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Looking For Genuine Happiness? Then You Should Adopt This Mindset

Looking For Genuine Happiness? Then You Should Adopt This Mindset

For some, this world is a disappointing place. People don’t come through for us. Institutions, businesses, politicians, and product peddlers frequently over-promise and under-deliver. Happiness seems to be a mirage. A wispy dream that dances in front of you but remains just beyond your fingertips. You expect one thing but constantly receive another…

And therein lies the problem. Your expectations dictate your level of happiness.

Your sense of entitlement fuels your expectations

Our expectations determine how happy we ultimately are.

Surprises— whether it be a birthday party, a gift, a visit, or just a small act of kindness— are so special and impactful for one fundamental reason: they are unexpected. It is hard to be disappointed by the random and unanticipated. You are not tied to the experience prior to it materializing. You accept it as is and are open, uninhibited, and your mind is untainted by your own preconceived notions. You are able to experience and then judge based on what actually occurred–not what you imagined.

So how do you curtail and manage your expectations?

You must first address and deal with your own sense of entitlement. Everyone, to some degree, believes they are owed something. The truth is neither the world, life, or God owes you anything. Period. We are not entitled to good health, wealth, success, material possessions, or even love. The ugly, naked reality is that when we enter this world, we are a blank canvas. We are all equal. We are dealt a specific set of circumstances and must respond accordingly.

Gratitude is the remedy for the entitled mindset. Genuine happiness comes with the realization that every good experience is a gift and every unsavory experience is an opportunity. And being grateful for both.

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Denise Hill

Denise shares about psychology and communication tips on Lifehack.

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Last Updated on June 26, 2020

10 Things To Remember When Everything Goes Wrong

10 Things To Remember When Everything Goes Wrong

Problems and heartaches in life are inevitable. However, there are some things to remember when you’re right in the thick of it that can help you get through it. When everything seems to be going wrong, practice telling yourself these things.

1. This Too Shall Pass

Sometimes life’s rough patches feel like they’re going to last forever. Whether you’re dealing with work-related issues, family problems, or stressful situations, very few problems last for a lifetime. So remind yourself, that things won’t be this bad forever.

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2. Some Things are Going Right

When things are going wrong, it’s hard to recognize what is going right. It’s easy to screen out the good things and only focus on the bad things. Remind yourself that some things are going right. Purposely look for the positive, even if it is something very small.

3. I Have Some Control

One of the most most important things to remember is that you have some control of the situation. Even if you aren’t in complete control of the situation, one thing you can always control is your attitude and reaction. Focus on managing what is within your control.

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4. I Can Ask for Help

Asking for help can be hard sometimes. However, it’s one of the best ways to deal with tough situations. Tell people what you need specifically if they offer to help. Don’t be afraid to call on friends and family and ask them for help, whether you need financial assistance, emotional support, or practical help.

5. Much of This Won’t Matter in a Few Years

Most of the problems we worry about today won’t actually matter five years from now. Remind yourself that whatever is going wrong now is only a small percentage of your actual life. Even if you’re dealing with a major problem, like a loved one’s illness, remember that a lot of good things are likely to happen in the course of a year or two as well.

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6. I Can Handle This

A lack of confidence in handling tough times can add to stress. One of the best things to remember is that you can handle tough situations. Even though you might feel angry, hurt, disappointed, or sad, it won’t kill you. You can get through it.

7. Something Good Will Come Out of This

No matter how bad a situation is, it’s almost certain that something good will come out of it. At the very least, it’s likely that you will learn a life lesson. Perhaps you learn not to repeat the same mistake in the future or maybe you move on from a bad situation and find something better. Look for the one good thing that can result when bad things happen.

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8. I Can Accept What’s Out of my Control

There are many things that aren’t within your control. You can’t change the past, another person’s behavior, or a loved one’s health issues. Don’t waste time trying to force others to change or trying to make things be different if it isn’t within your control. Investing time and energy into trying to things you can’t will cause you to feel helpless and exhausted. Acceptance is one of the best way to establish resilience.

9. I Have Overcome Past Difficulties

One of the things to remember when you’re facing difficulties, is that you’ve handled problems in the past. Don’t overlook past difficulties that you’ve dealt with successfully. Remind yourself of all the past problems you’ve overcome and you’ll gain confidence in dealing with the current issues.

10. I Need to Take Care of Myself

When everything seems to be going wrong, take care of yourself. Get plenty of rest, get some exercise, eat healthy, and spend some time doing leisure activities. When you’re taking better care of yourself you’ll be better equipped to deal with your problems.

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Featured photo credit: NeONBRAND via unsplash.com

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