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Four Tips to Building Your Child’s Confidence

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Four Tips to Building Your Child’s Confidence

It all started for me when they were babies – watching them roll over, calming their tantrums and perfecting the sounds and motions that put them to sleep. I got them this far, but teaching them to have confidence in themselves is taking more effort.

My babies have grown and have begun to question themselves and others and their own abilities. It is hard to know how to give them the confidence they need. I won’t be able to stop other kids from making fun of them and I can’t make parents demand their child play with my child. I’ve learned from experience, however, building a confident child takes a vision and a whole lot of confidence in yourself and your own abilities.

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1. Start with a vision

Building self-esteem takes a vision, seeing something nobody else can. I know building confidence takes a mama bear to see them for who they are and who they will become. The problem is we don’t always see it in the moment, we sometimes just hear the sound of our own tantrums after they’ve disappointed us with another potty accident or messy bedroom.

I’m learning even though I know my kids so well – I taught them to walk, I make their meals three times a day, and I get them to school – I can’t always get them to open up, and I won’t always know the best ways to raise them.

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2. Ignore your fears

For starters my first child has been a handful since year one, and I spent my entire summer worried he would be a handful for his kindergarten teacher. What if his dynamic personality took over the entire mood in the class? He tends to do that in our home. Despite my fears, however, my son’s teacher has told me he has done brilliantly in kindergarten. I spent my time seeing the worst instead of the best in him. As a young mom I need to put my own fears down for both of our sakes.

I realize moms can feed their fears or feed their hope. If I really focus, my intuition tells me there are great things to come for my little boy. Because of his passion and mine, I’m sure he will have our rough patches – but with a little hope, and a lot of listening, he will develop a strong sense of self and become something fantastic.

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3. Seek first to understand then be understood

The trick is the more I understand what my boy is feeling and telling me, the more he will listen and believe the things I say to him and about him.

What I learned and what I know I’ve gained under the guidance of my own mother. Growing up she believed in me, even when I didn’t believe in me. She called me beautiful and smart and always mentioned to me when she noticed I did something right or made someone else smile. She always had her eye on who I was and eventually I was able to become who she saw.

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More than being a nurturer, as a mom you’re an example. Kids watch you, and do what you do and not what you say. From the moment they roll over your kids take their lead from you. They learn to follow everything you do. I’m convinced the most important concept to building your child’s self esteem is having a strong self esteem. My mom was fearless, and I learned it from her.

4. Expect their confidence to be challenged

My babies are going to get a few hits to their confidence – sometimes more than others. Even though we know our kids so well and often over estimate them or under estimate them, they are going to take a wrong step from time to time. Have faith your children can make it through crazy hard stuff and they will stand on their own two feet someday and make you proud.

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Parenting is no walk in the park, but neither is growing up. Both you and your child have to work hard at becoming who you and they want to be. With a little direction your kids will follow your lead and you’ll both have the confidence you’ve always wanted.

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Last Updated on January 5, 2022

How to Help Your Child to Get Better Grades

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How to Help Your Child to Get Better Grades

Children are most likely to say that they want to just lounge around or rest for a while after spending hours listening to lecture after lecture from their teachers. There is nothing wrong with this if they had a rough day.

What’s disturbing, is if they deliberately stay away from schoolwork or procrastinate when it comes to reviewing for their tests or completing an important science project.

When it seems that it is becoming a habit for your child to put off school work, it’s time for you to step in and help your child develop good study habits to get better grades. It is important for you to emphasize to your child the importance of setting priorities early in life. Don’t wait for them to flunk their tests, or worse, fail in their subjects before you talk to them about it.

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You can help your children hurdle their tests with these 7 tips:

1. Help them set targets

Ask your child what they want to achieve for that particular school year. Tell them to set a specific goal or target. If they say, “I want to get better grades,” tell them to be more specific. It will be better if they say they want to get a GPA of 2.5 or higher. Having a definite target will make it easier for them to undertake a series of actions to achieve their goals, instead of just “shooting for the moon.”

2. Preparation is key

At the start of the school year, teachers provide an outline of a subject’s scope along with a reading list and other course requirements. Make sure that your child has all the materials they need for these course requirements. Having these materials on hand will make sure that your child will have no reason to procrastinate and give them the opportunity to study in advance.

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3. Teach them to mark important dates

You may opt to give them a small notebook where they can jot down important dates or a planner that has dates where they can list their schedule. Ask them to show this to you so you can give them “gentle reminders” to block off the whole week before the dates of an exam. During this week, advise your child to not schedule any social activity so they can concentrate on studying.

4. Schedule regular study time

Encourage your child to set aside at least two hours every day to go through their lessons. This will help them remember the lectures for the day and understand the concepts they were taught. They should be encouraged to spend more time on subjects or concepts that they do not understand.

5. Get help

Some kids find it hard to digest or absorb mathematical or scientific concepts. Ask your child if they are having difficulties with their subjects and if they would like to seek the help of a tutor. There is nothing wrong in asking for the assistance of a tutor who can explain complex subjects.

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6. Schedule some “downtime”

Your child needs to relax from time to time. During his break, you can consider bringing your child to the nearest mall or grocery store and get them a treat. You may play board games with them during their downtime. The idea is to take his mind off studying for a limited period of time.

7. Reward your child

If your child achieves their goals for the school year, you may give them a reward such as buying them the gadget they have always wanted or allowing them to vacation wherever they want. By doing this, you are telling your child that hard work does pay off.

Conclusion

You need to take the time to monitor your child’s performance in school. Your guidance is essential to helping your child realize the need to prioritize their school activities. As a parent, your ultimate goal is to expose your child to habits that will lay down the groundwork for their future success.

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Featured photo credit: Annie Spratt via unsplash.com

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