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You Can Make Everyone Like You Instantly (By Mastering These 4 Types Of Jokes)

You Can Make Everyone Like You Instantly (By Mastering These 4 Types Of Jokes)

We all know that one person who is instantly likeable wherever they go. Everyone seems to be drawn to them and you sit back wondering how they really do it.

While it could be charisma, charm, or just a warm inviting smile that gets people to open up and feel comfortable with them, the ability to engage people in an endearing and fun way is usually the key to getting people to like you almost straight away.

Mastering these 4 types of jokes in your interactions can instantly make you more likeable. See if you can identify with them or enhance them more with those around you.

1. The Joke’s On You

Making yourself the butt of a joke is probably one of the most obvious ways to make people like you. The importance of learning to laugh at yourself shows others that you don’t take yourself too seriously and instantly makes them feel they’re on a level pegging to you. It’s even been known to be a sign that someone has an optimistic personality [1]

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With this in mind, don’t be afraid to downplay yourself for the sake of a lighthearted moment.

“I’m in shape. Round is a shape, right?”

“They all laughed when I said I’d become a comedian. Well, they’re not laughing now.”

Self-deprecating humour is the basis of many comedians’ jokes and allows you to be more relatable since we all have our insecurities and making light of them shows we are confident and able to admit to having them.

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2. Make Sure You Aren’t Alienating Anyone

Making jokes, especially in a group, requires you to be more attentive to everyone in the room. It’s easy to make a general joke that most would find hilarious but make sure it’s not ostracising anyone or making someone else the butt of the joke. While it could be done in innocent jest and get mostly laughs from people, if that one person gets offended or upset it can be perceived as hurtful.

In this case, make sure you keep your banter and joking to general subjects unless you know for sure that you aren’t going to offend anyone. In other words, don’t create a loser – making jokes at someone’s expense is a big no-no if you want people to like you.

3. Play On Their Securities Rather Than Their Insecurities

Poking fun at people or teasing can be a good way to come across as endearing but only if it’s done in the right way. We all have insecurities and these are likely to be around things that are permanent, uncommon or core to our identity.

This is why it’s important to be aware of how other people may feel. Making a joke about someone sneezing and throwing their germs towards you is fine because it’s a temporary, common illness that they can’t help. But making a joke about the way someone looks, for example jokingly commenting that a person’s new haircut makes them look like a boy, may be intended as lighthearted but could bring up an insecurity and make you much less likeable.

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4. Be An Ego Booster

Another way to poke fun at people is to do it with good context and by that I mean build them up, make them feel good and give their ego a little boost. Then you can throw in a tease at the end.

This strategy allows the person to see that you view them as a great person while adding some humour in with the mix. For example:

“Did you know James managed to set up his own successful business, is up for the Business Man Of The Year award, mentors young entrepreneurs, manages to run a football team and raises four kids with his beautiful wife. What a loser!”

This will instantly allow people to see you as a person that recognises and appreciates the good and accomplishments of others while keeping a playful tone.

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Conclusion

Remember that humour is one of the quickest and most affective ways to get people to like you. Be silly, be playful and goofy along with the four pointers above. We are often drawn in by people who are able to do this on a daily basis but how often do we do this ourselves? Work on ways you can add a bit humour and brightness to someone’s day!

Featured photo credit: Brooke Cagle via unsplash.com

Reference

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Jenny Marchal

A passionate writer who loves sharing about positive psychology.

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Last Updated on August 4, 2020

The Gentle Art of Saying No For a Less Stressful Life

The Gentle Art of Saying No For a Less Stressful Life

No!

It’s a simple fact that you can never be productive if you take on too many commitments — you simply spread yourself too thin and will not be able to get anything done, at least not well or on time.

But requests for your time are coming in all the time — through phone, email, IM or in person. To stay productive, and minimize stress, you have to learn the Gentle Art of Saying No — an art that many people have problems with.

What’s so hard about saying no? Well, to start with, it can hurt, anger or disappoint the person you’re saying “no” to, and that’s not usually a fun task. Second, if you hope to work with that person in the future, you’ll want to continue to have a good relationship with that person, and saying “no” in the wrong way can jeopardize that.

But it doesn’t have to be difficult or hard on your relationship. Here’s how to master the Gentle Art of Saying No:

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1. Value Your Time

Know your commitments, and how valuable your precious time is. Then, when someone asks you to dedicate some of your time to a new commitment, you’ll know that you simply cannot do it. And tell them that: “I just can’t right now … my plate is overloaded as it is.”

2. Know Your Priorities

Even if you do have some extra time (which for many of us is rare), is this new commitment really the way you want to spend that time?

For myself, I know that more commitments means less time with my wife and kids, who are more important to me than anything.

3. Practice Saying No

Practice makes perfect. Saying “no” as often as you can is a great way to get better at it and more comfortable with saying the word. And sometimes, repeating the word is the only way to get a message through to extremely persistent people. When they keep insisting, just keep saying no. Eventually, they’ll get the message.

4. Don’t Apologize

A common way to start out is “I’m sorry but …” as people think that it sounds more polite. While politeness is important, apologizing just makes it sound weaker. You need to be firm, and unapologetic about guarding your time.

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5. Stop Being Nice

Again, it’s important to be polite, but being nice by saying yes all the time only hurts you. When you make it easy for people to grab your time (or money), they will continue to do it. But if you erect a wall, they will look for easier targets.

Show them that your time is well guarded by being firm and turning down as many requests (that are not on your top priority list) as possible.

6. Say No to Your Boss

Sometimes we feel that we have to say yes to our boss — they’re our boss, right? And if we say “no,” then we look like we can’t handle the work — at least, that’s the common reasoning.

But in fact, it’s the opposite — explain to your boss that by taking on too many commitments, you are weakening your productivity and jeopardizing your existing commitments. If your boss insists that you take on the project, go over your project or task list and ask him/her to re-prioritize, explaining that there’s only so much you can take on at one time.

7. Pre-Empting

It’s often much easier to pre-empt requests than to say “no” to them after the request has been made. If you know that requests are likely to be made, perhaps in a meeting, just say to everyone as soon as you come into the meeting,

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“Look guys, just to let you know, my week is booked full with some urgent projects and I won’t be able to take on any new requests.”

8. Get Back to You

Instead of providing an answer then and there, it’s often better to tell the person you’ll give their request some thought and get back to them. This will allow you to give it some consideration, and check your commitments and priorities. Then, if you can’t take on the request, simply tell them:

“After giving this some thought, and checking my commitments, I won’t be able to accommodate the request at this time.”

At least you gave it some consideration.

9. Maybe Later

If this is an option that you’d like to keep open, instead of just shutting the door on the person, it’s often better to just say,

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“This sounds like an interesting opportunity, but I just don’t have the time at the moment. Perhaps you could check back with me in [give a time frame].”

Next time, when they check back with you, you might have some free time on your hands.

10. It’s Not You, It’s Me

This classic dating rejection can work in other situations. Don’t be insincere about it, though. Often, the person or project is a good one, but it’s just not right for you, at least not at this time.

Simply say so — you can compliment the idea, the project, the person, the organization … but say that it’s not the right fit, or it’s not what you’re looking for at this time. Only say this if it’s true — people can sense insincerity.

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Featured photo credit: Kyle Glenn via unsplash.com

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