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If You Follow These 5 Rules, You Can Create A Perfect Relationship

If You Follow These 5 Rules, You Can Create A Perfect Relationship

Lots of people are in relationships that don’t make them truly happy. They love their partner and they don’t want to be with anyone else, but for some reason their relationship is filled with arguments and resentment. Sometimes they feel disrespected by their partner even though they know that their partner loves them. This can leave both partners feeling frustrated, confused and upset.

If you can relate to this you’re not alone. Lots of couples love each other, but they don’t know the relationship rules for a happy love life. If you want to create a perfect relationship, follow these 5 relationship rules:

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1. Make An Effort To Converse Every Day

One of the main issues in long-term relationships is when both partners stop making an effort to talk to each other. Instead of having interesting, thought-provoking conversations, all of the conversations start with “How are you?” or “How was work?”. While it is okay for some conversations to start like this, a happy couple will also talk about other things such as their interests or hobbies.

Small talk about boring subjects won’t bring you and your partner closer together. If anything it is more likely to pull you apart, as you will both start to feel like you have nothing in common with each other. Make the effort to ask your partner one interesting question a day, such as “Has anything made you laugh today?” The conversation will be much more enjoyable for both of you, and it gives you the opportunity to bond with each other.

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2. Be Vocal About Your Needs

Sometimes people expect their partners to be able to predict their thoughts, emotions and desires. They feel that they are entitled to this, but in reality this is unreasonable. If your partner doesn’t anticipate your needs over time you might start to feel hurt and angry, but this isn’t fair on your partner. It is your responsibility to vocalise your needs and feelings, and then it is your partner’s responsibility to respond in a loving way.

3. Write Down Your Thoughts Before Talking To Your Partner

When we are upset it can be tempting to lash out and get angry, but the best thing you can do is sit down and write out your thoughts. This gives you the chance to process and understand your feelings, and it will help you to figure out the root of the problem. Later when you discuss the problem with your partner you will feel calmer and less upset, so you are less likely to say something hurtful. It also means you will have a more positive attitude about solving the problem.

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4. Don’t Complain About Your Partner To Your Friends

Lots of people go to their friends about their relationship problems as they know that they will receive support and love. However, talking badly about your partner when they are not around to defend themselves can warp your perception of them, making you view them in a negative light. If you want to create a perfect relationship remember that communication is an important part of making a relationship work, so you should try to talk to your partner first instead of your friends.

5. Don’t Hold On To Every Little Thing

One of the most toxic traits in a relationship is keeping score. Your partner forgot to take out the bins, so you’re seething with anger. You didn’t take the chicken out of the freezer, so your partner called you selfish. Passive aggressive behaviour like this indicates that there is a serious problem in the relationship, but instead of addressing it you both continue to obsess over the little things.

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If you can relate to this, try to work on being more relaxed and positive. Remind yourself every day that happiness is built on patience, love and understanding – not resentment and pettiness.

Featured photo credit: Josh Willink via pexels.com

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Amy Johnson

Amy is a writer who blogs about relationships and lifestyle advice.

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Last Updated on September 17, 2019

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

Positive thinking can lead to a lot of positive change in your life. Developing an optimistic outlook can be good for both your physical and mental health.

But sometimes, certain situations arise in life that makes it hard to keep a positive outlook. Take steps to make positive thinking become more like your second nature and you’ll reap the biggest benefits.

Here are 10 ways to make thinking positive thoughts easy:

1. Spend Time with Positive People

If you surround yourself with constant complainers, their negativity is likely to rub off on you.

Spend time with positive friends and family members to increase the likelihood that their positive thinking habits will become yours too. It’s hard to be negative when everyone around you is so positive.

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2. Take Responsibility for Your Behavior

When you encounter problems and difficulties in life, don’t play the role of the victim. Acknowledge your role in the situation and take responsibility for your behavior.

Accepting responsibility can help you learn from mistakes and prevent you from blaming others unfairly.

3. Contribute to the Community

One of the best ways to feel good about what you have, is to focus on what you have to give.

Volunteer in some manner and give back to the community. Helping others can give you a new outlook on the world and can assist you with positive thinking.

4. Read Positive and Inspirational Materials

Spend time each day reading something that encourages positive thinking. Read the Bible, spiritual material, or inspirational quotes to help you focus on what’s important to you in life. It can be a great way to start and end your day.

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Some recommendations for you:

5. Recognize and Replace Negative Thoughts

You won’t be successful at positive thinking if you’re still plagued by frequent negative thoughts. Learn to recognize and replace thoughts that are overly negative. Often, thoughts that include words like “always” and “never” signal that they aren’t true.

If you find yourself thinking something such as, “I always mess everything up,” replace it with something more realistic such as, “Sometimes I make mistakes but I learn from them.”

There’s no need to make your thoughts unrealistically positive, but instead, make them more realistic.

6. Establish and Work Toward Goals

It’s easier to be positive about problems and setbacks when you have goals that you’re working toward. Goals will give you motivation to overcome those obstacles when you encounter problems along the way. Without clear goals, it’s harder to make decisions and gauge your progress.

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Learn to set SMART goals to help you achieve more.

7. Consider the Consequences of Negativity

Spend some time thinking about the consequences of negative thinking. Often, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

For example, a person who thinks, “I probably won’t get this job interview,” may put less effort into the interview. As a result, he may decrease his chances of getting the job.

Create a list of all the ways negative thinking impacts your life. It likely influences your behavior, your relationships, and your feelings. Then, create a list of the ways in which positive thinking could be beneficial.

8. Offer Compliments to Others

Look for reasons to compliment others. Be genuine in your praise and compliments, but offer it frequently. This will help you look for the good in other people.

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9. Create a Daily Gratitude List

If you start keeping a daily gratitude list, you’ll start noticing exactly how much you have to be thankful for. This can help you focus on the positive in your life instead of thinking about all the bad things that have happened in the day.

Getting in the habit of showing an attitude of gratitude makes positive thinking more of a habit. Here’re 40 Simple Ways To Practice Gratitude.

10. Practice Self-Care

Take good care of yourself and you’ll be more equipped to think positively.

Get plenty of rest and exercise and practice managing your stress well. Taking care of your physical and mental health will provide you with more energy to focus on positive thinking.

Learn about these 30 Self-Care Habits for a Strong and Healthy Mind, Body and Spirit.

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Featured photo credit: DESIGNECOLOGIST via unsplash.com

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