive.

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Last Updated on April 1, 2019

How to Be Happy: Why Pursuing Happiness Will Make You Unhappy

How to Be Happy: Why Pursuing Happiness Will Make You Unhappy

When we talk about happiness, we often think about staying happy all the time – every single day, every single minute with zero negativity. Many try to pursue this constant state of “happiness” as their ultimate goal, and avoid anything that may take it away from them.

But, what is the meaning of this type of “happiness”?

It’s a lot like your favorite food. The more often you have it isn’t always better. On the contrary, when you only have a chance to eat it sparingly, that’s when you really savor every bite. So is it the food itself that makes you happy, or is it how valuable it is to you when you are eating it?

Always remember that only by experiencing sadness do we understand what it is to be happy.

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Video Summary

Don’t Assume Others Are Always Happy

Most people see those who have seemingly perfect lives and assume they are happy all the time. Since childhood, we are conditioned to chase the idea of “happily-ever-after” that we see in fairytales. On social media, everyone tends to share only the best looking aspects of their lives. So, it’s very easy to have a distorted view of what “happiness” is around us.

In reality, there is always something missing, something lacking, or something unpleasant.

No one has a perfect life. Even the most glamorous celebrities or the richest billionaires have their own set of challenges and problems.

When we feel negative, we’re only focusing on a small fluctuating curve. As CEO of Lifehack, I’ve had to deal with countless problems, and some of them felt like real setbacks at the time. During those moments, it really seemed like these problems would be the life or death of my company and my life goals. But, I got through them; and, weeks, months and eventually years passed with many more ups and downs.

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You need to keep your sights on the extended curve.  Looking back now, a lot of those “really big” problems at the time now seem like only small blips in a long line of experiences. Recalling them in my mind now makes me smile!

Stop Trying to Be Happy–Just Be

It’s natural to want to be happy as often as possible.

So what can we do?

First, throw away the belief that a perfect life means happiness. Personally, I would be miserable if everything was perfect. It’s through experiencing the pains of lifelong challenges that drives us to care for others when they are experiencing similar trials. If life was perfect, you wouldn’t be able to empathize. If life was perfect, you wouldn’t grow.

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To be truly happy, stop chasing permanent happiness.

It sounds like a paradox. But, what I mean is to accept that there will be ups and downs throughout life. Gracefully understand that happiness is a fluctuation of positive and negative events.

Understand the importance of gratitude. Instead of focusing on the unpleasant moment, flash back your memory to when you didn’t have something. I like to think about my career, for example. When I didn’t have a career I was passionate about, I felt lost and demotivated. I felt like everyone was figuring out their lives but me. But, when I found my purpose and started Lifehack, I was deeply happy, even before I realized I would be successful! This memory keeps me going when I hit tough spots. It takes the darkness to make us grateful for the light.

Happiness and Sadness Exist Together

What it all comes down to is this: your life will be filled with beautiful, happy and incredible moments–happy tears and joyous shouts and funny stories. But, your life will also be filled with rain and storms that never seem like they will pass while you’re going through them.

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But, whether your face is warmed by the sunshine, or your heart is dampened by the rain, know that it’s all part of the ebb and flow of life.

Treasure the happy moments and power through the sad ones. Don’t try to avoid “sad” or “negative” experiences, and blindly chase being “happy”. In the end you will achieve a true level of contentment in your life, based on meaningful experiences and achievements. Being able to create growth and meaning out of both positive and negative events — that is the true meaning of “happiness”.

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