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Can Time Really Heal Us or Not?

Can Time Really Heal Us or Not?
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It is very hard to experience heartbreak. It feels like the pain will never end, even though everyone around you is telling you that you will move on.

Break-ups are difficult for everyone involved, whether it was a mutual breakup or a one-sided break-up. The pain can feel almost physical, and the idea of living a normal day-to-day life can feel impossible. Your instincts may be telling you to hide from the pain with a distraction, but in reality, it is best to experience the roller-coaster of emotions that your body is feeling.

At the time the pain will seem intense, and many people will tell you that time is the best healer. But is this actually true? Will time heal your pain?

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The truth is that time will heal your broken heart, but how long this will take varies between people. Everyone has their own individual reaction to rejection and heartbreak, and these reactions will also be shaped by the length of the relationship, your age, and how emotionally involved you were with the other person.

So time will heal you, but in the meantime, you can also do some things to help heal yourself.

Here are seven ways to heal yourself quickly so that you can start letting go.

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Be In A Relationship With Your Best Friends

Your best friends love and care for you in a way that is similar to a romantic relationship – just without the romance! This is why you should spend as much time as you can focusing on the positive, loving relationships you have with your best friends, instead of thinking about your negative previous romantic relationship.

Remember that your friends fulfill you in a way that a partner never will. Travel with your friends, invite them out for dinner dates and spend the night on the couch with them watching TV – you may even find that you end up having more fun with them than you would have with your ex.

Remember That Rejection Is A Part Of Life

No-one likes being rejected, but sadly it happens to most people at some point in their life. This is because life is filled with soaring highs and crashing lows, and while the lows are difficult at the time they will make you stronger emotionally.

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Focus On Having A Positive Mind-Set

Be open to new experiences and ideas, and make an effort to try new things that you’ve always been interested. Who knows – you could end up preferring yoga to your last relationship!

Know That Grief Is Not A Choice

You have gone through a difficult break-up and you have lost something that was very important to you, so grief is completely natural. Many people try to control their grief, but grief is not a choice and it will control you. This may feel unpleasant, but the best thing that you can do is bravely battle through the pain that you feel. Acknowledge the hurt, and then let it pass.

Remember That The Majority Of Relationships End

Whether it is due to a break-up or a divorce, lots of relationships will end. This is why you shouldn’t ever feel inadequate after a break-up. Even the most interesting, loving, funny and beautiful people go through rejection, heartbreak and loss.

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Work On Loving Yourself

One of the hardest things about a break-up is feeling like you are incomplete without the other person. If you can relate to this, remember that you don’t need someone else to complete you if you love yourself enough. Take some time to learn more about yourself and what you love so that you can be happy without a partner.

Spend Time With People Who Support You

Spending time with people who love and support you for who you are will help to ease the pain of the break-up. They will remind you that many people do support you, and this will motivate you to move on through your heartbreak.

More by this author

Amy Johnson

Amy is a writer who blogs about relationships and lifestyle advice.

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Last Updated on February 11, 2021

20 Amazing Facts About Dreams that You Might Not Know About

20 Amazing Facts About Dreams that You Might Not Know About
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Dreams — Mysterious, bewildering, eye-opening and sometimes a nightmarish living hell. Dreams are all that and much more.

Here are 20 amazing facts about dreams that you might have never heard about:

Fact #1: You can’t read while dreaming, or tell the time

    If you are unsure whether you are dreaming or not, try reading something. The vast majority of people are incapable of reading in their dreams.

    The same goes for clocks: each time you look at a clock it will tell a different time and the hands on the clock won’t appear to be moving as reported by lucid dreamers.

    Fact #2: Lucid dreaming

    There is a whole subculture of people practicing what is called lucid or conscious dreaming. Using various techniques, these people have supposedly learned to assume control of their dreams and do amazing things like flying, passing through walls, and traveling to different dimensions or even back in time.

    Want to learn how to control your dreams? You can try these tips:

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    Lucid Dreaming: This Is How You Can Control Your Dreams

    Fact #3: Inventions inspired by dreams

    Dreams are responsible for many of the greatest inventions of mankind. A few examples include:

    • The idea for Google -Larry Page
    • Alternating current generator -Tesla
    • DNA’s double helix spiral form -James Watson
    • The sewing machine -Elias Howe
    • Periodic table -Dimitri Mendeleyev

    …and many, many more.

    Fact #4: Premonition dreams

    There are some astounding cases where people actually dreamt about things which happened to them later, in the exact same ways they dreamed about.

    You could say they got a glimpse of the future, or it might have just been coincidence. The fact remains that this is some seriously interesting and bizarre phenomena. Some of the most famous premonition dreams include:

    • Abraham Lincoln dreamt of His Assassination
    • Many of the victims of 9/11 had dreams warning them about the catastrophe
    • Mark Twain’s dream of his brother’s demise
    • 19 verified precognitive dreams about the Titanic catastrophe

    Fact #5: Sleep paralysis

    Hell is real and it is called sleep paralysis. It’s the stuff of true nightmares. I’ve been a sleep paralysis sufferer as a kid and I can attest to how truly horrible it is.

    Two characteristics of sleep paralysis are the inability to move (hence paralysis) and a sense of an extremely evil presence in the room with you. It doesn’t feel like a dream, but 100% real. Studies show that during an attack, sleep paralysis sufferers show an overwhelming amygdala activity. The amygdala is responsible for the “fight or flight” instinct and the emotions of fear, terror and anxiety. Enough said!

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    Fact #6: REM sleep disorder

    In the state of REM (rapid-eye-movement) stage of your sleep your body is normally paralyzed. In rare cases, however, people act out their dreams. These have resulted in broken arms, legs, broken furniture, and in at least one reported case, a house burnt down.

    Fact #7: Sexual dreams

    The very scientifically-named “nocturnal penile tumescence” is a very well documented phenomena. In laymen’s term, it simply means that you get a stiffy while you sleep. Actually, studies indicate that men get up to 20 erections per dream.

    Fact #8: Unbelievable sleepwalkers

      Sleepwalking is a very rare and potentially dangerous sleep disorder. It is an extreme form of REM sleep disorder, and these people don’t just act out their dreams, but go on real adventures at night.

      Lee Hadwin is a nurse by profession, but in his dreams he is an artist. Literally. He “sleepdraws” gorgeous portraits, of which he has no recollection afterwards. Strange sleepwalking “adventures” include:

      • A woman having sex with strangers while sleepwalking
      • A man who drove 22 miles and killed his cousin while sleepwalking
      • A sleepwalker who walked out of the window from the third floor, and barely survived

      Fact #9: Dream drug

      There are actually people who like dreaming and dreams so much that they never want to wake up. They want to continue on dreaming even during the day, so they take an illegal and extremely potent hallucinogenic drug called Dimethyltryptamine. It is actually only an isolated and synthetic form of the chemical our brains produce naturally during dreaming.

      Fact #10 Dream-catcher

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        The dream-catcher is one of the most well-known Native American symbols. It is a loose web or webs woven around a hoop and decorated with sacred objects meant to protect against nightmares.

        Fact #11: Increased brain activity

        You would associate sleeping with peace and quiet, but actually our brains are more active during sleep than during the day.

        Fact #12: Creativity and dreams

        As we mentioned before, dreams are responsible for inventions, great artworks and are generally just incredibly interesting. They are also “recharging” our creativity.

        Scientists also say that keeping a dream diary helps with creativity.

        In rare cases of REM disorder, people actually don’t dream at all. These people suffer from significantly decreased creativity and perform badly at tasks requiring creative problem solving.

        Fact #13: Pets dream too

          Our animal companions dream as well. Watch a dog or a cat sleep and you can see that they are moving their paws and making noises like they were chasing something. Go get ’em buddy!

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          Fact #14: You always dream—you just don’t remember it

          Many people claim that they don’t dream at all, but that’s not true: we all dream, but up to 60% of people don’t remember their dreams at all.

          Fact #15: Blind people dream too

          Blind people who were not born blind see images in their dreams but people who were born blind don’t see anything at all. They still dream, and their dreams are just as intense and interesting, but they involve the other senses beside sight.

          Fact #16: In your dreams, you only see faces that you already know

            It is proven that in dreams, we can only see faces that we have seen in real life before. So beware: that scary-looking old lady next to you on the bus might as well be in your next nightmare.

            Fact #17: Dreams tend to be negative

            Surprisingly, dreams are more often negative than positive. The three most widely reported emotions felt during dreaming are anger, sadness and fear.

            Fact #18: Multiple dreams per night

            You can have up to seven different dreams per night depending on how many REM cycles you have. We only dream during the REM period of sleep, and the average person dreams one to two hours every night.

            Fact #19: Gender differences

            Interestingly, 70% of all the characters in a man’s dream are other men, but women’s dream contain an equal amount of women and men. Also men’s dreams contain a lot more aggression. Both women and men dream about sexual themes equally often.

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            Fact #20: Not everyone dreams in color

            As much as 12% of people only dream in black and white.

            Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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