Advertising
Advertising

The Lessons Chess Can Teach Your Children

The Lessons Chess Can Teach Your Children

Chess is one of the oldest, still-played games in the world. Developed in northern India in the 500s A.D., chess has been internationally popular for centuries. Every day, chess players around the world match wits in this complex battle of strategy and tactics.

Chess is not just a game, however. It can also be a tool. Teaching your child how to play it can aid in his or her intellectual and personal development in several ways. Here are just a few of the lessons that chess can teach your child.

How to think logically and strategically

Most people have to think strategically in the course of their daily lives. That might involve choosing how to best handle a case or client you’ve been assigned at work, mapping out the best route to and from work in the case of bad weather or traffic, or what to buy at the grocery store in order to get the most products for your dollar. All of these situations, from the most urgent and important to the most mundane, require some level of strategic thinking: pinning down the facts and analyzing how to act on the basis of that information.

Advertising

Children aren’t usually put into these kinds of situations, or at least not until they become old enough to be deemed ready for them. How will they develop the strategic minds they’ll need for the future? Many children’s games already feature quite a bit of strategy, but teaching them how to play chess certainly can’t hurt.

Chess was originally developed as a war game called chaturanga (“four divisions”) in Sanskrit. At the time, the pieces represented various kinds of military units, but even in its current form, the war connotations that chess holds are still obvious. Players must move their pieces around the board, attack and take enemy pieces, and defend their own pieces.

By learning how to play chess, children can better develop their strategic and analytical thinking skills. As they get more used to the game, they will learn which decisions are best to make in certain situations, and even how to predict their opponent’s thought processes and moves. Such developed skills make playing chess a valuable educational tool for your kids’ educational achievements as well as in their everyday life.

Advertising

The importance of competition

Competition is an unquestionable fact of life. People compete over test scores, over college spots, over jobs, and over recognition. Children who understand the importance of competition and winning tend to be more successful in life than those who don’t. While putting too much pressure on your children to win or be the best at everything they do can have a negative effect, your child should still understand, for the sake of his or her future success that competition exists in life and that it’s important for him or her to do his/her absolute best and to improve himself/herself constantly.

Some children are naturally competitive, whether in academics or sports. If your child is not, however, teaching him or her how to play chess can help light that spark within him/her.

Competition is the most essential part of chess – the entire game is a mental battle between two opponents. When a child begins to learn chess and starts playing games, he’ll/she’ll probably lose a lot in the beginning (unless he/she is a prodigy). You should encourage him/her to keep trying. By playing on a regular basis, he/she might start winning and experiencing the rewards of being successfully competitive.

Advertising

While a game of chess is usually very civil, competition lies at its core, and there’s hardly a better game out there to instill the competitive spirit in your child.

When to accept a loss and how to learn from it

Chess is a game of tactics, of strategy, and above all of reality. When your strategy fails and your opponent breaks through your defenses and your only remaining possible course of action involves taking your king and fleeing down the board to try to get out of multiple checks, you know you’re almost certainly beaten.

While there’s a lot to be said for the trait of persistence, it’s also important to know when you’ve been beaten. Everyone who’s lost a chess game has taken that truth to heart.

Advertising

Most children haven’t been exposed to the realities of adulthood, and as such they are often infinitely optimistic, even in the face of insurmountable obstacles.  However, they will eventually grow up and see the world for what it is, recognizing the fact that even despite their best efforts, things won’t always turn out the way they like. Losing at chess is a great way for children to learn this important lesson.

There is a brighter side to this depressing aspect of chess, however. Every loss at chess also teaches us how to improve upon our mistakes and achieve a better result the next time around. Once the chessboard is cleared off and the pieces are set back up, we can turn our losses to our advantage in the next game by using the lessons we’ve learned from them.

It’s just the same in life: every failure should be looked upon as a learning experience. Everybody fails at something and at some point in their lives; even kids who are great students and athletes aren’t guaranteed to continue winning forever. Children need to learn how to pick themselves up after a loss and, more importantly, how to learn from that loss, and chess is a good method to instill that lesson in them.

Teaching your children how to play this complex and challenging game is a great way to bond with them and help them sharpen their minds. However, don’t forget that chess is, after all, a game, and that above all else it should be fun for your kids.

Featured photo credit: pixabay via cdn.pixabay.com

More by this author

6 Ways to Beat The Stress Hormone The Lessons Chess Can Teach Your Children Natural Ways to Treat Acid Reflux Neutralize Your Body pH With the Right Foods Eat and Drink Your Way to Feeling More Energetic

Trending in Child Development

1 Want Your Kids To Be Happy For A Lifetime? Make Them Feel Secure In The Early Days 2 Necessary Steps When Teaching Your Teenager to Drive 3 5 Tips For Teaching Money Management To Children 4 7 Effective Tips for Your Child’s Positive Growth 5 5 Ways to Ease Back to Work Without Nanny Anxiety

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Published on December 14, 2018

14 Helpful Tips for Single Parents: How to Stay Sane While Doing it All

14 Helpful Tips for Single Parents: How to Stay Sane While Doing it All

According to the U.S. Census Bureau, over 27% of children under the age of 18 are living with a single parent.[1] That’s over 1/4th of the U.S. population.There is a common misconception that children who grow up in single parent homes are not as successful as children living in two-parent homes.

One crucial detail that was often left out of studies when comparing single and two-parent homes was the stability of the household. There is a correlation between family structure and family stability, but this study shows that children who grow up in stable single-parent homes do as well as those in married households in terms of academic abilities and behavior.

But providing stability is easier said than done. With only one adult to act as a parent, some tasks are inherently more challenging. However, there are a few helpful things you can do to make the parenting journey a little easier for yourself and stay sane while doing it.

1. Don’t Neglect Self-Care

Before anything else can be done, you must be caring for your own needs adequately. Only when you are feeling well-rested and healthy can you be at your best for your children.

Many parents tend to put their kids’ needs first and their owns last, but that will result in a never-ending cycle of exhaustion and feelings of inadequacy. Make time to eat regularly and healthfully, get plenty of rest, and squeeze in exercise whenever you can. Even a short walk around the neighborhood will help your body get much-needed movement and fresh air.

Your children depend on you, and it’s up to you to make sure that you are well-equipped and ready to take on that responsibility.

2. Join Forces with Other Single Parents

At times, it may seem like you’re the only person who knows what it’s like to be a single parent. However, the statistics say that there are many others who know exactly what you’re going through.

Find single parents locally, through your kid’s school, extracurricular activities, or even an app. There are also numerous online communities that can offer support and advice, through Facebook or sites like Single Mom Nation.

Although single moms make up the majority of single parents, there are more than 2.6 million single dads in the U.S. A great way to connect is through Meetup. Other single parents will more than happy to arrange babysitting swaps, playdates, and carpools.

Join forces in order to form mutually beneficial relationships.

Advertising

3. Build a Community

In addition to finding support with other single parents, also build a community comprised of families of all different types. Rather than focus solely on the single parent aspect of your identity, look for parents and kids who share other things in common.

Join a playgroup, get plugged in at a church, or get to know the parents of the kids involved in the same extracurricular activities. Having a community of a variety of people and families will bring diversity and excitement into your and your kids’ lives.

4. Accept Help

Don’t try to be a superhero and do it all yourself. There are probably people in your life who care about you and your kids and want to help you. Let them know what types of things would be most appreciated, whether it’s bringing meals once a week, helping with rides to school, or giving you time to yourself.

There is no shame in asking for help and accepting assistance from loved ones. You will not be perceived as weak or incompetent. You are being a good parent by being resourceful and allowing others to give you a much-needed break.

5. Get Creative with Childcare

Raising a child on a single income is a challenge, with the high cost of daycares, nannies, and other conventional childcare services. More affordable options are possible if you go a less traditional route.

If you have space and live in a college town, offer a college student housing in exchange for regular childcare. Or swap kids with other single parents so that your kids have friends to play with while the parents get time to themselves.

When I was younger, my parents had a group of five family friends, and all of the children would rotate to a different house each day of the week, during the summer months. The kids would have a great time playing with each other, and the parents’ job becomes a lot easier. That’s what you would call a win-win situation.

6. Plan Ahead for Emergencies

As a single parent, a backup plan or two is a must in emergency situations. Make a list of people you know you can call in a moment’s notice. There will be times in which you need help, and it’s important to know ahead of time who you can rely on.

Look into whether or not your area offers emergency babysitting services or a drop-in daycare. Knowing who will be able to care for your child in the event of an emergency can relieve one potential source of anxiety in stressful situations.

7. Create a Routine

Routines are crucial for young children because knowing what to expect gives them a semblance of control. This is even more important when in a single parent home.

Advertising

If the child travels between homes or has multiple caretakers, life can seem extremely chaotic and unpredictable. Establish a routine and schedule for your child as much as possible. This can include bedtime, before/after school, chores, meal times, and even a weekend routine.

Having a routine does not mean things cannot change. It is merely a default schedule to fall back on when no additional events or activities are going on. When your children know what to expect, they will be less resistant because they know what to expect, and days will run much more smoothly.

8. Be Consistent with Rules and Discipline

If your child has multiple caretakers, such as another parent, grandparent, or babysitter, communicate clearly on how discipline will be handled. Talk to your ex, if you are sharing custody, as well as any other caretakers about the rules and the agreed-upon approach to discipline.

When a child realizes that certain rules can be bent with certain people, he/she will use it to their advantage, causing additional issues with limits, behavior, and discipline down the road.

This article may help you to discipline your child better:

How to Discipline a Child (The Complete Guide for Different Ages)

9. Stay Positive

Everyone has heard the saying, “Mind over matter.” But there really is so much power behind your mentality. It can change your perspective and make a difficult situation so much better.

Your kids will be able to detect even the smallest shift in your attitude. When the responsibilities of motherhood are overwhelming, stay focused on the positive things in your life, such as your friends and family. This will produce a much more stable home environment.

Maintain your sense of humor and don’t be afraid to be silly. Look towards the future and the great things that are still to come for you and your family. Rediscover and redefine your family values.

10. Move Past the Guilt

In a single parent home, it is impossible to act as both parents, regardless of how hard you try. Let go of the things that you cannot do as a single parent, and instead, think of the great things you ARE able to provide for your children.

Advertising

Leave behind the notion that life would be easier or better with two parents. This is simply not true. There is a multitude of pros and cons to all family dynamics, and the one you are providing for your kids now is the one that they need.

Don’t get bogged down by guilt or regret. Take control of your life and be the best parent you can by being present and engaged with them on a daily basis.

11. Answer Questions Honestly

Your kids may have questions about why their home situation is different from many of their friends. When asked, don’t sugarcoat the situation or give them an answer that is not accurate.

Depending on their age, take this opportunity to explain the truth of what happened and how the current circumstances came about. Not all families have two parents, whether that is due to divorce, death, or whatever else life brings.

Don’t give more detail than necessary or talk badly about the other parent. But strive to be truthful and honest. Your children will benefit more from your candor than a made-up story.

12. Treat Kids Like Kids

In the absence of a partner, it can be tempting to rely on your children for comfort, companionship, or sympathy. But your kids are not equipped to play this role for you.

There are many details within an adult relationship that children are not able to understand or process, and it will only cause confusion and resentment.

Do not take out your anger on your kids. Separate your emotional needs from your role as a mother. If you find yourself depending on your kids too much, look for adult friends or family members that you can talk to about your issues.

13. Find Role Models

Find positive role models of the opposite sex for your child. It’s crucial that your child does not form negative associations with an entire gender of people.

Find close friends or family members that would be willing to spend one-on-one time with your kids. Encourage them to form meaningful relationships with people that you trust and that they can look up to.

Advertising

Role models can make a huge difference in the path that a child decides to take, so be intentional about the ones that you put in your kids’ lives.

14. Be Affectionate and Give Praise

Your children need your affection and praise on a daily basis. Engage with your kids as often as possible by playing with them, going on outings, and encouraging open dialogue.

Affirm them in the things that they are doing well, no matter how small. Praise their efforts, rather than their achievements. This will inspire them to continue to put forth hard work and not give up when success is not achieved.

Rather than spending money on gifts, spend time and effort in making lasting memories.

Final Thoughts

Being a single parent is a challenging responsibility to take on. Without the help of a partner to fall back on, single parents have a lot more to take on.

However, studies show that growing up in a single parent home does not have a negative effect on achievement in school. As long as the family is a stable and safe environment, kids are able to excel and do well in life.

Use these tips in order to be a reliable and capable parent for your kids, while maintaining your own well-being and sanity.

More Resources About Parenting

Featured photo credit: Bruno Nascimento via unsplash.com

Reference

Read Next