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Every Family Has Its Problems, This Is How Some Stick Together No Matter What

Every Family Has Its Problems, This Is How Some Stick Together No Matter What

Families are meant to be there with you through thick and thin. They are supposed to pick you up when you fall down, nudge you to the right direction when you are lost and misguided and correct you when you are mistaken and short-sighted but what happens when you are in a war with the ones you called family? Do you go your separate ways or do you make it work?

Before we make any hasty decisions and come to the conclusion, let’s analyze what a family conflict is.[1]

Family conflict is a struggle or discord among the members of a family, whether it is between the parents or parent and child or between siblings. It is caused due to many reasons. It might be caused by financial problems; when we can’t pay bills. The other reasons might be a rivalry between the siblings, due to different sets of beliefs and viewpoints and poor communication in the family.

Whatever the causes and reasons, family conflicts take away a sense of security and belongings from a person and if not resolved, it will result in breaking of the family or even criminal activities at worst.

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Let’s go in depth about the different types of family conflicts.[2]

1. Parental Conflict

It occurs when a husband and his wife are in constant disagreement with each other. This creates a hostile environment, which will ultimately harm socializing aspects of the child as a child coming from a high conflict background can’t socialize with his/her counterparts and is more prone to have a conflict with others. This usually results in the divorce of husband and wife.

2. Parent-child Conflict

It occurs when the parents don’t agree with the viewpoint of children or vice-versa. It is primarily caused due to generation gaps and controlling behavior of certain family members. It leads to the separation of a child from family.

3. Sibling Conflict

It occurs among the children of a family and may result in breaking of the family.

So, what shall we do when there is conflict between the family members? Shall we quit, give up on each other and stop being families? Or we work towards resolving whatever the issue that is causing the conflict?

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If you want to resolve a family conflict, then you should know about family counseling.

Family counseling falls under the Family Act, it helps families with relationship problems and manages the issues concerning the family and children during marriage, divorce, and separation. It may also be about the grave feelings, living arrangements, financial issues, and issues regarding children.

Family counselors are trained individuals, who help people solve emotional issues with their family and reach agreement in the case of disagreements.[3] He/she will listen to our problems and help us find effective solutions.

People should go to family counseling whenever there is a source of discontent and disharmony in family or whenever the family is faced with important issues as a unit. It can be after or before or during a marriage, separation, divorce, remarriage or death of a family member. The other scenario might be a case if any of the family members is suffering from physical or mental health problems.

Some of the signs to look for in case you need family counseling are listed below.

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  • Communication breakdown in a family
  • Withdrawal of family members from family events
  • Extreme reactions to little problems
  • Violence upon oneself or family members
  • Change of behavior
  • Substance abuse problems in family

These are telltale signs, if you find above signs, then it’s time to take family counseling.[4]

Even after a separation or divorce, family counseling is still necessary.

Whenever we separate with our partners with some irreconcilable differences, we shouldn’t forget that the separation doesn’t only affect us, they affect the children as well. Therefore, if we seek family counseling, it will help address the needs of children and provide children with the stability they need to flourish in life.

The divorce rate in USA is about 40 to 50 percent among the married couple, which is even more in their subsequent marriage. Homeless and runaway youth primarily identify family conflict as the main reason behind their decision to walk away from their family.[5] Most of these could be avoided if we were willing to see the family counsellors and work to mend our relationships.

For instance, take a case of Jacqueline Mary Ray and Tom Selleck.[6] They were the power couple of Hollywood, however, they split because Tom was obsessed with the role in the series Magnum P.I. This could have been avoided if the couple would have given family counseling a try. In many other notable cases, celebrity couple like Kristen Bell and Dax Shepard, Jessica Simpson and Eric Johnson, Kim Kardashian and Kanye West went to family counseling, which resolved their family conflict and helped them remain as a family even amidst the conflict.

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Remember when we have a conflict in the family next time that blood is thicker than the water and any conflict can be resolved with the help of family counseling.

Featured photo credit: Pexels via static.pexels.com

Reference

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Nabin Paudyal

Co-Founder, Siplikan Media Group

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Published on October 30, 2020

11 Essential Philosophy Books That Will Open Your Mind

11 Essential Philosophy Books That Will Open Your Mind

There are numerous ways to build your mindset, but none are as profound as reading philosophy books. Through these books, some of the greatest minds around ask questions and delve deep into thought.

While there isn’t always a clear and distinct answer to the many questions of philosophy, the entire field is a gateway to a higher sense of self. It gets you to think about all manner of things.

Below, we cover some of the essential philosophy books that are best for those who are just starting or looking to expand their mind.

How To Choose a Good Philosophy Book

Before getting to this list, we’ve researched ideal philosophy books to help you expand your mind.

We’ve found that the best philosophy books excel in the following criteria:

  • Complexity – Philosophy isn’t a subject that you can’t dive into immediately and understand everything. The books that we selected are great for people making the first leap.
  • Viewpoint – With philosophy, in particular, the author’s views are more important than in your standard book. We want to ensure the viewpoints and thoughts being discussed still hold up to this day.
  • Open-mindedness – Philosophy is all about asking perplexing questions and unraveling the answer. You might not reach a conclusion in the end, but these books are designed to get you to think.
  • Culture – The last criterion is culture. A lot of these books come from early philosophers from centuries ago or possibly from recent years. These philosophy books should paint a picture of the culture.

1. Meditations

    One that you’ll find on many of these types of lists is Meditations and for good reason. It’s the only document of its kind to ever be made. The book focuses on the private thoughts of the world’s most powerful man who advises himself revolving around making good on his responsibilities and the obligations of his position.

    We know enough about Marcus Aurelius to know that he was trained in stoic philosophy and practiced every night on a series of spirituality exercises. These exercises were designed to make him humble, patient, empathetic, generous, and strong in the face of whatever problem he had to face off. And he faced plenty of problems since he was basically the emperor of roughly a third of the planet.

    All of that is poured into this book, and you are bound to remember a line or more that will be applicable in your life. It’s a philosophy book staple.

    Buy Meditations here.

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    2. Letters From a Stoic

      Similar to Marcus Aurelius, Seneca was another powerful man in Rome. He was a brilliant writer at the time and was the kind of guy to give great advice to his most trusted friends. Fortunately, much of his advice comes in letters, and those letters happen to be in this book. The letters themselves provided advice on dealing with grief, wealth, poverty, success, failure, education, and more.

      While Seneca was a stoic, he has a more practical approach and has borrowed from other schools of thought for his advice. As he said when he was alive, “I don’t care about the author if the line is good.” Similar to Meditations, there are several brilliant lines and advice that are still relevant to this day.

      Buy “Letters From a Stoic” here.

      3. Nicomachean Ethics

        Aristotle was a famous Greek philosopher at the time with profound knowledge. He’s named after a form of logic as well called Aristotelian logic. Through this book, Aristotle writes about the root of all Aristotelian ethics. In other words, this book contains the moral ideas that form a base for pretty much all of western civilization.

        Buy “Nicomachean Ethics” here.

        4. Beyond Good & Evil

          Friedrich Nietzsche played a big role in the philosophical world. He was one of the leading philosophers of the existential movement, and it all came through this particular book. He is a brilliant mind. However, the issue with a lot of his work is that it’s all written in German.

          Fortunately, this book is one of the slightly more accessible ones since it’s translated. Within the book, he breaks down the paradoxes of conventional understandings of morality. By doing this, he sets the stage for a lot of the 20th-century thought process that followed.

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          Buy “Beyond Good & Evil” here.

          5. Meditations on First Philosophy

            In Meditations on First Philosophy, René Descartes breaks his book down into six meditations. The book takes a journalistic style that is structured much like a six-day course of meditation. On day one, he gives instructions on discarding all belief in things that are not guaranteed. After that, he tries to establish what can be known for sure. Similar to Meditations, this is a staple and influential philosophical text that you can pick up.

            Buy “Meditations on First Philosophy” here.

            6. Ethics

              Written by Benedict de Spinoza, this came at a time during the Age of Enlightenment. Enlightenment was a movement that dominated the world of ideas in Europe during the 17th and 18th centuries and with that, many schools of thought emerged and were presented through books.

              Out of the many influential philosophy books published back then, Ethics dominated during this period as it discussed the basis of rationalism. Even though we’ve developed further beyond that, Ethics can introduce new ways of thinking from this particular school of thought.

              Buy “Ethics” here.

              7. Critique of Pure Reason

                Immanuel Kant is another great philosopher who brought together two of history’s biggest opposing schools of thought into a single book. Those schools being rational thought and empirical experiential knowledge—knowledge gained through experience.

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                In Critique of Pure Reason, Kant explores human reason and then works to establish its illusions and get down to core constituents. Overall, you can learn more about human behavior and thought processes and thus, open your mind more to how you think and process everything around you.

                Buy “Critique of Pure Reason” here.

                8. On the Genealogy of Morals

                  Another piece of work from Nietzsche that is accessible to us is On the Genealogy of Morals. According to Nietzsche, the purpose of this book is to call attention to his previous writings. That said, it does more than that so you don’t need to worry so much about reading his other books.

                  In this book, he expands on the cryptic aphorisms that he brings up in Beyond Good and Evil and offers a discussion or morality in a work that is more accessible than a lot of his previous work.

                  Buy “On the Genealogy of Morals” here.

                  9. Everything Is F*cked

                    The only book on this list that’s been written in the past few years, this book by Mark Manson aims to explain why we all need hope while also accepting that hope can often lead us to ruin too.

                    While many of the books on this list are all practical, this one is the most realistic one since not even the greatest of philosophical minds could predict things like technology, Twitter, and how our political world has shaped.

                    Manson delivers a profound book that taps into the minds of our ancestral philosophers, such as Plato, Nietzsche, and Tom Waits, and digs deep into various topics and how all of it is connected—religion and politics, our relationship with money, entertainment, and the internet.

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                    Overall, this book serves as a challenge to all of us—a challenge to be more honest with ourselves and connect with the world in a way we’ve never tried before.

                    Buy “Everything Is F*cked” here.

                    10. Reasons and Persons

                      One of the most challenging philosophy books to read on this list, Reasons and Persons will send you on quite the trip. Through a lot of painstaking logic, Derek Parfit shows us some unique perspectives on self-interest, personhood, and whether our actions are good or evil.

                      Considered by many to be an important psychological text around the 20th century, the arguments made about those topics will open your mind to a brand new way of thinking.

                      Buy “Reasons and Persons” here.

                      11. The Republic of Plato

                        Written by Plato himself, this book is the origin of political science and offers a brilliant critique of government. As you would expect, the critique is still important today. If you’re looking to understand the inner thoughts of Plato, this is one of the best books around.

                        Buy “The Republic of Plato” here.

                        Final Thoughts

                        Philosophy books take a while to digest as they provide profound knowledge and leave you with many questions. With many of these philosophy books, you need to take your time with them, and you might have to read through them a few times as well. And with every read, your mind will only expand.

                        More Books to Open Your Mind

                        Featured photo credit: Laura Chouette via unsplash.com

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