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This Quality Of Your Man Can Predict Whether Your Marriage Will Last Or Not

This Quality Of Your Man Can Predict Whether Your Marriage Will Last Or Not

If you’re looking for something serious and don’t want to contribute to divorce statistics, besides all those boxes that you’d like to tick about your future husband, this is one that you should pay especial attention to. That is if you want to be a little more sure about your husband than you are buying your avocados.

If you’re looking for a long-term partner, you need to look for someone who’s used to long-term devotion and endurance in different areas of life, not just romantic love. When approximately half of American marriages end up in divorce, in our culture of instant gratification, that’s no surprise.According to recent studies, the passion and determination to pursue long-term goals is a powerful predictor of whether someone will drop out in the tough times of a relationship or succeed to live through the stormy phases. What some researchers call “the grit effect” is not only a variable to retention in marriage, but also in the military, workplace sales, and high school.[1]

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Those who show grit, are more likely to succeed in marriage and other areas of life.

Those who experience frustration, doubt and confusion not as a sign that it’s time to quit, but are just natural phases of a learning process, are much more likely to maintain loyalty to their goals. This is why lifetime educational attainment is correlated with grit, and inversely with lifetime career changes and divorce.[2]

Perceiving frustration as a natural part of a learning process is a healthy trait.

In the same way, people who are grittier tend to regard problems as challenges, rather than feeling frustrated and worn out by the stress of battling the problem, and they tend to be more proactive in the pursuit of a solution.[3]

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Interestingly, having this characterising of being able to teeth-gritting through the tough times seems to pay off, as demonstrated in a study by the Marriage Foundation. In this study, 7 out of 10 of the unhappy parents who manage to stay together reported to be happy 10 years on after the storm; 27% of these reported being “extremely happy.”[4]

Pays off to stay together through the tough times.

So if you’re considering whether your boyfriend is husband material or not, you might want to look at his past and see if there’s a pattern of keeping a devotion to his long-term goals, or if there’s a pattern of constant quitting. That will give you a good idea of whether he’ll have what it takes to survive through the rough times or if he’s likely to drop out.

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You can never be too sure of how life will turn out and how much you and your partner will change with it. But when the years start to pass, responsibilities start to weigh and every day starts to look the same, that’s when being with a strong, gritty man, and being a gritty woman yourself, will play a significant role in the success or failure of your marriage.

You can’t predict the future, but personality can tell you a lot.

If you’re both devoted and passionate people who have been resisting tough times and persevering on the pursuit of your goals, chances are you’re going to live happily ever after.

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Do you have grit? Do you believe your significant other is gritty as well? Are there other qualities other than grit you feel determines the success of a relationship?

Reference

More by this author

Ana Sofia Batista

Psychologist | Mentor | Writer | Yoga Teacher

This Quality Of Your Man Can Predict Whether Your Marriage Will Last Or Not Want To Break The Ice And Get Close To Someone Quickly? Try This Communication Hack If You Understand This Psychological Rule, You Can Motivate Yourself More Effectively

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Last Updated on December 2, 2018

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

When giving a presentation or speech, you have to engage your audience effectively in order to truly get your point across. Unlike a written editorial or newsletter, your speech is fleeting; once you’ve said everything you set out to say, you don’t get a second chance to have your voice heard in that specific arena.

You need to make sure your audience hangs on to every word you say, from your introduction to your wrap-up. You can do so by:

1. Connecting them with each other

Picture your typical rock concert. What’s the first thing the singer says to the crowd after jumping out on stage? “Hello (insert city name here)!” Just acknowledging that he’s coherent enough to know where he is is enough for the audience to go wild and get into the show.

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It makes each individual feel as if they’re a part of something bigger. The same goes for any public speaking event. When an audience hears, “You’re all here because you care deeply about wildlife preservation,” it gives them a sense that they’re not just there to listen, but they’re there to connect with the like-minded people all around them.

2. Connect with their emotions

Speakers always try to get their audience emotionally involved in whatever topic they’re discussing. There are a variety of ways in which to do this, such as using statistics, stories, pictures or videos that really show the importance of the topic at hand.

For example, showing pictures of the aftermath of an accident related to drunk driving will certainly send a specific message to an audience of teenagers and young adults. While doing so might be emotionally nerve-racking to the crowd, it may be necessary to get your point across and engage them fully.

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3. Keep going back to the beginning

Revisit your theme throughout your presentation. Although you should give your audience the credit they deserve and know that they can follow along, linking back to your initial thesis can act as a subconscious reminder of why what you’re currently telling them is important.

On the other hand, if you simply mention your theme or the point of your speech at the beginning and never mention it again, it gives your audience the impression that it’s not really that important.

4. Link to your audience’s motivation

After you’ve acknowledged your audience’s common interests in being present, discuss their motivation for being there. Be specific. Using the previous example, if your audience clearly cares about wildlife preservation, discuss what can be done to help save endangered species’ from extinction.

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Don’t just give them cold, hard facts; use the facts to make a point that they can use to better themselves or the world in some way.

5. Entertain them

While not all speeches or presentations are meant to be entertaining in a comedic way, audiences will become thoroughly engaged in anecdotes that relate to the overall theme of the speech. We discussed appealing to emotions, and that’s exactly what a speaker sets out to do when he tells a story from his past or that of a well-known historical figure.

Speakers usually tell more than one story in order to show that the first one they told isn’t simply an anomaly, and that whatever outcome they’re attempting to prove will consistently reoccur, given certain circumstances.

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6. Appeal to loyalty

Just like the musician mentioning the town he’s playing in will get the audience ready to rock, speakers need to appeal to their audience’s loyalty to their country, company, product or cause. Show them how important it is that they’re present and listening to your speech by making your words hit home to each individual.

In doing so, the members of your audience will feel as if you’re speaking directly to them while you’re addressing the entire crowd.

7. Tell them the benefits of the presentation

Early on in your presentation, you should tell your audience exactly what they’ll learn, and exactly how they’ll learn it. Don’t expect them to listen if they don’t have clear-cut information to listen for. On the other hand, if they know what to listen for, they’ll be more apt to stay engaged throughout your entire presentation so they don’t miss anything.

Featured photo credit: Flickr via farm4.staticflickr.com

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