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5 Things You Must Do If You’re Moving From Japan To The US

5 Things You Must Do If You’re Moving From Japan To The US

The time comes when you have to live your dreams. When you have to do those things you’ve always thought mattered most to you. While leaving your comfort zone and moving to a location you’ve never lived in is a difficult decision to make, it is the best decision for you if it is necessary for you to live your dreams. In your new location, you will begin a life you’ve never had and meet and relate to people you don’t know.

Sometimes, moving to a new location doesn’t mean that you don’t like your current location or that you’re not productive where you are. It may just be a dream you’ve always had that you must fulfil. Your reasons for wanting to relocate may include exploring the world, sharing the experiences of other people, eating their food, visiting their most beautiful places, or getting a job in a new location that you could never get in your hometown. Whatever reason you have, you can never achieve it if you aren’t determined.

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Moving from Japan to the United States could be one of the worst decisions ever if you aren’t prepared. Some people might make this decision overnight and simply hope for the best. But, if you desire to relocate from Japan to the United States, careful planning is necessary to make the best of your decision and give you the best chance to live your dream life.

These 5 carefully outlined tips will help you make your plans.

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1. Decide You’re Really Moving

Do you really want to move? Every successful journey starts with a single but difficult decision. Sometimes, after the excitement of the moment passes, you may let your plans elude you if you aren’t determined to push through with your decision. A lot of people desire to move from Japan to the United States but have no concrete reason for doing so that will keep them going past the moment of excitement and push them through the long haul. Deciding to move is a personal choice and is different for every person. For someone who is new in his or her job or early in a marriage, this may be a very easy choice to make. However, it would be a very difficult choice for someone who is later in their career path or has a family and more connections to their current location. Whichever condition you are in, moving is never a completely bad decision to make, but in the latter situation, you will need to spend a long time planning and preparing, and only a strong will can push you through.

2. Find Temporary Accommodations

It’s the desire of everyone relocating to the US to find a comfortable place of residence. However, it’s never a good decision to hope to find the best home before you’ve moved to the US, because this may cost you more than you could imagine. However comfortable you are in Japan, keep it in mind that your early life in the US may be entirely different. Lifestyles, houses, and accommodations in the US are entirely different from what you’ve known and what you’ve experienced in Japan or in other locations. It’s best to look for temporary accommodations in the US when you’re just moving in and then look for someplace better when you’re fully settled.

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3. Move Your Luggage

Have you done an international move before? If your answer is yes, then you should know how much time, effort and money these moves demand. There are different means of moving your luggage from Japan to the US, and if you aren’t careful, you may not find the one that is best for you. It’s best to seek as much information as you can and explore all available options before making a choice.

Moving your luggage and/or furniture is one of the toughest things to do, especially when moving abroad. To help this process run smoothly, it’s necessary to make the best choice from among the available moving options. You may require the services of a moving company, but ensure you find the best possible company to hire. It’s important to seek the opinions of those who’ve used the moving service before, or to at least make a smart choice based on your budget, the mover’s price offer, and the company’s level of experience.

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You need to identify an international mover that offers exactly the services you are looking for at a price you can afford. This is entirely your choice, and you have nearly unlimited options depending on the service level you’re looking for.

4. Make Friends

This may be a little difficult, but you have to do it quickly to get along in the US. People from other countries often complain how difficult it is to make friends with Americans, but from my understanding, the difficulty doesn’t come from the Americans but from ourselves. If it’s easy to make friends with people from your native country, what makes the difference? Well, naturally, we like people who share similar characteristics with us, and we feel a lot more comfortable with them and feel a sense of mutual understanding with such people. Still, two things I’ve discovered about people who find it difficult to make friends with Americans are 1. They believe that Americans are entirely different people from themselves, and 2. Their fear of rejection. You must overcome that belief and that fear and build in yourself a higher sense of self-worth and attractiveness.

Yes! Americans are different people, and they speak, behave and relate differently compared to people from other cultures. However, they remain the friendliest people you can find. If you can focus on the similarities you share as humans and make an effort to learn their ways fast, you’ll carry along easily. It is your attitude that will either attract you to any person on earth or repel you from them. On the other hand, focusing on the differences between your way of life and that of the Americans you meet will only repel you from them, and instead of blaming yourself, you may be tempted to blame them. Overcome your fear of rejection, notice more of the similarities between you instead of the differences, learn to believe that you’re special and that anyone would love to be your friend, and be ready to learn new ways of life. This will help you make friends more easily than you could imagine.

5. Live Your Dreams

There’s nothing more to living well than living the life you desired. Live and explore your new location. Those beautiful moments you had in your dreams of being in America, visiting the most beautiful places, having fun and making your life worthwhile- bring them to reality now. The world belongs to you, and you have lots of the best choices to make, so make them and live your life.

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MICHAEL LILY

Writer/entrepreneural development specialist

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Last Updated on February 18, 2019

13 Tips to Face Your Fears, Grow with It and Enjoy the Ride

13 Tips to Face Your Fears, Grow with It and Enjoy the Ride

Fear. I spend my life talking about fear — fighting fears, fixing fears and understanding fears. And yet I doubt I get 10 calls a year from people saying “Mandie can you help me fix my fear?”

Why is this so critically important to you?

The realization for me is that fear is not the fundamental driving force in your life it’s what regardless of whether I’m talking to a doctor, a teacher, a CEO’s, a senior citizens or teenager – every single one of those conversations has a direct correlation with your world.

Fear can range from the overwhelming desire to look away or stop in your tracks to literally fleeing your country and the life you knew. In this article, I will share you with 13 tips to face your fears and enjoy the ride.

1. Know That Fear Is Real, but Can Be Overcome

Right now around the world people are facing fear — real fear. Fear that I pray my children and I will never experience. Does that lessen my fears or your fears in your relativity safe 21st century life?

When I look at the world we all live in, I find that fear like so many other emotions can mean so many different things to so many different people:

  • The child who has to be physically dragged to their first day of school.
  • The man facing the judge.
  • The woman with her hand poised over the buttons over her phone because she has to walk down a dark corridor late at night alone.
  • The man as the surgeon says “count backwards from 10 Mr Smith.”
  • The woman that’s told “We are sorry, we can’t help you.”
  • The man that faces the empty circle of a gun and prays for his very existence.

These and a million more (Portrayed in every kind of movie, book or song you could imagine) are what make us human. We face fear and somehow move forward or are stopped in our tracks.

Like the rabbit in the headlights of the car that veers off through the field away from the tyres of the car or stays still praying for salvation. Like someone will save them. Sound familiar?

Fear is huge. Fear is everywhere and yet fear can be overcome, controlled and can even be a power for good.

2. Accept Your Fear

Firstly if you aren’t facing the barrel of the gun, atrocities that make the news or impeding death, that’s a good start. However it doesn’t mean your fear is any less real.

We are quick to say “I can’t moan, my life is not as bad as X.” While in theory, that’s honorable your appreciation of Mr. or Mrs. X’s horrific life won’t change anything directly. So accept your fear is relative to you.

And here’s what can be done.

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3. Get Some Perspective

I found myself asking anyone that would answer “what is your worst fear”. The answer that intrigued me the most came from my daughter (15 years old and she usually has a copy of Fight the Fear – my book – in her school bag so she can help someone else be as positive and confident as her. No matter what life throws up.)

And her fear, surprised me — heights. I pointed out that we live in a sprawling bungalow (one storey) and the highest she goes is two storeys’ at school! She laughed but added, fear isn’t like that Mum. I know it’s not a real fear, but it’s like when you stand on a chair and feel unsafe.

That girl will go far. Because she truly gets fear.

We know something is scary and yet we still do it. Why? Because we have a perspective to the fear. When you lose perspective, it can feel too big, and too scary.

So look around you to get some perspective on your fear:

  • Are you really at risk?
  • Will this kill you?
  • Which leads us on to..
  • If the worse was to happen what would it be?

4. Hold a Hand

As a coach, it is my job to holds someone’s metaphorical hand and help them face a fear.

Like the child petrified of the thunder storm or the teen that can’t get back in a car again after failing their test, your job as a parent is to reassure, encourage, enable and motivate someone to face something that ideally they never would choose to again.

We know many of our fears aren’t real. However, it is only when someone guides us with love, respect, lack of judgement and safety are we able to get through fear. And trust me, you can get through your fears. I’ve seen it so many times.

Ask yourself:

  • If the worse were to happen, what would that be?
  • Could that really happen?
  • If the worse did happen, how would you recover?
  • If the worse were to happen, what would you need to do next?

By seeing fear as not the end destination but part of being human, you can see through it’s wily evil ways and move forward.

5. Know Whose Hand You Hold Either Physically or Emotionally

This helps with fears for the rest of your life.

Think of someone you can always rely on (and ideally you won’t just answer yourself because that adds a lot of pressure to your existence!) And you will find that you’ve already found a way to get through fear.

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The beauty of this is that it means that fear becomes part of life not something to be feared and shied away from.

It means you know you can turn to your friend, partner, colleague, parent, sibling and say “Right I need to deal with this, and I’m going to need you to help me.”

For one moment, think about it from the other person’s view point. When we get to help other people we feel valued, loved, respected and lots of other positive emotions and we get a good dose of positive chemicals setting off in our bodies too.

Your fear, and your determination to fight it, helped someone else too. Now that’s cool right?

6. Understand That There Are Some Things Fear Will Never Touch

I like to find role models in life — people who have faced heroism, history changing moments, war, atrocities, miracles, life saving inventions.

Not everyone was looking for greatness, however they all found it. And one of my favourite books to date is written about Alistair Urquhart, the forgotten highlander. If this doesn’t get turned into a film in the future, then no man’s story is likely to.

Alistair went through the most horrific experiences in the 2nd world war. If you think of one of the awful things that happened back then in our world, Alistair went through at least 3 of them! Asked afterwards how did you cope? He talked about how whatever they did to his body, no matter how they starved, tortured, threatened or mocked him, they couldn’t have his mind. In his mind he was free.

Of all the people’s voices I’ve heard in my head over the years, this is one of those statements that reminds me anything is possible if you have faith and hope.

Look for the things in life that fear can’t touch. They will create confidence and faith for the future, whatever you face. And they will give you a sense of why being you is awesome.

Of all the billions of people on this planet, no one will have an answer identical to yours!

7. Process Your Fears to Carry on with Life

Being brave is not about sticking your chest out and smiling regardless of what hell you endure. It is about finding a way to emotionally process your fears to be able to keep going.

I have a tool kit of things I can rely on – tools, strategies, techniques. They include people to hug or talk to, music. hobbies, walks on the beach and even my favourite food. It sounds mad but at the times where I have questioned “how will I get through this?” I’ve found immense joy in doing the most unlikely of thing that makes me smile.

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It may be a short lived moment of happiness. However, it reminded that nothing stays the same and I can find away.

One client told me that it was crazy when it felt like their world was falling around their ears to run a bath to the brim (you don’t waste water) get the best bath oils, light too many candles, lock the door and drink a glass of bubbly (champagne is only for special occasions.)

Did that moment fix the disaster that my clients life felt? No, however it gave them a moment of calm and the brain is far quicker to find solutions, resolve and motivation to keep going when you do that.

It may feel like madness to do something you love, however it can be a powerful way to help you find solutions to the fears you face in life.

8. Assume the Worse

If you read the statement from the client above. Notice how they assumed it was wrong to fill the bath up to the top? How bubbly is only for special occasions?

Think how naughty they felt to be doing something that was not allowed?

  • Think about what age it may have made them feel?
  • Think about how they feel about champagne?
  • What special moments it’s been a part of in their lives?

And you can see how the assumptions they made about their “right” to have these things was not healthy.

When I drag the assumptions out of people’s words for them to see, they are often struck by how negative the words make them feel.

Don’t assume your words aren’t impacting on you. You can go through fear and actually enjoy the ride when you take the time to understand how you are letting words get to you.

9. Take a Fear That Feels Insurmountable Right Now.

If you were to repeat it to me out loud, what would you say?

Would you have blame on yourself in there? Would you assume others can do it and it’s just you? Would you feel small, unsuccessful, useless, unworthy?

Usually, when you do this exercise, you are able to spot the untruths that run wild in your head convincing you that you are doomed. And rarely when we are faced with our assumptions is there is a lot of evidence to them.

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10. You Are Not Defined by Your Fear

One fear does not define your life – be mindful of that. It is likely to lead you to thinking of all the times you’ve succeeded and bring a moment of calm, confidence and faith back to you.

11. Go with Fear

When you learn to go with fear, you could find yourself actually having fun, no seriously – having fun.

I have a few amazing clients I’m working with right now who would describe themselves as life long worriers, or pessimists. In the past that has served them well, enabling them to keep safe, steer clear of risks and even develop strategies in the event of disasters. However, now they find it’s becoming hard to break the cycle and they really want to because it’s holding them back.

Notice how they’ve found their hidden fears and want to face them?

One client said “I knew this was going to be tough, and I knew I couldn’t fight it alone and I knew you would be the one to help me.” Before I sat an incredibly successful, confident, capable business owner with a family and a social life to die for.

However, I’ve learned that the most successful looking lives can hide things that impact on life, success, love, happiness and business.

We didn’t start with the fear that they felt was holding them back, we broke the fear down, and found lots of little obstacles that had been deemed as “life” and “unchangeable” and “that’s just the way it is” by developing awareness to the little steps on the road to their obstacles to happiness and success they were able to tackle them in a different way.

12. Discover Great Skills in Your Scary Moments

And in that clients words “I came here to work with you to grow my company, and my own personal skills. I didn’t expect to get the children to be cleaning up after themselves and my partner being more attentive! It all feels a little magic.”

The moral is that out of the scariest of moments, we can find great skills we didn’t know we had. Find better, healthier, happier ways to live and find ways to enjoy life more. (And have a bit of magic!)

What a great place to be in ready for the next fear that thinks it’s going to get in the way of you, right?

13. Own Your Fear

Think back over these tips and come up with at least one example for each one. Write them down. Put them on your phone. Turn them into a piece of art. Turn them into a poem. Frame them. Go for a fast walk across the fields, beach, down town and repeat these things in your head to the sound of your feet on the ground.

We rarely take the time to appreciate how far we have come, how much we can achieve or what we are capable of – by really owning the tips in this article you will have given your brain a big fat dose of “Damn right I can do this!” and the motivation and accountability to say “Let’s find a way” through any fear.

You can’t help but feel good when you see that can you? And fear doesn’t stand a chance, does it?

More Resources About Fighting Fear

Featured photo credit: Ben White via unsplash.com

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