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See What Over 2000 Reddit Users Says About “What’s The Saddest Thing You Ever Done To Fit In?”

See What Over 2000 Reddit Users Says About “What’s The Saddest Thing You Ever Done To Fit In?”

When was your last time to do something you don’t like just to fit in the environment? I remember I had a time when I first entered university and was afraid to be unable to make friends. What I did was to join several cultural nights where I drank cans of beer when I actually hate beer. It was terrible.

We have all been there. We all have tried to change ourselves just to fit in the crowd, out of social insecurity.

You are not alone.

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A question was raised in Reedit about “What’s the saddest, lamest thing you’ve ever done to ‘fit in’?” and it went viral in receiving over 2000 replies in a day.

The following replies are chosen among the ones with more comments.

“Paid them to like me. : Found out later, they thought what I was doing was sad. One girl told me that I didn’t need to spend money on buying them food and stuff because I was already their friend.” -Nixconvie

Some people use money as a temptation to buy what they want. In a relationship which requires love and care, materials do not always work. Do you really think buying a person gifts can exchange for a true friendship? All you will get is a ‘thank you’, and nothing much.

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Sending presents is a way to show care but doing it to make people like you is not persuasive. True friendships are based on the quality time you spent together, mutual trust, and being companions in difficult times. They are more spiritual and emotional, and the happiness cannot be bought. Instead of fulfilling their materialistic needs, spend more time on knowing each other and creating mutual memories.

“When I was around 12 years old I was bullied. At one point I thought my bullies would stop bullying me if I joined them. So one day they started bullying this other kid, this was one of the nicest kids in class. After a few minutes, I saw the tears in his eyes and realized that I’ve been in his position daily, and I stopped on the spot. I felt like a jerk, and get ashamed when I think about it.”-racoon1969

Bullying is common in schools and society where people take sides to join the majority against the few left ones. Like what mentioned above, some people try to avoid being bullied by joining the bullies when they know it is wrong. Hurting others makes you feel bad because you are apparently unwilling to. Especially when you were once the victim, you understand how it feels and you feel guilty when others are hurt in the same case.

Don’t be afraid to leave people who hold friendship with power. The relationship is never healthy when one follows what others do out of fear. If you think it’s not right, it’s fine to follow your heart. Trust me, you don’t want such a friend and you don’t want more victims.

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“Begged my mom to buy me etnies (the skateboarding shoes) when I was 10. She finally did but I broke down crying and begged her to take them back once I learned they were $40.” – fgsixtynine

Preferences on clothing style and taste vary frequently in lifetime. If the friendship is simply bonded by a symbol or a product, it is pretty much vulnerable. When things change from time to time, what is treasurable is the solidity in a relationship because it’s built upon people but not objects.

“I stopped hanging out with one of my best friends as much because all the other kids found him annoying.”– LieutenantCuppycake

How do you define “friends”? Do those you met in a social event and never spoke ever again count? When we grow older, we know it is not easy to find true friends. Sometimes we meet fancy people in gatherings but what is left afterwards is a “morning” or a “bye”. It is valuable when we receive an invitation message to dinner because we know somebody treats us as real friends.

Appreciate it if you have a friend like this, even if some others don’t like her. We don’t make friends to cater others. How you feel about the person and what’s in your friendship is all you should care. Remember, never give up on genuine people because they are rare to find in the world.

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“I started smoking in high school because all the “cool kids” smoked during lunch breaks… I was so desperate to fit in and prove that I’m cool as well.” -eukaRIOTa

Peer influence us a lot by making ourselves believe that we need to always follow the trend and be as ‘cool’ as the others. People who want to fit in the group sometimes follow their peer without taking note of the negative consequences. If your friend asks you to try drugs with him/her, will you follow or stop him/her?

A healthy relationship should be built on positive influence to one another. We hope to receive advice from friends at hard times and we motivate them as encouragement. Good friends are the ones who show support and make your life better.

In times we might think we need to fit in so as to be liked. Indeed, the right people will come and love you just the way you are. It’s alright if you don’t get along with some groups because nobody fits everybody. Keep going and be yourself and the right things will come to you.

Featured photo credit: Lovely Professional University via happenings.lpu.in

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Brandy Chan

Music Lover. Movie Lover. Traveller.

Admit It, The Way We Learn To Fall In Love Is Wrong 100 Inspirational Quotes That Will Make You Love Life Again See What Over 2000 Reddit Users Says About “What’s The Saddest Thing You Ever Done To Fit In?” These Ideas Are Categorised As “What Seems Awesome Until You Tried it”, by Over 1000 Reddit Users Around The World

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Last Updated on June 19, 2019

6 Ways to Be a Successful Risk Taker and Take More Chances

6 Ways to Be a Successful Risk Taker and Take More Chances

I’ve stood on the edge of my own personal cliffs many times. Each time I jumped, something different happened. There were risks that started off great, but eventually faded. There were risks that left me falling until I hit the ground. There were risks that started slow, but built into massive successes.

Every risk is different, but every risk is the same. You need to have some fundamentals ready before you jump, but not too many.

It wouldn’t be a risk if you knew everything that was about to happen, would it? Here’re 6 ways to be a successful risk taker.

1. Understand That Failure Is Going to Happen a Lot

It’s part of life. Everything we do has failure attached to it. All successful people have stories of massive failure attached to them. Thinking that your risk is going to be pain free and run as smooth as silk is insane.

Expect some pain and failure. Actually, expect a lot of it. Expect the sleepless nights with crazy thoughts of insecurity that leave you trembling under the covers. It’s going to happen, no matter how positive you are about the risk you are about to take.

When failure hits, the only options are to keep going or quit. If you expect falling into a meadow of flowers and frolicking unicorns, then you’re going to immediately quit once you realize that getting to that meadow requires you to go through a rock filled cave filled with hungry bats.

2. Trust the Muse

Writing a story isn’t a big risk. It’s really just a risk on my time. So when I start writing a story, I’m scared it will be time wasted. Of course, it never really is. Even if the story doesn’t turn out fabulous, I still practiced.

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When I’ve taken risks in my life, the successful ones always seemed to happen when I followed the muse. Steven Pressfield describes the muse,

“The Muse demands depth. Shallow does not work for her. If we’re seeking her help, we can’t stay in the kiddie end. When we work, we have to go hard and go deep.”

The muse is a goddess who wants our attention and wants us to work on our passion.

If you’re taking a risk in anything, it’s assumed that there is some passion built up behind that risk. That passion, deep inside you, is the muse. Trust it, focus on it, listen to it.

The most successful articles and stories I write are the ones I’ve focused all my attention on. There were no interruptions during their creative development. I didn’t check my phone or go watch my Twitter feed. I was fully engaged in my work.

Trust the muse, focus your attention on your risk, let the ideas and path develop themselves, and leave the distractions at the side of the road.

3. Remember to Be Authentic

Taking a risk and then turning into something you’re not, is only going to lead to disaster. Whether you are risking a new relationship or new opportunity, you must be yourself throughout the entire process.

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How many times have you acted like you loved something just because the men or woman you just started going out with loved it?

For example, I’m not an office worker. I have an incredibly hard time working in a confined timeline (ie. 9-5). That’s why I write. I can do it whenever the mood strikes, I don’t have somebody breathing down my neck, telling me that I’m five minutes late, or missed a comma somewhere. I don’t have to walk on eggshells wondering if what I’m writing will get me fired or make me lose a promotion. I can just be myself, period.

One girlfriend didn’t understand that. She believed solely in the 9-5 motto, specifically something in human resources because that was a very stable job. I was scared for my future, but I stuck with the relationship because of my own insecurities and acted like I would do it to make her happy.

Here’s a tip: NEVER take away from your happiness to make somebody else satisfied (note I didn’t say happy).

Making somebody else happy will make you happy. Doing something to satisfy somebody is murder on your soul.

4. Don’t Take Any Risks While You’re Not Clearheaded

I’d been considering the risk for a couple weeks. It all sounded good. I was 22 and I could be rich in a couple of years. That’s what they were selling me, anyways.

One night, while at a house party with some friends, I found myself at a computer. A couple of my friends were standing nearby and asked me what I was doing. I told them I was considering starting my own business and it was only going to cost me $1,500.

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Of course, when a bunch of drunk people are surrounded by more drunk people, things get enthusiastic. It sounded like the best business venture in the world to everybody, including me. So I signed up and gave them my credit card number.

A few painful months and close to $4,000 dollars lost later, I quit the business. I was young and fell into the pyramid scheme trap. It was an expensive drunk decision.

Drinking heavily and making decisions has a proven track record of failure. So when you have something important to decide, don’t let your emotions take over your brain.

5. Fully Understand What You’re Risking

It was the start of my baseball comeback. I got a tryout with a professional scout and killed it. After the tryout, he talked to my girlfriend and myself, making sure we understood I would be gone for up to 6 months at a time. That strain on the relationship could be tough.

We understood. I left to play ball, chose to stay in the city I played in, and a year later we broke up. Not because of baseball, see point 3 above. Taking big risks can have massive impacts on everything in your life from relationships to money. Know what you’re risking before you take the risk.

If you believe the risk will be worth it or you have the support you need from your family, then go ahead and make the leap.

You can get more guidance on how to take calculated risks from this article: How to Take Calculated Risk to Achieve More and Become Successful

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6. Remember This Is Your One Shot Only

As far as we know officially, this is our one shot at life, so why not take some risks?

The top thing people are saddened by on their deathbeds are these regrets. They wish they did more, asked that girl in the coffee shop out, spoke out when they should have, or did what they were passionate about.

Don’t regret. Learn and experience. Live. Take the risks you believe in. Be yourself and make the world a better place.

Now go ahead, take that risk and be successful at it!

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Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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